My reaction???
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Today, one guy from one of the company that my gf laise with to get her company shipement out called her and asked her out for a drink. She told me that later she will be going drinking with the shipping guy. And she had asked her best friend to join her too as this is the first time she is meeting this shipping guy.My frist reaction was....huh?
Of course I would feel jealous and unhappy about this. But other then that, thats nothing much that I could really do. I told my self not to get jealous over this kind of thingy. Must have trust in my gf.
But sometimes its not easy to do what you preached.
I asked her "Why you said YES to his invitation?" She said " My company is on budget constraint so maybe after meeting him up as
a friend the cost would be reduced" So I told her, when there is once there will be twice and followed by many many times.
And she told me she would always asked her best friend to go along with her.
Sometimes I do feel very insecure. I know there are other posts like mine. She got more male friends then females friends. And of course everyday she would get sms from all these male friends.
Which she do not really know them very well. Sms like...how are you to more mushy sms. She did show all the sms to me when I was with her.
I admit i am jealous over all this. But hey I am a human afterall and I have emotions too. -
relac... as she got her fren wif her should b safe la... let her noe ur concerns but oso hv trust her...
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She said " My company is on budget constraint so maybe after meeting him up as a friend the cost would be reduced"
Wow... she must be somebody in the company? If not why and when will any one got this 'lobang' go drink with client or business associate? -
she is not...she is working in a small company.Originally posted by Joshua1975:Wow... she must be somebody in the company? If not why and when will any one got this 'lobang' go drink with client or business associate?
and she is not the decision maker. That makes me wonder why she agreeded on going in the first place?
All i know is that she wanna cut down some cost thats all. -
i just don't know how?Originally posted by BrUtUs:relac... as she got her fren wif her should b safe la... let her noe ur concerns but oso hv trust her...
I am someone who cannot hide my emotions.
When I am happy u can see it and when i am sad..
u can see it. I am just like an open book. -
Har, than you just have to beware and look out for sign liao loh...Originally posted by Seventh_Son:she is not...she is working in a small company.
and she is not the decision maker. That makes me wonder why she agreeded on going in the first place?
All i know is that she wanna cut down some cost thats all. -
i has a somewhat similar experiences to urs.. so cld relate to how u feel.
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My bf will be furious if i do that....
So usually i dun... -
Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:i has a somewhat similar experiences to urs.. so cld relate to how u feel.
me nosy, 
so what happen in the end? -
i really do not know how to react right now?Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:i has a somewhat similar experiences to urs.. so cld relate to how u feel.
mix feelings...
there is anger
there is jealousy
i do not know how to talk to her later when she calls
as in how to not get mad or pretending i am alright? -
I am unhappy right nowOriginally posted by shirurinu:My bf will be furious if i do that....
So usually i dun...
but not to the extend of furious.
I cannot possibily stop her from going?
I cannot get mad at her for this? as i know I dun own her?
But....hiaz....... -
betrayal? I really dun know?Originally posted by Joshua1975:Har, than you just have to beware and look out for sign liao loh...
but i dun think she is this kind.
as i always know she is someone with
big circle of friends.
maybe she is just too friendly to others that
sometimes i feel insecure... -
zhen si zuan nui jio jian. like that you change one gal friend who you will not worry one lar.Originally posted by Seventh_Son:betrayal? I really dun know?
but i dun think she is this kind.
as i always know she is someone with
big circle of friends.
maybe she is just too friendly to others that
sometimes i feel insecure... -
haahaa maybe thats a good ideaOriginally posted by Joshua1975:zhen si zuan nui jio jian. like that you change one gal friend who you will not worry one lar.
i dun know? trust or not to trust?
its like a struggle within? -
Originally posted by Seventh_Son:haahaa maybe thats a good idea
i dun know? trust or not to trust?
its like a struggle within?
that is what life all about. -
i believed so...Originally posted by Joshua1975: that is what life all about.
all my relationships there were insecurity in me and my ex.
pain and pain and nothing but pain.
As for my current gf we have been together for like only 3 months.
Its really a show time I know.
Maybe I have more to understand about her and her ways of doing things. This is a relatively new relationship and....i do not know
how things would turn out? Its not healthy if i were to think too much about it.
When i was single i would try to always to get to know more girls.
I have freedom, i do not have to be responsible to anyone.
I do what i like and no one would care.
And now I am attached...i miss those days where i am alone.
Sometimes being single is really good. -
My case is 99% similiar to yours, shipping line,customer asking her out for dinner, ktv, etc...and she agreed all but with her collegue...Originally posted by Seventh_Son:betrayal? I really dun know?
but i dun think she is this kind.
as i always know she is someone with
big circle of friends.
maybe she is just too friendly to others that
sometimes i feel insecure...
For your case, to cut down cost n hence going out with the customer seems to be abit absurd...but it could be true...Feeling insecure means that you actually have no faith n confidence in you n trust in her.. -
it ended.. i initated the breakupOriginally posted by Joshua1975: me nosy, so what happen in the end?
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Hmm...does your gf own that company? If not, the excuse that she gave you is super lame. And you should not take it lightly like this. Girls most of the time ask their good friend to go along and check out guys that they are meeting up with...I should know, I was checked.Originally posted by Seventh_Son:Today, one guy from one of the company that my gf laise with to get her company shipement out called her and asked her out for a drink. She told me that later she will be going drinking with the shipping guy. And she had asked her best friend to join her too as this is the first time she is meeting this shipping guy.My frist reaction was....huh?
Of course I would feel jealous and unhappy about this. But other then that, thats nothing much that I could really do. I told my self not to get jealous over this kind of thingy. Must have trust in my gf.
But sometimes its not easy to do what you preached.
I asked her "Why you said YES to his invitation?" She said " My company is on budget constraint so maybe after meeting him up as
a friend the cost would be reduced" So I told her, when there is once there will be twice and followed by many many times.
And she told me she would always asked her best friend to go along with her.
Sometimes I do feel very insecure. I know there are other posts like mine. She got more male friends then females friends. And of course everyday she would get sms from all these male friends.
Which she do not really know them very well. Sms like...how are you to more mushy sms. She did show all the sms to me when I was with her.
I admit i am jealous over all this. But hey I am a human afterall and I have emotions too.
Next time ask her to chio you along, as you are closer to her than her best friend...at least more chemistry with her and you can help her to get a big discount from the shipping guy. Just don't behaved like a couple in front of the shipping guy, but behaved like you are going after her again. Think you can see clearly what kind of animal is hidden under the skin of that shipping guy. I can guess...wolf.
Let her know that you are jealous and she should know what to do. If she is almost clueless about what she should do, can you please tell her where your limits is. As long as she doesn't cross the line with other guys....by the way, she has already cross your line when she allowed other guys to get so close to her. Do something about it, but please be nice...very nice and polite about it. Don't be a wimp, stand your ground when it is absolutely necessary.
Good luck.......
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Y u initiated the breakup? Did she do anything wrong?Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:it ended.. i initated the breakup
I recently have a similar exp with my bf too. First outing with forum mates then he make a lot of noise.. then quarrel then almost break up.. and he's the one who initiated.. y huh.... *COnfused*
I mean it's nothing wrong ma... but y guys reaction can be so big.. -
Originally posted by dcx:My case is 99% similiar to yours, shipping line,customer asking her out for dinner, ktv, etc...and she agreed all but with her collegue...
For your case, to cut down cost n hence going out with the customer seems to be abit absurd...but it could be true...Feeling insecure means that you actually have no faith n confidence in you n trust in her..
I feel that insercurity & jealousy is inherent in everyone, jus that such emotions get highlighted when one is a relationship.
& i know that the common comments ppl usually giv is such emotions is stem from having no confidence in oneself, having no trust in ur partner.. but i honestly hate such comments.
with love, i believe, comes a degree of jealousy/possessiveness.. its only natural.
its only the way which u act out such emotions that reflect ur level of maturity. voicing out ur concerns/insercurity in a heart to heart talk with ur partner is a gd way to solve solve such issues.
to feel is human
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X 2Originally posted by shirurinu:Y u initiated the breakup? Did she do anything wrong?
I recently have a similar exp with my bf too. First outing with forum mates then he make a lot of noise.. then quarrel then almost break up.. and he's the one who initiated.. y huh.... *COnfused*
I mean it's nothing wrong ma... but y guys reaction can be so big.. Ya ya why why why??? 3 mth oni and you??? like that how to have gal friend???? -
Bring your bf along next time lor...so he can also have some fun with the forumites.Originally posted by shirurinu:Y u initiated the breakup? Did she do anything wrong?
I recently have a similar exp with my bf too. First outing with forum mates then he make a lot of noise.. then quarrel then almost break up.. and he's the one who initiated.. y huh.... *COnfused*
I mean it's nothing wrong ma... but y guys reaction can be so big.. -
You are a human.Originally posted by Seventh_Son:Today, one guy from one of the company that my gf laise with to get her company shipement out called her and asked her out for a drink. She told me that later she will be going drinking with the shipping guy. And she had asked her best friend to join her too as this is the first time she is meeting this shipping guy.My frist reaction was....huh?
Of course I would feel jealous and unhappy about this. But other then that, thats nothing much that I could really do. I told my self not to get jealous over this kind of thingy. Must have trust in my gf.
But sometimes its not easy to do what you preached.
I asked her "Why you said YES to his invitation?" She said " My company is on budget constraint so maybe after meeting him up as
a friend the cost would be reduced" So I told her, when there is once there will be twice and followed by many many times.
And she told me she would always asked her best friend to go along with her.
Sometimes I do feel very insecure. I know there are other posts like mine. She got more male friends then females friends. And of course everyday she would get sms from all these male friends.
Which she do not really know them very well. Sms like...how are you to more mushy sms. She did show all the sms to me when I was with her.
I admit i am jealous over all this. But hey I am a human afterall and I have emotions too.
You are entitled to feel what you feel.
But is it neccessary or rather even doing the relationship any good for if I am the competitor, this is exactly what I would do to kill your relationship and you are effectively walking into my net.
Jealousy is something that exist and has little avenue to channel out. If one were to be angry, to blow one's top or even whack the wall is common. If one is sad, to be depressed or cry is common. If one is jealous? You can rant, but in the end, you can only untangle this knot yourself if you wanna feel better because trust me, none of the above methods will make you feel any better.
In the end, it is a matter of preception, trust and self esteem.
Do you even realise that if she wanna walk out on you - she could ANYTIME declare this relationship dead and leave just like that? She doesn't have to have more guy friends or whatsoever. If your relationship is going to shake because of this, you are going to have a hard time.
P.S: Internal problems breed from inside is ten times more tricky and difficult than external problems crashing onto your love.
Cheers -
It's not a matter or right or wrong.. but whether one can accept it.
If she is jus a good fren,i probably wouldn't be affected by how she conducts her lifestyle.
But if she's my gf, i guess that's a different story.
She has a lot of male frens, frequently go out with them (watching movie on sat till 3am, going to dinner in restaurant alone with a colleague, going clubbing with her gal frens till dawn)
i guess it wouldn't be easy or fair for her to change.. & neither can i accept such behaviours. well, in my case, she didn't do anythk wrong in all her outings ( at least that's what she told me); but to spare myself from further agony, i decided to end it.
Perhaps someone like me is not suitable to be in a relationship too