long distance relationship
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Hi FireIceOriginally posted by FireIce:but u 2 haben physically met each other and do those things tt "normal couples" do.....
where do u go from here?
plan to get married over webcam?
I am plannig to get married. Of course i will bring her to sg. She has been to sg too when she was doing a course here.
But before that i need to solve some problems first.
Regardz -
Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi sk
In replying ur first question:
We have not meet each other face to face but we exchange alot pictures between ourselves
We speak to each other almost everyday
Yup i did pose to request something on LDR but it is not i mworry abt it
I want to hear ppl advice on how to keep the relationship going on healthy as ppl advise will always give me ideas and views on how to upkeep and maintain my relationship
U are right in pointing out some of my problems
As for age it does not serve as a barrier to us both of us feel that it is all right for us cos the age difference isnt great
Religion currently is the main problem
I dun have a great way to solve it yet and it has been a constant worry on my head
As for family
She has talk to my mom on the phone before
So far so good
Marriage
We do have the thoughts of getting married nxt yr
Do note that you people have never met before and in my theory context, this relationship is NOT a LDR - it is more of a cyber-relationship. Sure she may be distance away, but as long as flesh-and-blood meeting, dating and hanging out did not ONCE take place ever in your life, it is not consider LDR, yet.
There is a difference.
This so-called love still contain a huge percentage of you being in love with your imagination. Yes, you seen her photos and yes there are phone calls being made everyday - but how much actual personality can you derive from there? You cannot deduce suitability from these channels alone and this creates a delusion of a perfect or very good relationship to be form.
This conjure a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship and I would advise against marriage on such grounds for the risk is too great. In your situation - talk of marriage shouldn't be there yet, in fact, you two should be more concern over how a actual relationship would be like and to check personality, situations, adapt culture, thinking, mindsets, compromise, past experience, religion etc, when she comes over here to stay or vice vista. At least one year half would be good.
P.S: If the above pointers is cleared, religion issue wouldn't be too much of an issue for love would be strong to overcome them. If the above issue is stuck, you can't even move, let alone worry about religion issue.
Cheers -
Hi Yunhaier.Originally posted by Yunhaier: Do note that you people have never met before and in my theory context, this relationship is NOT a LDR - it is more of a cyber-relationship. Sure she may be distance away, but as long as flesh-and-blood meeting, dating and hanging out did not ONCE take place ever in your life, it is not consider LDR, yet.
There is a difference.
This so-called love still contain a huge percentage of you being in love with your imagination. Yes, you seen her photos and yes there are phone calls being made everyday - but how much actual personality can you derive from there? You cannot deduce suitability from these channels alone and this creates a delusion of a perfect or very good relationship to be form.
This conjure a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship and I would advise against marriage on such grounds for the risk is too great. In your situation - talk of marriage shouldn't be there yet, in fact, you two should be more concern over how a actual relationship would be like and to check personality, situations, adapt culture, thinking, mindsets, compromise, past experience, religion etc, when she comes over here to stay or vice vista. At least one year half would be good.
P.S: If the above pointers is cleared, religion issue wouldn't be too much of an issue for love would be strong to overcome them. If the above issue is stuck, you can't even move, let alone worry about religion issue.
Cheers
I have thought of what u write in this reply. I do agree that not much of the personality can be derive from call. That makes me worried abt certain issues and things.
I am not sure that if that has create a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship. Maybe it has or mayb it has not. I am not very good in handling relationship. I am oso concern abt how a actual relationship should be like and if possible, i will like to bring that to mine into reality.
Thks for for clearing some doubts.
Regardz -
Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi Yunhaier.
I have thought of what u write in this reply. I do agree that not much of the personality can be derive from call. That makes me worried abt certain issues and things.
I am not sure that if that has create a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship. Maybe it has or mayb it has not. I am not very good in handling relationship. I am oso concern abt how a actual relationship should be like and if possible, i will like to bring that to mine into reality.
Thks for for clearing some doubts.
Regardz You see: you are not even sure and uncertainity fills your mind; I seriously think that marriage should be a much later thing. Don't implicate your own relationship - take issue one at a step. Too much of it will drown your relationship.
Very often when we slip into a marriage or relationship based on impulse emotions that isn't substantial in the long run, as the fuel dies out, we feel that it may not be the choice we ultimately want. With love comes karma - its difficult to say whether it can or cannot work in your case yet, but certainly, we want to make sure the storm wouldn't be heavy enough to sink the ship.
Bring that relationship in reality first before anything should take place or consider. If everything goes well, spending additional one and a half years or so in courtship would be even better.
P.S: There is no rush in true love.
Cheers -
Quite nicely written...Originally posted by Yunhaier: Do note that you people have never met before and in my theory context, this relationship is NOT a LDR - it is more of a cyber-relationship. Sure she may be distance away, but as long as flesh-and-blood meeting, dating and hanging out did not ONCE take place ever in your life, it is not consider LDR, yet.
There is a difference.
This so-called love still contain a huge percentage of you being in love with your imagination. Yes, you seen her photos and yes there are phone calls being made everyday - but how much actual personality can you derive from there? You cannot deduce suitability from these channels alone and this creates a delusion of a perfect or very good relationship to be form.
This conjure a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship and I would advise against marriage on such grounds for the risk is too great. In your situation - talk of marriage shouldn't be there yet, in fact, you two should be more concern over how a actual relationship would be like and to check personality, situations, adapt culture, thinking, mindsets, compromise, past experience, religion etc, when she comes over here to stay or vice vista. At least one year half would be good.
P.S: If the above pointers is cleared, religion issue wouldn't be too much of an issue for love would be strong to overcome them. If the above issue is stuck, you can't even move, let alone worry about religion issue.
Cheers
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It's stupid to STEREOTYPE people like that. Especially if it comes to your CLOSE ONES. You could be VERY UNFAIR to them?Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi Devil1976:
that funny too.
when i write that i felt funny too..
But then cant really express this feeling too, when she chat online, i cant help being unhappy sometimes.
Inside my heart, there is a mixture of scared, worry sometimes.
As for marrying a chatter part, my friend told me that marrying a chatter is the last thing in his life. (he always have the impression chatters and talk on the net for 24 hrs, somemore got so many ppl (wolves?) lurking around.
Besides chatting online is very addictive too
Regardz
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Hi YunhaierOriginally posted by Yunhaier: You see: you are not even sure and uncertainity fills your mind; I seriously think that marriage should be a much later thing. Don't implicate your own relationship - take issue one at a step. Too much of it will drown your relationship.
Very often when we slip into a marriage or relationship based on impulse emotions that isn't substantial in the long run, as the fuel dies out, we feel that it may not be the choice we ultimately want. With love comes karma - its difficult to say whether it can or cannot work in your case yet, but certainly, we want to make sure the storm wouldn't be heavy enough to sink the ship.
Bring that relationship in reality first before anything should take place or consider. If everything goes well, spending additional one and a half years or so in courtship would be even better.
P.S: There is no rush in true love.
Cheers
Guess you strike the jackpot again. You are right abt the presence uncertainity fills my mind. Mayb i may be rushing into things. It may be a strain on me and her. Mayb i need time to think though what the next step to take so that we can be closer to each other.
I understand what you mean.
Thks.
Regardz -
Hi Devil1976.Originally posted by Devil1976:It's stupid to STEREOTYPE people like that. Especially if it comes to your CLOSE ONES. You could be VERY UNFAIR to them?
I dun noe how true is that. (regardin online chattin)
I am rather neutral about it.
Juz cant be scared and worry sometimes. (guess that normal right?)
Regardz -
Sorry I'm gonna sound a bit blunt. Have you ever been in a relationship before? Has she?Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi sk
In replying ur first question:
We have not meet each other face to face but we exchange alot pictures between ourselves
We speak to each other almost everyday
Yup i did pose to request something on LDR but it is not i mworry abt it
I want to hear ppl advice on how to keep the relationship going on healthy as ppl advise will always give me ideas and views on how to upkeep and maintain my relationship
U are right in pointing out some of my problems
As for age it does not serve as a barrier to us both of us feel that it is all right for us cos the age difference isnt great
Religion currently is the main problem
I dun have a great way to solve it yet and it has been a constant worry on my head
As for family
She has talk to my mom on the phone before
So far so good
Marriage
We do have the thoughts of getting married nxt yr -
Anyway... You'll have a LONG WAY...Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi Devil1976.
I dun noe how true is that. (regardin online chattin)
I am rather neutral about it.
Juz cant be scared and worry sometimes. (guess that normal right?)
Regardz -
For once, Yunhaier! You didn't mention any horoscope, or star sign. Thank you!Originally posted by Yunhaier: Do note that you people have never met before and in my theory context, this relationship is NOT a LDR - it is more of a cyber-relationship. Sure she may be distance away, but as long as flesh-and-blood meeting, dating and hanging out did not ONCE take place ever in your life, it is not consider LDR, yet.
There is a difference.
This so-called love still contain a huge percentage of you being in love with your imagination. Yes, you seen her photos and yes there are phone calls being made everyday - but how much actual personality can you derive from there? You cannot deduce suitability from these channels alone and this creates a delusion of a perfect or very good relationship to be form.
This conjure a false sense of firm-foundation in a relationship and I would advise against marriage on such grounds for the risk is too great. In your situation - talk of marriage shouldn't be there yet, in fact, you two should be more concern over how a actual relationship would be like and to check personality, situations, adapt culture, thinking, mindsets, compromise, past experience, religion etc, when she comes over here to stay or vice vista. At least one year half would be good.
P.S: If the above pointers is cleared, religion issue wouldn't be too much of an issue for love would be strong to overcome them. If the above issue is stuck, you can't even move, let alone worry about religion issue.
Cheers
x1 to that!
x2 for what you said above!
x3 I totally agree! -
Hi skOriginally posted by :Sorry I'm gonna sound a bit blunt. Have you ever been in a relationship before? Has she?
Yes. but this is a kindda special one
In fact we both has been in a relationship b4
Regardz -
Hi sk,Originally posted by :For once, Yunhaier! You didn't mention any horoscope, or star sign. Thank you!
x1 to that!
x2 for what you said above!
x3 I totally agree!
does Yunhaier always mention any horoscope, or star sign in his/her reply?
Regardz -
U r right Devil1976Originally posted by Devil1976:Anyway... You'll have a LONG WAY...
Still have a long way.
Wish me luck
Regardz -
Originally posted by :For once, Yunhaier! You didn't mention any horoscope, or star sign. Thank you!
x1 to that!
x2 for what you said above!
x3 I totally agree!
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Originally posted by i_will_be_there:Hi Yunhaier
Guess you strike the jackpot again. You are right abt the presence uncertainity fills my mind. Mayb i may be rushing into things. It may be a strain on me and her. Mayb i need time to think though what the next step to take so that we can be closer to each other.
I understand what you mean.
Thks.
Regardz Hope you know what is best for your relationship and not heed purely on what you think you want.
Cheers -
~good luck.Originally posted by i_will_be_there:U r right Devil1976
Still have a long way.
Wish me luck
Regardz -
Try arranging a tour together to some beautiful place. That should help you
(1) Know her better
(2) Improve your relationship
(3) Actually seen her once
And since she is rich, what took her so long to meet up with you? Where is she from anyway? -
Hi Yunhaier.Originally posted by Yunhaier: Hope you know what is best for your relationship and not heed purely on what you think you want.
Cheers
Thks for your advice Yunhaier.
You been a great help -
Hi Qitai.Originally posted by Qitai:Try arranging a tour together to some beautiful place. That should help you
(1) Know her better
(2) Improve your relationship
(3) Actually seen her once
And since she is rich, what took her so long to meet up with you? Where is she from anyway?
Her Family is rich. Not she lah..
Besides i think it will only be right that i go over to meet her for the first time.
She is from KK.
Regardz -
KK= Kota Kinabaru?
In that case, very near. Not expensive to meet up at all. Just take Air Asia flight. Can go climb Mountain. -
Mine was a bad story.
I don't think you would wanna hear. -
Yup..Originally posted by Qitai:KK= Kota Kinabaru?
In that case, very near. Not expensive to meet up at all. Just take Air Asia flight. Can go climb Mountain.
Dun like air asia
Regardz -
Hi Lingos..Originally posted by Lingos:Mine was a bad story.
I don't think you would wanna hear.
Care to tell us what happen?
Regardz -
Originally posted by Lingos:Mine was a bad story.
I don't think you would wanna hear. How ya doing lately?
Not in Singapore?