Me chinese, she malay
-
Greetings to all there,
I need some truth advise.
I have a malay gf for almost 2 yrs. Her parents are very nice to me
I told my mom recently abt our relationship, and she objected. As im the only son *sigh*, she said that if i become a muslim, i would not bear my surname anymore.
I dont want to lose either side. Im from a broken family, she raised up 3 of us (2 sis)single handedly. Im proud of my mom. If i married into her family, mom would be left alone.
Must i really convert to be a muslim under the law? Any local website that u all noe can provide me useful info? Thx.
Im so sad. Why must we be confided into all these cultures and religions. We are all singaporean, shouldn't it be just simple...
Pls help me... sincere advise only. Thanks a million to all.
------------------
If you are to live to a hundred years old, i'm going to live a day older than u. So you will not live any single days without me -
I don't think I would be able to help here... But I know of a Chinese Muslim who knows his facts about religions and such quite well...?Originally posted by yantao:Greetings to all there,
I need some truth advise.
I have a malay gf for almost 2 yrs. Her parents are very nice to me
I told my mom recently abt our relationship, and she objected. As im the only son *sigh*, she said that if i become a muslim, i would not bear my surname anymore.
I dont want to lose either side. Im from a broken family, she raised up 3 of us (2 sis)single handedly. Im proud of my mom. If i married into her family, mom would be left alone.
Must i really convert to be a muslim under the law? Any local website that u all noe can provide me useful info? Thx.
Im so sad. Why must we be confided into all these cultures and religions. We are all singaporean, shouldn't it be just simple...
Pls help me... sincere advise only. Thanks a million to all. I guess he should be able to give you some good advices...? If you can, please leave behind an e-mail address and I'll forward his e-mail addy to you... But not sure if his e-mail's still active though? If it is, just tell him I recommended you to him and tell him your situation... Be polite, he's a friendly guy... I wish you luck in your relationship? -
Thanks. Appreciate that
I don't think I would be able to help here... But I know of a Chinese Muslim who knows his facts about religions and such quite well...? I guess he should be able to give you some good advices...? If you can, please leave behind an e-mail address and I'll forward his e-mail addy to you... But not sure if his e-mail's still active though? If it is, just tell him I recommended you to him and tell him your situation... Be polite, he's a friendly guy... I wish you luck in your relationship?
my email addr is: [email protected]
------------------
If you are to live to a hundred years old, i'm going to live a day older than u. So you will not live any single days without me
[This message has been edited by yantao (edited 07 June 2002).]
[This message has been edited by yantao (edited 07 June 2002).] -
i guess devil u mean token ring huh...
------------------
Don't Flame Me. -
U trying to hit the top reply rate is it??Originally posted by bigdeal:i guess devil u mean token ring huh...
If no better advise... then shut up!
It seems like when i browse other topics, u always have a leg inside there. And always all those crude remarks, silly remarks...
------------------
If you are to live to a hundred years old, i'm going to live a day older than u. So you will not live any single days without me
[This message has been edited by yantao (edited 08 June 2002).] -
Have u tok abt this with ur gf?if u havent,somehow,i think its beta to discuss this issue with her.Anyway,it concerns both of u rite?
------------------
As LoNg As I SHaLL LiVe
I'LL HoLd U dEaR
AnD I wILL rEMiNiScE
Of OuR LoVe ALL ThRoUgH
ThE YeArS.... -
I told her that i have told my mom. She quite disappointed. Shw wanted to know what i will do abt it. Like come out a way that both parties benefits.Originally posted by ApPlE_PiE:Have u tok abt this with ur gf?if u havent,somehow,i think its beta to discuss this issue with her.Anyway,it concerns both of u rite?
Wonder any kind soul out here have a malay gf and got married. How u all face it and do?? -
Just heard from a friend that you have to convert to Muslim under the law... <- Dunno how reliable is that info though? By the way, can I ask how old are you and your gf...?Originally posted by yantao:I told her that i have told my mom. She quite disappointed. Shw wanted to know what i will do abt it. Like come out a way that both parties benefits.
Wonder any kind soul out here have a malay gf and got married. How u all face it and do?? -
i got a friend who has a malay bf. its the opposite of ur case. the parents of both parties are kind, understanding enough to accept them. well, i think maybe your gf should pay a visit to your mum.. maybe your mum's thinking will change? it does help really
------------------
Eat to live, not live to eat -
Devil1976 > By the way, can I ask how old are you and your gf...?
Im 25th this yr. She 23rd. Converting to muslim is ok. Is just my mom willing to accept or not. She had said firmly "NO!" But i'm looking for other solutions.
Im looking for websites that shows all these things...
RoWLeY>i got a friend who has a malay bf. its the opposite of ur case. the parents of both parties are kind, understanding enough to accept them. well, i think maybe your gf should pay a visit to your mum.. maybe your mum's thinking will change? it does help really
We chinese cultures or believes is girl married into guy family. In ur friend's case, ur friend will married into muslim and to the guy. So makes not much diff.
I have bring her home b4. And my mom just said nothing. I can feel that she dont quite like it. But just kept quiet. I just want my gf to feel easy when coming my house.
Is there such a thing as she still remain as a muslim, we together, i as chinese-muslim. Still have my name. Children bear my surname. -
Hi, thanks for all ur replies. Appreciate that.
But i guess that this has come to the last chapter.
She will always be in my heart. At least now we are friends. I find that girls are hard to understand. Just only 2 days we still together... Guess they somehow or rather had inherit the blood of a ninja! -
eh.. BITE MEOriginally posted by yantao:U trying to hit the top reply rate is it??
If no better advise... then shut up!
It seems like when i browse other topics, u always have a leg inside there. And always all those crude remarks, silly remarks...
or RISK GETTING RAPED BY MY ELEPHANTS! READ MY SIGNATURE .. MOHAMMAD YANTAO!
------------------
Don't Flame Me. -
hmm??its quite true dat gers are hard to understand...im a ger too,and sometimes i pity my ex bfs,coz they alwaz said they cun understand me!Haiz,since now the both of u are alreadi frens,then juz take it as it is lor...at least u wun have all those unsolvable questions now...rite?Originally posted by yantao:Hi, thanks for all ur replies. Appreciate that.
But i guess that this has come to the last chapter.
She will always be in my heart. At least now we are friends. I find that girls are hard to understand. Just only 2 days we still together... Guess they somehow or rather had inherit the blood of a ninja!
Cheer up k?anything juz post here lor,im sure alot of ple are willing to hlp u!(including me!)
------------------
As LoNg As I SHaLL LiVe
I'LL HoLd U dEaR
AnD I wILL rEMiNiScE
Of OuR LoVe ALL ThRoUgH
ThE YeArS.... -
Thanks ApPlE_PiE. U really a kind soul here. I feel this community is like a family hehe. But is just that i feel remorseful.Originally posted by ApPlE_PiE:hmm??its quite true dat gers are hard to understand...im a ger too,and sometimes i pity my ex bfs,coz they alwaz said they cun understand me!Haiz,since now the both of u are alreadi frens,then juz take it as it is lor...at least u wun have all those unsolvable questions now...rite?
Cheer up k?anything juz post here lor,im sure alot of ple are willing to hlp u!(including me!)
Anyway im going to have my exam soon. So i should concentrate on my studies.
Cheers
------------------
For yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is present. That's why im a gift to you. -
Just follow your heart
if i'm not wrong, you HAVE to convert to muslim and thus have to change your name accordingly
hmmm heard it somewhere, from a friend or something....might be wrong...
good luck anyway
[This message has been edited by Prodigy (edited 10 June 2002).] -
hey hey, cool down! y so angry? bigdeal himself fell in love with a malay girl, so he is in the same shoes as you.. y so worked up?Originally posted by yantao:U trying to hit the top reply rate is it??
If no better advise... then shut up!
It seems like when i browse other topics, u always have a leg inside there. And always all those crude remarks, silly remarks... -
1 thing for sure, u have to convert to muslim.
abt the surname thing, some of my chinese muslim frens still keep their surname behind but as a last name.eg ahmad tan bin abdul.
in relationships, there is bound to be sacrifices and if u cant make that sacrifice, then u better think whether u shld be in a r/s in the 1st place
------------------
to live is evil...=) -
aiya...dun tok abt the converting liao lar..since its over then let it be lor...rite?
As for yantao--im glad dat at least u noe dat u still have to do some things..which are far by more impt!im sure u'll do well in ur exams,have faith in urself k?Gd Luck!
------------------
As LoNg As I SHaLL LiVe
I'LL HoLd U dEaR
AnD I wILL rEMiNiScE
Of OuR LoVe ALL ThRoUgH
ThE YeArS.... -
Hi joanne. Ya, u r right. I was not feeling very good on that day when i post the msg.
Tat's why i send out the msg.
Bigdeal >> I would like to apologise sincerly for what i have said in my post. Guess that most of us here have problems so we join this big community.
cheers brothers and sisters -
Originally posted by yantao:Hi joanne. Ya, u r right. I was not feeling very good on that day when i post the msg.
Tat's why i send out the msg.
Bigdeal >> I would like to apologise sincerly for what i have said in my post. Guess that most of us here have problems so we join this big community.
cheers brothers and sisters
------------------
Don't Flame Me. -
y u "ti qi" sad things up again?Originally posted by joanne:hey hey, cool down! y so angry? bigdeal himself fell in love with a malay girl, so he is in the same shoes as you.. y so worked up?
------------------
Don't Flame Me. -
hahahahaha... the whole world noes it..Originally posted by bigdeal:y u "ti qi" sad things up again? -
-_-`~Originally posted by bigdeal:eh.. BITE ME or RISK GETTING RAPED BY MY ELEPHANTS! READ MY SIGNATURE .. MOHAMMAD YANTAO! -
hi, juz feel puzzle.. why not your gf convert to chinese religion instead? In my church there are a few Malays converts..tink nowadays most Sporean Malays are more modern and become more open to accept other religions already ..
Did you find out more about the muslim teachings? Try attending some mulsim classes after your exams to understand more about your gf's culture and God. Then make the decision. Of course, if possible find a solution that you can get the girl but will also not break your mum's heart. Its really happy to see two pple from different races fall in love.. shows how great love is, overcoming cultural barriers, races and languages. I believe that one day the two of you will have very beautiful children! All the best -
Well thanks alot for ur advise...
I have thought of getting my gf to change instead... but have to think of her parents also..
Im actually feeling very bad that i cant met her expectation.. she feeling upset.
Our relationship had come to the end of the chapter.
Whether there is volumn 2.. im not sure. *sob sob*. Well i still have to take things easy.
Things now are getting complicated.