Is he taking too hard or m i really wrong...
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I have a multiply account.. but my bf dun like to join such website where i can know more ppl. So i did not tell him about it.
When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts. I have no choice so i gave it to him.
He read my messages sent and there was this msg i sent to a friend's friend whom i had never met before. Coz he is coming to sg next month and i asked him if i can show him around.
Because of this msg, my bf flew into a rage. He felt that i'm looking for a chance to have a fling. I have an intention to cheat behind his back.
When i sent that msg, it was just purely a friendly msg. But he felt that i have tat intention to cheat. He said by initiating to show him around, i'm throwing myself at this guy.
When i said it was purely a friendly invitation, he said i'm finding an excuse. He asked if the guy looks like moses lim, would i wan to show him around? Yes i admit this guy is pretty good looking.. but i really dun have the intention to do anything with this guy, however he dun believe.
He says by doing this, how can he trust me? It's the behavior of a s.l.u.t.
Do you guys really feel that gals who msg u first and wants to show u around is trying to throw herself at u?
How can i appease his anger? Whatever he wans me to do i already try to accomodate him. He doesn't wants me to go out too much, i did. He doesn't wants me to drink when he's not around i did. I'm a very friendly person before i met him... But because he doesn't like me to be to the wrong crowd... i kept to myself a lot and act dao...
In the past i did checked his email acc, he sent an email to someone on this adult forum to this gal who's looking for a one time affair for her criteria....
In his friendster acc, he msg pretty gals to add them.
He said he's fully devoted to me now yet i do this kind of things...
But i really wonder... is it wrong? -
i feel he is just being selfish
and furthermore he is practising double standards doing the same action (though worse! msging people instead of the other way round)
perhaps have a good talk with him in a public place when cooler heads prevail.
will check back later at 12pm... v tired. hey u take care yea? -
**Repeat post**
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nobody is right or wrong lor... if the role has been switched, will u mind?
Trust is not just abt an email or a multiple account... it ties in with other actions in life... just like surfing sgforums during official working hours is fine, but it takes the logical out when the person, in his own face-saving and defense, try claiming it to be part of his "JOB", that really takes the fun and integrity out of that person lor...
Get it
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i dun like this guy.Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts.
But then, i agreed to a certain extent his objection of you bringing an unknown guy around.
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hmmmm...... so he's 'so-called' controlling you loh.... so eventually one day if touch wood touch wood he dun like you liao..... then he will also be the one 'dumping' you?? everything also he control..... how can..... he can do this do that.... but you cannot?? bulls.hit.
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he is taking too hard and infringing on your own privacy by insisting u gave him the password to the account.
but, u urself have to blame... u are in a r/ship and yet u want to bring a stranger guy around? u obviously are too naive if u think...tts all and nothing else might happen on it or it doesnt mean anything at all.. -
Sounds like a case of insecure guy dating insecure gal.
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put yrself in his shoe...
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Dump him.
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and i still won't do what he's doing ...............Originally posted by blowfish:put yrself in his shoe...
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HAHAHAHAHA.....Originally posted by eutjin:and i still won't do what he's doing ............... -
Making friends only what.
What's there to get angry about.
He is one possessive fellow siah.
Gd luck to yr relationship. -
i have always believed that relationship shud be built on trust. both parties must have trust in each other. a relationship must also be based on communication. w/o these two elements, a relationship cannot exist. it mite exist for a short while but if both parties dun work hard on developing trust for each other and communicate calmly with each other if there is any problem arising, then it will not sustain its existence for a long time.
i.c.y -
lol. he is nuts.
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hmmm yesh he is self fish...
and wanna keep u "his belongings" to himself .. yet wan more new toys...
this kinda guy u still wan meh...
in no time.. he will be bedding others... behind ur back,...
be it one nite stand watever....
leave him.. u deserve better...
must grow up mah...
frens is frens ... gf is gf... must behave wat... and
make frens..is okie.. like go out wif sch fren opp sex is pretty normal...
if the gal is urs... she will naturally behave... same to guys.
--- one thing in relationship...
yesh be urself... nv change too much cos... u might lose all ur frens and lose ur inner self...
-- similar like doing sales line... very fake.. but that one is survive..diff...
dun tell mi u wanna be his controlled puppet till u marry ..live and die?...
BE URSELF and be happy...
if u the frenly type then be it... as ur future bf must be able to take it...
maybe in the 1st place tats wat he like abt u !!!
- and now.. u lost that character and he looking for others for tat kinda feeling... !! oh no... sad...
cos i find tat its very hard to be another person or customised urself... in a relationship.... for a long time.. ur inner self will erupt and broke dwn...
tat time comes ... u will hate urself...
yesh...u will feel sad/ when relationship ended...
but who dun... ?...
make a new start , dun pretend to be a very nice everything good person... jus be urself...
and live life to the fullest...
makes lotsa frens.. and keep well ur good frens...
cos if the relationship turn sour due to somethings...
its ur good frens tat will be ard... while he turn his back on u... -
Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:I have a multiply account.. but my bf dun like to join such website where i can know more ppl. So i did not tell him about it.
When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts. I have no choice so i gave it to him.
He read my messages sent and there was this msg i sent to a friend's friend whom i had never met before. Coz he is coming to sg next month and i asked him if i can show him around.
Because of this msg, my bf flew into a rage. He felt that i'm looking for a chance to have a fling. I have an intention to cheat behind his back.
When i sent that msg, it was just purely a friendly msg. But he felt that i have tat intention to cheat. He said by initiating to show him around, i'm throwing myself at this guy.
When i said it was purely a friendly invitation, he said i'm finding an excuse. He asked if the guy looks like moses lim, would i wan to show him around? Yes i admit this guy is pretty good looking.. but i really dun have the intention to do anything with this guy, however he dun believe.
He says by doing this, how can he trust me? It's the behavior of a s.l.u.t.
Do you guys really feel that gals who msg u first and wants to show u around is trying to throw herself at u?
How can i appease his anger? Whatever he wans me to do i already try to accomodate him. He doesn't wants me to go out too much, i did. He doesn't wants me to drink when he's not around i did. I'm a very friendly person before i met him... But because he doesn't like me to be to the wrong crowd... i kept to myself a lot and act dao...
In the past i did checked his email acc, he sent an email to someone on this adult forum to this gal who's looking for a one time affair for her criteria....
In his friendster acc, he msg pretty gals to add them.
He said he's fully devoted to me now yet i do this kind of things...
But i really wonder... is it wrong?
The is the classic behavior of a chauvinist male afflicted with strong jealousy and possessive nature - I could do what I feel like, but you must keep yourself untainted with any other males.
Crap.
A relationship will work itself to achieve higher state of happiness and improvement and when it counter-act against this phenomenon, you get a destructive relationship that breaks your initial positive qualities and forced you to adopt character and mindsets that you could jolly well avoid.
Under AOS, these man would be destroy utterly with this vulnerability.
*** You probably have only one option:
I) To change, influence and remove that ego of his. If he desire to stand atop and exercise command into the relationship, pull him to where you are standing and walk together. Relationship with power struggle always have position like this: remove that and learn to walk side by side as a couple. Same level, same everything.
This infact, is not an easy task and people usually die trying. (Worst if your bf is a Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius or Taurus).
P.S: Jealousy and possessiveness are issues that could be worked out - Usually chauvinist can only be enlighten within.
Cheers -
Let him UNDERSTAND that you'll need to get YOUR OWN LIFE other than HIS ONLY...Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:I have a multiply account.. but my bf dun like to join such website where i can know more ppl. So i did not tell him about it.
When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts. I have no choice so i gave it to him.
He read my messages sent and there was this msg i sent to a friend's friend whom i had never met before. Coz he is coming to sg next month and i asked him if i can show him around.
Because of this msg, my bf flew into a rage. He felt that i'm looking for a chance to have a fling. I have an intention to cheat behind his back.
When i sent that msg, it was just purely a friendly msg. But he felt that i have tat intention to cheat. He said by initiating to show him around, i'm throwing myself at this guy.
When i said it was purely a friendly invitation, he said i'm finding an excuse. He asked if the guy looks like moses lim, would i wan to show him around? Yes i admit this guy is pretty good looking.. but i really dun have the intention to do anything with this guy, however he dun believe.
He says by doing this, how can he trust me? It's the behavior of a s.l.u.t.
Do you guys really feel that gals who msg u first and wants to show u around is trying to throw herself at u?
How can i appease his anger? Whatever he wans me to do i already try to accomodate him. He doesn't wants me to go out too much, i did. He doesn't wants me to drink when he's not around i did. I'm a very friendly person before i met him... But because he doesn't like me to be to the wrong crowd... i kept to myself a lot and act dao...
In the past i did checked his email acc, he sent an email to someone on this adult forum to this gal who's looking for a one time affair for her criteria....
In his friendster acc, he msg pretty gals to add them.
He said he's fully devoted to me now yet i do this kind of things...
But i really wonder... is it wrong?
You're his GF. Not working for him PRIVATE LIMITED. -
i will get angry if i was him also... thats abit too friendly of u le.
he msg gers also wrong la -
Dear XiaoMaYi,Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:I have a multiply account.. but my bf dun like to join such website where i can know more ppl. So i did not tell him about it.
When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts. I have no choice so i gave it to him.
He read my messages sent and there was this msg i sent to a friend's friend whom i had never met before. Coz he is coming to sg next month and i asked him if i can show him around.
Because of this msg, my bf flew into a rage. He felt that i'm looking for a chance to have a fling. I have an intention to cheat behind his back.
When i sent that msg, it was just purely a friendly msg. But he felt that i have tat intention to cheat. He said by initiating to show him around, i'm throwing myself at this guy.
When i said it was purely a friendly invitation, he said i'm finding an excuse. He asked if the guy looks like moses lim, would i wan to show him around? Yes i admit this guy is pretty good looking.. but i really dun have the intention to do anything with this guy, however he dun believe.
He says by doing this, how can he trust me? It's the behavior of a s.l.u.t.
Do you guys really feel that gals who msg u first and wants to show u around is trying to throw herself at u?
How can i appease his anger? Whatever he wans me to do i already try to accomodate him. He doesn't wants me to go out too much, i did. He doesn't wants me to drink when he's not around i did. I'm a very friendly person before i met him... But because he doesn't like me to be to the wrong crowd... i kept to myself a lot and act dao...
In the past i did checked his email acc, he sent an email to someone on this adult forum to this gal who's looking for a one time affair for her criteria....
In his friendster acc, he msg pretty gals to add them.
He said he's fully devoted to me now yet i do this kind of things...
But i really wonder... is it wrong?
Your bf is jus too possessive over you.. Too da nan ren zhu yi liao.. First thing.. You have your own freedom and privacy to do things you like.. there's no reason for you to report to him everything you does.. Yes, he may not like about you joining forums and chat to know ppl.. he shows concern.. and scared that you might be cheated online.. which alot of cases are like tat.. meeting online friends this n that.. but then he jus too over protective and selfish in his doings..
Secondly, even if he found out that you did have multiple account, he got no rights to go and check your personal stuffs and read your messages... this is too much.. intruding your privacy.. He dun show respect to you.. and wat's more.. he dun trust you at all..
He can do watever things he like.. and you can? Most couples becos of such reasons.. always end up quarrelling.. He's taking you for granted! Do you have to be so tame and let him do his way.. Come on.. Get up and bring yourself.. change him.. let him understand.. if this is the way he wants to lead his life.. he's not goin anywhere far~ Try to see each other at the same level.. let you do your things.. and let him do his.. there's no need to fear whether one day he/she will leave you.. even if it is.. it will be a good ending.. like tat jealousy and possessiveness can be reduced.. less quarrelling also..
Always have a talk to each other which ever things that you aren't satisfied.. compromise with each other.. this will make the relaionship.. better.. and still going strong.. harmony!
He said he's fully devoted..Everyone can say that... but has he proven it? I can't say totally you are not in the wrong.. In the first place you know he dun like about all this.. then you should not use his computer and log into all these accounts or webby you go to.. You jus throwing yourself into the tiger's mouth.. And for him.. he jus being over concern and "kan cheong" over you.. Don't worry.. He have to learn.. have a talk with him.. Try ways (if possible) to change his thinkings.. and understand not only on this matter. but many many consequences..
Cheers..
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You can tell him : That if he trusts you , he shouldn't be saying such things. And If he loves u , he should learn to trust u
If he continues whining about ur behaviour ....goes to show ..ur better off without him- dump him ....right a guy fully devoted to his gf shouldn't be fooling around on the comp either -
he's a leo... u r right.....Originally posted by Yunhaier: The is the classic behavior of a chauvinist male afflicted with strong jealousy and possessive nature - I could do what I feel like, but you must keep yourself untainted with any other males.
Crap.
A relationship will work itself to achieve higher state of happiness and improvement and when it counter-act against this phenomenon, you get a destructive relationship that breaks your initial positive qualities and forced you to adopt character and mindsets that you could jolly well avoid.
Under AOS, these man would be destroy utterly with this vulnerability.
*** You probably have only one option:
I) To change, influence and remove that ego of his. If he desire to stand atop and exercise command into the relationship, pull him to where you are standing and walk together. Relationship with power struggle always have position like this: remove that and learn to walk side by side as a couple. Same level, same everything.
This infact, is not an easy task and people usually die trying. (Worst if your bf is a Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius or Taurus).
P.S: Jealousy and possessiveness are issues that could be worked out - Usually chauvinist can only be enlighten within.
Cheers
i just dunno how to communicate with him really.... its like "u can voice out ur opinion but its up to me whether i will accept it"...
mayb 2 out 0f 10 times he will aaccept lo -
In short, and I hope u are not offended, I feel that there is no trust between u 2. How to make the r/s work like this??? Maybe u 2 need to have a good talk instead of checking each others emails, and accounts...Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:I have a multiply account.. but my bf dun like to join such website where i can know more ppl. So i did not tell him about it.
When he's asleep today, i used his pc and log into my multiply account. When he woke up, he used his pc and realised that i had visit multiply site and he asked me if i have an account. And i said yes... he asked for my password because he wants to see my contacts. I have no choice so i gave it to him.
He read my messages sent and there was this msg i sent to a friend's friend whom i had never met before. Coz he is coming to sg next month and i asked him if i can show him around.
Because of this msg, my bf flew into a rage. He felt that i'm looking for a chance to have a fling. I have an intention to cheat behind his back.
When i sent that msg, it was just purely a friendly msg. But he felt that i have tat intention to cheat. He said by initiating to show him around, i'm throwing myself at this guy.
When i said it was purely a friendly invitation, he said i'm finding an excuse. He asked if the guy looks like moses lim, would i wan to show him around? Yes i admit this guy is pretty good looking.. but i really dun have the intention to do anything with this guy, however he dun believe.
He says by doing this, how can he trust me? It's the behavior of a s.l.u.t.
Do you guys really feel that gals who msg u first and wants to show u around is trying to throw herself at u?
How can i appease his anger? Whatever he wans me to do i already try to accomodate him. He doesn't wants me to go out too much, i did. He doesn't wants me to drink when he's not around i did. I'm a very friendly person before i met him... But because he doesn't like me to be to the wrong crowd... i kept to myself a lot and act dao...
In the past i did checked his email acc, he sent an email to someone on this adult forum to this gal who's looking for a one time affair for her criteria....
In his friendster acc, he msg pretty gals to add them.
He said he's fully devoted to me now yet i do this kind of things...
But i really wonder... is it wrong?
"Do not do unto others what u dont want others do unto u" -
It's time for both of you to have a good talk and make some things clear...Originally posted by XiaoMaYi:he's a leo... u r right.....
i just dunno how to communicate with him really.... its like "u can voice out ur opinion but its up to me whether i will accept it"...
mayb 2 out 0f 10 times he will aaccept lo
Transparency is always better than when sh|t comes in much later..? -
i also leo...i have also learnt to listen...
show him ur heart....then transparency comes in.