What's wrong with me? No gal interested...
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Hey. I've a pretty serious problem. Seems like no matter what I do, gals are not a bit interested in me. So I'm a classic failure when it comes to dating and relationships.
You see, previously I was pretty much a recluse and introverted guy. I didn't talk much nor try to be prominent or outstanding hence no gal took note of me.
Then 3 years ago, I had a crush on a gal and things didn't work out. I analyzed what went wrong and why I liked her (she was the friendly and out-going sort but not exactly pretty either) and thought maybe my cold and reclusive personality is what turning people off. Hence I decided I need to change my public relation skills.
Therefore, I tried to be as friendly as possible to all my friends (male and female). I tried keeping in touch with them on regular basis when possible, sending them New Year and Christmas cards and popping them a hello instant message if they go online in ICQ or MSN, and trying to start casual conversations if they're not busy.
Still, everyone sounds very cold and uninterested even though I've already taken my first step to be more friendly and outgoing.
OK. Though not very handsome, but I'm not that horrible-looking either that I scare people off. I would put myself as an average or alightly-above average looking guy. And in terms of financial status, not rich but not in heavy debt either, so somewhere in the middle.
Now I don't know what I can do. What's wrong with me? -
maybe u can go for some of the outings here... let the people here get to know you.... then maybe it's easier to give u their opinion?? anyway there's a sentosa outing coming on... u might wanna come??
if not is hang around here more..... let the people get to know you??
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Socialising in good but take your time... And don't do such things in an expectant of getting a 'return'... Don't do it for the SAKE of doing it too...?
Perhaps your friends around you have already got such an impression of you... So it won't be so easily to change that impression they have of you... Takes time...
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yaya.... come 4 outings....
meet more friends....
most ppl here ver friendly 1.....
execpt a few despos....
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because m.c.king joined since 26 Nov 2000 but posts < 100?
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yah... i remember last time i have a fren also very quiet... then suddenly very enthusiastic in contacting us and stuff... felt uncomfortable and in the end... started avoiding him... scared is mlm or insurance....Originally posted by Devil1976:Socialising in good but take your time... And don't do such things in an expectant of getting a 'return'... Don't do it for the SAKE of doing it too...?
Perhaps your friends around you have already got such an impression of you... So it won't be so easily to change that impression they have of you... Takes time... -
Hey cheer up! Maybe you just too anxious to be their friends... relax! As Estee said, do go out for the outings...
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Well maybe he might have posted less than 100, but maybe his less than 100 posts equates to AS MUCH AS FI has written...Originally posted by InnoHippo:because m.c.king joined since 26 Nov 2000 but posts < 100?
Most of FI's 50k post are all 1 liners... with a few words. (What else can you expect from a bot?) -
I also classic failure in relationship, no gals fancy me... Just when I took out the courage today and "BANG"... bang right hard to the wall
.. sigh
I guess because ur friends could not accept the sudden change of you so need to give them a little bit of time...
I also not bad looking also but confirm poor man... ..
Dun worry, u will meet ur gal one day.... If u want to noe more ppl.. then go to the sentosa outing.. Estee oreadi mentioned that..
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hahahaha... actually, except for a few points.. I can also say my life is just ur clone life....
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Yeah... Such things take time... Evolution don't happens overnight... Can you imagine you sleeping then next morning you wake up, your mother has 4 arms, your father 3 legs... I mean... What the heck...??Originally posted by Estee:yah... i remember last time i have a fren also very quiet... then suddenly very enthusiastic in contacting us and stuff... felt uncomfortable and in the end... started avoiding him... scared is mlm or insurance.... -
aiyah, i also no gf or wat....if u are studying, study hard, if u are working, work hard, love is a bonus, not a requirement...harsh may it seems but its true, i also like to have gf but somethings can't be forced one lah....i rather some gal like u for wat u truly are than like u becos of ur pretended outlook. make more friends, one may realise u are suitable for her and u may just find the one u like after sometime. love and like is different, i like alot of gals cos they pretty but...til now i don't really love anyone.
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Take this advice or its sort... Start with a new group of friends.. At least they don't know your background... And as you starts to get comfortable with yourself and builds up your confidence, you can then meet up with your old friends...Originally posted by Estee:maybe u can go for some of the outings here... let the people here get to know you.... then maybe it's easier to give u their opinion?? anyway there's a sentosa outing coming on... u might wanna come??
if not is hang around here more..... let the people get to know you??
You don't even have to 'show' them your changes... They'll probably just 'feel' it...
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whip ur dick out more...show it off...girls like to see & touch a big snake...
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*pat pat*Originally posted by BeNo:I also classic failure in relationship, no gals fancy me... Just when I took out the courage today and "BANG"... bang right hard to the wall .. sigh
I guess because ur friends could not accept the sudden change of you so need to give them a little bit of time...
I also not bad looking also but confirm poor man... ..
Dun worry, u will meet ur gal one day.... If u want to noe more ppl.. then go to the sentosa outing.. Estee oreadi mentioned that.. -
<---- pointing at a despoOriginally posted by joker105:yaya.... come 4 outings....
meet more friends....
most ppl here ver friendly 1.....
execpt a few despos.... -
Originally posted by eutjin:*pat pat*
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nvm nvm ...... i'm not getting any positive response anywayOriginally posted by BeNo: 
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Dun overdo. u might came across as fake and intentional.
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Aiyo, your example a bit extreme lah ... don't scare the poor boy...Originally posted by Devil1976:Yeah... Such things take time... Evolution don't happens overnight... Can you imagine you sleeping then next morning you wake up, your mother has 4 arms, your father 3 legs... I mean... What the heck...?? 
You make it sound like some Twilight Zone episode .... -
Originally posted by Devil1976:
tt's good advice. to your old friends, it's quite shocking especially if someone
Socialising in good but take your time... And don't do such things in an expectant of getting a 'return'... Don't do it for the SAKE of doing it too...?
Perhaps your friends around you have already got such an impression of you... So it won't be so easily to change that impression they have of you... Takes time...
suddenly have a change of attitude overnight. they could be wondering like
wad's wrong wif this guy or is he up to something? to those whom u know,
it's better if u would show your enthusiastic side slowly and on more personal instances as group situations r always awkward and suddenly sticking out like a sore thumb is a no-no.
on the note of making new friends, yeah go ahead and be as friendly as possible but not excessively as it once again, it would only put your motive into question.
everything takes time and take one small step at a time.
for deciding to step out of your introverted self and giving yourself a whole new image, i congrat you and applaud u. -
dun worry, maybe ur time is not ripe yet, dun be too rush for r/s, perhaps u wil get a nice gf next time. cheers
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nothing wrong wif u....nobody bothers why u bother...ur life u happy can oredi..no need to make others happyOriginally posted by m.c.king:Hey. I've a pretty serious problem. Seems like no matter what I do, gals are not a bit interested in me. So I'm a classic failure when it comes to dating and relationships.
You see, previously I was pretty much a recluse and introverted guy. I didn't talk much nor try to be prominent or outstanding hence no gal took note of me.
Then 3 years ago, I had a crush on a gal and things didn't work out. I analyzed what went wrong and why I liked her (she was the friendly and out-going sort but not exactly pretty either) and thought maybe my cold and reclusive personality is what turning people off. Hence I decided I need to change my public relation skills.
Therefore, I tried to be as friendly as possible to all my friends (male and female). I tried keeping in touch with them on regular basis when possible, sending them New Year and Christmas cards and popping them a hello instant message if they go online in ICQ or MSN, and trying to start casual conversations if they're not busy.
Still, everyone sounds very cold and uninterested even though I've already taken my first step to be more friendly and outgoing.
OK. Though not very handsome, but I'm not that horrible-looking either that I scare people off. I would put myself as an average or alightly-above average looking guy. And in terms of financial status, not rich but not in heavy debt either, so somewhere in the middle.
Now I don't know what I can do. What's wrong with me? -
don worry u`re not alone
NOBODY wans me too
or at least not that i know of..
Give love some time
Let LOVE come to you. -
Originally posted by m.c.king:Hey. I've a pretty serious problem. Seems like no matter what I do, gals are not a bit interested in me. So I'm a classic failure when it comes to dating and relationships.
You see, previously I was pretty much a recluse and introverted guy. I didn't talk much nor try to be prominent or outstanding hence no gal took note of me.
Then 3 years ago, I had a crush on a gal and things didn't work out. I analyzed what went wrong and why I liked her (she was the friendly and out-going sort but not exactly pretty either) and thought maybe my cold and reclusive personality is what turning people off. Hence I decided I need to change my public relation skills.
Therefore, I tried to be as friendly as possible to all my friends (male and female). I tried keeping in touch with them on regular basis when possible, sending them New Year and Christmas cards and popping them a hello instant message if they go online in ICQ or MSN, and trying to start casual conversations if they're not busy.
Still, everyone sounds very cold and uninterested even though I've already taken my first step to be more friendly and outgoing.
OK. Though not very handsome, but I'm not that horrible-looking either that I scare people off. I would put myself as an average or alightly-above average looking guy. And in terms of financial status, not rich but not in heavy debt either, so somewhere in the middle.
Now I don't know what I can do. What's wrong with me?
It's great that you realise there are problem you have to rectify.
It's even better when you decide to do something about it:
However, the key to socialising is to be natural about socialising.
You probably made similar mistake of those who share the same fate as you: to attempt to be friendly and ended up being awkward to others and self.
Hold it there. Don't give it up.
You need time to fine-tune, perfect and make adjustment as you go.
Cheers