leaving behind an undefined relationship
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I'm a guy yearning for a ger's love. I'm very lost. I fell in love with my female best friend 2mth ago before I embark for 4years of undergraduate study abroad. Over a year, both of us has grown very emotionally attached to each other. We confided with each other everything, and even petted and had sex. In fact, she admitted that it was quite impossible to live a life without me.
She accepted me as her bf for two weeks before my departure, partly because she dont want to regret in her life for making a wrong pass at me. we broke up just before i left. During that brief two weeks, she still find it awkward to even hold my hand or vice versa, but we had no problem frenching. I asked her why she find it so awkward. She says she's not sure if she loves me, but she knows that she needs me in almost every aspect of her life. She ask me to give her more time to think thru, if she actually loves me. She tells me she's very confused yet always so glad to talk and see me. She's not sure if this is love. She needed more time to think thru, as she's in the midst of her A LEVELS now. Sigh.. to me, if u realise that u finally found a person that u cant afford to spend your life without, it must be that u love her. Sometimes I wonder if it's my hot temper that always stop her from totally accepting me. She asked me to wait for her answer till next valentine's day, after A levels. I wasnt convinced as it could be a convenient mean to reject me by sending an sms after I'm gone from Singapore. I told her I will believe if she actually strip in public. She refused to strip cuz it involves her dignity. I told her I wont believe her at all. Told her to "get out of my life!". She then actually strip which I stop in time. I only wanted to see how true her words mean, not her stripping. She still sends me away at the airport although i m suppose to check in at 4am and her class starts at 8am.
When I finally call her 4days after touching down, she told me she cried for 2 successive days, and ask me to call her 10min everyday. Her actions tell me that she loves me but she's too confused to recognise it.
My heart is aching cuz the deadline (feb14) is 4mth away (freaking long). what to do? -
Live in the present.
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Does she actually love me? I need a 3rd Party Assesment...
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Maybe you should ask yourself if you love her too? Asking her to strip in public is not what you do to someone you love.
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Work on your relationship... And on that you're on a long distance relationship with you, it'll probably be a good opportunity to work the relationship and convince her.. You're probably lacking on good foundation for the relationship.. That's why she's pretty much confused and not convinced... Either that or she might have other hidden reason(s)... Build on the relationship... Like I've said, now's a good chance to prove things...Originally posted by yearning:Does she actually love me? I need a 3rd Party Assesment...
~All the best...
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wah lao i dunno wat r u thinking...asking ur gf to strip in public....
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I do feel very sorry for your gf. You have completely stepped on her dignity at the expense of fulfilling your own selfish belief. I guess it was her bad luck for falling for a guy who doesn't trust, love and respect her for who she is. Nevertheless, she sounds like she really loves you alot...so treasure, appreciate and accept her for who she is and never force her to do anything against her will...for example, the street strip.Originally posted by yearning:I'm a guy yearning for a ger's love. I'm very lost. I fell in love with my female best friend 2mth ago before I embark for 4years of undergraduate study abroad. Over a year, both of us has grown very emotionally attached to each other. We confided with each other everything, and even petted and had sex. In fact, she admitted that it was quite impossible to live a life without me.
She accepted me as her bf for two weeks before my departure, partly because she dont want to regret in her life for making a wrong pass at me. we broke up just before i left. During that brief two weeks, she still find it awkward to even hold my hand or vice versa, but we had no problem frenching. I asked her why she find it so awkward. She says she's not sure if she loves me, but she knows that she needs me in almost every aspect of her life. She ask me to give her more time to think thru, if she actually loves me. She tells me she's very confused yet always so glad to talk and see me. She's not sure if this is love. She needed more time to think thru, as she's in the midst of her A LEVELS now. Sigh.. to me, if u realise that u finally found a person that u cant afford to spend your life without, it must be that u love her. Sometimes I wonder if it's my hot temper that always stop her from totally accepting me. She asked me to wait for her answer till next valentine's day, after A levels. I wasnt convinced as it could be a convenient mean to reject me by sending an sms after I'm gone from Singapore. I told her I will believe if she actually strip in public. She refused to strip cuz it involves her dignity. I told her I wont believe her at all. Told her to "get out of my life!". She then actually strip which I stop in time. I only wanted to see how true her words mean, not her stripping. She still sends me away at the airport although i m suppose to check in at 4am and her class starts at 8am.
When I finally call her 4days after touching down, she told me she cried for 2 successive days, and ask me to call her 10min everyday. Her actions tell me that she loves me but she's too confused to recognise it.
My heart is aching cuz the deadline (feb14) is 4mth away (freaking long). what to do?
I know that you yearned for a girl's love, but you will need to learn how to properly love a girl first before a girl can give her love to you.
Be nice. -
For a smart guy, u did a very stupid thing asking yr gf to strip in public.
There are better ways to prove her love for u. -
I think the gal is better off without U...whats more with your "strip in public" stunt.U seems to want to find a gf before U leave for ur studies,for reasons only U know.Originally posted by yearning:I wasnt convinced as it could be a convenient mean to reject me by sending an sms after I'm gone from Singapore. I told her I will believe if she actually strip in public. She refused to strip cuz it involves her dignity. I told her I wont believe her at all. Told her to "get out of my life!". She then actually strip which I stop in time. -
yalor,wat the fark were u thinking?????Originally posted by RaTtY81:wah lao i dunno wat r u thinking...asking ur gf to strip in public....
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it was just a test, he stopped her in time didn't heOriginally posted by amuletgurl:yalor,wat the fark were u thinking????? -
a test...Originally posted by An Eternal Now:it was just a test, he stopped her in time didn't he wat kind of test is tat... -
its more than a test.and it shows his immaturity.Originally posted by An Eternal Now:it was just a test, he stopped her in time didn't he -
yep...just a test
next test - jump on the mrt track
nothing wrong ya? its just a test -
exactly,i know wat he is trying to do,but thats quite childishOriginally posted by RaTtY81:a test... wat kind of test is tat...
im sad to say this,even though if he does carry on this relationship,it will not last long,she was unsure,he is gonna be a distance away ,for 4 yrs apart,these two ppl will actually meet other ppl,no doubt abt it...lack of communication afterwards,then feelings will die,then after 4 yrs,things will be different... -
i only ask. I didnt let her strip.
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btw i wasnt looking for a gf before i leave. it wasnt pre-planned fyi. i had never thought of it until sth really bad happened between us at one time.
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You made her strip.
Hmm... i don't think you have the right to demand anything from this girl. -
still,your immaturity shows.U are not suitable for her.In fact,I dont think U are suitable for anyone at least for now...just let it go and leave for your studies.Hopefully I wouldnt post the same comment if U post another situation few years down the road.Originally posted by yearning:i only ask. I didnt let her strip. -
In that case U are not ready to handle a gf and things that comes with it.Originally posted by yearning:btw i wasnt looking for a gf before i leave. it wasnt pre-planned fyi. i had never thought of it until sth really bad happened between us at one time. -
hey..i dun noe wat is wrong wif u...Originally posted by yearning:I'm a guy yearning for a ger's love. I'm very lost. I fell in love with my female best friend 2mth ago before I embark for 4years of undergraduate study abroad. Over a year, both of us has grown very emotionally attached to each other. We confided with each other everything, and even petted and had sex. In fact, she admitted that it was quite impossible to live a life without me.
She accepted me as her bf for two weeks before my departure, partly because she dont want to regret in her life for making a wrong pass at me. we broke up just before i left. During that brief two weeks, she still find it awkward to even hold my hand or vice versa, but we had no problem frenching. I asked her why she find it so awkward. She says she's not sure if she loves me, but she knows that she needs me in almost every aspect of her life. She ask me to give her more time to think thru, if she actually loves me. She tells me she's very confused yet always so glad to talk and see me. She's not sure if this is love. She needed more time to think thru, as she's in the midst of her A LEVELS now. Sigh.. to me, if u realise that u finally found a person that u cant afford to spend your life without, it must be that u love her. Sometimes I wonder if it's my hot temper that always stop her from totally accepting me. She asked me to wait for her answer till next valentine's day, after A levels. I wasnt convinced as it could be a convenient mean to reject me by sending an sms after I'm gone from Singapore. I told her I will believe if she actually strip in public. She refused to strip cuz it involves her dignity. I told her I wont believe her at all. Told her to "get out of my life!". She then actually strip which I stop in time. I only wanted to see how true her words mean, not her stripping. She still sends me away at the airport although i m suppose to check in at 4am and her class starts at 8am.
When I finally call her 4days after touching down, she told me she cried for 2 successive days, and ask me to call her 10min everyday. Her actions tell me that she loves me but she's too confused to recognise it.
My heart is aching cuz the deadline (feb14) is 4mth away (freaking long). what to do?
if i m the girl, i wud definetely leave u!
of coz lah...this not only involves dignity...i really dun noe wat to say of u ah!!
how can u ask a girl to strip in public to declare her love for u?
y dun u ask her to jump down a block of flats? or someting more drastic.
ask urself wat u can do for her?
if u really like/love her...u wud not even have this tots in ur mind...
seriously...u r not ready...
pls...take some time n think it thru.. -
All these shows that you have a sense of insecurity within you. firstly, you should not be too bothered if she loves you or not, it doesn't not matter. Make her want you everyday.
Secondly, the stupid 14 Feb deadline is another crappy thing, what kind of deadline is that? you either get together or you don't, no need deadline. any girl who needs a deadline to decide if she should accepts you does not love you enough so have none of that nonsense.
Thirdly, dont be too bothered by whether you two are together or not. When you truly make her want you, even if you don't want to be her bf, she still insists that you are.
Therefore, get a grip of yourself and your own life. Good luck! -
i m bloody 10000km away. The deadline is just sth spoken - whether it's enforced is another matter. Do u think i want her to bear the pain of my absence? The deadline was mentioned in view of that..
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hm.. least she understands my background. sth u all dont. I think Lution meant that long distance relationship will never work out, so it doesnt matter what she thinks or feels. I admit that I'm feeling guilty of making her doing something so "out-of-this-world" and "out-of-mind", but it has already happened, so please not continue to condemn me. I feel insecure and this has gotta do with my background, plus I dont want to lose a precious confidente - her. Sigh..
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in fact, out of my own insecurity, i sought to study at the best institutions that Singapore and the world gotta offered. Academic competence doesn't pay out that good. I always feel somthing amiss in my life
