Are guys afraid of gossip?

• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:36

  what do I do with a guy who is so shy he will just clam up whenever there are people gossiping about us? I have no idea why he is so afraid of rumors. He used to spend with me and now he is avoiding me and when I asked him why, he hinted it is because people are talking. So I said...let them talk lor. Then he said cannot, must find a way to stop this gossip. I think people must have found out about our date the other day, and basically now everyone we know suddenly seem to know about us going out, even though it is only once. I dunno what to think about this. Grr
  
  i.c.y
• pie

  24 Oct 04, 12:38

  try asking him why he needs to 'stop the gossip'?
  
  maybe his parents are strict
• Patrik

  24 Oct 04, 12:40

  Yeah..some guys are sensitive..
  They cannot tahan pple toking abt him behind his back
• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:40

  Originally posted by pie:

  try asking him why he needs to 'stop the gossip'?
  
  maybe his parents are strict

  his parents are not here. neither is mine
  he said he is scared. i asked him why. he just said he is sumone who is scared of a lot of things.
  
  i.c.y
• the Bear

  24 Oct 04, 12:41

  to be brutally blunt... what's more important?
  
  "gossip", or you?
• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:42

  Originally posted by Patrik:

  Yeah..some guys are sensitive..
  They cannot tahan pple toking abt him behind his back

  i dunno why they are like that. I mean..let them talk la. Not like he is doing anything wrong. If you ignore these people, they will stop one day.
  
  i.c.y
• huiz

  24 Oct 04, 12:42

  maybe he is not ready to annouce ur relationship.
• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:43

  Originally posted by the Bear:

  to be brutally blunt... what's more important?
  
  "gossip", or you?

  i really have no idea now.
  dats y i told him, fine if dun wan to meet nvm lor. i will go on wif my life as usual. after all i m used to not having anyone by my side.
  
  i.c.y
• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:44

  Originally posted by huiz:

  maybe he is not ready to annouce ur relationship.

  i m not asking him to announce it. we are not even in a r/s yet. but isn't it cruel to just leave me hanging just because some people are talking abt us?
  
  i.c.y
• the Bear

  24 Oct 04, 12:45

  i think he's not figured things out...
  
  people WILL talk, not matter what one does...
  
  i think he'll lead a life scared of everything and anything... real or imagined...
  
  

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  i really have no idea now.
  dats y i told him, fine if dun wan to meet nvm lor. i will go on wif my life as usual. after all i m used to not having anyone by my side.
  
  i.c.y

• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:46

  Originally posted by the Bear:

  i think he's not figured things out...
  
  people WILL talk, not matter what one does...
  
  i think he'll lead a life scared of everything and anything... real or imagined...
  
  

  i think he doesn't know what he wants.
  i shudn't care anymore.
  
  i.c.y
• pie

  24 Oct 04, 12:48

  do you know why is he afraid of the gossip?
  
  - scared that someone he knows will find out?
  - feel embarrased?
  - just feels uncomfortable?
  - don't you have a bf or something..what if this person finds out?
  
  i don't know him nor his side of the story but probably u want to talk
  with him to find out. maybe he has experienced something similar in the past? some types of gossip can be damaging, even if u just ignore it
  
  
• the Bear

  24 Oct 04, 12:48

  2 things you can do... try to figure things out with him.. but on the surface, it seems like he doesn't want to face things...
  
  the other, is like you said.. forget about it, forget about him...
  
  

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  i think he doesn't know what he wants.
  i shudn't care anymore.
  
  i.c.y

• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:50

  Originally posted by the Bear:

  2 things you can do... try to figure things out with him.. but on the surface, it seems like he doesn't want to face things...
  
  the other, is like you said.. forget about it, forget about him...
  
  

  i dunno why this is happening.
  too many questions, all left unanswered.
  i know i have done no wrong.
  i dunno what he is avoiding...
  
  i.c.y
• the Bear

  24 Oct 04, 12:52

  again, from surface, it would seem that he's going to be afraid of shadows....
  
  i guess it's best to just forget about everything?
  
  i wish you well.. i gotta go to work now...
  
  just thinking aloud.. if i were there, i'd probably bash him
  
  

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  i dunno why this is happening.
  too many questions, all left unanswered.
  i know i have done no wrong.
  i dunno what he is avoiding...
  
  i.c.y

• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 12:56

  Originally posted by the Bear:

  again, from surface, it would seem that he's going to be afraid of shadows....
  
  i guess it's best to just forget about everything?
  
  i wish you well.. i gotta go to work now...
  
  just thinking aloud.. if i were there, i'd probably bash him
  
  

  thanks Bear.
  I do think he needs a good beating too.
  He usually comments on my blog, and then today a stupid idiot went there and said something about 'scandal between us' and now he stopped going to my blog oledi.
  Gah! I can't believe there are such coward!
  
  i.c.y
• shaunlaw

  24 Oct 04, 15:14

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  what do I do with a guy who is so shy he will just clam up whenever there are people gossiping about us? I have no idea why he is so afraid of rumors. He used to spend with me and now he is avoiding me and when I asked him why, he hinted it is because people are talking. So I said...let them talk lor. Then he said cannot, must find a way to stop this gossip. I think people must have found out about our date the other day, and basically now everyone we know suddenly seem to know about us going out, even though it is only once. I dunno what to think about this. Grr
  
  i.c.y

  I think that guy needs to eat bear guts. I mean what is so scary abt being said by others. Who in this world hasnt been criticised or said by others b4?? What a coward he is. There is nth going on so whats there to be afraid of?? Mayb what people said are meant to be jokes, so is he goin to take things so seriously?? Weird guy.
• ditzy

  24 Oct 04, 15:20

  Are you kiddin'? They absolutely love it, just as long as they're not the topic.
• SnowFlag

  24 Oct 04, 15:20

  i dun think it shd be classified as gossip in the 1st place.
  
  Cos it is normal that those who care abt u, ask abt these things.
  
  Ruo Yao Ren Bu Zi, Chu Fei Zi Mo Wei
• BrUtUs

  24 Oct 04, 15:20

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  what do I do with a guy who is so shy he will just clam up whenever there are people gossiping about us? I have no idea why he is so afraid of rumors. He used to spend with me and now he is avoiding me and when I asked him why, he hinted it is because people are talking. So I said...let them talk lor. Then he said cannot, must find a way to stop this gossip. I think people must have found out about our date the other day, and basically now everyone we know suddenly seem to know about us going out, even though it is only once. I dunno what to think about this. Grr
  
  i.c.y

  tink he is interested in other gals, so he afraid tis gossip might affect his chances...
• mahai102

  24 Oct 04, 16:25

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  what do I do with a guy who is so shy he will just clam up whenever there are people gossiping about us? I have no idea why he is so afraid of rumors. He used to spend with me and now he is avoiding me and when I asked him why, he hinted it is because people are talking. So I said...let them talk lor. Then he said cannot, must find a way to stop this gossip. I think people must have found out about our date the other day, and basically now everyone we know suddenly seem to know about us going out, even though it is only once. I dunno what to think about this. Grr
  
  i.c.y

  ask him to die lah...looks like u need a good shagging to help u tide over things...
• edLow

  24 Oct 04, 17:00

  sometime gossip might be very irriating actually.
  imagine being make fun for the whole day in sch or work.
  
  as for me, i wont really bother lor. they wanna say.. say lor.. but i will restrict my words n action when i see the girl ard. so tat they wont find any new topics to make fun of me. hahahaa...
  
  maybe u should ask him why.. confront him if required.. like wat many others say.. maybe he has someone else in mind. well if he do, i guess u noe wat u should do ba.
• Devil1976

  24 Oct 04, 17:01

  Originally posted by icyprincess:

  thanks Bear.
  I do think he needs a good beating too.
  He usually comments on my blog, and then today a stupid idiot went there and said something about 'scandal between us' and now he stopped going to my blog oledi.
  Gah! I can't believe there are such coward!
  
  i.c.y

  Some people are just not so used to gossips and such (especially so for guys?). And hence, they might be more sensitive to it? Afterall, he probably thinks that he don't want any trouble before he even start off in a relationship if you?
  
  Well... Talk to him about it? No matter what, there're probably bound to be bits of gossips here and there.. Whether you know it or not....? And don't expect any less trouble? This is ONLY the BEGINNING... Does he expect all 'SMOOTH SAILING' in a relationship? Ask him, is he gonna be turning around and run off at 1st sight of trouble when things go WRONG...?
  
  Unless he's not really serious about you, he should really DO SOME THINKING about IT...? Or maybe he's just inexperienced?
• icyprincess

  24 Oct 04, 17:30

  Originally posted by Devil1976:

  Some people are just not so used to gossips and such (especially so for guys?). And hence, they might be more sensitive to it? Afterall, he probably thinks that he don't want any trouble before he even start off in a relationship if you?
  
  Well... Talk to him about it? No matter what, there're probably bound to be bits of gossips here and there.. Whether you know it or not....? And don't expect any less trouble? This is ONLY the BEGINNING... Does he expect all 'SMOOTH SAILING' in a relationship? Ask him, is he gonna be turning around and run off at 1st sight of trouble when things go WRONG...?
  
  Unless he's not really serious about you, he should really DO SOME THINKING about IT...? Or maybe he's just inexperienced?

  super inexperienced i wud say.
  i dunno what he is thinking.
  and i m too lazy to keep on trying to find out.
  so if he is serious, i will let him make the move.
  if not, i will forget him as time goes by.
  
  i.c.y
• pete98

  24 Oct 04, 18:14

  Why is he so worry about gossip? What could be so bad about two of you having a relatinship? Go out together is not allowed is it? I also got a lot of people gossiping about me in my company about my r/s with a Indian girl(in case any 1 wondering, I'm a Chinese) what. But so what, I still talking to her in the company and even asking her out once. Spend a whole afternoon at orchard cafe chatting. Granted we did not admit we are a couple but its obvious theres someting going on. I also a very shy person who blushes easily when tease by girls. But I realize that if you really like someone strong enough, views of others really not matters much. Although I do hate some of the terms(slightly racist) people use to describe her