How to deal with a modern, well educated singapore girls??
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seriously.. ur dog is so so cute..
reminds me of sparky from starhub advert.. it's a jack russel?? -
haha... thks to all those who responsed positively to the sub...
Sometimes, I asked myself why dont i just after go after the gal i like... something jus popped up and say "hey, u sure u want to make this move?"
Seriously, I'm not rich, no car, etc... and it takes time to build them up....
i think they know but some just cant wait... There are others who wants expensive as gifts such as a video cam as a brithday present (omg! 
) some gals even like to boast how many "dumb dumb" are on their "waiting list".... hahahha...
Communcation is another thing i dont understand... i'm always doing the talking, about my life, wat i hv been thru, my philosophy of life, sch, workplace stories, etc.... i'm trying to see for signal from the other side if i'm too boring/lame/corny watever but they jus smile and smile and simle... i dont have achievements to boast or neither fastantic stories to say.... so i dont know wat's wrong.... Big sisters, can share wif me wat actually can arouse a conversation wif an opp sex?? -
I'm not a sister, but I'll just reply anyway.....Originally posted by nypsteven:haha... thks to all those who responsed positively to the sub...
Sometimes, I asked myself why dont i just after go after the gal i like... something jus popped up and say "hey, u sure u want to make this move?"
Seriously, I'm not rich, no car, etc... and it takes time to build them up.... i think they know but some just cant wait... There are others who wants expensive as gifts such as a video cam as a brithday present (omg! ) some gals even like to boast how many "dumb dumb" are on their "waiting list".... hahahha...
Communcation is another thing i dont understand... i'm always doing the talking, about my life, wat i hv been thru, my philosophy of life, sch, workplace stories, etc.... i'm trying to see for signal from the other side if i'm too boring/lame/corny watever but they jus smile and smile and simle... i dont have achievements to boast or neither fastantic stories to say.... so i dont know wat's wrong.... Big sisters, can share wif me wat actually can arouse a conversation wif an opp sex??
Some of the girls you dated don't seem very modern or educated leh. Or maybe they don't wanna talk and only want sex, I don't know.
Ok, seriously, if you keep talking about yourself, they may misunderstand that you're self-centered and only interested in yourself. So ask about them - many people need prompting to open up. Asking about them shows that you have some interest in knowing about them too (but of course don't ask for fun lah, be sincere). Ask and you shall receive.
Just pray that you don't encounter the monosyllable (almost) person, like I have:
Me: What shall we have for lunch?
She: Depends.
Me: Depends on what?
She: Depends lor. See how. You decide.
Me: What don't you eat then?
She: Anything lor.
Me: In that case, let go for French food
(OK, actually I said chicken rice).
She: Don't want lah.
Me: OK, then we eat western food.
She: *quiet*
Me: You like noodles?
She: Can also.
Me: OK, we eat noodles.
She: Don't feel like leh.
Me: Don't eat lah. Lets go to bed instead.
She: OK!
(This last part is just a fantasy - it didn't happen) -
might wanna try diverting the thread of conversation to the girl(s) instead of talking about yourself? ;p should work better.Originally posted by nypsteven:haha... thks to all those who responsed positively to the sub...
Sometimes, I asked myself why dont i just after go after the gal i like... something jus popped up and say "hey, u sure u want to make this move?"
Seriously, I'm not rich, no car, etc... and it takes time to build them up.... i think they know but some just cant wait... There are others who wants expensive as gifts such as a video cam as a brithday present (omg! ) some gals even like to boast how many "dumb dumb" are on their "waiting list".... hahahha...
Communcation is another thing i dont understand... i'm always doing the talking, about my life, wat i hv been thru, my philosophy of life, sch, workplace stories, etc.... i'm trying to see for signal from the other side if i'm too boring/lame/corny watever but they jus smile and smile and simle... i dont have achievements to boast or neither fastantic stories to say.... so i dont know wat's wrong.... Big sisters, can share wif me wat actually can arouse a conversation wif an opp sex?? -
Me: What shall we have for lunch?
She: Depends.
Me: Depends on what?
She: Depends lor. See how. You decide.
Me: What don't you eat then?
She: Anything lor.
Me: In that case, let go for French food (OK, actually I said chicken rice).
She: Don't want lah.
Me: OK, then we eat western food.
She: *quiet*
Me: You like noodles?
She: Can also.
Me: OK, we eat noodles.
She: Don't feel like leh.
SUggested line
You: Ok lor u buy
or
You: ok then dont eat lets go backOriginally posted by gentlerock:I'm not a sister, but I'll just reply anyway.....
Some of the girls you dated don't seem very modern or educated leh. Or maybe they don't wanna talk and only want sex, I don't know.
Ok, seriously, if you keep talking about yourself, they may misunderstand that you're self-centered and only interested in yourself. So ask about them - many people need prompting to open up. Asking about them shows that you have some interest in knowing about them too (but of course don't ask for fun lah, be sincere). Ask and you shall receive.
Just pray that you don't encounter the monosyllable (almost) person, like I have:
Me: What shall we have for lunch?
She: Depends.
Me: Depends on what?
She: Depends lor. See how. You decide.
Me: What don't you eat then?
She: Anything lor.
Me: In that case, let go for French food (OK, actually I said chicken rice).
She: Don't want lah.
Me: OK, then we eat western food.
She: *quiet*
Me: You like noodles?
She: Can also.
Me: OK, we eat noodles.
She: Don't feel like leh.
Me: Don't eat lah. Lets go to bed instead.
She: OK!
(This last part is just a fantasy - it didn't happen) -
haha..... that sounds like my relationship with my bf only there's a role reversal. get him to make a decision of any sort is like squeezing blood from stone. alamak...... all his answers to my questions are "anything also can" or "I dunno. You choose, I will go". What a doormat! There's gentlemanly (my gerfrens say that he is) and there's doormat (my male frens say he got no balls). can't win
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Having $ or car or whatever don't guarantee any success.Originally posted by nypsteven:haha... thks to all those who responsed positively to the sub...
Sometimes, I asked myself why dont i just after go after the gal i like... something jus popped up and say "hey, u sure u want to make this move?"
Seriously, I'm not rich, no car, etc... and it takes time to build them up.... i think they know but some just cant wait... There are others who wants expensive as gifts such as a video cam as a brithday present (omg! ) some gals even like to boast how many "dumb dumb" are on their "waiting list".... hahahha...
Communcation is another thing i dont understand... i'm always doing the talking, about my life, wat i hv been thru, my philosophy of life, sch, workplace stories, etc.... i'm trying to see for signal from the other side if i'm too boring/lame/corny watever but they jus smile and smile and simle... i dont have achievements to boast or neither fastantic stories to say.... so i dont know wat's wrong.... Big sisters, can share wif me wat actually can arouse a conversation wif an opp sex??
Having these might make you question if the girl really want you or the $ or car.
Communication is what you didn't get. As i said, it is not monologue which is exactly what you engaged in thus she will loose interest to even talk to you. Talk as in have a conversation, not you talk she listen. You guys must be talking about a common topic. Don't need to arouse what conversation, just be natural. I had guys who fill every silence with their voice. Others boast about themselves. Next are a bunch who was trying to look for sugar mummy, then there was this mommy boy who wanted a maid. How do I know all this? These men talk too much about themselves.
Whatever it is, it cannot be taught over some site and reading typed words. It requires fundamental change in the mental models about talk in the male mind. Men think talking is exchanging info, boosting egos and such. Women think its a form of shareing, emotional attachment. These 2 arrive from different points of view. in addition, if a guy really want to learn, he has to learn how to adapt his conversation style. Any such form of so call "learning" is in the form of coaching... forums are not the best ways to do this. Last of all you must be sincere. -
I dunno I think sometimes making mudane decisions like what to eat is a choreOriginally posted by like2koon:haha..... that sounds like my relationship with my bf only there's a role reversal. get him to make a decision of any sort is like squeezing blood from stone. alamak...... all his answers to my questions are "anything also can" or "I dunno. You choose, I will go". What a doormat! There's gentlemanly (my gerfrens say that he is) and there's doormat (my male frens say he got no balls). can't win 
What my husband and I do on who decides what to eat is that we make a game out of it. Depends on who goes, " You decide" first. -
your problem lies in the title itself. read it and tell me what's wrong.Originally posted by nypsteven:Inpsire by the thread "what do you dislike about singaporean girls?", i must admit singapore gals are a tough load to handle..... not only (most) they are financial-independent, they can make their own decisions....
I'm not trying to suan any ladies in anyway but i really have a problem of understanding ur species..... tell us guys wat actually u ladies feel about us, disklike us abt wat... etc etc....
Be fair to both sides so that we can learn something at the end of the day... hahaha... (lame??) -
dont like that lah... juz trying to learn mah... something may go a bit haywire lah....Originally posted by HENG@:your problem lies in the title itself. read it and tell me what's wrong.
sorry to all ppl who replied but i still dont understand what u ppl are getting at (- the rubbish!!)
anymore voices i can hear from?? -
the problem is that they are well educated while you, you can use "a" with "girls".Originally posted by nypsteven:dont like that lah... juz trying to learn mah... something may go a bit haywire lah....
sorry to all ppl who replied but i still dont understand what u ppl are getting at (- the rubbish!!)
anymore voices i can hear from??
tell me. how many girls do u mean when u say "a girls"?
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about myself 1st:
i am well eduacated, professional degree sponsored overseas. going for a postgrad diploma and a masters. but i dont know if u call me modern. but i am confirm a singaporean girl. i have got a good new car an impreza, a pretty good decent salary abt 3k a month, am 23 this year. i like sports particularly running, cooking. am funny, alright looking and have an indpt streak.
how i would like to be treated on a date:
am not too particular abt who's paying for it. but i cant stand guys who are very insistent on paying esp when they are broke. y cant u just relax and let her pick up the tab for once and offer to pay another time (assuring yourself the next date).
i like guys who can talk about their jobs with a passion, talk about other cheem topics like ethics and pollitics (i actually met one guy like that).
no touchy stuff please esp on a first date. and definite no are your previous sexual conquests and what nots.
so long as u are pretty decent and can talk about stuff other then yourself, it should be alright. no tv shows or movies stuff cos that i feel is a little shallow. shows that u just do nothing but watch tv.
my ideal guy:
actually i met him but i dont think he is interested. he is everything i described above. but i guess i am not too ideal for him.
i want someone who can give me a sense of security.
what i would expect:
i wouldnt mind having kids and getting married and all that stuff. even quitting my job to stay home, cos i think kids should be looked after by parents not maids. but this is provided the financial situation allows it. would want a high powered career as i did not spend all that time in university just to get married. but i figure that can wait. esp until kids reach a certain age.
so really whats so difficult about dealing with a modern well educated singaporean girl. guys just need to mature a little. and be a little more gentlemenly with fewer swear words. -
well if he can't differenciate between singular and plural i don't think he's really capable of communicating properly
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u know I've always thought cooking was pretty fun, but I never really thought of it as a sport? Then again, there is such a thing called competitive cooking.Originally posted by rubic:about myself 1st:
i am well eduacated, professional degree sponsored overseas. going for a postgrad diploma and a masters. but i dont know if u call me modern. but i am confirm a singaporean girl. i have got a good new car an impreza, a pretty good decent salary abt 3k a month, am 23 this year. i like sports particularly running, cooking. am funny, alright looking and have an indpt streak.
how i would like to be treated on a date:
am not too particular abt who's paying for it. but i cant stand guys who are very insistent on paying esp when they are broke. y cant u just relax and let her pick up the tab for once and offer to pay another time (assuring yourself the next date).
i like guys who can talk about their jobs with a passion, talk about other cheem topics like ethics and pollitics (i actually met one guy like that).
no touchy stuff please esp on a first date. and definite no are your previous sexual conquests and what nots.
so long as u are pretty decent and can talk about stuff other then yourself, it should be alright. no tv shows or movies stuff cos that i feel is a little shallow. shows that u just do nothing but watch tv.
my ideal guy:
actually i met him but i dont think he is interested. he is everything i described above. but i guess i am not too ideal for him.
i want someone who can give me a sense of security.
what i would expect:
i wouldnt mind having kids and getting married and all that stuff. even quitting my job to stay home, cos i think kids should be looked after by parents not maids. but this is provided the financial situation allows it. would want a high powered career as i did not spend all that time in university just to get married. but i figure that can wait. esp until kids reach a certain age.
so really whats so difficult about dealing with a modern well educated singaporean girl. guys just need to mature a little. and be a little more gentlemenly with fewer swear words. -
don't be mean. he is just "a boys"Originally posted by vito_corleone:well if he can't differenciate between singular and plural i don't think he's really capable of communicating properly -
ok. as my nick suggests, i'm just a girl here.
I'm turning 23. Enjoying my simple admin job with an extremely fantastic environment and colleagues. I just started doing a part time degree at SIM (this part sux to the core). I don't drive - I don't trust myself to.
My boyfriend is still in NS and will be out thie mid-year. He's got a diploma and intends to get a degree. He just started riding his bike.
Most of the time, I realise I do the talking. He also tries to make me decide on the mundane "Where/What to eat?" questions. Much as I feel that a meaningful conversation about ethics and politics is highly engaging, I would not go so far as to say that talking about movies and entertainment is shallow. (You can even call it the Arts so it ain't so shallow. haahha!)
I feel that talking about anything you are passionate about is a sign that you feel. Now that's good for me. Be it sports, gaming, whatever... as long as it doesn't totally engulf your entire life(style), I think it can be a good thing. I wouldn't want to go out with someone who didn't even know what were the movies in the theatres now! Now THAT's scary.
But maybe i'm just not that "highly educated"? Or I'm just not so inclined to the "finer things in life". I am pretty much the "traditional" girl I guess. I was brought up that way. My sis turned out different but hey, somehow I stand by my way. I enjoy talking about anything from pop stars' gossip to musicals; newsy topics and ethics... I'm not very well-read so yes, obviously there's a limit to what I will talk about. But I enjoy it. 'cos my fundamentals in life are family and friends. Everything else is too secondary to bother about.
Like I said... I'm "traditional".. perhaps abit too traditional and optimistic for this world/singapore. -
One word for all of this~
Guys don't have balls~
Girls don't have dick~
Agree? -
to spare you the agony of having be blissfully unawareOriginally posted by nypsteven:dont like that lah... juz trying to learn mah... something may go a bit haywire lah....
sorry to all ppl who replied but i still dont understand what u ppl are getting at (- the rubbish!!)
anymore voices i can hear from??
Your opening comments has already insulted many ladies in that and its a direct pointer that men are inadequate to handle women. It seems to point to women as a problem through the word "deal" and lay the blame on that source but you are condescending enough to learn ways to get the opposite sex for your own motive.
However, as this is one possible perspective and some people might see your message this way. -
sorry to all ladies and gentlemen who i've unintentionally offended... english still not powerful enough to convince ppl that i'm trying to listen and learn from others......Originally posted by mistyblue:to spare you the agony of having be blissfully unaware
Your opening comments has already insulted many ladies in that and its a direct pointer that men are inadequate to handle women. It seems to point to women as a problem through the word "deal" and lay the blame on that source but you are condescending enough to learn ways to get the opposite sex for your own motive.
However, as this is one possible perspective and some people might see your message this way.
sianz liao...hiaz...
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try using less singlish like "sianz" and "liaoz".Originally posted by nypsteven:sorry to all ladies and gentlemen who i've unintentionally offended... english still not powerful enough to convince ppl that i'm trying to listen and learn from others......
sianz liao...hiaz...