My steady boyfriend gave me HIV
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ST , Aug 28, 2006
My steady boyfriend gave me HIV
Youths here are at risk as they assume that those in the same social circles make 'safe' sex partners
By Tania Tan & Debbie Yong
ALICIA, 19, does not attend wild parties, drink or smoke.
She is not promiscuous and has been faithful to her boyfriend of two years.
But she recently found out that she is HIV-positive.
Alicia is devastated and bitter that she contracted the virus despite being a 'good' girl.
'I didn't do anything wrong. I had sex only with my boyfriend,' said the shy junior college student.
She had no reason to suspect her boyfriend was infected with the virus which causes Aids. A fellow student, he is clean-cut, sober and studies hard.
'He got the virus before he met me,' said Alicia of her now ex-boyfriend.
'He didn't know.'
She assumed that, because he looked safe and came from the same social circle, he would be clean.
Several young Singaporeans that YouthInk spoke to feel the same way.
National University of Singapore undergraduate Y.X. Lim, 23, said: 'I would assume that people in university are more conscious of the consequences of their actions.'
She, too, has unprotected sex with her boyfriend of two years.
Nanyang Technological University student J.L. Tan, 21, said: 'With steady partners, sex is always unprotected. I assume that my girlfriend cares about me enough to be honest about her sexual history.'
But, as Alicia's example proves, it can be extremely dangerous to take it for granted that one's partner is free of sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
Alicia said: 'You don't have to sleep around to get infected...it could happen in an 'exclusive' relationship, too.'
Her boyfriend had multiple partners before meeting her, often engaging in casual sex.
Earlier this month, the Government revealed that there was a three-fold increase in STI cases - including gonorrhoea, genital herpes and warts - among youths aged 10 to 19 from 2002 to 2004.
And more than 40 Singaporeans aged 19 and younger were diagnosed as HIV-positive by the end of last year.
A survey of 500 youths conducted in 2003/2004 by charity Action For Aids (AFA) found that 25 per cent of them were sexually active.
In 2002, the Ministry of Education introduced the Growing Years Series, which addresses sexuality and targets students from the upper primary to junior college levels.
In 2004, the Health Promotion Board introduced an STI/HIV programme.
Both emphasise abstinence.
Mr Justin Ng, founder of the AFA's Youth Outreach Programme, said that although sex education has been ramped up in recent years, the focus is slightly off target.
The 'safe sex is no sex' message does not appear to be working as more young people here are having sex.
The focus should rather be on convincing youth to understand the risk of Aids and STIs, he said.
'Most people believe that if they run around within their usual social circles, they're safe from infection.'
Mr Vanan Julian Pillay, programme executive for HIV Education and Training, a group which works to increase Aids awareness, added: 'STIs, including Aids, are diseases which don't strike only a certain group of people. They can affect anyone, whatever their social, educational or economic standing.'
He said even couples who are in long-term relationships ought to keep practising safe sex. If they want to do away with the protection, they should both get tested regularly for STIs.
'Trust no one.'
Alicia, who is preparing for her A levels, made the easy mistake of trusting her partner.
Now her doctor tells her that, with proper care, she should be able to live the next five to 10 years with 'no major health problems'.
She is 'taking life one day at a time'.
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evil men!
poor girl.
sex is evil!
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Sadly not the first time I've heard about such cases.
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really?Originally posted by JennTS:Sadly not the first time I've heard about such cases. -
Poor thing.. How come 10 year-olds can kena STIs?
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See this the result of not seeking for a virgin.
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Poor thing.... I hate unfaithful people!!!
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Yea....it was mentioned in the newspaper once, about this couple who had been married for a few years. Unfortunately when the wife went overseas because of her work, her husband went to find a prostitute and got AIDS, and passed it on to his wife.Originally posted by JennTS:Sadly not the first time I've heard about such cases. 
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You get babies from sex(apart from artificial inseminaton).Originally posted by missqi:evil men!
poor girl.
sex is evil!
We were once babies.
We are all evil!
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trust no one.
thrust no one. -
suay lo.... most probably the bf went geylang....
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after 10 yr wat will happen? die ah?
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problem abt teenagers nowadays..
so curious, everything also wana try..
now strike 4D liao. -
Originally posted by browniebaobao:problem abt teenagers nowadays..
so curious, everything also wana try..
now strike 4D liao. ...
notti ma.
no tio no scare. -
awwwww, poor girl-girl.
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see la. kana le den cry.
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so ke lian that gal, then her bf stil dumped her. so poor and sad. how she going to live or cope? her future all gone liao. can prepare for funeral liao. to hell for those unfaithful or promiscuous one.
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thankfully, baba.Originally posted by Kuali Baba:You get babies from sex(apart from artificial inseminaton).
We were once babies.
We are all evil!
i am a test-tube baby!
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poor of u
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i feel sad for that gal.... seriously.. wat is the world coming to? 10 yr old kids kena STI... 40 plus cases of HIV positive teenagers aged 19 and below... u dun get that much cases in the past...maybe teenagers nowadaes are weak minded that they fall into the abyss easily?? Is sex that tempting?? I guess the onli defence against such lusts is exactly wat that is lacking in the lives of the new generation of sg - strong moral values...and the will to stick to ur principles of not having sex/praticing safe sex. Seriously, i hope that this news would serve as a warning to all couples that ur partners could very well be hiding the truth from u... The world is changing, from a moral stand point, for the worse.
just my 2 cents worth
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that's just bloody sad..
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That's also mean Bao Ying..
U fucked another woman , then got virus..
And ur beloved got from u...
Fair enough... Only coz of u..
So totally must blame who ? -
Who says sex is evil???Originally posted by missqi:evil men!
poor girl.
sex is evil!
Sex is meant for procreation. And procreation is only allowed in marriage.
Sex is SUPERB lah dey!!!!!
But don't abuse it can liao. -
Gah Men stand to promote not having sex too early to teenagers are sadly out of date. Its time to review all this, from not having sex to promoting safe sex. The science textbook need to be change too. It is only teaching about different between males and females, which i think in today, 10 - 12 years old already knew. In primany school, teachers can teach about the different of male and female. In secondary school, change it so that it can teach what you can use to prevent yourself from getting STD or preg. We can never stop the teenagers from having sex. Its not the 80s or 90s now, when the people thinking is still conservative. People thinking change over the years, but the gah men thinking never change for the past 40 years.
Parents do play a big part too, but some parents do only know how to push all this teaching to the school, when in fact, the school are not teaching it the right way.
My 2 cents worth
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Folks just to update.
Getting infected with HIV is not a death sentence in that it can be controlled.
Unfortunately, there are many medications to take and comes up to thousands of dollars a month - equal to dialysis treatments probably.
When I was in Medical residency in the US in early 2001, there were many patients suffering the complications of HIV infection which is Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndromes, particularly opportunistic infections - PCP, Toxoplasma, etc. all fairly easily controlled with antibiotic prophylaxis.
With the advent of HAART (Highly Active Anti-Retroviral Therapy), I saw the number of such cases fall rapidly over 3 years.
The medical center I worked in was a major NIH-funded HIV research center. Most patients will have medications funded by private health insurance, medicare, or medicaid (for very poor or disabled). Also, because it was a major research center, many drugs companies would be performing clinical trials and thus, many medications would be funded through them. Therefore, there was NO-ONE who had HIV infection who could not get treatment!!!
That aside, EDUCATION on unprotected sex, barrier methods of contraception are needed to halt the spread of disease.
Also, better funding of HIV treatment is required, with better health insurance coverage or funding sources so that Singaporean patients can also enjoy medical care that equals those enjoyed by citizens of other industrialized societies. Once the drug companies know that there's money to be made (ie, people will pay for treatment); more money gets poured into research, and then more gets funded for studies, especially in Singapore, and ultimately, Singaporeans benefit.