virginity
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well...
but have to spare a thought for her...
since she's ur wife to be..
why kept bother about her past?
future is more important! -
Doesn't matter to me. Non-virgins are mostly more experienced in bed anyway.
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not encourage ... i dun think anyone encourage anyone to bed their partners before marriage, but more like a freedom of choice....Originally posted by lurve:it seems like people here are encouraging pre-marital sex. is that wat we r thought in school?
If you feel that you wanna wait till marriage to have sex ... well by all means .... no one here is gonna tell you that you are being conservative etc..... but if you are one feel that sex and marriage not necessarily must co exist (eg. you dun marry for sex, you marry for love and commitment. sex is just a physical act of love or whatever the reason maybe) then I guess that you will understand what i'm trying to say in my earlier posts. Whatever it is ... no one gonna judge you for being a virgin or non virgin .... it's your choice, your life and your relationship....
What i was also trying to put across was... if anyone expects his wife to be a wholesome virgin ... he too should save himself for her... well ... simply, if you want a virgin, make sure that yourself is one ... else save all the crap about dun feel comfy that you are not your wife's first.... I guess that's only fair .... Dun you agree ?? Everything just works both ways ... how you think a virgin girl will feel if she knows that she is not her husband first either? Haven't it occur to you that she may also feel uncomfy about it initially?
Education as you mention, teaches you moral values and inpart knowledge, ultimately it's still your choice ... i believe they also teaches you things like use a condem to be safe etc ... all they are just trying to tell you is value your body, dun sleep around and have multiple partners.... abstinace is the best to avoid STDs and unwanted preg ... well it is coz you aren't doing anything at all.... but isn't that a knowledge ...?? it doesn't force or tell you that you MUST do this or that else you are not doing things that are morally correct..... guess we have different views ... it's not how I was eduacated .... I'm very sure my education serves me well. It's a matter of choice ....
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technically it is possible to have sex without tearing the....what is the name of that membrane?. anyway it happens when the penis does not go in deep enuf or the membrane is too thick..
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ALTERNATIVELY ORAL SEX, ANAL SEX PRESERVES VIRGINITY FOR 1ST NIGHT AFTER MARRIAGE...........Originally posted by bismarck:technically it is possible to have sex without tearing the....what is the name of that membrane?. anyway it happens when the penis does not go in deep enuf or the membrane is too thick..
serious -
example:
one hunter can hunt many rabbits. but each rabbit can only be hunted once.
one frog can eat many flies, but each fly can only be eaten once.
one person can buy many new cars. but each new car can only be bought once....thereafter, it can only be sold as old car.
one person can wear many pair of shoes...but each pair of new shoes can only be worn once....thereafter its considered old.
1 carat crystal clear diamond = $10000. | Virgin gal
1 carat diamond with one black particle inside = $1 | Non virgin gal
why a piece of useless stone so expensive???
it is not the cost i am comparing.....its the value and dignity....
anyway....sure will have ppl condemning this reply....hope u gals understand wat i am trying to say. -
yes unfortunately i have to condemn your reply. because you are demeaning the female species again with the same comparison to material things. as well as the fact that you simply went to the idea that the female has to be the flies to the frog, the rabbit to the hunter, the car to the man, the prey to the predator. a totally subserviant and inferior status to the dominant and superior status of man.Originally posted by Jaws:example:
one hunter can hunt many rabbits. but each rabbit can only be hunted once.
one frog can eat many flies, but each fly can only be eaten once.
one person can buy many new cars. but each new car can only be bought once....thereafter, it can only be sold as old car.
one person can wear many pair of shoes...but each pair of new shoes can only be worn once....thereafter its considered old.
1 carat crystal clear diamond = $10000. | Virgin gal
1 carat diamond with one black particle inside = $1 | Non virgin gal
why a piece of useless stone so expensive???
it is not the cost i am comparing.....its the value and dignity....
anyway....sure will have ppl condemning this reply....hope u gals understand wat i am trying to say.
But i would just like to know, does your words hold water for a woman marrying a non-virgin man? That that non-virgin man is a fly that has been eaten, a diamond ring not worth his value? shouldn't such theories work both ways ? unless of course, you do not believe in the notion of gender equality. -
Who cares if one is virgin or not if u really love tat guy/gal. Who cares about the pass when u can embrace the present and look forward to the future. Ya??
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Who cares if one is virgin or not if u really love tat guy/gal. Who cares about the pass when u can embrace the present and look forward to the future. Ya??
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You seem very particular about equality and.....about not comparing women to material status. Simple analogies are made with perhaps little or no particular implications yet you almost flame such replies as if they were a personal insult to you.Originally posted by unwantedgal:yes unfortunately i have to condemn your reply. because you are demeaning the female species again with the same comparison to material things. as well as the fact that you simply went to the idea that the female has to be the flies to the frog, the rabbit to the hunter, the car to the man, the prey to the predator. a totally subserviant and inferior status to the dominant and superior status of man.
But i would just like to know, does your words hold water for a woman marrying a non-virgin man? That that non-virgin man is a fly that has been eaten, a diamond ring not worth his value? shouldn't such theories work both ways ? unless of course, you do not believe in the notion of gender equality.
Why is that so?
And why be so defensive?
You have always prompted and led the discussion and yet you divulge no information of your own. Would you share some of your opinions instead?
Peace -
i value my virginity too .. so i hope she will ...Originally posted by unwantedgal:do guys still value virginity? would you give up your girlfriend over that? how can you tell if she is still a virgin? can a doctor really see that you are one, or is he merely inspecting your hymen? if hymen can be torn through vigourous sports, what can of sports are we talking about? is it possible that the first time you had sexual intercourse, no blood resulted? -
Gender equality........ scrap the women's charter, then we talk.Originally posted by unwantedgal:yes unfortunately i have to condemn your reply. because you are demeaning the female species again with the same comparison to material things. as well as the fact that you simply went to the idea that the female has to be the flies to the frog, the rabbit to the hunter, the car to the man, the prey to the predator. a totally subserviant and inferior status to the dominant and superior status of man.
But i would just like to know, does your words hold water for a woman marrying a non-virgin man? That that non-virgin man is a fly that has been eaten, a diamond ring not worth his value? shouldn't such theories work both ways ? unless of course, you do not believe in the notion of gender equality. -
From her previous posts it is most likely that she had sex before, broke off with that fella for some reason, met a guy she really liked but who unfortunately for her values virginity in his partner. Thus, she comes here to look for people with the opinion that virginity doesn't in fact matter and a guy who rejects a girl based on her past is an arsehole.Originally posted by Werewolf:You seem very particular about equality and.....about not comparing women to material status. Simple analogies are made with perhaps little or no particular implications yet you almost flame such replies as if they were a personal insult to you.
Why is that so?
And why be so defensive?
You have always prompted and led the discussion and yet you divulge no information of your own. Would you share some of your opinions instead?
Peace
This would explain why she's so uptight about posts which highlight that girls that are non-virgins are not worth the effort. Mr Jaws unfortunately, put himself in the line of fire with his comments which may be perfectly legitimate, but do not go well with her.
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very true reply. maybe our conservative society is putting too much emphasis into virginity. while it is important to a certain extent, we must look at things at another angle. if an intact hymen is so important, how about a chaste girl who accidentally torn her hymen while dancing or another who got raped. or a girl who has a super thick hymen which refused to be torn even after so many rounds of intercourse.
things are pretty superficial at times. it depends on what the individual thinks. besides, love is so wei da. u can't possibly forsake a girl you loved so much just because she's not a virgin, isn't it. besides, people do make stupid mistakes at times. human nature.Originally posted by Jaws:example:
one hunter can hunt many rabbits. but each rabbit can only be hunted once.
one frog can eat many flies, but each fly can only be eaten once.
one person can buy many new cars. but each new car can only be bought once....thereafter, it can only be sold as old car.
one person can wear many pair of shoes...but each pair of new shoes can only be worn once....thereafter its considered old.
1 carat crystal clear diamond = $10000. | Virgin gal
1 carat diamond with one black particle inside = $1 | Non virgin gal
why a piece of useless stone so expensive???
it is not the cost i am comparing.....its the value and dignity....
anyway....sure will have ppl condemning this reply....hope u gals understand wat i am trying to say. -
when i look for the other half to live the rest of my life with, some of my key considerations will be her moral values, mental maturity and honesty. that's when the question of virginity comes in.
since alot of non-sex related activities can damage the hymen, i wouldn't place much emphasis on it. but i really hope that she can be honest with me about her virginity. -
we have a feminist here. lolz. relac unwantedgal, everyone has their own views. personally i would like my girl to be a virgin. but i dun mind a non virgin so long as she doesn't cheat on me. even once will be non tolerable. guys are less forgiving than girls in this area i guess.
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aiyah....nah beh....
if virgin not important, den all give me lah....
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alright. this whole discussion is getting a little too heated. i'm sure no one is saying that a girl or a guy should be giving their virginity away just like that. similarly, i don't think that what they are advocating is promiscuity. if two people are in love, and are responsible i.e. are not rash, it really is up to them what they decide. of course, i don't think that really young 'kids' should be doing it - for one, it's statutory rape as long as the girl is below the age of 16; for another, they just are not mature enough at that age to make such decisions. i mean, you guys have to think about whether you are prepared to support the girl or marry her should she get pregnant.
and yes, girls will mind in a way that their bfs are not virgins, but as long as they are really in love, it doesn't matter that much. of course, it's not a nice thought to have that your bf's been around the block a few times, but as long as he's not cheating on you, and really loves and cares about you, the past shouldn't matter so much. if you are so hung up on a person's past, you'll be unable to see how they've grown from those experiences. for all you know, they may regret having done those things. it's not fair to condemn them for mistakes committed in youth. ("ah, the folly of youth") you end up blinding yourself to who the person really is right now.
as for the fear of getting STDs and all that, that's what protection is for. it's not 100% fool-proof though, and that's why going for regular check ups is important. -
actualli got abit experience is quite a gd thing lei.. LOLOriginally posted by shandower:Doesn't matter to me. Non-virgins are mostly more experienced in bed anyway. -
yoz jaws!
example:
1 BMW M series = $300000. | Virgin guy
1 BMW M series with faulty engine = $1 | Non virgin guy
why a piece of metal so expensive???
it is not the cost i am comparing.....its the value and dignity....
anyway....sure will have ppl condemning this reply....hope a disgustingly narrow minded person like you would understand wat i am trying to say.
woe to the gal who so suay has to say "i do" to you. -
is an ex-convict of no value to society? however one should remain a virgin till well after marriage. also, the haste in which the guy nakes in losing his virginity after marriage reflects poorly on his intents
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you've just speak my mind !! ... way to go ....Originally posted by I am a Clone:yoz jaws!
example:
1 BMW M series = $300000. | Virgin guy
1 BMW M series with faulty engine = $1 | Non virgin guy
why a piece of metal so expensive???
it is not the cost i am comparing.....its the value and dignity....
anyway....sure will have ppl condemning this reply....hope a disgustingly narrow minded person like you would understand wat i am trying to say.
woe to the gal who so suay has to say "i do" to you. -
awww.... then you won't have a virgin girl to marry in the end ... how ??? that's so sad....Originally posted by Jaws:aiyah....nah beh....
if virgin not important, den all give me lah....
you are still paying that so call thousands for that piece of 1 carat diamond with a black partical in it ... sigh ... what goes around COMES AROUND ... -
frankly ... i believe any independant women would not feel that those were merely simply analogies made with perhaps little or no particular implications, as quoted from you....Originally posted by Werewolf:You seem very particular about equality and.....about not comparing women to material status. Simple analogies are made with perhaps little or no particular implications yet you almost flame such replies as if they were a personal insult to you.
Why is that so?
And why be so defensive?
You have always prompted and led the discussion and yet you divulge no information of your own. Would you share some of your opinions instead?
Peace
it is indeed a very telling statement of how women are regarded in the society. As an equal fellow human being or a mere "thing" in a man's world.... It's really sad to know that such a thought still exist in today's society. -
Originally posted by Werewolf:You seem very particular about equality and.....about not comparing women to material status. Simple analogies are made with perhaps little or no particular implications yet you almost flame such replies as if they were a personal insult to you.
Why is that so?
for this, please refer to springtime's reply. as she mentioned, it is the subconscious imagery that men has of women that i feel an urge to highlight. it is only when this subconscious biasness is highlighted and pointed out then can people understand that yes, they do perhaps view women as lower in status than men. Another thing about scrapping the women's charter. its a bit like the african apartheid situation. you may suddenly proclaim that white men and black men are to have the same status after years of slavery and unequal treatment. But by automatically opening the doors of university and education to the blacks, you have not eradicate the problem. they are still not able to enter coz years of subversion has caused them to think they are inferior to the whites, they are poorly educated and cannot compete on the same level. the quota for female medicine students has just been removed. this year. isn't that still a sign that there is inequality in society?
And why be so defensive?
oh well, but let's stop this whole feminist issue. peace. i was just very taken aback by mr jaws consistent comparision of women to material goods and i felt a need to highlight that subconscious inequality to the public.
You have always prompted and led the discussion and yet you divulge no information of your own. Would you share some of your opinions instead?
wait a minute, you said opinions right? not my factual background right? so i will just answer your question. i think that the world is judged on two things. the intention and the act itself. So if a person is a pervert and has all kinds of sexual thoughts, and have sex because he/she is lustful and cannot control, he/she is a person of lower moral values. If a person had sex frequently with many partners, then the actions tells a lot of his/her character. But if it was not with many and any partner, then he/she shoudln't suffer for it. It is a balance of the intention and the action, takign into account the frequency and the intensity of the elements.
Peace