Originally posted by iceFatboy:
hi,
let me speak from a parent's point of view.
Setting a curfew is hard considering that I was young once and I do enjoy hanging out with my friends, talking just about everything under the skies, sharing our victory stories about our parents, friends or teachers. Those were the days.
but look @ what is out there now. It is like a sea where you can never satisfy its' hunger. There are too many real stories out there that just scare the hell out of every parents.
The one where the gal was kept for a few days and tortured?
The two boys who were dudded the "MacDonalds boys",
The gang fights.
We as parents understand the freedom you desire.
But we are more worried that trouble come to you than for you to make trouble. One wrong look, one wrong move can bring youngsters endless trouble.
Look at Singapore Christmas Party at orchard, I bet many parents would have asked their children not to go, but I bet most went anyway. Then the foul cries of being molest, being in gang fights. No point in "I told you so" stories then, right?
I totally agree that if we, parents were to hand-hold our children, hey, they won't be able to take the knocks of life. They won't know the danger, and most important the consequences of their actions.
Most of teenagers think they are young, they can afford to make mistakes, but hey, one you are marked by the law. This society does not forgive that easily.
However, if a proper framework is establised and trust is establised, then it is easier for parent-child relationship to progress. I was taught that when the child is young, you can correct and if necessary, scold, but once in primary, you need to be their friend, to understand.
Almost all parents wish their child will go forth and grap the stars, achieve greatness, be better in their lives than the parents.
rem the old saying "I eat rice more than...", well, just say that we, parents have been there, done that.
Even though I am a teen, I can understand. Children or teens alike CAN or WILL get in trouble if they do something wrong or mess up something. My mom had always been close with me and I never had any curfew. Coz I dun go to my friends house everyday and I LOVE my home coz I got computer here to play and drive my parents mad about how much time I am wasting on the computer.
When I was in P3, when the REAL projects start shooting, I had to come home before 4pm. Also same for P4 unless I have some valid and reasonable reason. P5 curfew time was 5-6pm and I never once broken it. I do sometimes, but I CALL my parents first and tell them why and what. It is actually very simple for parents and child to communicate. We just have to put in EFFORT and TRY. Even though u think ur parents are control freaks, or just trying to make ur life bad, they LOVE you all the same. If not, ur mom will properly do an abortion. Think. If ur parents didn't bring u in this world, will you HAVE the experience? Will you make friends, have fun...everything! Yes, in the end, we will all die and be gone forever. But you had the EXPERIENCE. Tht is what is most important.
And sometimes, you wish ur mom or dad will be gone from your life. What will happen when they are GONE from ur life? What if you are sick, alone at home, and there is no one? Who is going to take care of you? What if you have a younger sibling? Will you be able to take full responsibility and take good care of her, making sure she don't fall into bad company? Even worse, will you give her a GOOD inflence or a BAD inflence?
I am only 13. Really. I swear. I think you just understand it all better if you been close to ur mom all the time. (But I do think she is a control freak sometimes.)
