where is the justice???
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i would like to ask one qeustion.
Someone accuse you of diao-ing at them when actually you did not, and the person starts spreading rumours about you to everyone which tarnish ones reputation and pride. You cannot confront her because that fella has got powerful backings and you also do not want to make matter worse.
Most importantly, the people she spreads the rumour to believes her and starts to look at you from a different view. What would you do?
Also, the girl have got powerful backings in the sense of a lot of brother bengs and sister lians who have got mouths thats very destructive. What will you do to stop the person from further hurting you? And is it true that teenagers would rather believe rumour than the pure truth?
This happen to one of my friend and is it convenient for me to help her or should i just let her settle herself? -
er..to me i think u cant really do anything..if i were ur fren i would not even bother abt the rumours unless someone personally ask u abt it..then u clarify lor..
i think teens would believe but they wouldnt care much..if ur fren is not some important ppl..
bottomline is..there arent called lians n bengs for nth..so just ignore them lo -
but is best friend. And all these is like happening right before me and when im with her. Like a bit of ignoring her plight if i dont help her...Originally posted by hatemeifuwantto:er..to me i think u cant really do anything..if i were ur fren i would not even bother abt the rumours unless someone personally ask u abt it..then u clarify lor..
i think teens would believe but they wouldnt care much..if ur fren is not some important ppl..
bottomline is..there arent called lians n bengs for nth..so just ignore them lo
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First of all, is ur friend a good friend of yrs? If so, you shouldn't abandon yr friend who is in need of yr support.
I faced that kinda prob in sec sch. Some popular freaks started spreading nasty rumours about me over some jealousy issue. They couldn't take it when I was praised by teachers and my classmates when I became a new student in that sch.
They wrote some untrue rumours in a sch diary and let everyone read. Unfortunately, many ppl shunned me out because they believed on what had been written. I couldn't help myself because I was outnumbered and I had no close friends when I first entered the sch.
I went to the last resort by telling one of the gang's parents about it. It may sound childish but I had nothing to lose. After that, one of the person seemed to apologize indirectly.
For your case, it sounds rather complicated because it involves ah bengs/lians who likes to be involved in gang fights. maybe u should confront the gang's parents too or someone you could trust?? -
teens...
bengs..
damn! -
silly gals..follow them..
regrets..cry... -
kids these days
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after apologising end of story?Originally posted by pokkagreentea:First of all, is ur friend a good friend of yrs? If so, you shouldn't abandon yr friend who is in need of yr support.
I faced that kinda prob in sec sch. Some popular freaks started spreading nasty rumours about me over some jealousy issue. They couldn't take it when I was praised by teachers and my classmates when I became a new student in that sch.
They wrote some untrue rumours in a sch diary and let everyone read. Unfortunately, many ppl shunned me out because they believed on what had been written. I couldn't help myself because I was outnumbered and I had no close friends when I first entered the sch.
I went to the last resort by telling one of the gang's parents about it. It may sound childish but I had nothing to lose. After that, one of the person seemed to apologize indirectly.
For your case, it sounds rather complicated because it involves ah bengs/lians who likes to be involved in gang fights. maybe u should confront the gang's parents too or someone you could trust??
Shis my best friend. I saw their parents in the parents meeting. Same pattern as the stupid chao-ah-lian. Everything also don care. I remembered hearing the teacher asking her mother to like control her daughter more but the mother just say its up to her, i cant do anything.
The others who her kao shan at the back all from normal stream. And i dono anyone frm normal much less to say go up to their parents and report their kids hooligan behaviour.... whatsmore, they are indirectly related to the matter, they are just there to show tt they can fight well. -
my friend have a strong backbone and wont cry on front of others. She will NEVER resort to gaining sympathy. I dont encourage this matter too. I think the bullying will continue.Originally posted by SGpork:silly gals..follow them..
regrets..cry... -
If I am in the same situation, I treat everyone a stick of cigarette and problem solved. Somemore, make friends better than make enemies.
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the very nxt day, police will turn up at my house and pull me to the juvenile court for introducing illegal activities to young children...Originally posted by NUS_Superst@r:If I am in the same situation, I treat everyone a stick of cigarette and problem solved. Somemore, make friends better than make enemies. 
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hello.. bad luck, your friend. it really is up to u to decide whthr it is convenient to help ur friend? cos u know the situation best, like whthr it would get u into any trouble, and whthr u care enuf to stand by her?
but from ur post i reckon tt u have alrdy decided to side with her. howeva since u've mentioned that tis person has got 'powerful backings' u may not want to openly contest the rumor regardin ur friend? mayb u can juz talk to afew other friends (who have heard) about it. u can also try 2 convince others, only when they bring up this issue?
u mentioned 'how to stop.. from further hurting you..' hmm i guess the best way is to draw a line. a line to distinct between those true frens who matter, and 'the others' (mostly those who gossip and backstab u). after tt, do wat u have to do.
1) let e 'true friends' (who hav believed e rumors) noe ur side of e story, n it is up 2 them
2) let e other friends (who hav not heard e rumors yet) 2 noe as well
3) drop those 'others' and forget about them! if they would gossip n spread rumors abt u, they r nt who u wanna be with!
woah, i hope this may help u
whthr or not u decid 2 help ur fren 'settle' tis issue openly, u shld lend ur support 2 her, okay? gd luck.. -
here the justice... ^^
juz kidding... I actually naber had this problem before... sure got small rumors but they fly by so fast they're gone b4 you know it... assure your friend that the rumor will pass...
unless that girl upkeep the rumor, maybe you ask your friend to react to the rumor sarcastically... people are very less likely to believe sarcasm... don't know if it will help though... -
thanks for all advice. But is there any way which i could let them have a taste of their own medicine.
This might not be strongly encourage but i believe in an eye for an eye. -
sue her for defamation....Originally posted by TYING:thanks for all adive. But is there any way which i could let them have a taste of their own medicine.
This might not be strongly encourage but i believe in an eye for an eye.
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Take video or pic of them and send to stomp to shame them.
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lol, even if me and my friend combine our whole fortune together also not enough...Originally posted by MohamedF:sue her for defamation.... -
and land in tan tock seng the next day.Originally posted by NUS_Superst@r:Take video or pic of them and send to stomp to shame them. -
wow, if the parents are like bo-chap then the situation is getting hard to control. Perhaps, you should inform a trusted teacher or a counsellor about this matter. See if they could help you confront the gang.Originally posted by TYING:after apologising end of story?
Shis my best friend. I saw their parents in the parents meeting. Same pattern as the stupid chao-ah-lian. Everything also don care. I remembered hearing the teacher asking her mother to like control her daughter more but the mother just say its up to her, i cant do anything.
The others who her kao shan at the back all from normal stream. And i dono anyone frm normal much less to say go up to their parents and report their kids hooligan behaviour.... whatsmore, they are indirectly related to the matter, they are just there to show tt they can fight well.
after apologizing, the girl (who started the jealousy rumours) became nice to me. But I tried to avoid her as best as I could. The rest of her popular gang slowly became my friends. But again, I tried not to get too close with them. -
be in that situation before.
i just bo chup. if they really want to believe the rumours so be it.
they want to listen to 1 side story than to find out the truth, then these kind of people dun want also no loss to me.
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aeskay's advice is also great.Originally posted by aeskay:hello.. bad luck, your friend. it really is up to u to decide whthr it is convenient to help ur friend? cos u know the situation best, like whthr it would get u into any trouble, and whthr u care enuf to stand by her?
but from ur post i reckon tt u have alrdy decided to side with her. howeva since u've mentioned that tis person has got 'powerful backings' u may not want to openly contest the rumor regardin ur friend? mayb u can juz talk to afew other friends (who have heard) about it. u can also try 2 convince others, only when they bring up this issue?
u mentioned 'how to stop.. from further hurting you..' hmm i guess the best way is to draw a line. a line to distinct between those true frens who matter, and 'the others' (mostly those who gossip and backstab u). after tt, do wat u have to do.
1) let e 'true friends' (who hav believed e rumors) noe ur side of e story, n it is up 2 them
2) let e other friends (who hav not heard e rumors yet) 2 noe as well
3) drop those 'others' and forget about them! if they would gossip n spread rumors abt u, they r nt who u wanna be with!
woah, i hope this may help u whthr or not u decid 2 help ur fren 'settle' tis issue openly, u shld lend ur support 2 her, okay? gd luck.. -
actually ar... if you know what to do, you can minimize the cost... cases like this don't need to go to high court one... the smaller courts can... I can't remember them...Originally posted by TYING:lol, even if me and my friend combine our whole fortune together also not enough...
some more, if you got clear evidence, don't need lawyer one... just show the clear evidence the judge will be convinced...
but don't think it will work one... There is no compensation to case with no damages... -
wah...at least you could turn the tables around.Originally posted by pokkagreentea:wow, if the parents are like bo-chap then the situation is getting hard to control. Perhaps, you should inform a trusted teacher or a counsellor about this matter. See if they could help you confront the gang.
after apologizing, the girl (who started the jealousy rumours) became nice to me. But I tried to avoid her as best as I could. The rest of her popular gang slowly became my friends. But again, I tried not to get too close with them.
Well, we did report the matter to the teacher, and it was like:
Friend and i : Ms XXX, that chao-ah-lian keeps spreading rumours about friend and also causing her reputation to slip downwards. Afterall, she is a student leader and needs some face ma.
Ms XXX: Is it serious?
Friend and i: of course la!
Ms XXX: hmmm, i think its just one of those common stuff la. I will try to resolve this thing.
The issue never resolve.
Went to look fot DM.
DM: YES?
friend and i: We kana (same as above)
DM: oh, ok. we cant really do much abt it. parents will later complain and the school will receive letters which is not good. Maybe you have provoke them. This kind of ppl dont go and bother abt them. Just leave it la k?
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it is justice to make judgment that you seem fit.Originally posted by TYING:i would like to ask one qeustion.
Someone accuse you of diao-ing at them when actually you did not, and the person starts spreading rumours about you to everyone which tarnish ones reputation and pride. You cannot confront her because that fella has got powerful backings and you also do not want to make matter worse.
Most importantly, the people she spreads the rumour to believes her and starts to look at you from a different view. What would you do?
Also, the girl have got powerful backings in the sense of a lot of brother bengs and sister lians who have got mouths thats very destructive. What will you do to stop the person from further hurting you? And is it true that teenagers would rather believe rumour than the pure truth?
This happen to one of my friend and is it convenient for me to help her or should i just let her settle herself?
help her if you can, and if you choose to do so, please don't give up halfway. -
every time like this one, thats why i will try not to get myself implicated into troubles...Originally posted by TYING:The issue never resolve.