diploma and degree
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Sorry guys,
On one side of the things, the girl's mom may seem to be unresonable... But try puting yourself in the shoes of the mother, having to raise a child is not easy and as a parent, Im sure most of you guys would hope that your daughter is in safe hands. Just think about this,
Which parent wishes to see his/her daughter to slog the whole day just to make ends meet?
Therefore, most parents would prefer a guy with a steady income as their prospective son-in-law. Having a good education doesn't gurantee steady income, but its definitely a good start for better things to come!
Just my 2 cents worth..... -
ya lor...thats why I wanna get phD so I can get a phD wifeOriginally posted by Frozen_Throne:Sorry guys,
On one side of the things, the girl's mom may seem to be unresonable... But try puting yourself in the shoes of the mother, having to raise a child is not easy and as a parent, Im sure most of you guys would hope that your daughter is in safe hands. Just think about this,
Which parent wishes to see his/her daughter to slog the whole day just to make ends meet?
Therefore, most parents would prefer a guy with a steady income as their prospective son-in-law. Having a good education doesn't gurantee steady income, but its definitely a good start for better things to come!
Just my 2 cents worth.....
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these are the things to run away for
some parents need to learn things the hard way.Originally posted by collie76:the worse thing is she is going out to see where my gf is, she will even go to her workplace to pick her up, call her at the office many times to make sure that she does not stay late in office, she does not accept the fact that ppl have to stay late in office due to work, she will say what for?
whatever my gf say to her mum, the mum will think that everything my gf said is instigated by me, i got to know my gf from a decent pub and the mum thinks i m a smoker and drunkard .... the mother even suspect my gf of doing drugs, which kinda mum will do such a thing?
now the big problem is everynight my gf goes home to hear the mum go nagging about me and the worse thing is the father sides the mum, imagine this, my gf when she was young, she was not allowed to watch any drama serials but documentaries only and she cannot even shut her own room door due to privacy, the mum will say its her house, why should she close the door??
now my gf tells me that the mum may even come to my place to talk to me, if the mum does so i am sure to give her hell but i cannot do so coz its her mum
my gf was supposed to help out at my neighblur's wedding and my gf mum is against her attending the wedding, she was so rude that she grabbed my gf's phone and spoke to my neighbour's wife saying that my gf cannot make it for the wedding due to her commitment to another wedding which is not true.
i am sad for my gf coz her bday is approaching and she cannot even go out to celebrate, if only i can call some counsellor to go to her house and talk to the mum, i wish i could do something to help my gf -
Her mother's thinking is quite conservative.. abit like my mother but then
u want to marry her and not her mother right? Just prove to her that u can take care of her and love her......there is what most important.... -
over protective liao la. daughter already a wrking adult man. for me, i wuldnt date a person who allows others to control her lidat(until such an age!!!). anyway, i think highly unlikely for the guy to do much if the gal's attitude towards 'being controlled' doesnt change.a lot depends on gal i suppose.
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the worse thing to happen is that i met her at a decent pub and the mum accusses me of being a bad hat , one who drinks and smokes which i dun, the worse thing to happen is she accueses my gf of doing drugs
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well..at least he got his degreeOriginally posted by the_don:hummm.... so far my parents are tolerant of my choices, 'N' level, 'O' level, kicked out of school, undergrads, uni grads, diploma holders, all dated before. as long as they are not bums or crooks, they leave the choice to me. education level is not so important loh, more important is the chemistry. but if u feel that u should upgrade yourself just to suit your gal, go ahead, that's wat one of my guy fren did (btw, he got dump after he got his degree
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all the best ya? -
me in the opposite boat. My parents are like ur gf's mother. They do it because they want the best for me. Unfortunately I now think I am the best for only me. So Single lor...what to do.....Originally posted by collie76:m a diploma holder and i m going out with a degree holder, she seems to accept me for wat i m coz i m a diploma holder but her mum is like belittling me and say i am not gd enough for her
i wonder any of u are in the same boat as me? -
hahhaha... yah.. tell him that and he rolls his eyes. imagine spending
$35K and he is not well to do horOriginally posted by sgFish:well..at least he got his degree -
I mean it happens.... this is life.... something similiar happen to me and my ex last time.... that why we broke up.. how old are you and yr gf.... maybe that way it is be easier... for us to explain as i guess age plays a part...
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i m 28 while she is 22
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Wow my mom have such thinking too. She says that I must minimum get a gf with a diploma so she discourage me from mixing with my companies operators(o-level or less). But I don't really care.
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one thing i dun understand about the mum is y she always wanna interfere in my relationship with her daughter, i already seldom see my gf but yet the mum still tells her not to keep in contact with me everynight, the mum even made my gf cry and keep saying she is dumb and naive, is there someone i can call to go to their house to counsel the bored mother who always attacks on my poor gf?
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you have to understand that every parent have different ways of expressing their concern for their child.
most parents express their love and concern by being nice and fair to their child. some believe that by totally controlling their child, it's the best way to protect and care for them. others express their concern by scolding and punishing them into submission.
you must have heard before the chinese phrase, 'to hit is to love, to scold is to adore'? (not very sure about the exact phrase...sorry)
in this case, her mother thinks it's best for her daughter if she has total control over her life. this way, she can prevent any kind of harm from coming to her daughter. her mother might have been through alot of emotional pains during her early years, and now she's determined not to let it happen to her daughter.
there are two ways for you to handle this matter:
1) choose to avoid the problem and run away. that is, if you're not planning on marrying her.
2) you have to gain the trust of her mother first. right now, she's treating you like her enemy because she doesn't trust that you will treat her daughter good.
you must find some way to appease her and let her realise that you aren't the kind of person she believed to be.
i must tell you that this will take up ALOT of your time, effort, and patience. but it will definitely be worthwhile.
good luck man! -
Elope with ur gf lah. Since she is so sadden by her mum. Such mums are really overboard.Originally posted by collie76:one thing i dun understand about the mum is y she always wanna interfere in my relationship with her daughter, i already seldom see my gf but yet the mum still tells her not to keep in contact with me everynight, the mum even made my gf cry and keep saying she is dumb and naive, is there someone i can call to go to their house to counsel the bored mother who always attacks on my poor gf? -
eloping is not a choice as its suicide, today new paper sunday page 11 tells about a story which the grandma is taking her son and daughter in law to court over her grandson and the grandma claims that both the son and daughter in law are ill treating her grandson, in the end the court forbids the grandma from eeting the grandson.
the grandma in this case is similar to my gf mum ..... -
Like it or not, even though r/s is between two persons, you cannot ignore your gf's parents.And no matter what, they are your gf's closest relative.
If u wanna get married, as a formality, have to go thru her parents.
If you happened to get get married, her parents instantly become your relatives.
When u got a child, besides your parents, they will become the child's grandparents.
So, if she's the girl for you, no matter what's the obstacle ahead, you have to face it. -
I might face this problem very soon too. So I am working really hard to go U. For this reason and for another chance to see her... Haven't seen her since Teacher's Day...
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Is her mom very high educated??Originally posted by collie76:m a diploma holder and i m going out with a degree holder, she seems to accept me for wat i m coz i m a diploma holder but her mum is like belittling me and say i am not gd enough for her
i wonder any of u are in the same boat as me? -
Why not have a heart to heart talk with the mother? If not, be patience and try to be nice to ur gf's mother as nice as ur gf.... i believe that if you are sincere enough, things sooner or later will go your way.
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the mum is uneducated and was formally a kampong, the funny thing is everynight she tells my gf to break off with me everyday but the funny thing is the mum will still ask her whether i m going over to her place for dinner, is that weird?
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every mother will hope that her daughter can find happiness...i suppose she was just testing you. i think somehow, you're beginning to earn her trust. now that's weird.
but still, good luck man! -
why don't you pay her a surprise visit and talk to her? See what she wants? If she shuts you out be persistant and keep visiting her. Perhaps, she will see how sincere you are.Originally posted by collie76:the mum is uneducated and was formally a kampong, the funny thing is everynight she tells my gf to break off with me everyday but the funny thing is the mum will still ask her whether i m going over to her place for dinner, is that weird? -
u going out with the mum or the girl?Originally posted by collie76:m a diploma holder and i m going out with a degree holder, she seems to accept me for wat i m coz i m a diploma holder but her mum is like belittling me and say i am not gd enough for her
i wonder any of u are in the same boat as me?
we live our lives for ourselves, not others. choose what u like and not what other like of/abt u. -
easy to say......Originally posted by mujiland:u going out with the mum or the girl?
we live our lives for ourselves, not others. choose what u like and not what other like of/abt u.