i believe in being a loner...
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January: How old are you?
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i hav no choice... most ppl either dun like me or jus simply bo-chap. Hence aft being rejected by frens/gf for like 999999 times, i began to cultivate the mentality that being alone is better. some reasons include:
1) one loves u more than urself
2) U can't be rejected if u are alone
3) U have nothin, so nothin to lose
4) Its already the worst, it can't get any worst...
5) Dun need to bother urself with "small talks", "clickin with ppl" -
I got rejected too lol. last time tio reject once, then nv care bout gf anymore...
tt was...sec 1 lolZZZ
the gal said --> I too short ( i was indeed short during sec 1 .. like ..145 lol. now 167 liddat. at least far better lol )
not handsome...
i think loner is for me..for my rest of my life. people always bully me.. because i looked like a nerd, or an arrogant nerd..( which i was not..not a nerd..also not arrogant ... )
what i hate most is my mum..last time when i'm more "active", my mum always forbids me to play around after sch..like soccer, basketball, go JJ play yugioh, say before 5pm muz go home.. i was like..wtf, i have no freedom, and my mum said i got freedom, but what she meant was pure freedom WITHIN the house... So since then, i lost lots of friends coz of lack of interation with my friends...but ..meh.. now already loner..even if i wanna have friends , it wont happen... -
I do agree with most of the things that you said. But life with frens is definitely better than a life without.Originally posted by january:i believe in being a loner because i see relationship in the soicety as
superficial, since they are superficial why don't i adopt being-a-loner concept.
when times are good friends meet up and talk cork.
when times are bad or money is involved, especially a large amount,
friends seldom reach out to help.
people always say that we should treasure out loves one because we never know when accident can take their lives away, but how many people actually practices what they preach.
my views are, friendship is made because people are afraid of being labelled
as an outcast, has liitle are no friends.
also , friendship is made because talking about common things is fun and
it having a friendship group gives people a sense of identity.
and people needs a sense of identiy, unknowingly to themselves, because
they have fears in them.
there are other aspects , positive and negative things about different relationship to be disscuss, but i believe that
at the end of the day, people needs to depend on themselves, relationship
which you sometimes can use it asa a shoulder to lean against, is unstable.
as a loner, i often try not to run away from my fears because since i depend on myself, i try to overcome it myself through regular self reflection.
Accidents do happen, and might even take ur love ones away. Many dun practise what they preach. True, but what is an accident? You can't prevent it. There will definitely be regrets in life, i believe.
Why are you so pessimistic? Since relationships can be unstable, I believe frenships are more reliable and lasting. I'm blessed, I have very caring and good frens around me. They will always be around for me in times of need.
Money is always a sensitive issue. Friendships cannot be measured by monetary terms. Relatives might even fall out due to money issues, not to mention friens.
If you find yourself lack of frens, then it's time to reflect. What have you done or given to your frens? I always believe in give and take. Dun ever take people for granted. Learn to appreciate them.
What is your definition of a fren? -
im a loner too and i enjoy being one ..... mostly alone ..... go shopping, watch movie etc ... free and easy
but sometimes does click with a really few gd frenz
from pri sch to sec .... has been given nick name like pig, "da fei zhu" well they like to call let them ..... dont respond to them ... the more u get angry and scold them back .. the more they like to call me pig ........
i dont really like to make small talk or telling plp about what i do today ... what i buy ........ coz life is always the same for me nothing special about it so dont bother to talk about it -
lol dont scare me le leh~ I this yr going poly le.. very scared..after hearing so many "fake friends" in poly. haiz...
must learn tai chi quan u all~ getting angry only makes yourself hurt ~ saw that from a taichi book lol. anyway, poly got tai chi cca? :p -
If you find yourself lack of frens, then it's time to reflect. What have you done or given to your frens? I always believe in give and take. Dun ever take people for granted. Learn to appreciate them.
i have reflected .. but so what ?
What is your definition of a fren?
Give and take.. i give way most of the time, yet they take...take it for granted..
in what way i was wrong? i dont know..
i always give way..they talk behind my back, saying i was a dog, i did nothing..i act as if i heard nothing and try to mantain the friendship, but they began to badmouth on.. spreading to the whole class ( the next class beside my class, my friends' friends were there ) . some guy..named him R, said i have attitude problem.. and i dont even know that guy until i know of this issue!! Everytime i walk past the class, they then start to gossip bout me, saying i was a focker, bastard, kao beh and such, but what can i do?!!
my so called friends...need help then call for me..if not, i was neglected , or shd i say abandoned..
when they all wanna go watch movie, they have to find a time when i'm not around..they do not want me to stick around..why ?!!! I dont fking hell know!!
I always wanted lots of friends, which was my dream from sec 1 till now..yet, ...haiz...
Every thing is bout my face, ppl see le..not say i buay song then say i guai lan, xiao pai kia, kao beh...my face born liddat how!!??
WHY GOD CREATE PPL WITH UGLY FACE THEN???!!!!
haiz...man...sorry for the harsh tone.. no offence to anyone here. sry for 2 post tho -
which poly u going?Originally posted by nikeX:lol dont scare me le leh~ I this yr going poly le.. very scared..after hearing so many "fake friends" in poly. haiz...
must learn tai chi quan u all~ getting angry only makes yourself hurt ~ saw that from a taichi book lol. anyway, poly got tai chi cca? :p
mine alright la.
if u want more friends in poly, join a cca.
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dont let yr face make u feel so depress............... maybe try to smile more ... and be happy....... juz heck care (i always do this) ....Originally posted by nikeX:Every thing is bout my face, ppl see le..not say i buay song then say i guai lan, xiao pai kia, kao beh...my face born liddat how!!??
WHY GOD CREATE PPL WITH UGLY FACE THEN???!!!!
haiz...man...sorry for the harsh tone.. no offence to anyone here. sry for 2 post tho
dont want to make myself sad by those big bad mouth remarks.......... -
can heck care. but sometimes get very emotional ( eh.. i'm a guy ok. guy also can cry wad lol ). like if i heard those harsh comments from "friends" ar..feel very "xing suan" .. it's like..kena betray
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things the ugly side of the society can do.
it just makes u wanna turn away and hide yourself sometimes.
however there's a limit to how long u can hide yourself.
i think it's impossible to abstain from relationships with any other humans.
even if u somehow succeed, u'll be labelled as even weirder, and people will stay away from u even more.
the more u run the worse it gets.
just go out there and face life as it is.
u don't have to go around delibrately looking for true friends.
yes, it's true that true friends are hard to find.
but hard doesn't mean impossible you know.
they are out there. and when u've found such a friend, u'd realise u don't need plenty. its quality over quantity.
if all fails, there's still a group of people u can turn to, and that's ur family.
it always helps if u have siblings of the same sex.
finally just a quote to show how men are made to NOT live alone. It may not comply exactly with what's happening in your life, but it does prove a point:
Then the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to live alone. I will make a suitable companion to help him.'' So he took some soil from the ground and formed all the animals and all the birds. Then he brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and that is how they all got their names. So the man named all the birds and all the animals; but not one of them was a suitable companion to help him.
Then the Lord God made the man fall into a deep sleep, and while he was sleeping, he took out one of the man's ribs and closed up the flesh. He formed a woman out of the rib and brought her to him.
( nope, i'm not preaching. )
Hope this helps. -
well, reason i yearn for friends is mainly that i can't get along with my parents. so i wanted some company of friends...
my mum favor my brother, 23 yrs old soon. no matter what arguement ar, she sure help my brother.. even to the extent that my brother is wrong or he threatens to punch me, my mum still helps him.. everytime my brother threatens to beat me up, or beat those people he hate out there, he's only all talk. he dont dare to beat up anyone, only dare to beat me, which he did so many times but my mum always side him. then my father, pa lao puo, also help my mum.. in the end, i sure lose lor..
my bro kinda muscular and thinks he's very strong, but as always, i believe in using intelligence rather than strength.
my brother very...haiz..dunno what to say..like always make lame comments, play the fking guitar when i was watching tv..tell him shut up then he not happy, then argue, and blah blah..he wins again...mama boy !
and i dont know why he have so many friends... man..he's so fake..a good innocent guy outside, at home act like king...
my dad still says that i muz follow his attitude ..praising how good he is and such..man..i rather be a guai lan person being guai lan to everyone rather than being fake..act like diff person at other people...
to spaded : i planning to go SP . tho i stay in woodlands lol. NYP nearer but the time table very .. erm.. messy..(?). -
There will come a time when you will find your true friends and people will sit back and take notice of you.Don't act and feel despondant, because you will only make it worse.So what if you had a bad secondary school life?In the years to come, you will look back and realise that your fears were unfounded, go develop an interest, take up photography, music ,etc.. things that can energize and nurture whoever you are inside.Ignore those people who are superficial and only judge you based on your bank account, your popularity or your looks.They will learn their lesson sooner or later, and bear in mind that you are a unique individual and if others do not appreciate you for what you are, then it's their loss.Don't feel down, just move on.
Life is a long journey and you are only at the beginning.Sometimes, the ones who have a more mature intellect are the ones shunned by the mediocre crowd, who are more concerned with specious and fawning behavior, often showing a marked lack of intelligence and exuding lots of superficiality in their behavior.Fret not guys, you'll get where you wanna go.Just hold on there
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At work i'm totally a different person, I'm chirpy, smiley, nice and friendly. But the minute i knock off from work, I'm total subzero.Originally posted by january:do you?
being lonely has many advantages i found out.
to be free from all ties is ideal.
anyone has similar beliefs?
At home i don't talk to anyone, i only stay in my room with music/ vcd, some wine or beer, or not do my paper work, read... Just don't talk. Even on my way to work or on my way home, my ears are plucked with music and i won't even smile....
I do believe that it's ok to be a loner but as for your previous thread the finding a faithful sex partner but no committment.... go die lar. -
I won't look too far into the future like will i be a loner . then can't get a girl etc..
What i feared for the time being is poly. Well, in poly, you wont really get to be with your old friends anymore unless u follow their course like a dog that is.. I am afraid and tired of being bully again.. if orientation i dont even know how to face it.. so many new faces and there's bound to be groups of friends among them, when i will be the only loner by then.. so many group works, and i feared i wont be in any group...
Tho it's still the beginning of my life and i have not see the outside world yet, but before that i think i'm gonna get depression le...haiz..why was i such a failure...my "friends" look for job , easily get 1 le. mine..go interview le..last min say i tio replaced..interview for another...say uniform not ready ..postpone 1 wk..actually working from 17 jan to 7 feb..now become 24jan to 7 feb...less than 2 wks...
grRRR... feel like killing myself...no friends, no job, no caring family members... -
I believe in the Great Balance; maintaining social circle and also time for inner self.
We can only achieve this much if we are a loner.
My astrological studies have come to understand that no-man is an island.
You can be self-sufficient; no doubt.
But there is ONLY so much you can achieve by being a loner.
Your personal growth is critically hindered.
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Astrological Mode: ON
Likely affliction in 7th/11th house or Sign of Libra and Aquarius involved; Saturn strong.
Cheers -
why do you sound wise beyond your years?Originally posted by LazerLordz:There will come a time when you will find your true friends and people will sit back and take notice of you.Don't act and feel despondant, because you will only make it worse.So what if you had a bad secondary school life?In the years to come, you will look back and realise that your fears were unfounded, go develop an interest, take up photography, music ,etc.. things that can energize and nurture whoever you are inside.Ignore those people who are superficial and only judge you based on your bank account, your popularity or your looks.They will learn their lesson sooner or later, and bear in mind that you are a unique individual and if others do not appreciate you for what you are, then it's their loss.Don't feel down, just move on.
Life is a long journey and you are only at the beginning.Sometimes, the ones who have a more mature intellect are the ones shunned by the mediocre crowd, who are more concerned with specious and fawning behavior, often showing a marked lack of intelligence and exuding lots of superficiality in their behavior.Fret not guys, you'll get where you wanna go.Just hold on there -
don't worry about his social life folks. He was soliciting for faithful sexual partner with no strings attached...
Isn't he such a wonderful loner. -
Am I?Haha, sometimes we humans fail to behave exactly as to what we preach.Originally posted by foxwalk:why do you sound wise beyond your years? 
But thanks man.. -
it is said that ppl who drink wine are loners
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u dont talk to anyone at home ? wat about ur family ? wat if ur mom comes in and shoots u wif many questions ? how do u respond arh ? sorry im assuming u live wif ur parents.. so how???Originally posted by subzero_baby:At work i'm totally a different person, I'm chirpy, smiley, nice and friendly. But the minute i knock off from work, I'm total subzero.
At home i don't talk to anyone, i only stay in my room with music/ vcd, some wine or beer, or not do my paper work, read... Just don't talk. Even on my way to work or on my way home, my ears are plucked with music and i won't even smile....
I do believe that it's ok to be a loner but as for your previous thread the finding a faithful sex partner but no committment.... go die lar. -
hey yunhaier... nice to meet someone whose got interest in astrology...
i got gemini rising.. so i am a loner sometimes too... also wif my virgo sun and moon... makes me extra shyOriginally posted by Yunhaier:
I believe in the Great Balance; maintaining social circle and also time for inner self.
We can only achieve this much if we are a loner.
My astrological studies have come to understand that no-man is an island.
You can be self-sufficient; no doubt.
But there is ONLY so much you can achieve by being a loner.
Your personal growth is critically hindered.
***
[b]Astrological Mode: ON
Likely affliction in 7th/11th house or Sign of Libra and Aquarius involved; Saturn strong.
Cheers[/b] -
I like my own company sometimes : ) It's Not being lonely...
FeowFeowOriginally posted by january:do you?
being lonely has many advantages i found out.
to be free from all ties is ideal.
anyone has similar beliefs? -
u are probably in company wif ur alter ego...
i am a similar case like u... like to be alone sometimes.. but people ask me why i am so lonely...
however lonely doent necessary mean anti-social...Originally posted by FeowFeow:I like my own company sometimes : ) It's Not being lonely...
FeowFeow -
well have you heard of someone married and who's husband prefers to be alone or "loner" all the time? and wife was treated like a stranger all the time, this is not a good sign of a happy married life am i right?Originally posted by january:although i say i am loner, when it comes to people handling, i try not to shy away, because i believe in being assertive and getting things done.
if you the kind who is a loner and don't dare to approach people even for valid purposes, then that is not beri good.