Will a young unmarried female want a much older divorcee?
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I totally agree!Originally posted by Devil1976:Welcome to the 21st century... Women can be liberal these days.... Some of them no longer see themselves as the 'rugi' party when it comes to sex... In fact, sees it often more as a mutual need...
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i think maybe she lacks the fatherly love and that she can see that in having such an old man boyfriend......Originally posted by ILPSY:Hmm... Hard to comment... We are listening to one side of the story...
I guess the gal stays with the guy coz he is able to give her things that she yearned for? Father's love? Tender Loving Care??? hmm...
Maybe, she sees something in him that other ppl missed?! hmm... -
thats precisely the point, the stupidity is smthing which pple cant see when they are blinded by love but bystanders can tell whether a relship wld work or notOriginally posted by Devil1976:In a way... There could be things that bysiders can't see as a spectator... What sometimes seems 'best' or 'obvious' to us might only be of such values from our own point of view or consideration...
Nonetheless... If it's really such a foolish, especially BLIND decision.. Often it would not be so easily persuaded off... Stupidity is not something we can easily identify within ourselves at times, but only something which expresses itself in different forms and at different levels....
for instance, i got a very good fren whom married after a whirlwind courtship and i felt this guy was not right for her as he only knew how to sweet talk and i warned her about him
true enough, after a few years of marriage, she wanted to divorce and after three years of wrangling then they managed...see, spectators noe best....but when stupidity presents itself in different forms..people can see it and hopefully the gal can wake up from her drunken stupor -
I'll repeat myself again. What seems 'right' for the bystanders might not be actually so for the actual involved. Ultimately, it's still the person's life. So who's to really judge? (unless 'crimes' are commited where the person does something to someone or something else and the society's there to judge)Originally posted by limahkow:thats precisely the point, the stupidity is smthing which pple cant see when they are blinded by love but bystanders can tell whether a relship wld work or not
for instance, i got a very good fren whom married after a whirlwind courtship and i felt this guy was not right for her as he only knew how to sweet talk and i warned her about him
true enough, after a few years of marriage, she wanted to divorce and after three years of wrangling then they managed...see, spectators noe best....but when stupidity presents itself in different forms..people can see it and hopefully the gal can wake up from her drunken stupor
Your friend's example is just one. You could be right about that case but not necessarily every other. Though indeed, I would agree with you that involved parties usually would have a rather high tendency to be 'delusionised' or such?
Often when things don't work out, people just forget what they wanted in the 1st place, fight for it and had actually 'enjoyed' from it before... Oh well...
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why not? maybe there is something which she can find from the divorcee which cannot from other guys? like care and concern? or maybe that kind of mature thinking that the divorcee consist?Originally posted by limahkow:just wondering whether you young females out there maybe say twenties or thirties wld want an older divorcee who is more than 15 yrs older than them bearing in mind the divorcee is old, not rich and do not have much assets
and this female is not from china or vietnam, yes a singaporean girl...strange but true, is love that blind? -
if you read the post, limahkow had said the fellow is a lousy bastard, he treats cohabitation like a game and who knows, after having a fling with the girl, he dumps her ... some gals do fall for guys who are kind ( i read that from the papers the other day on a journalist's view that nice guys do finish first and also the journalist has a fren who actually had a married friend who fell for her colleague becuz he was kind)Originally posted by Danisdead101times:why not? maybe there is something which she can find from the divorcee which cannot from other guys? like care and concern? or maybe that kind of mature thinking that the divorcee consist?
but how many know if the person is really kind, he could be kind to her at first then taken advantage of her physically, dumps her for some reason and then go on and find his new prey ..... -
there is only one thing i can say from this...let them learn from mistakes then...but ofcuz if they can find someone who cares and concern for them sure is good for them isn't it?Originally posted by armygirl:if you read the post, limahkow had said the fellow is a lousy bastard, he treats cohabitation like a game and who knows, after having a fling with the girl, he dumps her ... some gals do fall for guys who are kind ( i read that from the papers the other day on a journalist's view that nice guys do finish first and also the journalist has a fren who actually had a married friend who fell for her colleague becuz he was kind)
but how many know if the person is really kind, he could be kind to her at first then taken advantage of her physically, dumps her for some reason and then go on and find his new prey .....
everyone also wants to be doted and loved~ who will knows will come to this state? so just have to take up the consequences after the decision made by themself~ -
yah lor, true, let her go and slap herself in the face and be deceived by the facade of things..care and concern can be faked and later, when she finds that she has slept with him and later he says he does not want a commitmentOriginally posted by Danisdead101times:there is only one thing i can say from this...let them learn from mistakes then...but ofcuz if they can find someone who cares and concern for them sure is good for them isn't it?
everyone also wants to be doted and loved~ who will knows will come to this state? so just have to take up the consequences after the decision made by themself~
from her but just to cohabit, then she wld realise wat a ba stard he has been
this guy has said that if the girl loves him, the marriage cert is not important and to a girl, committment in paper is also important and when she finds out, the guy wld conveniently break up with her
tis is wat happened in his previous relship, when the gal started asking him for a firm commitment, he din want to and then dump her
tis girl only does not know the extent of his past relships and pbly does not know that he was ever divorced before, so she had better wake up fast and realise that if she wants someone who is committed, he wldnt be the one -
I was left behind; the crowd, brandished swords and spears, came with the intention to destroy me. I was a lone warrior... they came in numbers. I recalled their sadistic glee when the blade thrust right where the heart was... where fatal wounds would leave me to die eventually. But I cannot be destroyed. The gift of immortality serve to preserve my life forever. The pain remains, so does life.Originally posted by Devil1976:I'll repeat myself again. What seems 'right' for the bystanders might not be actually so for the actual involved. Ultimately, it's still the person's life. So who's to really judge? (unless 'crimes' are commited where the person does something to someone or something else and the society's there to judge)
Your friend's example is just one. You could be right about that case but not necessarily every other. Though indeed, I would agree with you that involved parties usually would have a rather high tendency to be 'delusionised' or such?
Often when things don't work out, people just forget what they wanted in the 1st place, fight for it and had actually 'enjoyed' from it before... Oh well...
Now that I am omipotent, formidable beyond their imagination. Their cruel intention cannot even scatch my armour. Their views surrender in pathetic defeat.
I live only for myself.
False views meant nothing.
-Lord YHE, vampire.
P.S: (Pls ignore)
Cheers -
Hmm...Originally posted by Yunhaier:I was left behind; the crowd, brandished swords and spears, came with the intention to destroy me. I was a lone warrior... they came in numbers. I recalled their sadistic glee when the blade thrust right where the heart was... where fatal wounds would leave me to die eventually. But I cannot be destroyed. The gift of immortality serve to preserve my life forever. The pain remains, so does life.
Now that I am omipotent, formidable beyond their imagination. Their cruel intention cannot even scatch my armour. Their views surrender in pathetic defeat.
I live only for myself.
False views meant nothing.
-Lord YHE, vampire.
P.S: (Pls ignore)
Cheers
I've always thought vampires are more romantic than devils...?
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can anyone tell me wat has vampires got to do with our topic of divorced man todayOriginally posted by Devil1976:Hmm...
I've always thought vampires are more romantic than devils...? -
And I always thought that devils are more seductive than vampires...?Originally posted by Devil1976:Hmm...
I've always thought vampires are more romantic than devils...? 
Cheers -
Originally posted by armygirl:can anyone tell me wat has vampires got to do with our topic of divorced man today
Basically its nothing. I am responsing to certain issue that is meant to be ignored by all except me.
*** Divorcee-kinda relationship?
Every woman has that kind of vulnerability in love. Their emotions has a door that fits certain keys. The ones that cannot be seduced are the ones isolated into solitude love life by birthright - unresponsive like virgin Goddess Artemis, desire to be unattached and kept their heart shut.
A very much older divorcee man (VMODM for short) understand this logic completely. A young man, even though he could have any woman he wanted, would find it difficult to emulate the air and feel of a VMODM. They have their own charm no doubt, but its a different thing with what maturity seduction gives.
In astrology, Saturn's staying power is like wine - gets better with age. And ALL VMODM knows how to make use of this planetary influence and of course, Younger woman with Saturn in 7th house could likely marry an older man (although not neccessary chronologically speaking).
I wouldn't say an absolute NO to such relationship, however, I am more concern about the love attitude this man is equipped with.
There are solid reasons why marriages fail - they don't fail for no reasons. Many times, it's the individual, not cause of the marriage itself. Sometimes its the life of the individual - people reject BGR cosmic lesson are forced to absorb the challenges their marriage bring forth. Some failed badly... others survived on a thin line.
A young woman, greenhorn in love, being tapped onto their vulnerability by VMODM, finds it enriching.
Psychologically and emotionally - there are four factors why VMODM would choose a very much younger woman. (Or vice vista in the woman's case)
I) To restore fallen charm (Feminine Charm)
II) Fatherly figure (Vice vista)
III) Desire for the youth... the innocence (Maturity)
IV) Easier to satisfy than woman of his peers. (Material satisfaction and abundance)
P.S: Attractions works in dual mode. With our needs being satisfied in any relationships, mutually and simultaneously.
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
i agree with yunhaier's points as follows: Basically its nothing. I am responsing to certain issue that is meant to be ignored by all except me.
*** Divorcee-kinda relationship?
Every woman has that kind of vulnerability in love. Their emotions has a door that fits certain keys. The ones that cannot be seduced are the ones isolated into solitude love life by birthright - unresponsive like virgin Goddess Artemis, desire to be unattached and kept their heart shut.
A very much older divorcee man (VMODM for short) understand this logic completely. A young man, even though he could have any woman he wanted, would find it difficult to emulate the air and feel of a VMODM. They have their own charm no doubt, but its a different thing with what maturity seduction gives.
In astrology, Saturn's staying power is like wine - gets better with age. And ALL VMODM knows how to make use of this planetary influence and of course, Younger woman with Saturn in 7th house could likely marry an older man (although not neccessary chronologically speaking).
I wouldn't say an absolute NO to such relationship, however, I am more concern about the love attitude this man is equipped with.
There are solid reasons why marriages fail - [b]they don't fail for no reasons. Many times, it's the individual, not cause of the marriage itself. Sometimes its the life of the individual - people reject BGR cosmic lesson are forced to absorb the challenges their marriage bring forth. Some failed badly... others survived on a thin line.
A young woman, greenhorn in love, being tapped onto their vulnerability by VMODM, finds it enriching.
Psychologically and emotionally - there are four factors why VMODM would choose a very much younger woman. (Or vice vista in the woman's case)
I) To restore fallen charm (Feminine Charm)
II) Fatherly figure (Vice vista)
III) Desire for the youth... the innocence (Maturity)
IV) Easier to satisfy than woman of his peers. (Material satisfaction and abundance)
P.S: Attractions works in dual mode. With our needs being satisfied in any relationships, mutually and simultaneously.
Cheers [/b]
I) To restore fallen charm (Feminine Charm) [color=darkblue](tis i truely agree because vmodm has the charms to turn on like a tap as they have "experienced" many types of women
II) Fatherly figure (Vice vista) (true also, they need someone to "protect" them and give them advice, maybe a younger guy cant satisfy these needs)
III) Desire for the youth... the innocence (Maturity) (true, the old man wants innocence, the young gal wants maturity)
IV) Easier to satisfy than woman of his peers. (Material satisfaction and abundance) (true also, becuz women his age wld have achieved alot and dun want a man who hasnt achieved alot but women younger wouldnt have achieved much and think that a man having car would be damn great) [/color] -
Nothing.. Just having our own mini conversation... If the topic-starter is offended by this, I shall cease my 'mini-conversation' anytime....Originally posted by armygirl:can anyone tell me wat has vampires got to do with our topic of divorced man today -
Well... Seductive and romantic are 2 different things...?Originally posted by Yunhaier:And I always thought that devils are more seductive than vampires...?
Cheers -
better go back to the original topic leh, anyone got any fresh ideas to contribute?Originally posted by Devil1976:Well... Seductive and romantic are 2 different things...? -
better go back to the original topic leh, anyone got any fresh ideas to contribute?Originally posted by Devil1976:Well... Seductive and romantic are 2 different things...? -
What's there to talk about...? I would say it's their life and just what they wanna do with it... If you can't talk them out of it, and you can't convince them of your stand (just like as much as they can't convince you...?)... What you wanna do about it...? Sue them..?Originally posted by armygirl:better go back to the original topic leh, anyone got any fresh ideas to contribute? -
that shows that not all SDU people are desperate but some of them certainly are...Originally posted by Devil1976:What's there to talk about...? I would say it's their life and just what they wanna do with it... If you can't talk them out of it, and you can't convince them of your stand (just like as much as they can't convince you...?)... What you wanna do about it...? Sue them..?
and back to the case of my fren who married and divorced, it seems that i am 100 percent right in every case, after her divorce, she got involved with another colleague A (her ex also was her colleague) and later she broke up with A because of his indecisiveness and it was because of A she divorced her ex husband
and whilst together with A, she lent money to B about more than 10 k and
then later she broke up with A and went with B and broke off and then went together with C, a divorcee who is a clerk and a bankrupt case (my fren is a graduate)
and now, she broke off with C and she fell in love with her tour guide who i think also is from another country and the guy is supposedly coming to singapore to work but also not certain
you see, sometimes NOT all, we can see wats going wrong, she still cant see wats wrong with herself although she admitted to me that she knows she is crazy but cant pin down why...one relationship after another and yet she never learns from it -
I think you fren needs to see a counsellor. There are certain traits in ppl that make them do the same foolish things over and over again. Maybe, she can't help herself from falling into that kind of traps. Some of us, fall in love with another spouse, because their mannerisms are similar to our parents. Hmm...Originally posted by limahkow:that shows that not all SDU people are desperate but some of them certainly are...
and back to the case of my fren who married and divorced, it seems that i am 100 percent right in every case, after her divorce, she got involved with another colleague A (her ex also was her colleague) and later she broke up with A because of his indecisiveness and it was because of A she divorced her ex husband
and whilst together with A, she lent money to B about more than 10 k and
then later she broke up with A and went with B and broke off and then went together with C, a divorcee who is a clerk and a bankrupt case (my fren is a graduate)
and now, she broke off with C and she fell in love with her tour guide who i think also is from another country and the guy is supposedly coming to singapore to work but also not certain
you see, sometimes NOT all, we can see wats going wrong, she still cant see wats wrong with herself although she admitted to me that she knows she is crazy but cant pin down why...one relationship after another and yet she never learns from it
I guess, she needs someone to pinpoint it to her. But, of course, she will need to realise that its really a problem, or else, nobody can persuade her to go! -
back to my fren's story, very interesting one :Originally posted by ILPSY:I think you fren needs to see a counsellor. There are certain traits in ppl that make them do the same foolish things over and over again. Maybe, she can't help herself from falling into that kind of traps. Some of us, fall in love with another spouse, because their mannerisms are similar to our parents. Hmm...
I guess, she needs someone to pinpoint it to her. But, of course, she will need to realise that its really a problem, or else, nobody can persuade her to go!
1. her husband wld force her to have "couple relations" with him in the morning due to him being able to have it due to a "hard on" and she felt like she was being raped
2. her boyfren A who was the push factor in her divorce is also damn strange...he is a mother's boy who wld depend on his mother for every small thing under the sun and wld even call my fren to ask what colour shirt to buy bearing in mind she is not there physically with him..A is 36 years old tis year
3. then came B whom borrowed alot of money from her because he lost in a gambling cruise and she took a long time to get the money back from him (she can lend money to this type of people and when i jokingly said i wanted to borrow money from her, she said if only people took a gun to point to my head then she wld lend me and ihave known her for twenty years already almost)he is not of good character also..B is also 36 years old tis year
4. then came C who is her colleague (both A and C are colleagues, A is a graduate ) but C is not, C is a clerk and a bankrupt case and C has DIVORCED TWICE.....and always make her pay for things because he wants to eat good stuff like going japanese restaurants etc and eat at other expensive places. C and her were good frens only and then later developed into such a strange relship
5. after C, she went for a tour and then got to know D and D is from China and is 7 years younger than her and D actually came down to singapore for a few days and stayed at her house...and now D wants a further relship with her but she says she cant leave her condo and her job
so i think she needs to see a counsellor as she keeps falling for the same type of man etc but somehow, she is too stingy to see a counsellor and does not see the need to..wat to do? -
Is she asking you for help?Originally posted by limahkow:back to my fren's story, very interesting one :
1. her husband wld force her to have "couple relations" with him in the morning due to him being able to have it due to a "hard on" and she felt like she was being raped
2. her boyfren A who was the push factor in her divorce is also damn strange...he is a mother's boy who wld depend on his mother for every small thing under the sun and wld even call my fren to ask what colour shirt to buy bearing in mind she is not there physically with him..A is 36 years old tis year
3. then came B whom borrowed alot of money from her because he lost in a gambling cruise and she took a long time to get the money back from him (she can lend money to this type of people and when i jokingly said i wanted to borrow money from her, she said if only people took a gun to point to my head then she wld lend me and ihave known her for twenty years already almost)he is not of good character also..B is also 36 years old tis year
4. then came C who is her colleague (both A and C are colleagues, A is a graduate ) but C is not, C is a clerk and a bankrupt case and C has DIVORCED TWICE.....and always make her pay for things because he wants to eat good stuff like going japanese restaurants etc and eat at other expensive places. C and her were good frens only and then later developed into such a strange relship
5. after C, she went for a tour and then got to know D and D is from China and is 7 years younger than her and D actually came down to singapore for a few days and stayed at her house...and now D wants a further relship with her but she says she cant leave her condo and her job
so i think she needs to see a counsellor as she keeps falling for the same type of man etc but somehow, she is too stingy to see a counsellor and does not see the need to..wat to do? -
she can admit to me that she is xiao and always fall so deeply in love but she din ask me for help, for the fact we knew each other so long, she is those type can put "boyfrens before frens"Originally posted by Devil1976:Is she asking you for help?
she told me the last bf borrowed $200 from her when he came to singapore and when i joked asking her to lend me money, she said she wld lend me 100 and that is 100 rupiah
she is that type "you yi xing mei ren xing" (only think of the opposite gender and not her own frens"
cmon, man, tis is not the first time she fell in love with a foreigner, many years ago, she fell for a china tour guide and that type she already had a boyfren....but that boy fren din marry her and nothing came out of that relship with that tour guide, that time both of us were still in NUS
so she always repeats and repeats the same mistake over and over again.....
No one can help her anymore -
Well... At least she thinks there's nothing wrong with her and it's really her own life style yup..? So who are we to really critisize her...?Originally posted by limahkow:she can admit to me that she is xiao and always fall so deeply in love but she din ask me for help, for the fact we knew each other so long, she is those type can put "boyfrens before frens"
she told me the last bf borrowed $200 from her when he came to singapore and when i joked asking her to lend me money, she said she wld lend me 100 and that is 100 rupiah
she is that type "you yi xing mei ren xing" (only think of the opposite gender and not her own frens"
cmon, man, tis is not the first time she fell in love with a foreigner, many years ago, she fell for a china tour guide and that type she already had a boyfren....but that boy fren din marry her and nothing came out of that relship with that tour guide, that time both of us were still in NUS
so she always repeats and repeats the same mistake over and over again.....
No one can help her anymore