Should I Trust Him Again ?
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HAIZ THIS IS A CLASSICAL STORY OF A STUPID GAL WITH A CRAFTY, JERK LIKE BF. I SEE THIS KIND OF STORY EVERY MONTH IN TEENAGE MAG...
MOST GALS LIKE TO ASK FOR ADVICES, BUT THEY WILL USUALLY END UP ACTING IN AN ILLOGICAL WAY. EVEN IF 9 OUT OF 10 REPLIES HERE TELLS TO DITCH HIM, I BET MY KU KU JIAO THAT IN THE END U WOULDN'T. THE ONLY SCENARIO IS U WILL POST HERE 6 MONTHS LATER, SAYING HOW MUCH MORE CHANCE U HAVE GIVEN HIM, HOW MUCH U HAVE SACRIFICED, YET HE STILL CHEAT OR DITCH U.
A LEOPARD WILL NEVER CHANGE ITS SPOT. JUS LIKE GALS WILL ALWAYS BE DUMB. THATS WHY WE HAVE AUNT AGONY -
Dats becos gals treasure love & relationship more den Guys...
Majority of the guys are heartless creature... -
no u are wrong..me is the nice guy..
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Originally posted by krispy:
Then why do the girls choose to love the "heartless creatures"? To add insult to injury, they choose not to love the not-so-"heartless creatures" -- the nice guy friends, but instead complain about the "heartless creatures" to the nice guy friends.
Dats becos gals treasure love & relationship more den Guys...
Majority of the guys are heartless creature...
And the nice guys come to Aunt Agony forums. -
i believe there are some guys who came here but are guilty themselves..anyway this is getting a bit sexist.. Krispy i think u haf to make the final decision of whether to gif him another chance.. you've been wif him fo rlike 2 years? so u shld noe his character and behaviour.. dun judge the wors he said but the attitude he use to bring the message across.. if u understand him u can tell whether he really meant it anot.. even if he does, with his personality, will he go back on his words? think thru this.. if u can feel the sincerity in him, gif him another chance since u also cant bear to leave him..if not move on and dun wait for miracles to happen.. cos sadly, they dun.. hope u make a right choice!Originally posted by Tuatau:Then why do the girls choose to love the "heartless creatures"? To add insult to injury, they choose not to love the not-so-"heartless creatures" -- the nice guy friends, but instead complain about the "heartless creatures" to the nice guy friends.
And the nice guys come to Aunt Agony forums.
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Dump him, even if you love him, he don't love you enough back, it is just a matter of time he will dump you. Don't dump him , you be depress for the rest of your life, dump him at least you be depress for a while, then you will move on. There are lots of better guy for you out there.Originally posted by krispy:my bf has been "collecting" hp nos. frm gals he noe in pubs... & when i asked him abt it... he lied to me... & make it seem as though its my fault dat i din trust him... the 1st time i found out dat he actually has been lying to me for the past half yr... during dat period i was suffering frm depression.. yet he din care abt mi & had the mood to go out to knw other gals... after dat time, he promised dat he will nv lie to me again.. so we patch things up.. & i tried my best to give him my trust & respect...
But recently i found out dat he's been lying to me again...when i confronted him.. he still felt dat he din do anything wrong... & still shouted at me.. den he even say, "see? i told u not to look at my message.. now u see liao wanna get angry.." i was really devastated & deeply hurt... i finally ended our 2years plus relationship...
now.. he sms me sayng he's sorry to hurt me.. & he starting to realise how much he love me after i left him... but he juz wanna cool things down 1st & change totally to commit himself to me...
i dunno whtr i shld trust him again... he betrayed my trust again & again... i dun wish to be hurt again... yet i still love him...
Can anyone advise me wat i shld do? -
Collect numbers, A little tipsy and horny
Sweet msgs, a little desire to fling
Shouts back at ya, A Man's pride being hurt
tries to patch up, Awaken temporally
gets back in, gets back what he wants
then starts the cycle, over and over again.
A little song, for a little tale in your life
happy memories, to be kept and not die
returning to the past, is an impossible task,
especially with a scar, in between your heart
Trust, brings forth a lie.
Promises, bring out the devil.
Faith, pure stupidness.
Love, nothing but suffering.
Hey manz.. Cheer up.. Heres a little song i composed for ya,
there are still many sweet and nice guys out there,
just be more careful in who you chose,
of course, guys get hurt too.. Only after the breakup. Hahz.
hmm..~ .. You'll probably need the chords? haha.. Just sing with the chords of Amajor 4 counts , Fminor 4 counts, Cmajor 4 counts, Dmajor 2 counts, Emajor 2 counts. ANd repeat the circle.. When you wanna end the song, Instead of Emajor at the end, play Gmajor instead.
Hope you have more happy experiences in the future~! Take care =) -
collecting numbers is one thing.... using it is another thing... do wat your heart says....
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Hmm. Learn to understand people better ba and Don't become bitter and cynical and stereotyping people simply cause you have been hurt by this person ba.Originally posted by krispy:Dats becos gals treasure love & relationship more den Guys...
Majority of the guys are heartless creature...
If you lose your ability to trust and love, it isn't "wisdom" it is your loss, and very not worth it, for someone like this
Plus one day, it might be you who would be forced to hurt someone and be 'heartless'. We all learn in cruel ways. -
Gender bashing again?Originally posted by Tuatau:Then why do the girls choose to love the "heartless creatures"? To add insult to injury, they choose not to love the not-so-"heartless creatures" -- the nice guy friends, but instead complain about the "heartless creatures" to the nice guy friends.
And the nice guys come to Aunt Agony forums.
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Your question is linked by the following three laws.
Law I:
Without the heartless man, nice guys wouldn't be nice: this rule is pretty logic. Without Evil, wtf is good?
Law II:
Psychological mindsets of a person determines alot about his/her relationship. This includes first 13 years of your life, your environment, your parents and of course your experience/past.
Law III:
Everyone is bounded by karma in Love. You fall in love to GROW, EVOLVE and LEARN, and not ending up as Cinderella or the Prince. Spiritual growth comes in here. Love is spiritual, not emotional.
Cheers -
It's so simple.
All those laws is bullshit.
Nice guys always finish last.
Look at the Rock stars.
Kid Rock, Tommy Lee.
They are bad guys yet they get the beautiful wives.
Nice guys are boring. So predictable.
Who would want to date a boring guy.
Fustrated chumps.Originally posted by Tuatau:Then why do the girls choose to love the "heartless creatures"? To add insult to injury, they choose not to love the not-so-"heartless creatures" -- the nice guy friends, but instead complain about the "heartless creatures" to the nice guy friends.
And the nice guys come to Aunt Agony forums. -
Originally posted by Oyathatsme:
i agree! i totally share ur sentiments!
It's so simple.
All those laws is bullshit.
[b]Nice guys always finish last.
Look at the Rock stars.
Kid Rock, Tommy Lee.
They are bad guys yet they get the beautiful wives.
Nice guys are boring. So predictable.
Who would want to date a boring guy.
Fustrated chumps.
[/b]
sigh.. im too nice liao. sobz~~ no one want me~~
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how do i noe whtr he's sincere abt changing/committing this time? -
dun believe. dun get hurt again.
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Majority....eh?Originally posted by krispy:Dats becos gals treasure love & relationship more den Guys...
Majority of the guys are heartless creature...
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Originally posted by krispy:
Sigh. I know you really want to believe that he would change and things would turn for the better. So let's just say if there really was a foolproof way of telling the sincerity of a guy, then there wouldn't be so many adulteries, divorces, abortions, unwed mothers and other social ills caused by failed relationships.
how do i noe whtr he's sincere abt changing/committing this time?
On second thoughts, maybe there is one. If you needed a liver transplant and asked him for half of his liver, he'd pass the test if he really gave it to you. He may be called foolish, but nobody could doubt his sincerity. -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Gender bashing? Ah no. Just responding to krispy's comment about "majority of the guys are heartless creatures" with a rhetorical question. If a girl knew that guys are heartless, then why does she choose to fall in love with one of those "heartless creatures"?
Gender bashing again?
A reasonable man would not hate girls simply because they choose to fall in love with "heartless creatures". There are many nice guys who would still love the girls even after they have been played out by the "heartless creatures". In extension to your 1st law, it is precisely because the girls have learned their lesson on evil that they learn to appreciate the good. (The smart ones would learn from others' lessons, the not-so-smart ones would learn from their own.)
Linking your 2nd and 3rd laws, it is also observed that many girls these days have been leading very protected lives with "Cinderella" images of marriage and love, no thanks to the movies, songs, magazines and other media they've grown up with. Such media always focus on the excitement of courtship, seldom on the drudgery of daily life after marriage.
Hence, coupled with the fact that most of them have received more education than their parents to earn enough money to support themselves, the girls chose to love men who could only bring to life the excitement of courtship, never realising that exciting boyfriends seldom made good husbands.
It takes wisdom to love on a "spiritual" level, but not many people do that these days. So Aunt Agony forums like this are always booming with business. -
Clap clapOriginally posted by Tuatau:Gender bashing? Ah no. Just responding to krispy's comment about "majority of the guys are heartless creatures" with a rhetorical question. If a girl knew that guys are heartless, then why does she choose to fall in love with one of those "heartless creatures"?
A reasonable man would not hate girls simply because they choose to fall in love with "heartless creatures". There are many nice guys who would still love the girls even after they have been played out by the "heartless creatures". In extension to your 1st law, it is precisely because the girls have learned their lesson on evil that they learn to appreciate the good. (The smart ones would learn from others' lessons, the not-so-smart ones would learn from their own.)
Linking your 2nd and 3rd laws, it is also observed that many girls these days have been leading very protected lives with "Cinderella" images of marriage and love, no thanks to the movies, songs, magazines and other media they've grown up with. Such media always focus on the excitement of courtship, seldom on the drudgery of daily life after marriage.
Hence, coupled with the fact that most of them have received more education than their parents to earn enough money to support themselves, the girls chose to love men who could only bring to life the excitement of courtship, never realising that exciting boyfriends seldom made good husbands.
It takes wisdom to love on a "spiritual" level, but not many people do that these days. So Aunt Agony forums like this are always booming with business.
well written... I fully agree about the media part... No offense to girls who like japanese/korea/watever love dramas or idol series but they portray such an unrealistic view of a relationship... Don't get brain washed by them -
Originally posted by Tuatau:Gender bashing? Ah no. Just responding to krispy's comment about "majority of the guys are heartless creatures" with a rhetorical question. If a girl knew that guys are heartless, then why does she choose to fall in love with one of those "heartless creatures"?
A reasonable man would not hate girls simply because they choose to fall in love with "heartless creatures". There are many nice guys who would still love the girls even after they have been played out by the "heartless creatures". In extension to your 1st law, it is precisely because the girls have learned their lesson on evil that they learn to appreciate the good. (The smart ones would learn from others' lessons, the not-so-smart ones would learn from their own.)
Linking your 2nd and 3rd laws, it is also observed that many girls these days have been leading very protected lives with "Cinderella" images of marriage and love, no thanks to the movies, songs, magazines and other media they've grown up with. Such media always focus on the excitement of courtship, seldom on the drudgery of daily life after marriage.
Hence, coupled with the fact that most of them have received more education than their parents to earn enough money to support themselves, the girls chose to love men who could only bring to life the excitement of courtship, never realising that exciting boyfriends seldom made good husbands.
It takes wisdom to love on a "spiritual" level, but not many people do that these days. So Aunt Agony forums like this are always booming with business. Yes indeed, it takes wisdom to bring love to a spiritual level. Higher power of Neptune is not easily gain.
As for WHY woman fall for heartless creature, we have many school of thoughts. I completely understand, concur and agree with your statement. However, astrologically speaking, it's the structure of their life that causes misery of their love choice. I don't know how to explain in layman terms; it lies with their life.
Cosmic lesson revolves around in circles - heartless man/woman are essential to push and mould their victim into their actual destiny... to grow maturity and wisdom from their setbacks.
We all answer to our own choices.
We are all weakling if life doesn't challenge as in any ways. Only through difficulty, could we truely get stronger.
Cheers -
Is he still evasive about his going-ons?
Does he spend time with u or he cancels dates or secretive with phone calls?
It is his actions that will let u know whether to trust him again.
It will be pointless if u need to check on him everytime. -
A person will not change unless he sees the need and feel that it is for his own good.
Why do gals fall in love with heartless men? It may be the motherly instinct that leads them into believing that they will be able to change them. They always believe that they will be the last woman in their jerk bf's lives and that they have the ability to change them and mould them into their "perfect boyfriend" model. Why not let time be a better guide in your relationship? Give yourself a break. Let time decides if he has change. You can still be frens with him. Observe him. If he doesn't change, at least you will be glad that you din feel hurt again. If he changes, then, you really got yourself a sincere bf now. -
However, my advice is to leave him...
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Any other guy is always a different guy... If you say you won't trust any other guy again, might as well you say you won't trust any other human...?Originally posted by krispy:Are guys nv satisfied? i guess there's no way to get him committed unless he himself is determined to do it rite?
As much as my mind tells me to leave him... my heart dun...
so i'm really at a lost now...
& i'm scared dat i'll nv trust any guy ever again... -
Originally posted by krispy:Dats becos gals treasure love & relationship more den Guys...
Majority of the guys are heartless creature...
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why dont you go out with other guys too?