ATTENTION:HE CHEATED MY FEELINGS
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Ya.. thats. very true.. from the victim's point of view...yes. she wans every gal out there to be wary...but with his pic and hp number is like way too much? It's hard to judge... coz both of u are in a r/s in that time, he never raped u... touching each other in a r/s is common and u didn't tell him how much is too much. He might not know what he was doing was way too much for u. It's common for people to deny that they are in relationship. But it didn't mean he cheat on u. Mayb to him, he dun feel so, coz people got different judgement of situations. U should be firm in rejecting him when he made his advances. If u didn't tell him when to stop, he will feel that u dun mind and make more advances. Isn't what i saying making any sense? Doesn't happen to only guys.. it's the same for gals... we are all humans to think that way.Originally posted by ^HaRu^:pardon me if i say anything wrong.. but tt guy is 17 right? i guess he's at a age whereby most ppl will be curious abt e forbidden fruit.. he'll grow out of it i guess?
anyway.. u shldnt be shaming him n posting his big photo here.. it's just not right??
tt's just my own opinion la.. no offence to u intended..
Please dun think that i am siding him, but i'm a gal also.. i understand how u feel.. but as an outsider, i felt both are at fault. Both of u are too young to handle such situations. Even a 20 something might not be able to react in a sensible way.. Dun say a 17 year old guy, mayb even 40 something man will have affairs.. thats just the ugly side of temptations. It's whether we allow ourselves to fall into it. -
HAHA, some get eaten before it rots lah, but most don't get eaten by then what. Too much eggs leads to high cholestrol!Originally posted by rainee:eat it before it rots
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actually u don't know about rape in a relationship do u? being in a r/s is no grounds for sexual abuse. Its obvious that one party has no respect for the other. maybe u think both are at fault, but then, some cultures think that when a rape happens, its the women's fault for tempting men to rape her ain't it? A victim is a victim. I see no point in being considerate for someone who every bit deserves to be shamed.Originally posted by shirurinu:Ya.. thats. very true.. from the victim's point of view...yes. she wans every gal out there to be wary...but with his pic and hp number is like way too much? It's hard to judge... coz both of u are in a r/s in that time, he never raped u... touching each other in a r/s is common and u didn't tell him how much is too much. He might not know what he was doing was way too much for u. It's common for people to deny that they are in relationship. But it didn't mean he cheat on u. Mayb to him, he dun feel so, coz people got different judgement of situations. U should be firm in rejecting him when he made his advances. If u didn't tell him when to stop, he will feel that u dun mind and make more advances. Isn't what i saying making any sense? Doesn't happen to only guys.. it's the same for gals... we are all humans to think that way.
Please dun think that i am siding him, but i'm a gal also.. i understand how u feel.. but as an outsider, i felt both are at fault. Both of u are too young to handle such situations. Even a 20 something might not be able to react in a sensible way.. Dun say a 17 year old guy, mayb even 40 something man will have affairs.. thats just the ugly side of temptations. It's whether we allow ourselves to fall into it. -
All straight men are rotten..
Re:Oyster
i'll take your comments as a joke -
Develop the skill of picking an egg which is not rotten yetOriginally posted by Quinsy:HAHA, some get eaten before it rots lah, but most don't get eaten by then what. Too much eggs leads to high cholestrol! -
It was only our second date. And he already tried all sorts of ways to get into my pants. I rejected his advences in the cinema amny times but he just kept trying. Yes, i know I was in a relationship, but in any relationship there should be respect for each other. He had no respect for me. And to think that he acted like such a gentleman outside irks me.Originally posted by shirurinu:Ya.. thats. very true.. from the victim's point of view...yes. she wans every gal out there to be wary...but with his pic and hp number is like way too much? It's hard to judge... coz both of u are in a r/s in that time, he never raped u... touching each other in a r/s is common and u didn't tell him how much is too much. He might not know what he was doing was way too much for u. It's common for people to deny that they are in relationship. But it didn't mean he cheat on u. Mayb to him, he dun feel so, coz people got different judgement of situations. U should be firm in rejecting him when he made his advances. If u didn't tell him when to stop, he will feel that u dun mind and make more advances. Isn't what i saying making any sense? Doesn't happen to only guys.. it's the same for gals... we are all humans to think that way.
Please dun think that i am siding him, but i'm a gal also.. i understand how u feel.. but as an outsider, i felt both are at fault. Both of u are too young to handle such situations. Even a 20 something might not be able to react in a sensible way.. Dun say a 17 year old guy, mayb even 40 something man will have affairs.. thats just the ugly side of temptations. It's whether we allow ourselves to fall into it. -
Did you report to the policeOriginally posted by victimgal:IF YOU DO NOT BELIVE ME U CAN ALWAYS TRY TO CHAT HIM UP AND ASK IF HE EVER HAD A STEAD. I AGREED TO BE WITH HIM ONLY AFTER HIS INSISTANCE. HE DRAGGED ME TO THE STAIRWELL AND FORCED KISSED ME AND TOUCHED ME WITHOUT MY CONSENT. I FEEL SO DIRTIED. AND YET WHEN MY GOOD FRIEND POSSED AS A SLUTTY GIRL AND ASKED HIM, HE DENIED EVERYTHING.
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Nope, me too trusting. I buy supermarket eggs. LOL. So far all the eggs I picked in the market are not up to standard. So I prefer supermarket prepakaged eggs!Originally posted by rainee:Develop the skill of picking an egg which is not rotten yet 
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How long have you talked to him before you started going out with him? That's why you need to discuss about this stuff before going out, tell him where you draw the line and stuff. And if he disagrees, it is bye bye to himOriginally posted by victimgal:It was only our second date. And he already tried all sorts of ways to get into my pants. I rejected his advences in the cinema amny times but he just kept trying. Yes, i know I was in a relationship, but in any relationship there should be respect for each other. He had no respect for me. And to think that he acted like such a gentleman outside irks me. -
I'm not saying that she have to be raped by him to be considered the situation to be serious. My point is... she have to place her stands firm in the first place. If she didn't want to be touched, she should have rejected him firmly. She have to get this fact straight so that she won't get into such situations again. Not because he is her bf, so even she dun like it, she still allowed him then feel dirty afterwards. She's only 17, imagine how many more bfs she will have before her marriage? At least one right, she dun protect herself the correct way, she gonna feel the same over and over again. Coz every relationship will proceed to the intimate stage. At least a high percentage of guys will try to make advances. This fact u can't denyOriginally posted by HENG@:actually u don't know about rape in a relationship do u? being in a r/s is no grounds for sexual abuse. Its obvious that one party has no respect for the other. maybe u think both are at fault, but then, some cultures think that when a rape happens, its the women's fault for tempting men to rape her ain't it? A victim is a victim. I see no point in being considerate for someone who every bit deserves to be shamed. -
I talked to him for a few days before agreeing. And he behaved like such a gentlemen. Talking about how much he respects me and how much he will take care of me and how he is a Christian and a choir teacher tat he will not try to do anything funny.Originally posted by rainee:How long have you talked to him before you started going out with him? That's why you need to discuss about this stuff before going out, tell him where you draw the line and stuff. And if he disagrees, it is bye bye to him
He's a 2 faced jerk. -
I can't help but agree with shirurururu post
(sorry i dunno how to spell ur nick) -
I REJECTED HIM SEVERAL TIMES DURING A 2 HOUR MOVIE. HOW FIRM DO YOU WANT ME TO BE? IS THAT NOT FIRM ENOUGH?Originally posted by shirurinu:I'm not saying that she have to be raped by him to be considered the situation to be serious. My point is... she have to place her stands firm in the first place. If she didn't want to be touched, she should have rejected him firmly. She have to get this fact straight so that she won't get into such situations again. Not because he is her bf, so even she dun like it, she still allowed him then feel dirty afterwards. She's only 17, imagine how many more bfs she will have before her marriage? At least one right, she dun protect herself the correct way, she gonna feel the same over and over again. Coz every relationship will proceed to the intimate stage. At least a high percentage of guys will try to make advances. This fact u can't deny -
ok.. i see what u r driving at... just remember.. in future.. if u dun feel comfortable with guy's advances, tell him u dun like it. and he should stop to show u respect. If he couldn't respect u.. it's good bye.. I think this is straightforward enough. dun feel it will embarassed him or u. Coz ultimately u have to protect urself.Originally posted by victimgal:It was only our second date. And he already tried all sorts of ways to get into my pants. I rejected his advences in the cinema amny times but he just kept trying. Yes, i know I was in a relationship, but in any relationship there should be respect for each other. He had no respect for me. And to think that he acted like such a gentleman outside irks me.
If such straightforward warnings can't get him to the right track... please say goodbye immediately to him and never see him again! -
Don't be crazy...i mean FOR ME as a christian , i do have a sense of humour in the forums..but when it comes to real life...i do act serious 1...Originally posted by victimgal:I talked to him for a few days before agreeing. And he behaved like such a gentlemen. Talking about how much he respects me and how much he will take care of me and how he is a Christian and a choir teacher tat he will not try to do anything funny.
He's a 2 faced jerk.
Ive once told my ex-gf b4 really going into a relationship , that i will never touch her or go beyond the morals and ethical values of normal human beings...would do
I have honoured her with my promises
I admit, some christians are hypocrites....... but anyway....
these 2 events doesn't mean all of them are tat bad =.= -
Well I guess it is good you found out this early, imagine getting into a deeper shit with him?Originally posted by victimgal:I talked to him for a few days before agreeing. And he behaved like such a gentlemen. Talking about how much he respects me and how much he will take care of me and how he is a Christian and a choir teacher tat he will not try to do anything funny.
He's a 2 faced jerk.
Take it as a good experience and move on. This world is full with such people, and with this experience, I am sure you will be able to deal with them better the next time
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If you know that he's like that and strongly detest it, why did you continue to go on the relationship with him?Originally posted by victimgal:It was only our second date. And he already tried all sorts of ways to get into my pants. I rejected his advences in the cinema amny times but he just kept trying. Yes, i know I was in a relationship, but in any relationship there should be respect for each other. He had no respect for me. And to think that he acted like such a gentleman outside irks me. -
NO, I DID NOT. BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE IF THIS CAN BE MADE A CASE. I DONT WANT TO MAKE A TOO BIG FUSS OUT OF IT AS MY PARENTS DO NOT KNOW OF IT. ONLY MY FRIEND KNOWS. I JUST WANT TO EXPOSE HIM AND TO TELL WARN OTHERS OF PEOPLE LIKE HIM.Originally posted by Devil1976:Did you report to the police -
Welcome to the real world gal... this tells u that never trust 100% of what people tell u especially with people u have never met before, with no credentials from ur friends. And if it's only the 2nd date, how come he's ur bf already?Originally posted by victimgal:I talked to him for a few days before agreeing. And he behaved like such a gentlemen. Talking about how much he respects me and how much he will take care of me and how he is a Christian and a choir teacher tat he will not try to do anything funny.
He's a 2 faced jerk. -
i take it that u missed the point that she's not a willing girlfriend to begin with? and that some boys are very good at applying emotional blackmail to girls to get what they want, and then taking advantage of their inexperience with situations like that. if a guy has to make an advance, instead of it being a spontaneous thing, then i don't feel it's a respectful relationship to begin with. that fact YOU can't deny.Originally posted by shirurinu:I'm not saying that she have to be raped by him to be considered the situation to be serious. My point is... she have to place her stands firm in the first place. If she didn't want to be touched, she should have rejected him firmly. She have to get this fact straight so that she won't get into such situations again. Not because he is her bf, so even she dun like it, she still allowed him then feel dirty afterwards. She's only 17, imagine how many more bfs she will have before her marriage? At least one right, she dun protect herself the correct way, she gonna feel the same over and over again. Coz every relationship will proceed to the intimate stage. At least a high percentage of guys will try to make advances. This fact u can't deny -
I DID NOT. I DUMPED HIM AFTER THAT. HE WAS STILL GENTLEMANLY ON THE FIRST DATE. ITS WAS THE SECOND DATE THAT SHOWED HIS TRUE COLOURS.Originally posted by Devil1976:If you know that he's like that and strongly detest it, why did you continue to go on the relationship with him? -
But you are already making a big fuss out of it now?Originally posted by victimgal:NO, I DID NOT. BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE IF THIS CAN BE MADE A CASE. I DONT WANT TO MAKE A TOO BIG FUSS OUT OF IT AS MY PARENTS DO NOT KNOW OF IT. ONLY MY FRIEND KNOWS. I JUST WANT TO EXPOSE HIM AND TO TELL WARN OTHERS OF PEOPLE LIKE HIM.
Without any actual people to verify against him, just through a nick. How convincing do you think you can be? -
Anyway, my thing is that, you all just stead..maybe from his point of view, you all already know each other well enough etc...
in chinese we call it "know each other very shou ler"
hk care lah.....
Did he molest you or something?
Just treat it as a lesson learnt lah..
When someone have a gf, you must love her so much that u will think of her future...
If she ever has a husband in the future...imagine urself as a husband.. treat her and respect her in a way that you preserve her innocence and chastity ... -
relack la....he's a jerkOriginally posted by victimgal:NO, I DID NOT. BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE IF THIS CAN BE MADE A CASE. I DONT WANT TO MAKE A TOO BIG FUSS OUT OF IT AS MY PARENTS DO NOT KNOW OF IT. ONLY MY FRIEND KNOWS. I JUST WANT TO EXPOSE HIM AND TO TELL WARN OTHERS OF PEOPLE LIKE HIM.
tat's a truth....
cool dwn lor*
i'm prone to seein capital letters.... -
im surprised. how come some people seem intent on giving the victim a hard time instead? perhaps they feel she's not suffered enough mental trauma?