Need advice
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Wow..how long have u known her? wat do u know from her previous relationships? diff. lifestyles can b of a v big prob, if u wanna take e r.s into a long term one.
Speaking from a gals point of view,
I wouldnt treat someone i like tis way.
does she wans anything from u? money? time? companionship? lust (hey gals can b the player too nowadays)?
if..she can do tis to u, she can also ask intimatcy from anyone else...
prob u needa slow down or halt e r.s for e moment..think bout wat u really wan out of tis r.s...
does she makes u happy? appreciates and understands u? y do u even need her in ur life? -
Generally, if anyone who would use insisting or persuading to make you do something for them.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:problem is the hanging up.. she will insist i don't hang up. what should i do?
Will only mean that they want to control you, or feel good to be in control.
When they do, they'll think they can do anything to you and you wouldnt reject; including messing you up like what she did - letting her friend screw her?
Whatever it is, she is going to extreme, because she is telling you that she's easy to the point where her friends can bed her.
Nightsky87 may be right, your interest and affection towards her is fighting your logic.
_________
Her value is definitely different from yours.
She believes in sexual relationship before a formal bgr.
while you believe in Sex after marriage. What contrast it is!!!
Seems like you're in a messy friendship with a complicated girl.
And it's going to mess you up like a puppet.
The best solution is to 'play along' but not your feelings, i doubt you can make it leh.
All the best
Cheers -
well...maybe she thought u didnt want her cos she's not attractive enough...ego slap.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:i really don't get it though. why would she be sad if i didn't want to have sex.
i thought girls would appreciate me wanting to be totally commited to her before sex.
i always believed in sex before marraige
she actually cried when i refused to enter her. =/
she's just playing games. dont let her manipulate you. -
why does these things happen to me...
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She means something to you, thats why you are troubled.
If you decided to accept her as your gf, then, you will have to be mentally prepared that you may faced with all the situations that the forumers have warned you.
Do not think that love can change a person. If it does, its a bonus. If it doesn't, it remains quo status. If you are prepared with the worst possible outcome, then, you should treat it positively.
Cheers. -
It will be good experience.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:why does these things happen to me...
So you'll get to see different kinds of people and know that this society is full of people who doesn't think like you.
Cheers -
she just sent me an mms of her pic at her cousin's place
and a message
"haha, you'll love this, i'm sure! your pretty little darling always. =) don't angry le lah.. i'll always be ur little pretty one, to love and to treasure.. and i want you to know i love you too. don't be angry already, please, okay? i love you darling.."
so how now? -
Bro,Originally posted by dumbdumb!:she just sent me an mms of her pic at her cousin's place
and a message
"haha, you'll love this, i'm sure! your pretty little darling always. =) don't angry le lah.. i'll always be ur little pretty one, to love and to treasure.. and i want you to know i love you too. don't be angry already, please, okay? i love you darling.."
so how now?
Basic question #1:::
Are you in a formal relationship???
Where are you standing???
I read liao confuse le....please answer.
Are you in a relationship with this girl or not?
Cheers -
official.. no.
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Then unoffically leh?Originally posted by dumbdumb!:official.. no.
Wah, i think she's not the only one who's complicating things oh....
It's more than meets the eye!!
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Bro,
i think i'll just cut the chase.
You buey tahan her one.
Hai....you won't understand what i'm saying until you experience it.
Cheers -
I think i understand.Originally posted by M©+square:Bro,
i think i'll just cut the chase.
You buey tahan her one.
Hai....you won't understand what i'm saying until you experience it.
Cheers -
If both of you are in an unofficial relationship.. then why would she behave that way?Originally posted by dumbdumb!:official.. no.
I hope you dont mind me saying this, but I feel that you have already made up your mind. Whatever we say may not be right or wrong, but ultimately its your life and the relationship belongs to you and her. How you want things to turn out will all depend on you.
If you are vexed about the values which differ between you and her, then it is something that us at AA cannot do anything about.
Right now, what you need to think about what is it that you are unhappy about, and how to solve that solution. I also getting blur le. LOL
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Yup, as all of them have said, she wants to be in control. But looking at it from another angle, regarding the sex part, it could be because she needs to feel loved. There may be a part of her which feels insecure, and maybe by having you love her, make her feel better.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:I've been seeing this girl recently. We both sort of liked each other, and have been going out regularly. Although we're not official a couple, due to various reasons. She's afraid of commiting to me, while I don't mind waiting.
she can be really sweet and kind and gentle. she's really talkative although sometimes she can be self centered a little.
the main problem is that, due to different lifestyle, alot of friction between us.
she always finds fault when i can't accompany her chat till wee hours in the morning. I'm serving NS. Also, phone bill have been very ex. $500 was my last bill.
also, while we have been intimate, she was upset when i didn't want to go all the way with her.
due to this, she told me a friend of hers wanted to screw her, and she agreed to let him.
of course i'd be upset about this.
although we're not official, but this is kinda a first relationship for me. letting go is really hard. but what should i do?
But the thing about letting her friend screw her is a bit too much. If she really loves you, she would never say anything like that...
Maybe you should look at her in the eyes, then ask her what she really wants..
Regarding the $500 bills, really. Just get a free incoming line for like $30 max and ask her to call you. That's what everyone's doing anyway. -
Originally posted by dumbdumb!:I've been seeing this girl recently. We both sort of liked each other, and have been going out regularly. Although we're not official a couple, due to various reasons. She's afraid of commiting to me, while I don't mind waiting.
she can be really sweet and kind and gentle. she's really talkative although sometimes she can be self centered a little.
the main problem is that, due to different lifestyle, alot of friction between us.
she always finds fault when i can't accompany her chat till wee hours in the morning. I'm serving NS. Also, phone bill have been very ex. $500 was my last bill.
also, while we have been intimate, she was upset when i didn't want to go all the way with her.
due to this, she told me a friend of hers wanted to screw her, and she agreed to let him.
of course i'd be upset about this.
although we're not official, but this is kinda a first relationship for me. letting go is really hard. but what should i do?
This is girl is not a typical girl you find on others. In fact, she has developed a certain attitude and belief towards Love and Relationship which you have to understand that FIRST before you could put any logics into your plight.
If she has strings of ex before you, chances are, you are also part of this statistic. Regardless, she is probably a Siren (AOS), so if you are inexperienced in handling such characters... I don't advocate you trying her out, especially if you are looking for serious relationship without complication.
She has shown some blatant aversion to commitment. It doesn't matter what actually happened; what matters is the ideology she is equipped now. When we talked about the inability to commit but has the ability to be intimate... this actually revealed an insidious truth about her current self - you probably hold no chance and even if you did, you merely fulfill a certain need that is visibly lacking in her emotional structure.
She is a Predator; a woman indulged in mercy sex. The roles are exchanged and you felt the pressure of her being on the dominating side. It stultified your masculine position and you wonder how should you react when she come aggressive.
IMHO, you are spell-bounded by her well crafted seduction spell. I don't know you personally... I also cannot say that you are in love for sure and I believe that you won't know the answer as well. Your coming tracks are perilous; you are not trained to handle them. You can ignore me and press on, but I am quite sure you won't survive this game ultimately (because my impression of you is a good person. Don't ask me why... I just felt it this way... and a good person will definitely perish in this scenario, with given time).
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
This post would provide you with 50% of the possible answer you're looking for. And 50% is quite alot in this case. This is girl is not a typical girl you find on others. In fact, she has developed a certain attitude and belief towards Love and Relationship which you have to understand that FIRST before you could put any logics into your plight.
If she has strings of ex before you, chances are, you are also part of this statistic. Regardless, she is probably a Siren (AOS), so if you are inexperienced in handling such characters... I don't advocate you trying her out, especially if you are looking for serious relationship without complication.
She has shown some blatant aversion to commitment. It doesn't matter what actually happened; what matters is the ideology she is equipped now. When we talked about the inability to commit but has the ability to be intimate... this actually revealed an insidious truth about her current self - you probably hold no chance and even if you did, you merely fulfill a certain need that is visibly lacking in her emotional structure.
She is a Predator; [b]a woman indulged in mercy sex. The roles are exchanged and you felt the pressure of her being on the dominating side. It stultified your masculine position and you wonder how should you react when she come aggressive.
IMHO, you are spell-bounded by her well crafted seduction spell. I don't know you personally... I also cannot say that you are in love for sure and I believe that you won't know the answer as well. Your coming tracks are perilous; you are not trained to handle them. You can ignore me and press on, but I am quite sure you won't survive this game ultimately (because my impression of you is a good person. Don't ask me why... I just felt it this way... and a good person will definitely perish in this scenario, with given time).
Cheers[/b] -
happens to anyone..Originally posted by dumbdumb!:why does these things happen to me... -
Not all girls think the same way. How old is she?Originally posted by dumbdumb!:i really don't get it though. why would she be sad if i didn't want to have sex.
i thought girls would appreciate me wanting to be totally commited to her before sex.
i always believed in sex before marraige
she actually cried when i refused to enter her. =/
She might be thinking that you don't love her enough.. Ain't serious with her.. Ain't attracted enough to her body.. Don't care enough about how she feels... Too many alternate possibilities... And the list can just goes on...
What's her star sign?
What's yours? -
Once again i will disagree.Originally posted by FBI:happens to anyone..
You're still young to understand this fact, that not everyone will have the same or similiar experience because not every of those ladies will like any guys they see on the street.
They have certain acquired taste and preferance.
Cheers -
Could we have included LOVE in this situation when it's not even a formal relationship?Originally posted by Devil1976:Not all girls think the same way. How old is she?
She might be thinking that you don't love her enough.. Ain't serious with her.. Ain't attracted enough to her body.. Don't care enough about how she feels... Too many alternate possibilities... And the list can just goes on...
What's her star sign?
What's yours?
Heated Passion i prefer to put it as.
Cheers -
U say she's afraid of committing to u. To me it seems to suggest that she is not really interested in u. If she's truly interested in u, she will definitely be committed to u.Originally posted by dumbdumb!:I've been seeing this girl recently. We both sort of liked each other, and have been going out regularly. Although we're not official a couple, due to various reasons. She's afraid of commiting to me, while I don't mind waiting.
she can be really sweet and kind and gentle. she's really talkative although sometimes she can be self centered a little.
the main problem is that, due to different lifestyle, alot of friction between us.
she always finds fault when i can't accompany her chat till wee hours in the morning. I'm serving NS. Also, phone bill have been very ex. $500 was my last bill.
also, while we have been intimate, she was upset when i didn't want to go all the way with her.
due to this, she told me a friend of hers wanted to screw her, and she agreed to let him.
of course i'd be upset about this.
although we're not official, but this is kinda a first relationship for me. letting go is really hard. but what should i do?
then u say she always find fault with u... if that suggests anything it can also mean she is not interested in u. Gals who are interested in u will try not to find fault with u. ie they will respect u.
Ya u were wrong when u did not go all the way with her. If u had, she would have been ur gf.
There are gals who can be so nice to u and yet not interested in u.
It seems to me it's better to avoid this gal. She's not worth it. There are better ones out there. After throwin tantrums at u and tellin u her friend wanted to screw her do u think u shd continue to pursue her?? She is tryin to tell u to get lost. -
so what?!! It doesnt mean anything. Words mean nothing. Dun let it cloud ur judgement. Only see her actions brudderOriginally posted by dumbdumb!:she just sent me an mms of her pic at her cousin's place
and a message
"haha, you'll love this, i'm sure! your pretty little darling always. =) don't angry le lah.. i'll always be ur little pretty one, to love and to treasure.. and i want you to know i love you too. don't be angry already, please, okay? i love you darling.."
so how now? -
ooo.... sex buddy.. such relationship are good.. no strings attached and your sex demands are met until you meet a girl you are serious about.. hehe..
well.. if she is interested in you, i think her sex escapades will be no more , until you start dating her. for now, both are you are not accountable to each other.
you must between 19-22 since you are serving NS. I believe she falls in that age range too. both of you are very young. no point committing to truly serious relationship. chances are she's not going to be the last girl in your life. if a girl chooses to let you screw, it's her choice. -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Agree!!! This is girl is not a typical girl you find on others. In fact, she has developed a certain attitude and belief towards Love and Relationship which you have to understand that FIRST before you could put any logics into your plight.
If she has strings of ex before you, chances are, you are also part of this statistic. Regardless, she is probably a Siren (AOS), so if you are inexperienced in handling such characters... I don't advocate you trying her out, especially if you are looking for serious relationship without complication.
She has shown some blatant aversion to commitment. It doesn't matter what actually happened; what matters is the ideology she is equipped now. When we talked about the inability to commit but has the ability to be intimate... this actually revealed an insidious truth about her current self - you probably hold no chance and even if you did, you merely fulfill a certain need that is visibly lacking in her emotional structure.
She is a Predator; [b]a woman indulged in mercy sex. The roles are exchanged and you felt the pressure of her being on the dominating side. It stultified your masculine position and you wonder how should you react when she come aggressive.
IMHO, you are spell-bounded by her well crafted seduction spell. I don't know you personally... I also cannot say that you are in love for sure and I believe that you won't know the answer as well. Your coming tracks are perilous; you are not trained to handle them. You can ignore me and press on, but I am quite sure you won't survive this game ultimately (because my impression of you is a good person. Don't ask me why... I just felt it this way... and a good person will definitely perish in this scenario, with given time).
Cheers[/b] Couldn't be more right.... -
what a strange girl! find another girl la...singapore so many girls...>"<