how to save a rushed courtship?
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It's true right.Originally posted by huiz:how come u noe so much abt gals?
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hmm, bladez situation sounds almost exactly like what I'm facing, but mine is already passed 1 year and yea I'm still sort of passively courting the girl currently haiz.
A couple of pointers as I'm not that experienced but I hope they will help you in someway. =X
It's not going to be easy to regain back to the friendship level prior your rushed confession to her, probably will take a couple of months. During this couple of months my suggestion is to remain contact as mere friendship level. Meaning only meet her or ask her out when it's necessary. Refrain topics that deal with bgr. During group outings disperse your attention to the rest of the group instead of just focusing on her alone.
Also, highlight to her that you are sorry that you rushed things and never take her feelings into consideration. It takes two hands to clap and it will be better that you both get to know each other more first. Say you are not expecting an answer now and let things take their own course. -
hey for ur situation, do u think u stand a high chance of getting her out alone for dates?Originally posted by NekoRin:hmm, bladez situation sounds almost exactly like what I'm facing, but mine is already passed 1 year and yea I'm still sort of passively courting the girl currently haiz.
A couple of pointers as I'm not that experienced but I hope they will help you in someway. =X
It's not going to be easy to regain back to the friendship level prior your rushed confession to her, probably will take a couple of months. During this couple of months my suggestion is to remain contact as mere friendship level. Meaning only meet her or ask her out when it's necessary. Refrain topics that deal with bgr. During group outings disperse your attention to the rest of the group instead of just focusing on her alone.
Also, highlight to her that you are sorry that you rushed things and never take her feelings into consideration. It takes two hands to clap and it will be better that you both get to know each other more first. Say you are not expecting an answer now and let things take their own course. -
Even it's true. They will still fall into the same trap, over and over, generations after generations.Originally posted by dokono:It's true right.
Cheers -
That's kinda sad. Guys should learn not repeat their mistakes.Originally posted by M©+square:Even it's true. They will still fall into the same trap, over and over, generations after generations.
Cheers -
Originally posted by dokono:That's kinda sad. Guys should learn not repeat their mistakes.
Until they got scalded, then they'll remember.
But hey! There's another hole that looks good, not so obvious like the last round. Maybe this one won't kanna la....
Then men jumps in again.
Cheers -
How long do they need to get scalded before they do get the idea haha? Not for me definitely.Originally posted by M©+square:
Until they got scalded, then they'll remember.
But hey! There's another hole that looks good, not so obvious like the last round. Maybe this one won't kanna la....
Then men jumps in again.
Cheers -
sad to say no~Originally posted by dokono:hey for ur situation, do u think u stand a high chance of getting her out alone for dates?
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forget abt her la brudder.Originally posted by NekoRin:sad to say no~
There are so many gals out there. Once u see a new one u like, the old one is meaningless.
U are just depriving urself the chance of knowing so many other gals who are waiting for u, those u like and they like u as well. -
I'm going to end it during this Vday. She's like giving me alot of mixed signals and bad thing is when I ask all I get is "I can't say yes or no" answersOriginally posted by dokono:forget abt her la brudder.
There are so many gals out there. Once u see a new one u like, the old one is meaningless.
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Gals who like u will not give u mixed signals. U know what? She doesnt know how to tell u to back off. If she is really attracted to u she will make all the time in the world to have a date with u.Originally posted by NekoRin:I'm going to end it during this Vday. She's like giving me alot of mixed signals and bad thing is when I ask all I get is "I can't say yes or no" answers
Yes be decisive and end it. -
Yea once I completed the Vday gift for her.Originally posted by dokono:Gals who like u will not give u mixed signals. U know what? She doesnt know how to tell u to back off. If she is really attracted to u she will make all the time in the world to have a date with u.
Yes be decisive and end it.
Hmm the line in red is interesting.... hmm *ponders -
Yes even if her pet dog dies. She will make time for u still.Originally posted by NekoRin:Yea once I completed the Vday gift for her.
Hmm the line in red is interesting.... hmm *ponders -
Haha~Originally posted by dokono:Yes even if her pet dog dies. She will make time for u still.
For my case I'll see how it goes. I can't start looking at other girls until I'm fully convinced that there is no hope in the courtship, that's how dumb I am lolx. Hence this Vday is my last 'attempt' to her, I've been passive in the chase for the past couple of months. -
dude..she ain't worth it from wat i have seen.... but than dun think u r gonna listen anyway so i ZIP
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U can try risking getting hurt again. Im not tryin to splash cold water on u but the hard truth is once u are not considered before u have no chance again, really.Originally posted by NekoRin:Haha~
For my case I'll see how it goes. I can't start looking at other girls until I'm fully convinced that there is no hope in the courtship, that's how dumb I am lolx. Hence this Vday is my last 'attempt' to her, I've been passive in the chase for the past couple of months. -
Worth differs from person to person. I'm open to all commentsOriginally posted by harryryan:dude..she ain't worth it from wat i have seen.... but than dun think u r gonna listen anyway so i ZIP 
I don't like ending things by own assumption. It's best to just directly say a 'no' rather than hanging me up in the air. -
she dun wan to be seen as the bad guy, u get it?Originally posted by NekoRin:Worth differs from person to person. I'm open to all comments
I don't like ending things by own assumption. It's best to just directly say a 'no' rather than hanging me up in the air. -
Hmm, I certainly won't mind getting hurt again since I'm already torn and battered from the mixed signals she has been giving which includes me helping and supporting her to reject another suitor of hers which is pestering herOriginally posted by dokono:U can try risking getting hurt again. Im not tryin to splash cold water on u but the hard truth is once u are not considered before u have no chance again, really. -
Yea, if only she can reject me like she rejects others so directlyOriginally posted by dokono:she dun wan to be seen as the bad guy, u get it?
I think it's just me that I don't want to regret in future cuz I never put in enough effort in the courtship -
still it doesnt mean she likes u. worse she's using u.Originally posted by NekoRin:Hmm, I certainly won't mind getting hurt again since I'm already torn and battered from the mixed signals she has been giving which includes me helping and supporting her to reject another suitor of hers which is pestering her -
Yup, actually I know the answer more or less. Just wanted to make my heart close this chapter. And to give her probably my last custom Vday gift to her.Originally posted by dokono:still it doesnt mean she likes u. worse she's using u
Using me is unlikely. It just happens that the other suitor is within the same circle of friends with me and her. Feel she is immature in handling relationships too haiz -
hijacker spotted. haha.
alright la. i also dont know what to do. read other people de experience. hopefully i can learn something.
btw i am a sorry kind of guy. everything and anything that goes wrong, i just say sorry. sometimes i mean it, sometimes i dont. but who cares? as long as this matter is resolved. i dont care. -
Sometimes when u say sorry too much, it will lose its value, even if u really mean it...Why even get into a situation where u need to say sorry in the first place? Yes mistakes are made to be learnt but if u can prevent mistakes from happening, isn't that better?Originally posted by bladez87:hijacker spotted. haha.
alright la. i also dont know what to do. read other people de experience. hopefully i can learn something.
btw i am a sorry kind of guy. everything and anything that goes wrong, i just say sorry. sometimes i mean it, sometimes i dont. but who cares? as long as this matter is resolved. i dont care. -
haha good point. hmm. no la. as in. haha.
o well. i shall take note that point. only say when you mean it.
often i say it to just end the matter.o well. must learn not to make mistakes.
first time do wrong is mistake.
2nd time onwards is no longer a mistake
is known as
repeated mistake...