GF 3 months pregnant.. no money for abortion
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actually it might just be possible to not tell the parents. or maybe tell very much later when it wont matterOriginally posted by rainee:Do you think she can keep this forever from her parents?
The baby might have a chance at a better life. Doesn't mean if you have suffered through life, he/she will also have to go thru the same road. Don't assume that you think life sucks, everyone else will also think that way. -
I suggest you don't try to justify what you're going to do.Originally posted by neverendingtrauma:1) i know abortion rips its body apart n it can feel pain bla bla ive seen pics
2)what for she miss poly for half a year and let her mother know and hate her more just to let the baby be born into fake parents? for HER SAKE its much better to abort n continue with poly without parents knowing .
3) give it a chance at LIFE?? read my above post about how life sucks with much more negative feelings than happiness and then forced to study and work and conform for many many years and then 50% he may spend eternal torture in hell NOT BEING BORN IS MUCH BETTER OK I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN into this eternal forced curse
Just do whatever you feel is ok between your gf and you.
3 months le....don't drag. -
My view here is that one should not bring a life to the world if you cant take charge of it...If these kids become parents they will not know what to do with their lives..and people will guide them according to their convinience.
So be mature we all eat eggs thats abortion.
Bring a life to give proper care and raize a good citizen...not just bring a child with no future at all and cry through out the life as pregnancy doesnt make you parents its raising a child makes you one. -
Let's hope if she were to go through the abortion, there wont be any complications then. But to go thru the abortion, don't need the permission from an adult meh? Can just go into a clinic and say I want to abort my baby, esp if the girl is only 17?Originally posted by hisoka:actually it might just be possible to not tell the parents. or maybe tell very much later when it wont matter -
and what makes u think every life will suck..its how a person lives his/her life that decides whether it sucks or not..Originally posted by neverendingtrauma:1) i know abortion rips its body apart n it can feel pain bla bla ive seen pics
2)what for she miss poly for half a year and let her mother know and hate her more just to let the baby be born into fake parents? for HER SAKE its much better to abort n continue with poly without parents knowing .
3) give it a chance at LIFE?? read my above post about how life sucks with much more negative feelings than happiness and then forced to study and work and conform for many many years and then 50% he may spend eternal torture in hell NOT BEING BORN IS MUCH BETTER OK I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN into this eternal forced curse -
no idea le that one. i understand by law below 18 or 21 need parent consent, btu then always got left hand ruleOriginally posted by rainee:Let's hope if she were to go through the abortion, there wont be any complications then. But to go thru the abortion, don't need the permission from an adult meh? Can just go into a clinic and say I want to abort my baby, esp if the girl is only 17?
ok not that i encourageto go to disreputable abortions since that will result in additional dangers. just raisingthe possibility.
maybe there are some options that are offered on condition of annonymity or something. since they guy said need that amount i assumed he checked. -
eating eggs=abortion?Originally posted by peppercrab:My view here is that one should not bring a life to the world if you cant take charge of it...If these kids become parents they will not know what to do with their lives..and people will guide them according to their convinience.
So be mature we all eat eggs thats abortion.
Bring a life to give proper care and raize a good citizen...not just bring a child with no future at all and cry through out the life as pregnancy doesnt make you parents its raising a child makes you one.
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Well, you are saying that having a sucky life of studying and working is worse than having your whole body, head and limbs crushed and ripped apart.Originally posted by neverendingtrauma:1) i know abortion rips its body apart n it can feel pain bla bla ive seen pics
2)what for she miss poly for half a year and let her mother know and hate her more just to let the baby be born into fake parents? for HER SAKE its much better to abort n continue with poly without parents knowing .
3) give it a chance at LIFE?? read my above post about how life sucks with much more negative feelings than happiness and then forced to study and work and conform for many many years and then 50% he may spend eternal torture in hell NOT BEING BORN IS MUCH BETTER OK I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN into this eternal forced curse
Hmmm, interesting.
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means going to an unauthorized clinic? That will make it more dangerous for the girl then...Originally posted by hisoka:no idea le that one. i understand by law below 18 or 21 need parent consent, btu then always got left hand rule
seriously, pls consider all this. -
revised my post.Originally posted by rainee:means going to an unauthorized clinic? That will make it more dangerous for the girl then...
seriously, pls consider all this.
btw any one knows the conditions for abortion? i remember reading about some schemes that allow pple to just abort no questions asked but not sure if its in sg 
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I am not sure abt how it works in Singapore...Originally posted by hisoka:revised my post. btw any one knows the conditions for abortion? i remember reading about some schemes that allow pple to just abort no questions asked but not sure if its in sg
but usually those "shady" clinics won't ask too many questions one...as long as u have money, they will do it...
but of cos have to consider about how risky it really is...if done improperly, the girl might suffer internal bleeding, develop cysts that might cause her to have tumor later in life, or worse still, she might not be able to have anymore babies once she get married next time...
dun ask how i know all this...someone close to me went thru this once, and i know how horrifying it really was...so dats y i am asking the threadstarter to seek adult assistance... -
If I remember correctly, in SG, underaged girls can get abortions without the consent of the parents.Originally posted by hisoka:revised my post. btw any one knows the conditions for abortion? i remember reading about some schemes that allow pple to just abort no questions asked but not sure if its in sg
Even so, I would strongly suggest to the threadstarter that both sets of parents be informed. Sooner or later, they're going to find out about the pregnancy.
You can't hide things like this forever. Sooner or later they're going to ask about why she seems rather wane and listless in the days after the abortion procedure. Sooner or later, they're going to ask her "Hey, you seem troubled... what's on your mind?" and she may end up blurting out to them the full story after much persuasion. They may also come across the medical bills and Medisave statements in the mail. You're just going to delay the inevitable if you don't tell them now.
They may get angry now, but I imagine that they'll get much, much angrier later on if they find out (which is very likely) that she got pregnant and aborted their grandchild without consulting them. Bear that in mind: it's not only your child which you're thinking of aborting; it's their grandchild as well.
I know it's a tough choice. Be a man and face up to your responsibilities. . If it means that you have to face up to your parents and hers, then you're going to have to be responsible enough to do that. If she has to skip poly for several months, then she has to carry out that responsibility.
The two of you made the choice to commit 'that act' a few months ago. I'm not judging you based on your committing of that act. All I'm saying is that the least you can do now is to accept the responsibility of your actions by informing both your parents.
Forgive me for being so brutally direct, but that's the whole truth.
Because I can tell you for sure - abortion is not just about going to the doctor for a prescription and going to the pharmacy counter for the medications. There are a lot of other factors - both physical and psychological. It's not a decision to be taken lightly... which is why I still say you have to consult both sets of parents. If it means not going through the abortion, then so be it. -
The thread starter is free to choose what he wants to do though personally I feel adoption is a better option.
For anyone contemplating abortion or just keen to know more about it, just google "Abortion" and the relevant key words eg abortion side effects, moral/political/medical/psychological/social issues etc.
No harm learning more to widen your pespectives on it. -
oh well according to fudge can go those sunny clinics and do. so thats one problem solved.Originally posted by rainee:I am not sure abt how it works in Singapore...
but usually those "shady" clinics won't ask too many questions one...as long as u have money, they will do it...
but of cos have to consider about how risky it really is...if done improperly, the girl might suffer internal bleeding, develop cysts that might cause her to have tumor later in life, or worse still, she might not be able to have anymore babies once she get married next time...
dun ask how i know all this...someone close to me went thru this once, and i know how horrifying it really was...so dats y i am asking the threadstarter to seek adult assistance...
i personally feel there are bad and good to both aborting and giving birth. don't know which is worse though. rationally i feel that abortion is the better way. -
I am not against abortion...it is just that I feel they need to at least let their parents know.Originally posted by hisoka:oh well according to fudge can go those sunny clinics and do. so thats one problem solved.
i personally feel there are bad and good to both aborting and giving birth. don't know which is worse though. rationally i feel that abortion is the better way. -
Ignorance is bliss...Originally posted by rainee:I am not against abortion...it is just that I feel they need to at least let their parents know.
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I did say that the girl can go for abortion at an authorised clinic without the parents' consent. However, I certainly advise against keeping her parents in the dark at the same time.Originally posted by hisoka:oh well according to fudge can go those sunny clinics and do. so thats one problem solved.
i personally feel there are bad and good to both aborting and giving birth. don't know which is worse though. rationally i feel that abortion is the better way.
I can't speak for the girl, but I know for a fact that she's going to keep that long, dark secret in her heart for the rest of her life. Not a very pleasant thought, methinks. -
Prayers for the couple please.... they need it...
And the poor kid.. -
I suggest you keep the baby for now..
Inform both of your parents while it's still early.. see what advice they have for you..
As for the future, if really cannot cope with all the stress/financial strain.. then let others adopt the baby..
Anyway it's all up to you.. everyone else can only give advice..
Good Luck anyway
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Hey rainee, if this is so, care to explain why are there pro-life groups and anti-life groups? Not trying to be difficult here. Just that this sentence don't make sense. I think majority of us would have agreed that a foetus is a life, and God knows if she has more than one. By aborting, you may be killing more than one. Just consider.Originally posted by rainee:I remember this quote I once read...
"Those who are not against abortion, are those who have already been born into this world."
How can you be so sure that your gf is not having twins or triplets or more than that? How many lives if you want to kill if it is true? While I admit the rarity, you never know. You are 18 already, and I believe you have studied probability. Go calculate it. No matter how rare, it will still happen. It's only whether you want to take the gamble or not.
Again, seek adult advice, whether or not they are your parents. At least they would be able to analyze this whole situation with you in details, and offer some suggestions. If you insist on abortion after hearing them out, then go ahead. At least you have heard them explain.
Remember one thing though: Humans never regret until they have done something. You may not regret killing your own child/children now, but a few more years/decades down the road, you will see why. -
Physical pain aside, I don't think you have the psycological stress your gf will face after abortion. Some women, thinking that abortion will solve problems, instead sink into depression. You should go and read the newspapers, or just go any couselling centre. There are classified cases over there.Originally posted by neverendingtrauma:1) i know abortion rips its body apart n it can feel pain bla bla ive seen pics
2)what for she miss poly for half a year and let her mother know and hate her more just to let the baby be born into fake parents? for HER SAKE its much better to abort n continue with poly without parents knowing .
3) give it a chance at LIFE?? read my above post about how life sucks with much more negative feelings than happiness and then forced to study and work and conform for many many years and then 50% he may spend eternal torture in hell NOT BEING BORN IS MUCH BETTER OK I WISH I WAS NEVER BORN into this eternal forced curse
It's your personal view on life. I think many people also had the same feeling. It's only after some experience that you will learn to enjoy life, learn to appreciate life. Just because you don't have one doesn't mean you should deprive another one of doing the same.
With or without abortion, she will still miss poly education for a period of time. The calendar has changed. With abortion, how can you be sure that she won't sink into a depression? Depression can be long. For all you know, she took 3 years to recover, totally missing poly education. Without abortion and assuming she will carry it to full term, she will start her education around October. From what I know, some polys do conduct October exercises, for people who missed the JAE or could not get into the poly. -
Actually any adult they trust will do.Originally posted by rainee:I am not against abortion...it is just that I feel they need to at least let their parents know. -
Think of the future of you and your gf. If you abort now, and there is after effect, and she cant get pregnant. What will you feel? Have your gf agreed to abortion?
The best solution will be seeking your parents. Even you will get the worst lecture from them, its only tempoary. And they cant change the fact that you are the child's father. And when parents have grandchildren, their feeling towards the past will be different.
Even you do not matter about what the bible says. Hope you will be wise to think about the future. A moment of folly, u regret for the rest of your life even though how negative you look towards your life. spare a thought for a new life. -
Well, I think that sentence is referring to ppl who think of abortion as an easy way out to solve the unwanted pregnancies problem. For me, it is actually an easy way out, but it might bring up even more problems in the long run. So instead of running away, face the problem bravely and solve it for once and for all.Originally posted by ndmmxiaomayi:Hey rainee, if this is so, care to explain why are there pro-life groups and anti-life groups? Not trying to be difficult here. Just that this sentence don't make sense. I think majority of us would have agreed that a foetus is a life, and God knows if she has more than one. By aborting, you may be killing more than one. Just consider. -
I still think that the parents should not be kept in the dark about this kinda thing. It is a big matter, concerning a matter of life and death.Originally posted by ndmmxiaomayi:Actually any adult they trust will do.