am i doomed to be alone?
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Maybe it's your approach? Maybe he felt as though you were harassing him or something?Originally posted by Baoliandeng:why does he wants to brush me off?
My answer would be to just forget about this guy. If he says that he doesn't want you, then so be it: he doesn't want you. You have to respect his decision and move on.
I'm 23 years old, by the way. I've been rejected by a total of three girls so far. Each time it happened, I decided to respect their decision and move on. It was like a punch in the gut when they rejected me, and it was an even harder punch when they all got attached to other guys later. But I've learnt to accept their decisions and carry on with my life. If they can carry on with their lives, then so can I.
Also, as you said, he values sex more than relationships. In other words, even if you do get into a relationship with this guy, he's more likely to use you for his own entertainment, namely, sex. He sees women as nothing more than objects for his own pleasure.
Why do you still want to be with such a jerk, anyway? He is a disgrace to us guys and a bane to you women. I say forget about the jerk and find another guy who'll treat you better. -
Sometimes you need to take a step back and look at how the painting is unfolding before you with him in it.
Why keep someone who's not brightening up your painting as the main subject?
Consider chunking this painting and start a new one afresh. -
i cant get over with the feelings of being rejected not him..i guessOriginally posted by macjoe:Sometimes you need to take a step back and look at how the painting is unfolding before you with him in it.
Why keep someone who's not brightening up your painting as the main subject?
Consider chunking this painting and start a new one afresh. -
You were rejected by a jerk who sees women as toys for his own pleasure.Originally posted by Baoliandeng:i cant get over with the feelings of being rejected not him..i guess
So it's not a loss at all to you. -
My point of view:
Don't give up a forest of trees just because of 1 rotten tree.
Well, it's not easy to find your true love as many of us has many failures and barriers before we can attain our long lasting love.
Most importantly, don't find a guy just because you need companionship.
Ask yourself what kind of guy attracts you.
Open your circle of friends, sure you can find yourself a suitable partner.
I believe looks is not that important as some guys really go for characters as well individual personality, so be confident and don't lose hope.
Lastly, dont feel so bad or disappointed when someone reject your affection, never say die as it's your dream to find a right guy in your life, so persist your dream in the future.
Many of us actually still single and never have any gf/bfs before, just waiting for their chance. You are not alone! -
guess its best that u let things go and move on. jus to let u noe...u're nt e oni 1 having this kinda probs...for both gender, rejection is inevtiable at times, and yyes...e feeling wont b gd...and it may take a long time to get over it...but no choice. mayb those ard u are all attached, but rem...the world or country is bigger than your circle of frens...u r definitely nt alone..
tk this as another exp ba...tts how we humans grow, n in turn do better nxt time. -
*looks around frantically*
where's uncle devil?so many of such threads recently.duty calls for ur intervention liao.don't eat snake leh.
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Make urself look more attractive
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there are alot of people doomed to be alone too, you're not the only one.
maybe can find another doomed-to-be-alone-guy.
its fated. -
Originally posted by Baoliandeng:i have never been in a r/s. now 24 years old already.in the past, i had several crushes on a few guys and have been in love with a guy for the past 3 years.i confessed recently to my colleague but he simply rejected me crudely and brushed me aside.am i destined to be single? when i see that he is so upset over a failed r/s , i feel so bad.its as if im worthless ,so much inferior compared to his ex,or girls that he is interested in. We had several heart-to-heart conversations but ive failed to win his heart. its seem so impossible to him to be in a r/s with him .he even said something like yes to sex but absolutely no to love.am i so worthless and unlovable in his eyes? told a friend about that.he said something like u think he will like u meh with yr this kind of pattern.he makes it up as if im so awful.im losing my limited self-confidence..I had to ber rejected.i have little hopes of finding a guy who is willing to accept my love
no guys have ever expressed interest in me.i wonder is anything wrong with my looks.pls advise
I think the need to be loved has shot up to a point where you seemed to have become desperate and appeared likewise.
Guys may be guys, but the overpowering yearning-affection may turn them off.
As always, if you feel that you are inadequate, do what you must to restore this instability. If you desire enhancing looks, research and do what you must to allow that to happen. Never accept what you could change and resign yourself to fate.
P.S: Allow me to encourage you to continue the loving spirit and not get discourage. Love itself is a beauty, even if it was only one sided. With time and wisdom, you will understand what that doesn't work for you and things will get better from there. Only people who never try are people who will be doom to be alone.
Cheers -
I got 2 friends, now age 25/m and the other 24/m they 2 don't even have a gf before..
And as for me.. haiz! my looks is way above average, nearly reach the word Best looking. but its been 3 years i'm still single... i'm 23. i think its the 4th years in this year. i keep wondering why nobody wanna be with me!!
But if u have friends, u won't be lonely!!
And u must believe that your (tao hua) havent reach yet, once it reaches... it will not be 1, u will be busy going on dates. -
Quick hide it before kopi sees this.Originally posted by Yunhaier: I think the need to be loved has shot up to a point where you seemed to have become desperate and appeared likewise.
Guys may be guys, but the overpowering yearning-affection may turn them off.
As always, if you feel that you are inadequate, do what you must to restore this instability. If you desire enhancing looks, research and do what you must to allow that to happen. Never accept what you could change and resign yourself to fate.
P.S: Allow me to encourage you to continue the loving spirit and not get discourage. Love itself is a beauty, even if it was only one sided. With time and wisdom, you will understand what that doesn't work for you and things will get better from there. Only people who never try are people who will be doom to be alone.
Cheers
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i also hope to find guys who are doomed to be alone...
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hi, how can i help?Originally posted by Baoliandeng:i also hope to find guys who are doomed to be alone... -
Give him some credits lar... he is trying ok!Originally posted by M©+square:Quick hide it before kopi sees this.
And don't be a mean MC...
Cheers -
hi,
Although I don't really know the details, here are my comments. For the fact that he kinda said yes to sex, but no to love, it speaks alot about his personality.
I mean, he is just treating you like an object, and not as a real person that he can or will love.
You are not worthless, and I can say that no one is considered worthless. I know it is painful and hurting not being with the man you love. But sometimes I feel you should ask yourself. Is he worth it?
And not to worry, you are still young. You are 24 years old only...you still have years ahead before you need to settle down.
Never lose confidence in yourself. Cos if you wre to lose confidence in yourself, basically you are losing yourself. Stay as what you are and I hope that you can find the man you love who will accept you, regardless of what pattern. -
hahaOriginally posted by pwnz0r:Well, I suppose all hope if not lost if he's interested in sex with you. It would really be bad if he turns down the offer of sex.
I dun know what i'm going to say is of any help, anyway i'm myself in a miserable position too. But from what i observed, it's definitely much easier for gals to get attached than guys. Even the most plain looking jane in my project group has a BF... imagine i'm the only person amongst all my classmates to be single
Aft every project discussion, everyone wld be sprinting off to meet their partners, whilst i'll be thinkin what's on tv tonite... hopefully some nice shows
I have an old jc fren (male) who's a part-time model, tall and above-average lookin and he's been single for the past 3 yrs like me. So my conclusion is if gals are single, it's usually not abt looks... maybe u are too attractive that guys are afraid of expressing their interest in u. Or maybe u have the "I'm attached " look... there are countless possibilities
so pls dun lose confidence....
I feel like s-h-i-t too... but i'm tryin real hard (believe me, i know how hard its for an introvert person to be self confident!) to not let my self esteem plummet ... If at times u feel rely down & need someone to talk , can always pm me.. -
I'll let him update you.Originally posted by Yunhaier:Give him some credits lar... he is trying ok!
And don't be a mean MC...
Cheers -
For what...?Originally posted by Baoliandeng:i also hope to find guys who are doomed to be alone...
Nobody's really doomed to be alone... At least not as much as he / she confines himself / herself to be so.... -
Thanks for the information.Originally posted by sqully:*looks around frantically*
where's uncle devil?so many of such threads recently.duty calls for ur intervention liao.don't eat snake leh. -
i hope to find someone who can look beyond outer beauty.you mentioned plain janes who have bf..they have managed to find guys who dont mind looks..but go for personality i guess...
there are some guys who upon seeing the looks of a person will just feel she cant make it and refuse to know her better -
kopi's reputation not very good hor?Originally posted by M©+square:I'll let him update you. -
Whoa...I'm 28 and you don't see me pulling my hair out over my single status.
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Change your looks and dressing? .. I'm serious.. not as an insulting comment but the fact that most man thinks wiht their balls... so change your looks and dressing if you need to and do alittle read ups on art of seduction....
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I'm not sure how ya look, but so long as you're not a stunning beauty it all sounds fair enough to me...? You're not interested in one who's only interested in a beauty's looks but go for personality... And provided that you're one with personality (and no look?)... Guys who just go for looks won't come to you (as per your wish), but instead only guys interested truly interested in personality would like to know you better.... So I guess in the end things should just work out fair enough....? But of course, knowing one of such guys might take some time lah... No point rushing into it also.... But yup.. They EXIST...Originally posted by Baoliandeng:i hope to find someone who can look beyond outer beauty.you mentioned plain janes who have bf..they have managed to find guys who dont mind looks..but go for personality i guess...
there are some guys who upon seeing the looks of a person will just feel she cant make it and refuse to know her better