Bye Bye!!
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Yar i definitely do..i got record what she said on my phone without her knowing...but i think its abit psychotic le...he will think im the monster trying to get her..but she is the monster (in an irritatingly cute disguise) trying to get me...Originally posted by Isis:what is the horoscope of there " fren " ?
Be careful when u tackle there ger, somehow i sense she is not a simple person.
U also need to show some proof to your bf..
I just wanna be happy le..last time she shut up so i am happy and he is happy..just want to make him smile..
Oh yar she is not simple but not that difficult to read...u see..she is this kind of person right, for example, when u are put into a bare room with just white walls..u got nothing to say rite. No, she will talk about all the walls. Its like, die die must say something, even tho its stupid. and she thinks saying stupid things and giving that face is damn cute. Its like, every angle kanna cover by her. Kanna tekan, cry. No tekan, go and start her nonsense to someone else. Knowing everyone will side her. Now im thinking how do i approach her sia. -
Its just that all these things have turned me into a very bitter person...Im not like this...im usually damn happy one...but i became increasingly full of angst and very very troubled, which leads me to finally hate everyone and everything. which i need to crawl out of before i cross the line. I dont usually lose my temper very fast either..
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hmm...wad can i say...take care?
army guys like that one la...past by this period and you two will be strong than ever... -
Really? Hai..then i will bear it...he just told me he wun book out for one month...i damn sad...but in a way also abit happi maybe its a blessing..we need time apart also lar...all this up and down thing going on see each other also no pt..but dunno why the timing so si bei zhun...just had a fight, then he lost 11b, then now cannot book out for one month..i also dunno how to start conversation with sms now....Originally posted by R3SsH|n:hmm...wad can i say...take care?
army guys like that one la...past by this period and you two will be strong than ever...
lets hope he and i are really meant for each other man.. -
That one..i dunno le...him is taurus, me is leo...Originally posted by Isis:what is the horoscope of there " fren " ?
Be careful when u tackle there ger, somehow i sense she is not a simple person.
U also need to show some proof to your bf.. -
*sigh* Its very hard isn't it? People expect you to change, and ironically they can't wait very long for that to happen. Change isn't just snapshots of you in your messed up state, some background music, bits of you trying hard and disciplining yourself, and in the next few minutes, film you completely changed. Just like a movie. Real change takes time.
My bf nags me alot but not moderately. I am not sure if I'm being a fool, but hell, who isnt when it comes to love and trust and all that sht. Just my luck to believe in love so much I'd freaking do absolutely anything to make the man smile. Yes, I am sort of freaking ugly. That girl tells me all the time until I really look damn ugly now. Funny nose, funny eyes, funny smile, fat fingers, tummy..bleah. She makes it all seem like sucha crime. What the hell is wrong with girls nowadays man. I mean girls like her, those act cute types. Don't they realize how freaking fake it is, and how annoying it is, and how NOT infectous and NOT cute are their usually dumb statements.
I mean, she even THINKS that my bf has ridden an ostrich and a rhino. Ostrich, i don't blame her for believing because its possible. A Rhino?? Damn. She gotta be really dumb. Either that or she knows that its impossible but thinks its cute to be dumb. That is a true blue idiot.
And to think I tried to fit in and now I really am stupid. Gotta read more. -
anna,
I'm disturbed by your reaction onto her.
You seemed to be placing your concerns on the wrong spot.
Of cos, i know it's bothering you just as much.
So far what's the outcome with your boyfriend about this? -
Why are u disturbed? And what wrong spot? Let me know...Im abit messed up right now...Originally posted by M©+square:anna,
I'm disturbed by your reaction onto her.
You seemed to be placing your concerns on the wrong spot.
Of cos, i know it's bothering you just as much.
So far what's the outcome with your boyfriend about this?
Oh well, in short, he doesn't give a flying fck and thinks im just being petty. -
Get out of the relationship if you can't handle it... It can be really unhealthy for you...Originally posted by AshedAnna: He doesn' see the pt of standing up for me because in the first place he is able to heck care abt what she says according to him, but what about me? I can't not care...especially when it gets so personal...arrghh...i never do anything to hurt him..why he still like that...why why why why why why why why why why...i told him before no matter how angry or how sad or whatever he is he is still beautiful to me....just give me some time to cry ahwile will do because there is nothing else I can do but cry. everything else is most likely forbidden or will get me even more upset. Like if i choose to talk about it, nothing gd will come out of it because he will get silent, i will get more frustrated... -
No offence, but I personally think you're the one who has trapped yourself in that corner today. You've got choice and you've got choices... But you just ain't thinking straight... You just reminds me of a devoted religious follower.. Believing too strongly in FAITH and drowning within your own thoughts...Originally posted by AshedAnna:Hai...
today he bad mood because he lost his 11b..this sunday his b-day but he cant book out for a month i think its drivers course...why timing so bad one..
I gave things alot of thought actualli...I won't leave him but I think I will have to tell that girl off...(jialat she got the same name as me some more). If she tekan me again, I will just tell her firmly but tactfully that she should basically just shut the f up. No choice...gotta do it...im just scared that pple will think im oversensitive or wat..but i think now not scared liao...
I dunno when i will meet her next but if i do...then i do lo.. if i make her cry..then lan lan if everybody side her i just apologise...because i really kanna cornered until cannot corner anymore...what u think? what is the best way to say to her?
Understand that love is not just about keeping someone... Sometimes it's also about the courage to let go.... Pls learn to protect yourself and walk out of it bravely while you still can today....
From the way you've described yourself, it's just difficult to let go of a gf who is all that sacrificing... And keeping you also means that he has nothing to lose at all....
Hereby hope to remind you... STRONG LOVE and FAITH only works if you're practising the RIGHT 'religion'... If you're in a WRONG one, you're just condemning yourself....
Anything just give me a call or sms me....? -
Okie...thank u...Originally posted by Devil1976:Get out of the relationship if you can't handle it... It can be really unhealthy for you... anyhow he wont book out for a month..maybe its gd also la..some time apart will probably allow us to think individually abt what we want...
Ok...I will admit...I wanted the engagement as a false security blanket too..partially. I know its very bad of me, but it was sort of an assurance. Im scared. I dunno how to let go, or let go properly. Im freaking idiotic about this sort of thing one. -
My main concern now is that rather you let go now while you still can barely handle it than to freak out when something really happened and you let go without being able to handle it in any sense at all... I would imagine the latter scenerio to be much more dangerous and harmful for yourself... If you think you can't handle a break up now, can you imagine what would happen by then? And an extra word of caution.. You should know your own situation much better than I do... Sometimes painful as it may be, it's just meaningless to strive away from the inevitable..Originally posted by AshedAnna:Okie...thank u... anyhow he wont book out for a month..maybe its gd also la..some time apart will probably allow us to think individually abt what we want...
Ok...I will admit...I wanted the engagement as a false security blanket too..partially. I know its very bad of me, but it was sort of an assurance. Im scared. I dunno how to let go, or let go properly. Im freaking idiotic about this sort of thing one.
Like you've said, you were once a VERY HAPPY GIRL... I've seen many 'used to be happy' people before... They're now constantly trying to find back their own self but to vain... Don't wander too far off to the point of no return...
Whatever 'bad' that had been said about your bf have mainly came through your own mouth (posts)... Though on the other hand you've always been reassuring yourself.. Saying that it's ok... Just see how things go.. etc. It's really not that ok because no progress is really being made... Current situation would only easily suffocates you as time goes by, and it's quite unlikely that you're gonna be getting any 'assistance' to change your situation unless you've decided to change it yourself...
You can't totally free yourself from the current 'trap' unless you're detached from your bf... And like you've said, you USED to be SO HAPPY together... Why the changes now...? Now that he's behaving differently... And he no longer see you as the person you used to be... It's just like 2 total strangers trying to live behind the fairy tale of 2 people from the past.... FAITH ALONE is ONLY get you THIS FAR. If nothing else is pushing the situation on for the BETTER, FAITH can only push you a little further up before you bump yourself into the WALLS.
As much as I hate to mention this, but may I remind you of KIM? How she's being treated and how else now has changed? From the point of an outsider, EVEN YOU can EASILY SEE.... SERIOUSLY, my MAIN CONCERN is that you might end up the foot steps of her... SOMETIMES some things just happen TOO FAST and BEFORE you know it, ALL would be DRIVING you ALMOST INSTANTLY without much room for proper considerations and thoughts... GIVE yourself more 'SPACE' and CUSHION from matters...
Take a step back and learn to humbly let go of something then EVERYTHING... To LOST MORE of YOURSELF when it's too late...
MAY YOUR FATHER BE WITH YOU..... -
Originally posted by AshedAnna:That one..i dunno le...him is taurus, me is leo...
I do sympathize with your case; somewhat a mixture of helpless abandonment, addiction and extreme despondent in your sadistic relationship. There are two distinctive power struggles: between a girlfriend and a gal friend AND that of a boyfriend and his friends. This heavy power struggle has robbed you (the Lioness) of your divine authority that is bestowed onto you - the position of a girlfriend in a status and rights.
When a Leo is denied of his/her rights, the Lion/Lioness becomes aggressive and vindictive. But chances are (especially when Mars is not strong), the big cat's howl is worst than its bite. You may look terrifying, but beneath that exterior is a wounded cat.
This wound represents your ego and you have also lost much of your previous radiance because you can't seemed to receive the kind and form of affection you deeply craved. You don't make tremendous demands and that all you need is for him to gently stroke your mane and cuddle into your embrace.
The big cat needs to feel love and affection from his partner, before he/she could give a wide smile, reciprocate the same euphoric affection and become a happy lion once again.
*** Have you ever thought of the fact that your bf's ex-gf could have actually hated her like the way you did? Have you thought of the fact that her presence may have contributed some percentage of a reason why their relationship has ended? This girl is definitely unconscious to her style of relating to one category of people - namely your bf's gf: you. It doesn't matter who is in YOUR position, for she would have replicate the exact attitude and pissed the hell out of anyone being that position - your bf's gf: you.
Your emotional suppression is unhealthy. Being obstinate and fixedly in your pathetic situation will only brought forth further grudges, discontentment and suffering.
You seriously need to communicate: he probably has to listen/know all these replies you have posted up here because ONLY he can exercise decision that would make you breathe easier. He, likely under influence from his friends (inclusive of her), may create a distorted picture of what you are feeling or going through in his perception. If you don't speak and allow yourself to be heard, you will always be the 'over-sensitive' girlfriend.
And obviously, to allow your words to go into his head and remain in there, you cannot be yelling, appeared-to-be-wild-trashing-about-things and all sort of thingy that would symbolize a crazy girlfriend overwhelmed by emotions. It has to be a discussion... a serious talk that may roll tears, but the content has to be there and NOT another 'compromised' communication.
Understand this:
You may not have a choice to choose his friends, but you certainly have your own rights to dislike her and avoid hanging out altogether. Likewise, your boyfriend may not have a choice to manipulate your liking/hate for her, but certainly, he could have some understanding and AVOID having situations caught up between the two of you, like putting two fighting spiders in a match box. To avoid such situations:
I) You don't have to be there when her presence is there.
II) You don't have to ask your boyfriend to make choices: between you or them (best friend and best friend's gf). Just let him know that you can't connect to her world and it is making you depress. So the solution is to live in separate worlds.
III) Then ask your boyfriend to allocate time separately - their world and yours.
Remember, I think you would rather have 2 hours of quality time spent with him, than one day of group outing with him and someone you abhorred.
You will probably spent less time with him; make use of this time to think about what you really want in your relationship and what you would like him to understand, know, accept and do. Should you end your relationship, make that ending based on a substantial reason and not out of emotional explosion.
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
] I do sympathize with your case; somewhat a mixture of helpless abandonment, addiction and extreme despondent in your sadistic relationship. There are two distinctive power struggles: between a girlfriend and a gal friend AND that of a boyfriend and his friends. This heavy power struggle has robbed you (the Lioness) of your divine authority that is bestowed onto you - the position of a girlfriend in a status and rights.
When a Leo is denied of his/her rights, the Lion/Lioness becomes aggressive and vindictive. But chances are (especially when Mars is not strong), the big cat's howl is worst than its bite. You may look terrifying, but beneath that exterior is a wounded cat.
This wound represents your ego and you have also lost much of your previous radiance because you can't seemed to receive the kind and form of affection you deeply craved. You don't make tremendous demands and that all you need is for him to gently stroke your mane and cuddle into your embrace.
The big cat needs to feel love and affection from his partner, before he/she could give a wide smile, reciprocate the same euphoric affection and become a happy lion once again.
*** Have you ever thought of the fact that your bf's ex-gf could have actually hated her like the way you did? Have you thought of the fact that her presence may have contributed some percentage of a reason why their relationship has ended? This girl is definitely unconscious to her style of relating to one category of people - namely your bf's gf: you. It doesn't matter who is in YOUR position, for she would have replicate the exact attitude and pissed the hell out of anyone being that position - your bf's gf: you.
Your emotional suppression is unhealthy. Being obstinate and fixedly in your pathetic situation will only brought forth further grudges, discontentment and suffering.
You seriously need to communicate: he probably has to listen/know all these replies you have posted up here because ONLY he can exercise decision that would make you breathe easier. He, likely under influence from his friends (inclusive of her), may create a distorted picture of what you are feeling or going through in his perception. If you don't speak and allow yourself to be heard, you will always be the 'over-sensitive' girlfriend.
And obviously, to allow your words to go into his head and remain in there, you cannot be yelling, appeared-to-be-wild-trashing-about-things and all sort of thingy that would symbolize a crazy girlfriend overwhelmed by emotions. It has to be a discussion... a serious talk that may roll tears, but the content has to be there and [b]NOT another 'compromised' communication.
Understand this:
You may not have a choice to choose his friends, but you certainly have your own rights to dislike her and avoid hanging out altogether. Likewise, your boyfriend may not have a choice to manipulate your liking/hate for her, but certainly, he could have some understanding and AVOID having situations caught up between the two of you, like putting two fighting spiders in a match box. To avoid such situations:
I) You don't have to be there when her presence is there.
II) You don't have to ask your boyfriend to make choices: between you or them (best friend and best friend's gf). Just let him know that you can't connect to her world and it is making you depress. So the solution is to live in separate worlds.
III) Then ask your boyfriend to allocate time separately - their world and yours.
Remember, I think you would rather have 2 hours of quality time spent with him, than one day of group outing with him and someone you abhorred.
You will probably spent less time with him; make use of this time to think about what you really want in your relationship and what you would like him to understand, know, accept and do. Should you end your relationship, make that ending based on a substantial reason and not out of emotional explosion.
Cheers [/b]
That's it...the whole horoscope thing..its exactly it...I didn't use to be like this...I was so happy and carefree and ready to embrace everything..life..love..all that...now I've just become so jealous, so bitter, so overly suspicious..so freaking low about myself...and it just infects my bf until he's desperate for me to smile to the pt where he makes me whether I like it or not..im just scared that he and the girl will get closer if Im not there.That she will touch him and cross the line. How do I overcome this?
I am sucha idiot when it comes to relationships...I mean its not a game where u deliberately draw back and hope the guy pines for you...im not that type of girl..but somehow..sad to say..that strategy works. -
Originally posted by Devil1976:My main concern now is that rather you let go now while you still can barely handle it than to freak out when something really happened and you let go without being able to handle it in any sense at all... I would imagine the latter scenerio to be much more dangerous and harmful for yourself... If you think you can't handle a break up now, can you imagine what would happen by then? And an extra word of caution.. You should know your own situation much better than I do... Sometimes painful as it may be, it's just meaningless to strive away from the inevitable..
Like you've said, you were once a VERY HAPPY GIRL... I've seen many 'used to be happy' people before... They're now constantly trying to find back their own self but to vain... Don't wander too far off to the point of no return...
Whatever 'bad' that had been said about your bf have mainly came through your own mouth (posts)... Though on the other hand you've always been reassuring yourself.. Saying that it's ok... Just see how things go.. etc. It's really not that ok because no progress is really being made... Current situation would only easily suffocates you as time goes by, and it's quite unlikely that you're gonna be getting any 'assistance' to change your situation unless you've decided to change it yourself...
You can't totally free yourself from the current 'trap' unless you're detached from your bf... And like you've said, you USED to be SO HAPPY together... Why the changes now...? Now that he's behaving differently... And he no longer see you as the person you used to be... It's just like 2 total strangers trying to live behind the fairy tale of 2 people from the past.... FAITH ALONE is ONLY get you THIS FAR. If nothing else is pushing the situation on for the BETTER, FAITH can only push you a little further up before you bump yourself into the WALLS.
As much as I hate to mention this, but may I remind you of KIM? How she's being treated and how else now has changed? From the point of an outsider, EVEN YOU can EASILY SEE.... SERIOUSLY, my MAIN CONCERN is that you might end up the foot steps of her... SOMETIMES some things just happen TOO FAST and BEFORE you know it, ALL would be DRIVING you ALMOST INSTANTLY without much room for proper considerations and thoughts... GIVE yourself more 'SPACE' and CUSHION from matters...
Take a step back and learn to humbly let go of something then EVERYTHING... To LOST MORE of YOURSELF when it's too late...
MAY YOUR FATHER BE WITH YOU..... You have no idea how much I miss my dad and how badly I want to be just like him..its so hard. -
Its come to a point where everything becomes my fault. And I've realized my bf and that girl have striking similiarities. They DO like the same songs, they DO like to eat their vegetables the same way, they DO drive almost the same, the DO nag at their respective partners, they DO know how to control their expenditure, they are both smart one way or another. Although I think shes just a dumb sht. Its come to a point where I cant sleep at night unless he sms-es me, or something. If he doesnt, my imagination runs wild because she may be messaging him or sending him more ringtones or something like that. Its horrible.
Her bf and i are strikingly similar too. We're nothing stated above. In fact I think we both suck. I had a talk with him. He can't do nothing to her because he feels he isn't in a position to because he cheated on her before...and he feels guilty about it. she doesnt know. All these complexities and this entire situation wouldn't ever happen if I knew how to bear all the burden. The thing is, I can't unless I rid myself of feelings forever. Nobody can. Even if they suck it up and bear it, they will explode. Just like me. Look at me. I keep cutting myself, I feel ugly...its wrong but inevitable. Here's my picture. Please tell me I'm not ugly. Or something. -
girl in red most chio! girl in blue looks thrashy, bitchy, possesive & all that -
btw.....which gal is Anna???Originally posted by AshedAnna:Its come to a point where everything becomes my fault. And I've realized my bf and that girl have striking similiarities. They DO like the same songs, they DO like to eat their vegetables the same way, they DO drive almost the same, the DO nag at their respective partners, they DO know how to control their expenditure, they are both smart one way or another. Although I think shes just a dumb sht. Its come to a point where I cant sleep at night unless he sms-es me, or something. If he doesnt, my imagination runs wild because she may be messaging him or sending him more ringtones or something like that. Its horrible.
Her bf and i are strikingly similar too. We're nothing stated above. In fact I think we both suck. I had a talk with him. He can't do nothing to her because he feels he isn't in a position to because he cheated on her before...and he feels guilty about it. she doesnt know. All these complexities and this entire situation wouldn't ever happen if I knew how to bear all the burden. The thing is, I can't unless I rid myself of feelings forever. Nobody can. Even if they suck it up and bear it, they will explode. Just like me. Look at me. I keep cutting myself, I feel ugly...its wrong but inevitable. Here's my picture. Please tell me I'm not ugly. Or something.
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the one in redOriginally posted by pinkygal76:btw.....which gal is Anna???
i think
if im wrong, im in deep trouble -
Why did you assume the one in blue is that girl?Originally posted by alexkusu:the one in red
i think
if im wrong, im in deep trouble -
*slap forehead*
Could you please think before you type, or at least let her reply which one is her first.
By the way, who's tat guy in red Jay Chow wannabe? I see his face I don't like liao.
Originally posted by alexkusu:girl in red most chio! girl in blue looks thrashy, bitchy, possesive & all that -
cos ah.. based on threadstarter's posts.. she seems to be the submissive, gentle and caring type. in my own opinion ah, red shirt one represents threadstarter the most.Originally posted by M©+square:Why did you assume the one in blue is that girl? -
erm.. u shud listen ur own advice horOriginally posted by Boo777:*slap forehead*
Could you please think before you type, or at least let her reply which one is her first.
By the way, who's tat guy in red Jay Chow wannabe? I see his face I don't like liao.
that cud be her bf