My painful Traumatic...What did girls actually want?
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Sherejected me in a NOT SO TACTICFUL MANNEROriginally posted by browniebaobao:
simi heartbreak?
u should know the girl better before you decide whether to go on a r/s with her.
and if u know what her expectations are, then you should be prepared for it lor.
one thing i muz tell u guys..
guys who have this kinda thoughts turn girls away.
personally i feel very irritated if the guy always come tell me sg girls are materialistic and he stand no chance watsoever.
then i will say 'hey im also a sg girl! so what do u say?"
SO CRUDE
Goodluck to finding rich hubbies -
$$$$...
but i still believe a good heart counts more...
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u leh?Originally posted by SGpork:lol..
bbb dont waste time with him la..
gt anything to tell me? -
oops....Originally posted by browniebaobao:u leh?
gt anything to tell me? -
perhaps she was only crude to u and u deserved it?Originally posted by 0lala:Sherejected me in a NOT SO TACTICFUL MANNER
SO CRUDE
Goodluck to finding rich hubbies -
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another user..
with spolit keyboard -
Then you should go out with me.Originally posted by xShevchenkox:l used to think if l put in effort and try my best in doing things...it will be okie..
but sad to say...the world we are living now...is not
There are many ugly realities and facts that u hav to face it... u hav
the among factors that l say earlier...u have the upperhand..
The realities you see doesn't end there. -
what do u mean ne? mc..a bit dun get it
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Which means the things you see, are because of things you chose to see.Originally posted by xShevchenkox:what do u mean ne? mc..a bit dun get it
I can lead you to see the other perspective if you want to go for a sight-seeing session. -
Yes, no doubt there are gals out there who dun go for guys without money, looks etc.Originally posted by browniebaobao:i duno y sg guys are so pessismistic.
a close fren ever told me he got no money, no career.. dun dare to find gf..
then i told him.. money, status, car, watever.. they all mean nothing to me.
i duno told how many guys le.. not every girl is that realistic.
but, they still chose to believe that girls dun go for guys without money, looks etc.
so what can i say?
i say u dun believe..
But most do. And we guys have been hurt over and over again believing otherwise. Thus we are on the defensive now.
Also, most guys go for good looks. (can't really blame them) Pretty gals WILL often go for money and looks in guys won't u say? All the rich and handsome guys hitting on them and pampering them all the time. (i do not deny there are pretty gals who do not look for looks/money though)
From personal experience and friends' experience, i find it very hard to trust a pretty gal. Too easy for guys to get emotionally attached to them too and get used/toyed.
I'll simply go for gals I find mildy attractive and look for inner beauty now. Which is also very hard unfortunately.... -
Originally posted by clementius:Yes, no doubt there are gals out there who dun go for guys without money, looks etc.
But most do. And we guys have been hurt over and over again believing otherwise. Thus we are on the defensive now.
Also, most guys go for good looks. (can't really blame them) Pretty gals WILL often go for money and looks in guys won't u say? All the rich and handsome guys hitting on them and pampering them all the time. (i do not deny there are pretty gals who do not look for looks/money though)
From personal experience and friends' experience, i find it very hard to trust a pretty gal. Too easy for guys to get emotionally attached to them too and get used/toyed.
I'll simply go for gals I find mildy attractive and look for inner beauty now. Which is also very hard unfortunately....
i agree that most pretty girls are not simple.
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Anyway, the grass is always greener on the other side
If you guys think that foreign girls are less demanding, by all means go for them. There is no need to annouce and tell us why foreign girls are better. It's kinda funny because it sounds like you are trying to convince yourself they are better
I believe in whichever country they are from, the local guys will be complaining that their girls are materialistic and too demanding and cannot accept the simple life they have there Kinda ironical isn't it? -
Wah... So many posts.... I read it another day.
Just a simple note to all those who have questions on things relating to gals (SG or others): Be patient, be kind, try NOT to be self-seeking (though this one is hard) and never fail to give up. -
Allow me to give an objective point of view.
We live in a economic society where every cent counts. Every time the prices of goods and services increase, we tend to complain and hope that our income will increase to compensate for the increase. Sg girls who go after money have a point there. That's why it's such a turn on for them when they see guys with money. The ability to earn a lot of money is an attractive trait to them. Women usually respect guys who can earn more than them as they marry up.
However, as many as girls who go after guys with money, there are also women who don't go after money. But this doesn't mean the r/s will still last. Sometimes the r/s dun last because (a) the guy do something which turns off the girl and makes her lose feelings for the guy or (b) the guy has lost feelings for the girl and again the r/s becomes bad again.
Guys, before you go into dating a girl, make sure she likes you for you, not for your possessions. Don't get too emotionally involved yet. Make sure you know who you are dealing with. Ask yourself: why is she with me? Does she like me because I am loaded? If she doesn't like you, dump her. The rule is, never love someone who doesn't love you back. Simple, isn't it? -
shev guy,Originally posted by xShevchenkox:When u treated her too well and too sincere, she dun appreciate it at all de
l still hav the shadows of my last r/s...l remember l was kept being scold and scold for no reason by my ex....even if l had try my best in putting things rite...l am still scold..the words that she used to scold me....the scolding of me continuosly had occasionally appeared in my mind and l feel tired and want cry out at times when l think of it...y must l be scold when l have done nthing wrong ? Imagine...sumone scolding you...and u hav to keep quiet and apologise...how is that feeling? Now l think back...it is like humiliation and l feel that my integrity and morality had been trampled... l will never be able to brush it away...not that l am petty...l oso dun noe how to put it.. My last r/s experience is too painful...sumhow l reali hope this had not started in the 1st place, although it has been the past....l am not sad anymore...but the scar of this incident still is in me...From this incident..l learn sumtinz too...
R/s is sumtinz that reali nver last...the 1st 3 months maybe honeymoon period, after that into quarrels and conflicts and then into breakup...kinda sad.. dont understand what they want oso
Maybe in a r/s, l think it is better not to get engrossly into it...it might not hurt so much after all when u put in minimal efforts...
Some Girls, l dun meant all... cant be satisfied no matter how hard u try..
do you like being put down all the time? sometimes it's better to be single. You feel happier without someone nagging and scolding you.
The point is r/s can last if you can find the right girl and do the right things. However only small percentage of couples are truly happy with their marriages and/or relationships.
The guy has to give in sometimes and learn to say 'NO' sometimes. Everytime you see someone like your ex-gf giving you crap. You gotta be tough, guy. You gotta be tough. Every time you allow a girl to treat you with disrespect, she has already more or less lost feelings for you and the r/s is about to break up soon. Either that, it's her personality problem which is also someone you don't want to be with either.
How old is your ex-gf? Usually girls who are young don't really know what they want and are less giving. In other words, immature in r/s issues. -
LOL... Please don stereotype all sg gal just becos of one of yr bad incident! I sometimes laugh at some sg guy who went pub and disco in search of gf and lifetime partner cos their social circle is small and little chance of contacting opposite sex. They expect to find good gal in that place? Yes...if might be but chances are very LOW!!! If u get to know a ger from pub who is a ah lian,demanding and unresonable. Don't blame all sg gal are bad and why yr r/s turns that!Originally posted by xShevchenkox:When u treated her too well and too sincere, she dun appreciate it at all de
l still hav the shadows of my last r/s...l remember l was kept being scold and scold for no reason by my ex....even if l had try my best in putting things rite...l am still scold..the words that she used to scold me....the scolding of me continuosly had occasionally appeared in my mind and l feel tired and want cry out at times when l think of it...y must l be scold when l have done nthing wrong ? Imagine...sumone scolding you...and u hav to keep quiet and apologise...how is that feeling? Now l think back...it is like humiliation and l feel that my integrity and morality had been trampled... l will never be able to brush it away...not that l am petty...l oso dun noe how to put it.. My last r/s experience is too painful...sumhow l reali hope this had not started in the 1st place, although it has been the past....l am not sad anymore...but the scar of this incident still is in me...From this incident..l learn sumtinz too...
R/s is sumtinz that reali nver last...the 1st 3 months maybe honeymoon period, after that into quarrels and conflicts and then into breakup...kinda sad.. dont understand what they want oso
Maybe in a r/s, l think it is better not to get engrossly into it...it might not hurt so much after all when u put in minimal efforts...
Some Girls, l dun meant all... cant be satisfied no matter how hard u try..
As for the thread starter,why in the first place u like a gal like that? Scold u for no reason??? Don't tell me in the first 3 months,she totally never show any sign of immaturity,unreasonableness and she is yr perfect angel who gives in everything to you. Plus a very kind-hearted gal. Suddenly after 3months ,she can just make a 180 degree turn and change into a devil?
What u like her and make her court her in the first place? Is it just becos she is one of the pretty gal with a hot body? I personally believe what u get is what u sow. She may find her damm pretty and totally forget abt looking carefully abt her character before making the first move on her! This is also one of the fatal mistakes of many sg guy! Who court a gal purely on her look first( cos maybe they can show off her to friends or can be a pure pleasure on bed)
I believe if you understand enough before making a move on her as yr ger. You will save yr self a lot of painful memory. Btw,if i ever encounter such unreasonable ger in the first place,I will have break with her within a week. Yr failure to have a rationale and sounded minded makes u totally blinded in this r/s until you reach the stage of cannot withstand it before break off is also a part of yr fault in this painful r/s. Don put the blame entirely on the other side. Do some soul searching and improve on yr next r/s. Open y r Big Big eyes before u plunge in the love river again! -
cheer welcome to the reality
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Originally posted by xShevchenkox:When u treated her too well and too sincere, she dun appreciate it at all de
l still hav the shadows of my last r/s...l remember l was kept being scold and scold for no reason by my ex....even if l had try my best in putting things rite...l am still scold..the words that she used to scold me....the scolding of me continuosly had occasionally appeared in my mind and l feel tired and want cry out at times when l think of it...y must l be scold when l have done nthing wrong ? Imagine...sumone scolding you...and u hav to keep quiet and apologise...how is that feeling? Now l think back...it is like humiliation and l feel that my integrity and morality had been trampled... l will never be able to brush it away...not that l am petty...l oso dun noe how to put it.. My last r/s experience is too painful...sumhow l reali hope this had not started in the 1st place, although it has been the past....l am not sad anymore...but the scar of this incident still is in me...From this incident..l learn sumtinz too...
R/s is sumtinz that reali nver last...the 1st 3 months maybe honeymoon period, after that into quarrels and conflicts and then into breakup...kinda sad.. dont understand what they want oso
Maybe in a r/s, l think it is better not to get engrossly into it...it might not hurt so much after all when u put in minimal efforts...
Some Girls, l dun meant all... cant be satisfied no matter how hard u try..
We are all stars, born without a name. Our potential is limitless.
Then we are brought up in human environment and are subjected to our harsh surrounding. We are affected by our immediate families, ethnic background, social/moral codes, religion, etc.
Then we shape a story we constantly repeat to ourselves.
This reiterated habit becomes part of our mindset, which unfolds our destiny.
And when we implement a mindset like Olala, our conviction becomes a truth; a distorted truth in which we follow and assume truth in distortion.
We continued to be led... in this unenlightened state, pointing fingers at others when the root of problem lies with ourselves. It's not hard to imagine how Love would have turn out eventually, because our core beliefs are filled with so much biased, negative perceptions that it impede our growth in love.
Is our pain inflicted by our partners? Or are we too verdant to understand our choices and our Love, which causes our agony?
We all fall badly somewhere in this cosmic journey of love, but how we handle this injury will reflect what's going to happen in the future. You are free to equip yourself with the mindset presented by Olala, I will not refute that opinion because everyone is entitled to theirs.
But pray tell me how is that going to assist you to a better person or even, to seek for a better relationship? Simply by hiding in an ivory tower and be cynical because you are now protective of your ego and reject powerful lessons that could built you?
This is the mindset you are going to adopt for yourself, which in turn, will have great influence on the kind of partner you will attract and how it will turn out to be. It is so much easier to go with the flow, reckon how Love is ephemeral, than having to walk against the current and surmount it.
This is your inaugural relationship and you have just barely started.
And if you can't even surpass this by accepting it as a larger picture to your eventual journey in love, you will perish before you achieve anything in love.
P.S: Arrogance and conceited ego has no place in Love. Those that adopted it will witness how love would attempt to reshape their defiant spirit and introduce chaos to annihilate wrecked mindset.
You have much to explore and learn. Keep in touch with your soul and discern how things could be better in the future.
Mature.
Cheers -
thanks for everyone comments especially mc yunaheir and the others....thanks all...
Ur posts let me understand there might be ray of hopes...and l do feel better -
CheersOriginally posted by xShevchenkox:thanks for everyone comments especially mc yunaheir and the others....thanks all...
Ur posts let me understand there might be ray of hopes...and l do feel better -
Sounds like you were in an abusive relationship. Cut the strings, man. She obviously wanted control over you and your life, and she took whatever opportunity she could get to berate you.
Good luck. -
I used to like this girl for close to 4-5 years. I treat her very well, but i know in my heart she was just using me. Everytime she got problems, she come and find me, then after making her happy, she just walk away from me, and go into the arms of other guys.
Finally, I decided to slip out of her life. That was when she discovered that the way she used to treat me was wrong, and try to get me back into her life, by saying how she cannot do without me, how she like me etc. I just tell her that perhaps its time to move on.
Sometimes, u need 2 leave, before a girl discover just who is the most important person in her life. -
Make sure u hold the reins next time and not get abuseOriginally posted by xShevchenkox:thanks for everyone comments especially mc yunaheir and the others....thanks all...
Ur posts let me understand there might be ray of hopes...and l do feel better -
Actually,I feel that some of the girls out there really do not know what they want. Don't mean to be sexist but, in this day and age where they are better educated, they demand equality and men to be their slaves etc...but no...the only way they are getting it is due to the farked-up women's charter...totally not beneficial to men at all.