My heart is dead.
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hi, i just want to ask u somethingOriginally posted by Quinsy:Actually, I won't know how much he truly loves me. I can only trust his word, right?
And you're right. The only thing that is stopping me now is his claim of loving me very much.
ask yourself do you love him? Remove all the noise, about him loving you, you always in hiding, your parents don't like him, financial future, etc.
After that ask yourself, if you love him, what is it that causes you to want to break off from him? Is it becoz he does not wish to improve himself?
If that's the case, then tell him honestly why you wish to break off with him, you can give him 6 months (time up to you) to prove himself, if he doesn't learn how to improve, then ask him to ship out. Love is not just words. Love is action. If he knows that to be with you, he must be stronger, he will work hard and show it to you. If he doesn't, its all humbug.
Of coz, if you do not love him, then break immediately. -
Note
I am a believer of both love and bread
I think both must exist. One cannot exist without the other. Any idiot who comes to you and ask you a question, that you must choose one, is an idealist, whom usually can't survive as well.
At the most, there is a precedence. Like Love precedes Bread for me. And that's why, when I love my wife, and want to give her the best of everything, getting more Bread becomes 2nd nature to me. I will work harder to give her a better life.
That's why I firmly believe that both can be intertwined. -
Precisely...I mean frankly ok. To all ladies out there whom say that I don't mind feeding a xiaobai or that you are a professional. Imagine this too, when you got important functions to attend, you bring him along. The guys there are talking about economics, the development in the market, technological advances and what will he be talkin about? He will be so damned lost! If he opens his mouth, he will embarrass you, if he doesn't people will think you issued a gag order or he's being arrogant.Originally posted by soul_rage:Note
I am a believer of both love and bread
I think both must exist. One cannot exist without the other. Any idiot who comes to you and ask you a question, that you must choose one, is an idealist, whom usually can't survive as well.
At the most, there is a precedence. Like Love precedes Bread for me. And that's why, when I love my wife, and want to give her the best of everything, getting more Bread becomes 2nd nature to me. I will work harder to give her a better life.
That's why I firmly believe that both can be intertwined. -
No.Originally posted by Quinsy:I told my BF today that my heart is dead and I no longer loved his as much if I do love him at all. I told him of my intentions to date other guys with a higher level of education etc.
I made it clear that I wanted a break up. But he didn't want it.
we passed the day as usual and didn't mention about it until late at night when i was home.
He messaged me and said that he still loved me very much and wants to spend x mas with me and that no matter what he will always love me.
Should I still be with him?
I know I would feel pain if I really leave him. But as they say, duan tong bu ru chang tong.
But I can't bear to break his heart. I keep thinking of being with him for as long as he loves me. Even though I no longer love him. -
Huh? He smokes,drink ,splurge plus clubing? Ok la.. Not yr fault to leave him. Shall say earlier mah. At least we have a better assessment of him to pass judgement for yr decision ma..Originally posted by Quinsy:I've told him that if he truly loved me he would continue to upgrade himself and as it is, he is unable to pay for his own stuff. I've told him to save up, not splurge, take better care of himself and quit smoking. All that he gave excuses not to try to achieve. True, he cut down on smoking- but only when I'm with him. whenever he goes clubbing and starts drinking, he starts chain smoking again.
I expressed my desire to help him achieve things but he turned them down with excuses. I can't stand it. -
no $ no talk
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alright perhaps everyone of us has a different perspective of what love is. well at least to me, love is about both parties accomodating to each other. what's really happening now is, from what i've read so far, the guy is nothing but a PITA to TS. and the guy claimed tt he wants to be a cook, right? talents are inborn but its still all about hardwork and determination in the end. you may be a talent child but you will never be a great cook if you never try.
IMO i don't see a point in you trying to sustain this relationship anymore. go ahead and move on. currently all you can think of is probaly all the bad points against him. you're already drifting towards the biased side of things. if that's so, just be the bad guy and break things up. yes true that you might have had your honeymoon months way back but it isn't going to be honeymoon for the rest of your life. in poly i bet there's at least a bus full of guys that's of your type. don't hold back the forest just for a tree. don't let your heart rule over your head, remember this.
perhaps to make things easier, just ask your boyfriend to read this thread. perhaps he might be able to figure things out himself. -
If everyone can be so shuai3 kuai4 how nice.. do things w/o thinking or feeling.. forget things instantly.. haiz..
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woah...i think your bf is better off without you...Originally posted by Quinsy:My exes are still my friends. -
How many 'exes' do you have? Relationship and love are serious matters. Think long and hard before you commit yourself to a relationship. You dont change boyfriends like you do old clothes.Originally posted by Quinsy:My exes are still my friends. But the thing is, he refuses to let go. -
its common to see girls leaving guys.. sad.
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Drinks and smokes. Common wat. Who go clubbing dun drink and smoke???
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Well, for guys out there, come on. Join me, be free! See as many girls as you want. No commitments. You're not looking for a wife now right? Just someone to go out with and so on. So its fine! Nothing wrong there.Originally posted by ease:its common to see girls leaving guys.. sad. -
the basis of a relationship is that both must be happy...Originally posted by Quinsy:Actually, I won't know how much he truly loves me. I can only trust his word, right?
And you're right. The only thing that is stopping me now is his claim of loving me very much.
if he really love you very much he should let you go...
i always intend to let my gf go this time coz she always hurt me
sometimes i don't love her as much as i do the last time... -
I've only had ONE serious relationship before him. Sorry but I kinda categorised serious and childish relationships together. >.<Originally posted by Beyond Religion:How many 'exes' do you have? Relationship and love are serious matters. Think long and hard before you commit yourself to a relationship. You dont change boyfriends like you do old clothes. -
Gummy, me not guy. I can't go out with other guys and not be called a sl*t, biatch or whatever.Originally posted by SpecOps87:Well, for guys out there, come on. Join me, be free! See as many girls as you want. No commitments. You're not looking for a wife now right? Just someone to go out with and so on. So its fine! Nothing wrong there.
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Sg got a lot of people who don club,smoke and drink....plus they are around the 20s.... not old auntie and uncle!Originally posted by Manager433:Drinks and smokes. Common wat. Who go clubbing dun drink and smoke??? -
Actually Quinsy, I feel you already have the answer to yourself.
What you like to have and need now is probably support, am I right?
Then why not find a support network (besides this forum since you can only read but can't physically see and hear and talk to us) to help you tide through this period?
Speak to a close friend, or 2, about this. Get their support. It's very important to have this. That's what friends are for, isn't it? -
Give me the courage.Originally posted by Dating Specialist:Actually Quinsy, I feel you already have the answer to yourself.
What you like to have and need now is probably support, am I right?
Then why not find a support network (besides this forum since you can only read but can't physically see and hear and talk to us) to help you tide through this period?
Speak to a close friend, or 2, about this. Get their support. It's very important to have this. That's what friends are for, isn't it? -
I go clubbing but never smoke. Only Drink. Sometimes when I don't feel like it I don;t drink also. Just dance. WHY NOT?Originally posted by Manager433:Drinks and smokes. Common wat. Who go clubbing dun drink and smoke??? -
Gal, we can tell you all our opinion, but it is up to you to pick your own route and walk your own path.Originally posted by Quinsy:Give me the courage.
What we can do is, give you our blessings.
Follow your heart, i say.
Be strong gal. Good luck. -
Good on u man..Originally posted by Quinsy:I go clubbing but never smoke. Only Drink. Sometimes when I don't feel like it I don;t drink also. Just dance. WHY NOT?
If i dun drink .. music dont sound as good as it is.. -
Cuz honestly, clubbing music sucks most of the time. It's only good when the place is quieter.Originally posted by BadzMaro:Good on u man..
If i dun drink .. music dont sound as good as it is.. -
So how? Break after xmas or now?
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still must pick auspicious date?Originally posted by mayday80:So how? Break after xmas or now?