Do you like me? do you like me not? -
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Talking abt which, I think I know of a Leo who behaves somewhat like that too!Originally posted by Yunhaier:
He is confused and not too sure about his next move.
Therefore, he's reserving seat for himself.
He reserved his seat by treating you beyond that of a friend (or seemingly so), but should someone else need the 'seat', he wouldn't mind giving it up to that someone who appreciate it more than him.
He's just reserving it, not doing anything practical with it.
He probably suppressed his affection because he feels that he don't have the position to chase (or rather leaving it to circumstance to make decision for his fate in love).
You could say he is stagnant with decisions he ought to make... being apathetic with the new future he could pursue.
He behaves like me... and since Bontakun mentioned it too.... I would have guess...
Is he a Leo?
Cheers
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when u say it like tt..Originally posted by YouDonKnowMe:Talking abt which, I think I know of a Leo who behaves somewhat like that too!
u make me scared of him -_- -
thanks, i like sheep. actually my friends call me sheep.Originally posted by Vindictiv3:Hahaha i love your nick..
sounds so cute.
errr anyways back to topic..
well i know right now if i ask..
my chances are prob zero.
my intitution tells me he just treat me like a friend.
but as usual ur blasted heart never listens to ur head.
it just picks up details and start putting hopes into ur head to torture u
for the fun of it.I swear my heart has some SM fetish hidden somewhere.
i do treasure his friendship alot..
thats why right now im not even thinking of me and him.
mainly i just want him to be ok, i want to help him move on in his life.
cause the way he talks and explain about how they broke up.
the reasons etc etc.
we both feel like shes not right for him, no point having him cling onto her for years and later on fall in love with someone else yet cant let go of her cause hes used to her.then he'll have even a bigger dillemma.
i want to let him feel that leaving sumtin that u dun love, but just plainly a habit of having.
is not difficult, its just tedious but do-able.
show him that he deserves something better aswel.
looks like you know exactly what to do, and I think I know exactly what you mean, your heart wanted more, but your brain tells you its not possible yet. I think you are handling it quite well, and hes lucky to have you as a friend, you're not pushing him, and for some, even if he like you, asking flat out his feelings and forcing a yes-no answer from him might made him feel cornered, and avoid you altogether. given his "unstable" state, it is not surprising he will react that way. goodluck. -
Are you somebody I know?Originally posted by Sheepophile:thanks, i like sheep. actually my friends call me sheep.
looks like you know exactly what to do, and I think I know exactly what you mean, your heart wanted more, but your brain tells you its not possible yet. I think you are handling it quite well, and hes lucky to have you as a friend, you're not pushing him, and for some, even if he like you, asking flat out his feelings and forcing a yes-no answer from him might made him feel cornered, and avoid you altogether. given his "unstable" state, it is not surprising he will react that way. goodluck. 
Cheers -
I think he just enjoys caring for someone & craves companionship, and you're there for that purpose. But he isn't ready for a relationship.
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Originally posted by Bontakun:You know, he behaves like me or I behave like him.
So am I a player too? I only know the similarity ended when he has issues with his ex.
All I know is, he seems to be a good, genuine friend with no ulterior motives. How he cared for the thread starter shows he valued the friendship alot. Of course there is the "perform the act very well" in which it shows he has an ulterior motive, but lets give him a benefit of a doubt.
If there is a chance I would like to meet this guy and befriend him.
Originally posted by Yunhaier: He is confused and not too sure about his next move.
Therefore, he's reserving seat for himself.
He reserved his seat by treating you beyond that of a friend (or seemingly so), but should someone else need the 'seat', he wouldn't mind giving it up to that someone who appreciate it more than him.
He's just reserving it, not doing anything practical with it.
He probably suppressed his affection because he feels that he don't have the position to chase (or rather leaving it to circumstance to make decision for his fate in love).
You could say he is stagnant with decisions he ought to make... being apathetic with the new future he could pursue.
He behaves like me... and since Bontakun mentioned it too.... I would have guess...
Is he a Leo?
Cheers -
Originally posted by Vindictiv3:
Don't be too early to bet on that....?
[b]actually its not a time limit..
he asked me if he could get over her, i told him im sure he would,
he asked me how long would it take? how long would he suffer the pain?
i told him give it time, i told him i'll take care of him, in half a year i'll make sure he'll be alright!
one reason was because i wanted to give him a goal to get over her.
in life u cannot move forward unless uve a clear goal if not u'll be loss.
in another, i do feel that half a year should be enough for him to be normal without her again since he doesnt excactly love her.
and i do have faith in him, hes a strong guy.[/b]
Hmm... Could end up a tricky situation? -
Originally posted by Vindictiv3:
True and fair enough...
Normally i would do that too..
but his character..somehow ..for him..
i feel like i know him, yet i feel like i dunno him.
its easy to say just tell the person outright.
but u forgot.
to some people, if they dun feel the same towards the other person.
they would start feeling awkward and drift away to avoid trouble.
I dun feel like i want to take such a big risk..
i dunno how he'll react.
i dun want later on regretting that i told him if he chose to drift away further and lose the friendship.
cause right now, im content of what it is now, we accompanying each other as friends.
Its just that my feelings cant help but wish for more yet at the same time i do not want to lose his friendship if i happen to confess and he doesnt feel the same way.
if somehow i know that he doesnt feel for me, den i would shut up and convince myself that i shouldnt look too much into his niceness rather than lose his frienship if i confess and he reacts to it badly. [b]
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Why so? It's just merely assumptions and discussions among themselves... Don't too easily drift okie...?Originally posted by Vindictiv3:when u say it like tt..
u make me scared of him -_-
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if i liked a girl, i would never ever talk about my ex in front of her. especially the stuff he said..
so yeah.. -
ya, me too. if i like a guy, i will never show him im sad over my ex or the past with my ex. it is a type of respect, methink.Originally posted by OO_OO_OO:if i liked a girl, i would never ever talk about my ex in front of her. especially the stuff he said..
so yeah.. -
I will only do so when I'm fully over her, and when my gf knows I'm over me ex.Originally posted by OO_OO_OO:if i liked a girl, i would never ever talk about my ex in front of her. especially the stuff he said..
so yeah.. -
Bleah but maybe its a cetain kinda sharing? closeness?Originally posted by OO_OO_OO:if i liked a girl, i would never ever talk about my ex in front of her. especially the stuff he said..
so yeah..
sharing his problems??
frankly ive no issue about talkin about exs..
some people make it sound like a taboo.
Its something we should be open about, the way we feel, our past.
Whats the point of veiling it away from the person u wish to be close with??
if the person cant accept it things that u actually had an ex,
then that person isnt accepting reality or obviously not mature enough.
would u want such a person? -
hahaha ofcourse not!Originally posted by Devil1976:Why so? It's just merely assumptions and discussions among themselves... Don't too easily drift okie...?
but its always good to see the diff points of view that sometimes u alone cant cover.
plus they do have the logic in there. -
Not that. Rather, if it is the past, why want to talk and dwell in it. Unless, it is not the past yet, ie, memories of your ex and your past still haunting you, now, that is another problem.Originally posted by Vindictiv3:Bleah but maybe its a cetain kinda sharing? closeness?
sharing his problems??
frankly ive no issue about talkin about exs..
some people make it sound like a taboo.
Its something we should be open about, the way we feel, our past.
Whats the point of veiling it away from the person u wish to be close with??
if the person cant accept it things that u actually had an ex,
then that person isnt accepting reality or obviously not mature enough.
would u want such a person? -
Hahaha well..Originally posted by blu_sky:Not that. Rather, if it is the past, why want to talk and dwell in it. Unless, it is not the past yet, ie, memories of your ex and your past still haunting you, now, that is another problem.
when i was down, i did talk about the past and how i miss my ex to him.
but after 3 months or so..
now i talked to him like its a good memory, nothing else.
it was something apart of my life.
i told tt guy if i could get over it, im sure he can.
did u think it was rude to talk about exs in a way like its ur past and nothing else when the conversation somehow steers to tt topic,to someone u like? -
I think it is a form of respect to his feelings.Originally posted by Vindictiv3:Hahaha well..
when i was down, i did talk about the past and how i miss my ex to him.
but after 3 months or so..
now i talked to him like its a good memory, nothing else.
it was something apart of my life.
i told tt guy if i could get over it, im sure he can.
did u think it was rude to talk about exs in a way like its ur past and nothing else when the conversation somehow steers to tt topic,to someone u like? -
Sometimes too much logics just confuses ya...?Originally posted by Vindictiv3:hahaha ofcourse not!
but its always good to see the diff points of view that sometimes u alone cant cover.
plus they do have the logic in there.
End of the day, you'll still have to remember that you're involved in a relationship situation and not in the middle of a Math quiz competition...
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I'll take relationships to maths qui anyday!!Originally posted by Devil1976:Sometimes too much logics just confuses ya...?
End of the day, you'll still have to remember that you're involved in a relationship situation and not in the middle of a Math quiz competition... -
I suppose...Originally posted by blu_sky:I think it is a form of respect to his feelings.
Im too open for my own good sometimes..
Maybe its because i grew up in a western family lol.
daddy has always been very open and honest about things.
i just learn from him, somehow i dun find it very wrong to talk about anything as long as it doesnt majorly affect the person.
respect for me is mainly when u dun hurt the persons feeling too much. -
sometimes you wouldnt know until you hurt the person's feelings. Just like the other thread, the gal told the bf/bf-to-be about her ex, and he was badly hurt. i guess for me, i rather not take the risk.Originally posted by Vindictiv3:I suppose...
Im too open for my own good sometimes..
Maybe its because i grew up in a western family lol.
daddy has always been very open and honest about things.
i just learn from him, somehow i dun find it very wrong to talk about anything as long as it doesnt majorly affect the person.
respect for me is mainly when u dun hurt the persons feeling too much. -
ah Yun also Leo meh?Originally posted by Bontakun:
indeed TS reminds me of Leo leh..
i think u two will know wat I mean by that. -
It's the past... yes... when we have spent a certain amount of time with our partners, they too become part of our past....Originally posted by blu_sky:Not that. Rather, if it is the past, why want to talk and dwell in it. Unless, it is not the past yet, ie, memories of your ex and your past still haunting you, now, that is another problem.
he's part of my history...
ok let's say that my bf and i come acrossed something that reminded me of an amusing incident that took place in my poly years.... I want to share that with my bf..... that's ok right?
but if that incident involves my ex?
does that make the incident unmentionable?
I believe that talking about your ex is ok.... but only to a certain extend.... if u find yourself making reference to your ex too much, that's something to be avoided...
Both you and your gf must know where each other stand... if i know for sure he's over his ex, the fact that he talks about his ex every once in a while is fine... -
when i say, refrain talking about ex. that means ex is the subject.Originally posted by smudgey:It's the past... yes... when we have spent a certain amount of time with our partners, they too become part of our past....
he's part of my history...
ok let's say that my bf and i come acrossed something that reminded me of an amusing incident that took place in my poly years.... I want to share that with my bf..... that's ok right?
but if that incident involves my ex?
does that make the incident unmentionable?
I believe that talking about your ex is ok.... but only to a certain extend.... if u find yourself making reference to your ex too much, that's something to be avoided...
Both you and your gf must know where each other stand... if i know for sure he's over his ex, the fact that he talks about his ex every once in a while is fine...
but in your instance, that incident is the subject, not your ex rite? -
yeap..
it just happen to have my ex inside..
it isnt about him.
I dun wish to talk about him either lol