Love has no reason?
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yes to this one.Originally posted by blu_sky:Really? wont they be 'offended' that they kena fxxked? or they simply need this to wake them up?
especially being hit on the head with a hairspray can -
well of cos i wun scold him as in using a loud voice and such...I will just express my displeasure in a "gentler" wayOriginally posted by blu_sky:Really? wont they be 'offended' that they kena fxxked? or they simply need this to wake them up?
I will just let him know that I am not happy with whatever he has been doing and would appreciate it if he would change...and sometimes I would feel like I am nagging so I would apologize for it, but he said it is okie, because it helps to let him know what he has been doing wrong so that he won't continue in that way... -
But that's gonna take time isn't it? Love takes time to grow. TS's bf seems to be rushing her so much so that she didnt hv a chance to truly experience and explore that herself.Originally posted by rainee:that's infatuation, not love.
Love is when you can already see the flaws of the person, and accept it as part and parcel of him...and you know that his goodness outweighs the flaws
That's when the insecurity comes in.
And where are you kuri? How's things? -
It depends. If the man is wrong, he'd better apologise and not be a coward. If he's not, he should not. This is situational.Originally posted by blu_sky:means 'guo fen' in chinese. doing something not acceptable or not thoughtful more than once or twice?
Can you give me a simple example?
doko -
Yea, if it is just two weeks since she has been going out with him, it is still too soon for her to decide. And I think she is also in the wrong for letting the guy touches her in the intimate way, because this leads the guy into thinking she is ready for a romantic r/s (after all friends don't really touch each other intimately). So can't blame him for hurrying her because she is showing signs that she wants to be involved in a r/s, yet she still doesnt wan to make it official?Originally posted by YouDonKnowMe:But that's gonna take time isn't it? Love takes time to grow. TS's bf seems to be rushing her so much so that she didnt hv a chance to truly experience and explore that herself.
That's when the insecurity comes in.
And where are you kuri? How's things?
This can be very frustrating for a guy. -
sometimes expressing displeasure gently to them wont work, thats why they keep repeating it, thats why kena fxxk them. i think thats wat my colleagues mean.Originally posted by rainee:well of cos i wun scold him as in using a loud voice and such...I will just express my displeasure in a "gentler" way I will just let him know that I am not happy with whatever he has been doing and would appreciate it if he would change...and sometimes I would feel like I am nagging so I would apologize for it, but he said it is okie, because it helps to let him know what he has been doing wrong so that he won't continue in that way...
is that true? -
I LOVE this line! Must stash it away for future reference and perhaps use it on my dear in future to come!Originally posted by rainee:Love is when you can already see the flaws of the person, and accept it as part and parcel of him...and you know that his goodness outweighs the flaws -
hmm i express it in different ways...after i mention it once or twice and still dun show any signs of changing, i will get into my cold war modeOriginally posted by blu_sky:sometimes expressing displeasure gently to them wont work, thats why they keep repeating it, thats why kena fxxk them. i think thats wat my colleagues mean.
is that true?
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So what's the cause of the chemistry you think? You like his face more than other guys?Originally posted by rainee:simply cos i have no chemistry for them
the feeling is either there or not, if it is not there i dun waste my time leading them on
doko -
hmm...it is just something he has that others dun have. it can be the way he speaks, can be the way he looks at me, can be about just anything about.Originally posted by dokono:So what's the cause of the chemistry you think? You like his face more than other guys?
doko
simply stated, it is the thing that makes him unique.
i guess it is not really that easy to define chemistry -
Originally posted by YouDonKnowMe:
I [b]LOVE this line! Must stash it away for future reference and perhaps use it on my dear in future to come! [/b]
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hmmm... for eg. you 2 have agreed on not getting drunk. but when he goes drinking, he get pissed drunk, once, twice and third time it is the time to show him some color?Originally posted by dokono:It depends. If the man is wrong, he'd better apologise and not be a coward. If he's not, he should not. This is situational.
Can you give me a simple example?
doko -
Still I think it's not correct to get too touchy feely. He can still control himself. That's part of being a gentleman.Originally posted by rainee:Yea, if it is just two weeks since she has been going out with him, it is still too soon for her to decide. And I think she is also in the wrong for letting the guy touches her in the intimate way, because this leads the guy into thinking she is ready for a romantic r/s (after all friends don't really touch each other intimately). So can't blame him for hurrying her because she is showing signs that she wants to be involved in a r/s, yet she still doesnt wan to make it official?
This can be very frustrating for a guy.
doko -
Actually i had been through that before, i meant keep being rushed into a relationship. it felt really suffocating and like you said, no chance to experience and explore it myself.Originally posted by YouDonKnowMe:But that's gonna take time isn't it? Love takes time to grow. TS's bf seems to be rushing her so much so that she didnt hv a chance to truly experience and explore that herself.
That's when the insecurity comes in.
And where are you kuri? How's things? -
I wld say the guy had it coming on himself.Originally posted by rainee:
Yea, if it is just two weeks since she has been going out with him, it is still too soon for her to decide. And I think she is also in the wrong for letting the guy touches her in the intimate way, because this leads the guy into thinking she is ready for a romantic r/s (after all friends don't really touch each other intimately). So can't blame him for hurrying her because she is showing signs that she wants to be involved in a r/s, yet she still doesnt wan to make it official?
This can be very frustrating for a guy.[/quote]
I must however beg to differ on this. Some guys are just so insistent, though of cos, a lady must learnt how to say "no" firmly and not just let the feeling of possible love and dizziness overwhelm her. That is most probably why she is confused. She is sincerely hoping for true love and this guy out of nowhere is proclaiming that to her IMMEDIATELY even before she gets to know him well. She is confused because she knows not whether to accept or not and this guy is hurrying her to make a decision. That is why she doesn't want to make it official.Originally posted by rainee:
In my point of view, she didnt show the signs (if you had refer to earlier posts kuri made), the guy MADE her think she is showing the signs.
So can't blame him for hurrying her because she is showing signs that she wants to be involved in a r/s, yet she still doesnt wan to make it official?
I think the guy is not respecting the girl enough. More on pushing kuri to where he wants to go.
[quote]Originally posted by rainee:This can be very frustrating for a guy.
p/s: this would be an example of what I meant by self-centeredness, doko. -
Wooo gentleman dokoOriginally posted by dokono:Still I think it's not correct to get too touchy feely. He can still control himself. That's part of being a gentleman.
doko
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For your example, it depends how much you can tolerate his character. Let's say he treats you well and you love him for him but it's just his habit of drinking.Originally posted by blu_sky:hmmm... for eg. you 2 have agreed on not getting drunk. but when he goes drinking, he get pissed drunk, once, twice and third time it is the time to show him some color?
As you know, some men like to drink a lot and it can get beyond control point. But this goes to his own discipline and how much he has it.
doko -
it is rather hard to control himself when the girl herself doesnt protest, dun u think?Originally posted by dokono:Still I think it's not correct to get too touchy feely. He can still control himself. That's part of being a gentleman.
doko
I read somewhere that says men will never take silence or a feeble no as an answer and will continue with their advances, only when the girl stood up and loudly say no he will take note that he is doing the wrong thing -
Ah...Originally posted by rainee:it is rather hard to control himself when the girl herself doesnt protest, dun u think?
I read somewhere that says men will never take silence or a feeble no as an answer and will continue with their advances, only when the girl stood up and loudly say no he will take note that he is doing the wrong thing
Not all men will. Some respect the girl. Some will take advantage, with this thinking: if it's free, why not? So which do you prefer? Don't be brainwashed by this stupid article. Some articles are not helpful.
doko -
i agree.Originally posted by rainee:it is rather hard to control himself when the girl herself doesnt protest, dun u think?
I read somewhere that says men will never take silence or a feeble no as an answer and will continue with their advances, only when the girl stood up and loudly say no he will take note that he is doing the wrong thing
men take body language as a signal, no protest as green light. or would you expect a man to ask a gal "can i kiss you" before kissing her? "can i undress you" before undressing her? -
ok...but i still believe the girl plays a part also. She needs to know how to say no. First she should sort out her feelings first, not just keep going on dates and letting this guy does whatever he wants before she is sure of her own feelings towards him.Originally posted by dokono:Ah...
Not all men will. Some respect the girl. Some will take advantage, with this thinking: if it's free, why not? So which do you prefer? Don't be brainwashed by this stupid article. Some articles are not helpful.
doko -
Maybe should post a topic on "How to Say No" to help the women here?Originally posted by rainee:ok...but i still believe the girl plays a part also. She needs to know how to say no. First she should sort out her feelings first, not just keep going on dates and letting this guy does whatever he wants before she is sure of her own feelings towards him. -
Still working on it.Originally posted by YouDonKnowMe:Wooo gentleman doko
doko -
Cos you know, not all girls are that savvy. It boils down to character & personality too.
The worst combination is to hv a little lamby girl to date a wolfish guy No one will exactly know how your date will be like if you dont date right? -
That's the problem. I see your point but the man can control it. It's not too late when her heart is with him and when they are in a relationship isn't it? They can do whatever monkey business they want right?Originally posted by rainee:ok...but i still believe the girl plays a part also. She needs to know how to say no. First she should sort out her feelings first, not just keep going on dates and letting this guy does whatever he wants before she is sure of her own feelings towards him.
doko