How to Encourage?
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How to exert influence?Originally posted by rainee:when his mom called me yesterday, she said i shud exert enuff influence to be able to make his son stay in school and make sure that he doesnt give up. but judging from the way he treats me and his studies now, dun think I am able to do that.
So I am more worried abt dat. Of cos I can say nice and encouraging words every now and then but when he is not even in class, how to say it to him?
Unless you can be like his friends...
There are ways to encourage him even if he's not around. Letters, emails, whatever possible. -
Hmm...Originally posted by rainee:i did this last time but when i elaborate too much they cannot understand the words i use
I go think first. -
Sometimes I feel like I am doing too much, you know what I mean?Originally posted by ndmmxiaomayi:How to exert influence?
Unless you can be like his friends...
There are ways to encourage him even if he's not around. Letters, emails, whatever possible. -
*nod nod*Originally posted by rainee:yea lor...
I am concerned cos my manager oso brought this up to me, cos his mom called her...then she sounded so concerned that I thought I should at least do something for this student...but just now when I asked her to give me the mom's phone number so that I can at least let the mom know about the outcome of my talk and the student yesterday, she said dun need liao...
so i guess i shud wash my hands off this matter...later i do more they said i m being kaypo -
I think I know. TV got show this kind of students + teacher.Originally posted by rainee:Sometimes I feel like I am doing too much, you know what I mean?
Since you've done everything you can, your job is done. What's left, is up to him already... -
yea lor, suddenly feels like i m in one of those situations always shown in a school drama oneOriginally posted by ndmmxiaomayi:I think I know. TV got show this kind of students + teacher.
Since you've done everything you can, your job is done. What's left, is up to him already... -
Now that education has become a "service industry", parents expect teachers to come in where they have failed. I think the root of the problem is the family. That problem we cannot help.
That aside, it is certainly possible to "make it big" without education qualifications. But as with all successful people, they have a plan and the execute the plan well. If he says he can be successful without education, ask him what his plans are. Guide him through the thinking process.
Help him to find out what he really wants and to set pragmatic plans to achieve them.
Ultimately, he has to take ownership of his future. You can only do so much. -
Yea I dun mind talking to him...but thing is he really doesn't want to talk, and kept saying he is busy and gave me the impression that I shudnt keep him any longerOriginally posted by sillyme:Now that education has become a "service industry", parents expect teachers to come in where they have failed. I think the root of the problem is the family. That problem we cannot help.
That aside, it is certainly possible to "make it big" without education qualifications. But as with all successful people, they have a plan and the execute the plan well. If he says he can be successful without education, ask him what his plans are. Guide him through the thinking process.
Help him to find out what he really wants and to set pragmatic plans to achieve them.
Ultimately, he has to take ownership of his future. You can only do so much. -
Originally posted by rainee:yea lor, suddenly feels like i m in one of those situations always shown in a school drama one
this one?
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err, one thing is this guy doesnt look like the guy in the picOriginally posted by Ito_^:
this one?
but i m interested to watch this movie -
Make an appointment with him. Find out when he is not busy.Originally posted by rainee:Yea I dun mind talking to him...but thing is he really doesn't want to talk, and kept saying he is busy and gave me the impression that I shudnt keep him any longer
Or pay him a visit at his home.
It will take some effort lor... -
Tell him to look at the ahpeks who work at hawker centre, picking up trash can for a living, obviously they didnt plan for that in their youths which made them the trash can pickers cos they wont upgrade and nobody needs em. Even macdonald uncle need to know basic english.
Everyone else will look down on him eventually in years to come and he will be an outcast. Those who dropped school and became successful cos they are street smart and had a goal to work for since from an early age,but their path is tougher than other educated people. -
Perhaps, he is feels that his parents are giving him pressure or maybe, facing some emotional stress?
another possibility is that the course that he is handling now is not that interest him.
the soultion to this is could be that try not to persue this matter too much, rather let him knw that you are there for him when he needs anyone, if he wants he can turn to you, but do not make it sound like you are the only one he can turn to give space to let him turn to his frens, he may feel better. Let him know that whtever his problems are, he's not alone, and you are a friend rather than just a teacher.
well, if wht his parents told you is the truth, it makes no sense in persuading him to leave the group, instead, try to talk to him, let him understand that though there are pple out there making it make without much education, there are also many who can't make it with high quailifcation.
ask him this,
if studying cannot get him anywhere, wht makes him think that without qualification can get him anywhere?
those making it big out there, without much higher eudaction has better luck and chances, and can he be 100% sure that his luck would be just as good as them?
this would naturally add to your own stress in life, but if you would like to help him, be prepared for it, i guess.. -
You done your best, so don't be sad.Originally posted by rainee:Sometimes I feel like I am doing too much, you know what I mean? -
Patience. For now he dun feel like opening up. Just dun give up on him can liao. For now just do your best to coach him, then after some time, maybe see results, then find chance to talk to him again.Originally posted by rainee:Yea I dun mind talking to him...but thing is he really doesn't want to talk, and kept saying he is busy and gave me the impression that I shudnt keep him any longer -
Linguistic problem already there, and that fellow doesn't have much time left.Originally posted by Bontakun:Patience. For now he dun feel like opening up. Just dun give up on him can liao. For now just do your best to coach him, then after some time, maybe see results, then find chance to talk to him again. -
talk his language - eg: talk computer games if he is interest in games
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Even so shouldn't give up juz liddat mah. Being teacher is not simply teach the subjects in school, but oso teach subjects in life as well. But to do dat muz have patience, even if seemed little time.Originally posted by Herzog_Zwei:Linguistic problem already there, and that fellow doesn't have much time left. -
Bontakun,Originally posted by Bontakun:Even so shouldn't give up juz liddat mah. Being teacher is not simply teach the subjects in school, but oso teach subjects in life as well. But to do dat muz have patience, even if seemed little time.
Rainie has hit the limit in her albility. You can try bring the horse to water but you can't make it drink. Firstly, the teacher and student has problem communicating. Secondly, the student has decided that it is not worth his time to continue in this course but missing out on lessons. Lastly, there isn't enough time to deal with his linguistic disability as well as his lack of studies. -
We all think she hit the limits, but only she herself know very well where is the limit. If the student is really bent on giving up, then the family and upper heads should know it too, but still shouldn't give up, for the student may some day be back? In any case, that's all can be done on Rainee's part, but being patient still is possible.Originally posted by Herzog_Zwei:Bontakun,
Rainie has hit the limit in her albility. You can try bring the horse to water but you can't make it drink. Firstly, the teacher and student has problem communicating. Secondly, the student has decided that it is not worth his time to continue in this course but missing out on lessons. Lastly, there isn't enough time to deal with his linguistic disability as well as his lack of studies. -
do you want to try going out where he hang out usually?
at the same time try to show him evil side of Johor?
how some poor guy @ his age ,make for living?
In johor there are very poor people but dream to have proper education
would you like to arrange for him to see?
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the student surprisingly turned up for his lesson yesterday
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Dats good. Be patient with him. Den we see wat happen next.Originally posted by rainee:the student surprisingly turned up for his lesson yesterday -
i think he dislikes me giving attention to him, as in he seems to be like an extremely shy person...and as i tried to be fair to all of my students, sometimes I will call on them to answer some questions I asked in class. But this student will refuse to answer and look painfully shy that I have tend to avoid calling on him...dunno if I shud do this and whether he will think it is unfair...Originally posted by Bontakun:Dats good. Be patient with him. Den we see wat happen next. -
If he shy, then you dun give him the attention dat much for now. Find some time alone to talk to him about it. Tell him you wanna train his guts because its important in his life.Originally posted by rainee:i think he dislikes me giving attention to him, as in he seems to be like an extremely shy person...and as i tried to be fair to all of my students, sometimes I will call on them to answer some questions I asked in class. But this student will refuse to answer and look painfully shy that I have tend to avoid calling on him...dunno if I shud do this and whether he will think it is unfair...