why some pple mostly girls cut themselves on their hand ?
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My bad... My focus wasn't really meant to be on you... But just hope you'll understand that you can't simply provide solutions based on your experience alone... You seems too confident and really however dispatching a wrong type of method as to how the others should handle such type of people... If the others just follow what yuo've suggested, they could have so easily caused so much more grief if not death to the victims we're concerned with... Hence, pardon me.. But I'll have to mention. It's my job.Originally posted by viciouskitty74:And my postings are regards to what "I" seen.
Not about me either. It turns the other direction didnt it. When it should have been focused on the threadstarter. -
So why opt to subtract the only solution so far because it was that miniscule as it was someone's real life experience?Originally posted by Devil1976:It's not so a simple situation. Based on such little information.. I rather opt not to give any specific advice. Hope that answer your question?
i didnt see you opting to provide any better. -
Sorry, but I really fail to understand you...?Originally posted by viciouskitty74:a simple question to why.
a simple answer to that why.
and some more 'its not so simple and its cryptic'
with an additional, IT IS CRYPTIC. -
Getting attention...? Not really in the cases described by smudgey I suppose?Originally posted by viciouskitty74:he is right. its one of the cause of self inflicted injuries. which still boils down on getting attention. best explained as diverting attentiion too.
I concur.
Diverting attention... Hmm... Maybe? -
its okay. i expected it. too shallow, i know.Originally posted by Devil1976:Sorry, but I really fail to understand you...? -
Getting attention...? Not really in the cases described by smudgey I suppose?Originally posted by viciouskitty74:he is right. its one of the cause of self inflicted injuries. which still boils down on getting attention. best explained as diverting attentiion too.
I concur.
Diverting attention... Hmm... Maybe? -
Because it's unlikely to be the 'right' answer... Because there probably won't be a 'standard one-faced' answer which can apply to such a general case with so many quite different possibilities to come...Originally posted by viciouskitty74:So why opt to subtract the only solution so far because it was that miniscule as it was someone's real life experience?
i didnt see you opting to provide any better.
I didn't provide any better is because I admit... I couldn't.
In fact, to be honest with you.. Even give MUCH more information on the TS's friend situation, I doubt it would really be such an easy task to come to a good theoreotical answer..Not to mention one which could be too easily bring across to easy practical application.... -
they're just seeking attention making you guilty.. stupidly.. let them be.. unless they cut their faces, then you know it's serious.. girls WONT cut their faces under ANY circumstances.. regular ones at least.. if they cut their hands etc, just seeking attention, pretending to be emo.. leave them alone..
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Yes. Sometimes..? VERY INDEED....Originally posted by viciouskitty74:its okay. i expected it. too shallow, i know. -
Yes. You are right. They probably would have killed themselves before they get to their face?Originally posted by blue_crimson_89:they're just seeking attention making you guilty.. stupidly.. let them be.. unless they cut their faces, then you know it's serious.. girls WONT cut their faces under ANY circumstances.. regular ones at least.. if they cut their hands etc, just seeking attention, pretending to be emo.. leave them alone.. -
they would have jumped off the 12th storey building instead of wasting so much time dealing with pain.Originally posted by Devil1976:Yes. You are right. They probably would have killed themselves before they get to their face? -
There are many ways to stop them. A few are illustrated here as mentioned. You can also use 'violence' to stop them (eg: going in by force, restraining them, bringing them to IMH, hospitals, have them receive appropriate treatments). Although that is very last resort to me...Originally posted by ghimpheng:how to stop them from doing that ?
However every case of 'self-infliction' is different and special. No one way, which could have been effective for one or more cases, is effective all the times.
If I were to encounter these people who have a tendancy for self-hurting, I would have to tread carefully as with any other cases (suicide, depression, etc) and read up on as many case studies as possible to further understand the issue at hand. I would let them know I am approachable and they can trust me, thus they can tell me what is going on. If they are unwilling to trust me, I will get help.
Its just me and how limited my knowledge is to enable me to come up with this plan so far... I wish I know more... -
No... Then you've underestimated the power of psychlogical struggles...Originally posted by viciouskitty74:they would have jumped off the 12th storey building instead of wasting so much time dealing with pain. -
Okay...i would say say culture will play different part to power of psychological struggles.Originally posted by Devil1976:No... Then you've underestimated the power of psychlogical struggles...
textbook answers made available to general does not apply to everyone. individual experienced and direct answers do. and directs answers derived from understanding local culture & hitting the nail on its head instead of dragging the foot around to cushion the blow. -
So now you are accusing me of giving advise that result in the females in questions cutting themself to go kill themself?Originally posted by Devil1976:My bad... My focus wasn't really meant to be on you... But just hope you'll understand that you can't simply provide solutions based on your experience alone... You seems too confident and really however dispatching a wrong type of method as to how the others should handle such type of people... If the others just follow what yuo've suggested, they could have so easily caused so much more grief if not death to the victims we're concerned with... Hence, pardon me.. But I'll have to mention. It's my job.
Wow....
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Wow......Originally posted by viciouskitty74:Do they aspire to the SIA Girl? Or a possible model or actress?
Very simple. tells them, during the recruitment interviews, the recruiter will first look for scars.
Got scar. Sorry, you will never be accepted.
Happens to a g/f of mine, and I told her off about it.
And yes. The Human Resource Officers of good companies do look for such signs and refuse to employ such gals.
They should go kill themself instead huh? -
Just curious why are you quoting your own post?Originally posted by viciouskitty74:Wow......
They should go kill themself instead huh?
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well, i was just still too stubborn to see that I was advising the TS's to go get their friends killed or to kill their friends.Originally posted by DeadPoet:Just curious why are you quoting your own post? -
Copied from Aunt Agony Forum, Are the Moderators Certified? thread.
~~~~~~Originally posted by Gedanken:Hmm. I've read through the linked thread and it's, um, interesting.
Speaking not only as a practicing psychologist but as someone who's worked with abused children for years, I'll come at this from a practicioner's perspective.
I agree with kitty that textbook answers don't really offer much help. However, generalising from personal experiences is precipitous as well, and if the person you're trying to help thinks you're being ignorant, you'll be shoved well behind square one.
The fact is that the motivation for self-harm varies on a case-by-case basis. Yes, some people are just drama queens, and in such cases an REBT approach, such as kitty's SIA girl example, might work. On the other hand, REBT, when used in the wrong situation, can lead to things going pear-shaped very rapidly. For that matter, any approach used in the wrong context will produce detrimental results.
This leads to the point that, as a rule, any competent practicioner would know to perform some proper fact-finding before attempting to generate solutions. Self-harm (or any observed behaviour) is only the symptom, not the problem itself. Fix one symptom and another will pop up to take its place.
The underlying problem also dictates how effective the solution is. The DSM-IV (the diagnostic bible) lists self-harm as a diagnostic criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. A BPD person would be highly unlikely to have any interest in being a flying waitress for SIA, or any other airline for that matter.
The bottom line is that what's good for the goose is not always good for the gander, and jumping off the mark to close one door isn't going to do any good if the rest of the building's on fire. You always need to make a point to find out what's going on before offering solutions - doing so too early is just a waste of time.
Anyway, for what it's worth (about a hundred bucks by the reckoning of the APS), that's a professional's take on this debate. -
I understand what you're trying to get at... But it's really a based on per case basis that you can offer to handle a 'victim' a different way... And if they do happens to fall under the context you've mentioned.. Yes... It's quite unwise to feed them with more than enough attention they're already having... But applying your 'solution' to people who might really be needing that 'attention' and help would mean doing something quite drastic to them... Including the fact that you might be driving them up the wall...Originally posted by viciouskitty74:Okay...i would say say culture will play different part to power of psychological struggles.
textbook answers made available to general does not apply to everyone. individual experienced and direct answers do. and directs answers derived from understanding local culture & hitting the nail on its head instead of dragging the foot around to cushion the blow. -
i just saw your great post today trendzOriginally posted by trendz:It is not the hand, it's the wrist you dumbf*ck!
and kids like you who induldge in infatuation with 'em drove 'em to desperation once they caught a glimpse of your f*ckface I guess.
and thanks kitty for saying something to help me
i think we are here to discuss solutions on how to help them instead of you drifting out of topic
football should be set aside from this topic if u want to continue flaming please do so in sports flamebox -
hello did someone call me ?
kitty i am innocent between you and devil "Discussion"
please don't drag me in it !
very hard to ask them to stop unless u are someone close to them
they find it stress relieving when they do that just like some of the pple find it stress relieving in smoking -
Originally posted by ghimpheng:hello did someone call me ?
kitty i am innocent between you and devil "Discussion"
please don't drag me in it !
very hard to ask them to stop unless u are someone close to them
they find it stress relieving when they do that just like some of the pple find it stress relieving in smoking -
Yah....in the middle centuries. There was quack doctors that prescribe patients to let out blood once in a while to relieve build up toxins or whatever.Originally posted by ghimpheng:they find it stress relieving when they do that just like some of the pple find it stress relieving in smoking
I remember reading somewhere, some King Henry's wife, once a month, will have a doctor come, do a small cut on her ankles to release some blood flow.
Says to cure her of hysterial? -
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