why some pple mostly girls cut themselves on their hand ?
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100th reply... V
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.......Originally posted by Devil1976:100th reply... V -
Yes? VOriginally posted by viciouskitty74:.......
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don't laugh sleep more you lack of sleepOriginally posted by Devil1976: 
So Any1 know of a Super Effective way to stop them pls post here thanks -
that would really depend on WHY the are cuttind in the first placeOriginally posted by ghimpheng:don't laugh sleep more you lack of sleep
So Any1 know of a Super Effective way to stop them pls post here thanks
for 'fun'? because everyone else is doing it? its 'cool'?
or is it because they ARE depressed??
or some other reason?? -
The WHYs are essential to effectively curb this issue on individual scale.Originally posted by udontknowme:that would really depend on WHY the are cuttind in the first place
for 'fun'? because everyone else is doing it? its 'cool'?
or is it because they ARE depressed??
or some other reason?? -
Sooo....how do you guys suggest to curb this issue?Originally posted by M©+square:The WHYs are essential to effectively curb this issue on individual scale.
what to say? wat not to say? what is proven to be disasaterous? -
Generally speaking.Originally posted by viciouskitty74:Sooo....how do you guys suggest to curb this issue?
what to say? wat not to say? what is proven to be disasaterous?
Don't say anything, Listen first, seek to clarify the underlying reason. Gain Knowledge. Understand, empathise. Conselor will have to access on the next course of action from there.
With that said, if anyone are unable to Listen, Clarify, Understand the counselee's situation. Then it is best he/she don't attempt to help curb the problem.
Words of encouragement are often better than trying to provide 'help'.
It requires Commitment from a 'Helper' and Willingness from the 'Victim'
Everything is run case by case basis. -
Ok...scenerio basis.Originally posted by M©+square:Generally speaking.
Don't say anything, Listen first, seek to clarify the underlying reason. Gain Knowledge. Understand, empathise. Conselor will have to access on the next course of action from there.
With that said, if anyone are unable to Listen, Clarify, Understand the counselee's situation. Then it is best he/she don't attempt to help curb the problem.
Words of encouragement are often better than trying to provide 'help'.
It requires Commitment from a 'Helper' and Willingness from the 'Victim'
Everything is run case by case basis.
A gal goes on a outing with you. She accidently reveals scars on her hands.
On the next outing, you notice fresh scars on her hand.
How do you broach the subject? or you wait till she talks to you? -
It depends if i know her already, or someone whom i've just met.Originally posted by viciouskitty74:Ok...scenerio basis.
A gal goes on a outing with you. She accidently reveals scars on her hands.
On the next outing, you notice fresh scars on her hand.
How do you broach the subject? or you wait till she talks to you?
If it's the former, assuming that i already know her background a fair bit. I would(?) approach her and ask? Really depends on the bond which we've established.
If it's the latter, i wouldn't ask until i've assessed the situation and atmosphere(mainly on her) observe body language and speech pattern. I might(?) ask her due to my curious nature. OR i might hold and see.
Honestly, I would have ask her general topics which will eventually lead to personal questions without having confronting the actual issue.
If she doesn't want to answer, it's ok.
Pretty subjective, but at least we are going somewhere
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Not bad.Originally posted by M©+square:It depends if i know her already, or someone whom i've just met.
If it's the former, assuming that i already know her background a fair bit. I would(?) approach her and ask? Really depends on the bond which we've established.
If it's the latter, i wouldn't ask until i've assessed the situation and atmosphere(mainly on her) observe body language and speech pattern. I might(?) ask her due to my curious nature. OR i might hold and see.
Honestly, I would have ask her general topics which will eventually lead to personal questions without having confronting the actual issue.
If she doesn't want to answer, it's ok.
Pretty subjective, but at least we are going somewhere 
it at least was more directive then argumentative.
okay...so lets splinter in situation A, B, C, D & so on. -
Situation A.
You do know the gal, maybe she is a ex classmate from Sec Sch which you dont really talk to. she just broke off from her long time school sweetheart and is maybe having stress adjusting to a new job, a parent is very sick and is hospitalised or she just lost someone very dear to her.
Her family is lower middle class and if she dont work, she can feed her family. She is maybe even juggling 2 jobs, one night class at the same time.
How do you think will motivate her? -
Let me correct my spelling.
If she does not work, she cannot feed the family. -
Splinter B.
This gal, drives a family toyota, dont need to work because daddy has money and she has a imaginery job in her father's company.
She is unhappy and wants her b/f to marry her and take her away from maybe her qurralsome family.
her b/f dont want to marry her because they are so young. her marks are there because she felt that her life is too painful and she is heavily reliant on depressant and sleeping pills.
and after you had some heart to heart talk with her, she sms often enough to tell you she is so depressed and cut herself again.
what are the words you should not use to her? -
Splinter C.
This young lady, has a decent job in Hospitality Service. Lets say she is a Counter Customer Service Supervisor/manager.
She disliked her job and wanted to change for a more high flying job. And she is a pretty thing, having lots of admirers and is having a relationship with a married man.
On some occasions, the married man was unable to keep her company. She got depressed, swallowed 20 panadols, drink up a bottle of hard liqour and slashed her wrist. she was discovered in time and sent to a hospital.
her married man lover cannot go to the hospital to visit her.
She is depressed again after receiving sms from him and cut herself again.
What and where do you stand, as her friend to remind her "it isnt worth it".
take note: the young lady will just be crying and saying: "But I cannot forget him!" -
Splinter D.
a group of ah lians, most of them from the lower income family. Their family members are never around to discipline them or check on them.
then the ah lians decide they are sooo in love with some celebrity and feels that they need to show support to one of their 'long suffering' idol. So they try making marks on their arms, to take pictures and send to their idol.
What do you suggest will break that trend. -
I would joke that she had a run-in with concertina wire without protective equipment and show her my scars of my personal run-in. See how it goes from there.Originally posted by M©+square:It depends if i know her already, or someone whom i've just met.
If it's the former, assuming that i already know her background a fair bit. I would(?) approach her and ask? Really depends on the bond which we've established.
If it's the latter, i wouldn't ask until i've assessed the situation and atmosphere(mainly on her) observe body language and speech pattern. I might(?) ask her due to my curious nature. OR i might hold and see.
Honestly, I would have ask her general topics which will eventually lead to personal questions without having confronting the actual issue.
If she doesn't want to answer, it's ok.
Pretty subjective, but at least we are going somewhere -
Mostly depressed or influence from friends doing this help relieve stressOriginally posted by udontknowme:that would really depend on WHY the are cuttind in the first place
for 'fun'? because everyone else is doing it? its 'cool'?
or is it because they ARE depressed??
or some other reason??
and those who do it for fun or think that it is cool may as well them leave them alone and let them do it since they are so stupid
jk but those who think that it is fun or cool i don't really understand what so cool and fun about that
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dey gianz wat... play play around, but the lonely and sad part oso counts la.
but when the guys do it, den its a different thing...
its like when they slash em, its like for a "pledge of love", carving gf's names unnecessarily and making sure he's loyal and stuff..
and the other is pretty bo liao, its like slashing is like them saying " hey i slashed my wrists! i'm cool!" -
i am only here to +1
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they did it divert their own attention from other problems to physical pain and blood loss.
the scars are normally hideous... *tiger strips*
show guy cut themselves too... because they want to show the girls that they like the girls... but the girls in turned will be scared off by this type of action....
somethings like tattoo...
Girls also cut themselves when they are feeling stress out and they break up with the bf... or other things... which they does not have the solutions or no in the ability to achieve it...
they need like is the care and concern and consantly reminded them that it can be solved and they need a lot of attention...
they are not trying to show off, it is other ways of venting out the anger which they did not have the outlet to channel our pain...
This are often contributed to the surrounding factors....
1 case is that a girl declare her love to a guy and the guy snide at her being ugly and dun know her limit.... the nest things, she jumps off the building and committed suicide.... But the guy is not that handsome too, in fact the girl had better factors and charms... too bad , she jumps off the building...
The bloody scene is gross, she lay on the ground and a pool of blood is beside the head... brain juice.... gross....
Hear that she is bullied in school too, then the stupid school then tell the whole school to mourn for her.... damn it la.... then girl is already died then they do it.... a life... FUCK!!!! -
you should take a look at my hand too...
it is really a good way to relief stress...
i cant find any other method...
also a good way to vend your anger...
at least you fel the pain and know when to stop better then cutting other people right? -
Role-plays...?
Hmm.. -
Originally posted by popikachu:you should take a look at my hand too...
it is really a good way to relief stress...
i cant find any other method...
also a good way to vend your anger...
at least you fel the pain and know when to stop better then cutting other people right?
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A healthier habit which actually CAN be cultivated would be to find other healthier alternatives for 'stress relief'....
Though the method which you're currently using is already existing and perhaps widely used by some people... But it DOESN'T naturally means that it's a GOOD method...
If you bother to do 'soul search' and 'self-understanding'... You'll realise that your 'body' is actually a 'vessel' which your 'soul' (you) lives on... The condition and damage done on it can sometimes be irreversible... Treat yourself well and fair in order for yourself to function well and fair in return.... -
yes it does relief stress.Originally posted by popikachu:you should take a look at my hand too...
it is really a good way to relief stress...
i cant find any other method...
also a good way to vend your anger...
at least you fel the pain and know when to stop better then cutting other people right?
however i feel that you should use this method as a VERY LAST RESORT
when you really feel that there isnt ANY other way to deal with how with you feel
if it is pain that you want to feel, next time try to get a rubber band and twang it against your skin
if it's blood you need to see, try using a water-soluble red marker to draw on your arm or use red paint
or try to sleep it off
or just go out and take random walks
the terrible truth is that self-injury does help in a certain way
HOWEVER!!!! IT IS ADDICTIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so try all other methods you can think of before you cut.