Worrying of my gf past...
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i agree wholeheartedly with thisOriginally posted by browniebaobao:so honest.
guys that say "dun worry, i dun mind.. i only care about the present etc..."
at the back of their mind, he will remember de lor.
then u see whether he will treat u differently. of course not all, but like TS, he will surely go thru a mental struggle.. if can put it this way..
then one fine day he might ask u "since u did it with ur ex, y not do it with me?"
then u will regret.
"since u did it with ur ex, y not do it with me?" -
Don't know? I used to talk about such things with my ex gfs... If they're comfortable enough with it that is?Originally posted by browniebaobao:u dun agree ma?
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Oi, TS!!!
Wer r u!!!??
u get over le ma?
true love is unconditional & blind. -
Ya lo..haha then the guy say dun mind..in the heart..say " wa lao..used product liao...fcuk sia..l hav to reconsider whether l shld MIA or continue be with her"Originally posted by browniebaobao:so honest.
guys that say "dun worry, i dun mind.. i only care about the present etc..."
at the back of their mind, he will remember de lor.
then u see whether he will treat u differently. of course not all, but like TS, he will surely go thru a mental struggle.. if can put it this way..
then one fine day he might ask u "since u did it with ur ex, y not do it with me?"
then u will regret.
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haha no la..was juz joking ard...Originally posted by M©+square:
but seriously..l tink there are sum guys who will tink like that de....
Act as if nice nice...say nvm..but in his head...he is cursing at his own luck! -
I don't mind there are such people around, in fact. Some of my friends adopt these mindset.Originally posted by xShevchenkox:haha no la..was juz joking ard...
but seriously..l tink there are sum guys who will tink like that de....
Act as if nice nice...say nvm..but in his head...he is cursing at his own luck!
Hopefully this shallow idea will grow out in men's mind. -
True love ain't blind. Infatuation is! But I like the true love being unconditional...Originally posted by Cool-gal:Oi, TS!!!
Wer r u!!!??
u get over le ma?
true love is unconditional & blind.
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Next time they will be thinking how to retain "virginity" even after use.Originally posted by M©+square:I don't mind there are such people around, in fact. Some of my friends adopt these mindset.
Hopefully this shallow idea will grow out in men's mind. -
well.. my exs talked to me over their past sex life also..Originally posted by Devil1976:Don't know? I used to talk about such things with my ex gfs... If they're comfortable enough with it that is?
to me, no hard feelings.. doesnt matter how many times he did.. to wat extent.. they might have worried that i will mind.. and felt relieved that i dun mind at all..
as long as dun tell me the process and how the girl feel..
my first love ever told me over the phone that his first time was given to his second ex.. but not he initiated.. it was the ex that helped herself.. then he continued telling me that many girls told him that they prefer a bf that is not a virgin.. coz he will know how to insert and not hurt the girl..
guess how i reacted? I cried..
then he concluded that i was too innocent.. and asked me to find someone as innocent as me.. -
Do not worry. There is always someone for you. Just dun let him think "some gals prefer their guys NOT virgin" is really the case. Else You can powerbomb him.Originally posted by browniebaobao:well.. my exs talked to me over their past sex life also..
to me, no hard feelings.. doesnt matter how many times he did.. to wat extent.. they might have worried that i will mind.. and felt relieved that i dun mind at all..
as long as dun tell me the process and how the girl feel..
my first love ever told me over the phone that his first time was given to his second ex.. but not he initiated.. it was the ex that helped herself.. then he continued telling me that many girls told him that they prefer a bf that is not a virgin.. coz he will know how to insert and not hurt the girl..
guess how i reacted? I cried..
then he concluded that i was too innocent.. and asked me to find someone as innocent as me.. -
Yes. Been in that situation before.Originally posted by James1:Though I had been with my gf for about 4 months, and I was struggling to forget about her past, she told me that she and her ex had did uncountable times of heavy petting or sex at her place, what I mean uncountable was like 3 to 4 times weekly without failed and you know as a bf of hers, I felt I was having an 2nd hand stuff, you guys get what I mean? How to forgo her history? Had any one of you had the smiliar situation as me? Thanks in advance...
There is a very common phenomenon among all living things that has a penis:
We like to feel that we are the more experienced half of the couple. Not only in the sex department, IÂ’m talking about other things in life as well.
And when it isnÂ’t the case, we kick a fuss over it. You have to admit, you are feeling a little insecure right now.
Be a man of reason.
I rather not call a woman in my life some “stuff”. She is not some commodity that belongs to me.
She is a person. Like you, she has a past. Everybody has a past.
She has emotions and she acted according to how she felt.
If you still want her by your side, you have to care enough to respect the choices she makes in life.
Even when you felt that she made a wrong choice, you keep that opinion to yourself. Because you have to trust that she is capable of learning from her mistakes.
Not doing so is an insult to her character.
Let her actions do the talking while you observe.
Think about it. -
is it because girls mind lesser about sex than guys?? heard so from others.Originally posted by browniebaobao:well.. my exs talked to me over their past sex life also..
to me, no hard feelings.. doesnt matter how many times he did.. to wat extent.. they might have worried that i will mind.. and felt relieved that i dun mind at all..
as long as dun tell me the process and how the girl feel..
my first love ever told me over the phone that his first time was given to his second ex.. but not he initiated.. it was the ex that helped herself.. then he continued telling me that many girls told him that they prefer a bf that is not a virgin.. coz he will know how to insert and not hurt the girl..
guess how i reacted? I cried..
then he concluded that i was too innocent.. and asked me to find someone as innocent as me.. -
And you chose to listen to it, didn't you?Originally posted by browniebaobao:well.. my exs talked to me over their past sex life also..
to me, no hard feelings.. doesnt matter how many times he did.. to wat extent.. they might have worried that i will mind.. and felt relieved that i dun mind at all..
as long as dun tell me the process and how the girl feel..
my first love ever told me over the phone that his first time was given to his second ex.. but not he initiated.. it was the ex that helped herself.. then he continued telling me that many girls told him that they prefer a bf that is not a virgin.. coz he will know how to insert and not hurt the girl..
guess how i reacted? I cried..
then he concluded that i was too innocent.. and asked me to find someone as innocent as me.. -
Originally posted by browniebaobao:well.. my exs talked to me over their past sex life also..
to me, no hard feelings.. doesnt matter how many times he did.. to wat extent.. they might have worried that i will mind.. and felt relieved that i dun mind at all..
as long as dun tell me the process and how the girl feel..
my first love ever told me over the phone that his first time was given to his second ex.. but not he initiated.. it was the ex that helped herself.. then he continued telling me that many girls told him that they prefer a bf that is not a virgin.. coz he will know how to insert and not hurt the girl..
guess how i reacted? I cried..
then he concluded that i was too innocent.. and asked me to find someone as innocent as me.. So are you still as innocent as before...?? 
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[quote]Originally posted by Devil1976: So are you still as innocent as before...?? "[/quote
Innocent until proven guilty!
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i am exactly in the same situation as you.Originally posted by James1:Though I had been with my gf for about 4 months, and I was struggling to forget about her past, she told me that she and her ex had did uncountable times of heavy petting or sex at her place, what I mean uncountable was like 3 to 4 times weekly without failed and you know as a bf of hers, I felt I was having an 2nd hand stuff, you guys get what I mean? How to forgo her history? Had any one of you had the smiliar situation as me? Thanks in advance...
i guess it is all in the mindset of oneself.
as for this one, i find it very hard to trust her after what she told me.
but in the end, its how you feel that matters.
if you really love her, i don't think you would mind.
as for this one, i am battling myself everyday.
sometimes, i really drive myself nuts.
hopefully, you will be better than me.
all the best dude. -
Be careful ... Do not be swayed by the people telling you what to do here. Only you yourself know whether you truly mind your GF's past or not. Abstaining from sex till marriage is a value and a personal choice. Being "easy" and casual on sex is a personal choice. Valuing virginity is also a personal choice... Its hard to say who's personal choice is correct and whose is wrong.Originally posted by James1:Though I had been with my gf for about 4 months, and I was struggling to forget about her past, she told me that she and her ex had did uncountable times of heavy petting or sex at her place, what I mean uncountable was like 3 to 4 times weekly without failed and you know as a bf of hers, I felt I was having an 2nd hand stuff, you guys get what I mean? How to forgo her history? Had any one of you had the smiliar situation as me? Thanks in advance...
It is very clear by you posting here that you do mind alot that your GF is not a virgin. If you get swayed by the people here and proceed with your relationship, your trouble will still not go away, it will probably just be temporarily forced down to fester... only to explode spectacularly one day in future during a lover's squabble, doing irreparable damage to both of you.
In short, only you know best.
For me, I am the old fashion type. I think sex is exclusive and something very special only to be shared with the love of your life. I have had sex with only one woman in my life, my wife... and prior to our marriage, I am very careful reigning in my lust for beautiful woman. The only circumstances underwhich I will accept a non virgin is if the girl is a rape victim. -
u mean finding an innocent bf?Originally posted by M©+square:And you chose to listen to it, didn't you?
no i din..
the next one was a beast. -
for me to know, for you not to find out.Originally posted by Devil1976: So are you still as innocent as before...?? "
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What sort of 'beast'?Originally posted by browniebaobao:u mean finding an innocent bf?
no i din..
the next one was a beast. -
I'm sorry for the late reply, as I was in camp from mon - fri and thus I got only this time to reply you all. Firstly thanks for the scolding, it did wake up to my senses a little and some of you eventually ask am I first hand or not? Yes, I am. She is my 2nd girl, the 1st wan was from online so we don't meet up often, and I had never experience sex before, to worsen the circumstances, people often say sex is enjoyable and distress effectively from stress. Upon viewing censor scene from particular drama/movies, my mind often flash back the memory of her being touch, penetrate, blow job, moaning, finger...
You told me love her and accept for who she is, I tried my utmost but still no effect. -
errm...can you recommend the drama/movie you watched?Originally posted by James1:I'm sorry for the late reply, as I was in camp from mon - fri and thus I got only this time to reply you all. Firstly thanks for the scolding, it did wake up to my senses a little and some of you eventually ask am I first hand or not? Yes, I am. She is my 2nd girl, the 1st wan was from online so we don't meet up often, and I had never experience sex before, to worsen the circumstances, people often say sex is enjoyable and distress effectively from stress. Upon viewing censor scene from particular drama/movies, my mind often flash back the memory of her being touch, penetrate, blow job, moaning, finger...
You told me love her and accept for who she is, I tried my utmost but still no effect. -
devil....let me tell u...is a sex beastOriginally posted by Devil1976:What sort of 'beast'? -
ya james...this is normal..dun worry...look at sum forumities here...they too cnt accept a gal that has sex before...is alrite...no1 is gonna force u or wad...Originally posted by James1:I'm sorry for the late reply, as I was in camp from mon - fri and thus I got only this time to reply you all. Firstly thanks for the scolding, it did wake up to my senses a little and some of you eventually ask am I first hand or not? Yes, I am. She is my 2nd girl, the 1st wan was from online so we don't meet up often, and I had never experience sex before, to worsen the circumstances, people often say sex is enjoyable and distress effectively from stress. Upon viewing censor scene from particular drama/movies, my mind often flash back the memory of her being touch, penetrate, blow job, moaning, finger...
You told me love her and accept for who she is, I tried my utmost but still no effect.
but from wad u write...l could see the decision of urs clearly le.. ^^, rather than u saying u dun noe which is more worst bah..
ya..tinking back all those sex scenes with her ex bf is indeed a stressing issue...l agree