Would you love someone poor in Singapore?
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You know, I am rather offended by your first statement. Contrary to what you think, LUST is the reason for teenagers to have sex. Love's got nothing to do with it.Originally posted by love?:Love is a just a reason for teenagers to have sex. Hehe sorry for the frank statement but when you have seen the realities of life, it's harsh. No money will lead to a lot of problems when married even though the beginning is beautiful. I looking for someone I can love and live in for a long long time and hopefully forever.
With a mindset like that, the solution is very simple: go find a millionaire's daughter and marry her.
I also totally disagree with your statment that "No money will lead to a lot of problems when married even though the beginning is beautiful. " The truth of the matter is: problems exist, money or no money, just different sets of problems.
You seem to think that having money is the only way to solve marital problems.... didn't you read about the rich divorcing, or having extramarital affairs etc.
You know what? With your current state of mind, don't get involved with anyone, it's going to destroy you and ruin someone's future.
Go play with yourself, it's free! -
That is a fact for sure.Originally posted by trendz:Let's turn the situation the other way round.
Let's face it; girls do not like poor men. Definitely not.
Why date a guy with no car when you can date a guy with a car?There is no romance in taking taxi or bus after the first few dates.Its only romantic in movies and where there is winter not when the weather is freaking hot!
Love and romance aside, in a way everything starts as an interview. You make a date with the girl for the first time, its an interview both ways. The better you are qualified the better chance you have of going to the next level
Lets be practical , after all we are in singapore.
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[quote]Originally posted by Chin Eng:
You know, I am rather offended by your first statement. Contrary to what you think, LUST is the reason for teenagers to have sex. Love's got nothing to do with it.
With a mindset like that, the solution is very simple: go find a millionaire's daughter and marry her.
I also totally disagree with your statment that "No money will lead to a lot of problems when married even though the beginning is beautiful. " The truth of the matter is: problems exist, money or no money, just different sets of problems.
You seem to think that having money is the only way to solve marital problems.... didn't you read about the rich divorcing, or having extramarital affairs etc.
You know what? With your current state of mind, don't get involved with anyone, it's going to destroy you and ruin someone's future.
Go play with yourself, it's free
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If you're a smart guy, look for an educated or a well-to-do wife....
If you're a smart girl, look for an educated or well-to-do husband....
BUT... Love is blind... oh well... -
No, I the beGGarchiEfOriginally posted by Ito_^:are u dokono?
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Precisely! Bread!Originally posted by darknessfall:love or bread
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I am overwhelmed by the swamp of responses with equal camps on both side. Well in life, choices have to be made but in the name of love, I decided to just do it. It's better to have loved and be loved than never. No one knows the future and if everything needs to be perfect, it's boring.
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That's a noob way of looking at things.Originally posted by love?:I am a guy. It's a fact that living in Singapore is a very tough one if there isn't enough money to go by. What happens if in the choice of a partner, there appears to be many however the dilemmna is who to choose? Someone you love or someone whom you can foresee to have a future with espcially in the area of finances.
I am hesitating to go after someone I like the reason being she's not well-educated. I know many of you will say to go after love but what happens 10 or 20 years down the road when the realities of life steps in. It's tough even for a guy to support a family all by himself here in Singapore. I am talking about the average family here.
What would you do if you are just an average guy and you this choice presents itself to you. Should I wait for a better one or should I go for it?
Why not think of working even harder such that you can be with her? -
good. now you can proceed to remove that question mark from your name.Originally posted by love?:I am overwhelmed by the swamp of responses with equal camps on both side. Well in life, choices have to be made but in the name of love, I decided to just do it. It's better to have loved and be loved than never. No one knows the future and if everything needs to be perfect, it's boring.
take care -
With the convoluted thinking and flippancy you have displayed in this thread, my opinion is that you have no idea what love is. Please stay the heck away from that girl. For her sake and yours. Please. You are not in love, you are probably in love with the idea of being in love.Originally posted by love?:I am overwhelmed by the swamp of responses with equal camps on both side. Well in life, choices have to be made but in the name of love, I decided to just do it. It's better to have loved and be loved than never. No one knows the future and if everything needs to be perfect, it's boring. -
Originally posted by love?:
please lar, just leave the girl alone, she deserves someone better who will cherish her for who and what she is..
I am overwhelmed by the swamp of responses with equal camps on both side. Well in life, choices have to be made [b]but in the name of love, I decided to just do it. It's better to have loved and be loved than never. No one knows the future and if everything needs to be perfect, it's boring.[/b]
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Yes I would love somebody poorer than me in Singapore. Basically, they won't add extra pressure to your already heavy baggage ( if you happened to have one ).
As a guy, I feel that I should bring home the bread. If my bread is relatively smaller in size to my partner, problems will always seep into the relationship. Its called reality. When reality really sets in .... you will get to see the both of you in a place called family court getting a divorce.
Trust me, no matter how sweet and loving and caring your partner might be, if she brings home a larger piece of the bread, you better be great in bed.
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I jus go for someone richer than me. fullstop.
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They ain't happy becos of the lifestye style they want. If u ain't choosy abt lifestyle, love will work it out for u!Originally posted by love?:Some things in life are foreseeable and not as rosy as what inspiration gurus says. I have seen a few guys going down this path and they ain't happy when the honeymoon ended. -
U'll have to decide if that risk is worth taking.. when it comes to choosing between head and heart, no one has a clearer picture of the situation than yourself
It's best not to be too calculative about love.. it's not predictable. who knows, she may very well appreciate your sacrifice and turn out to be your pillar of support who will catch you when you fall. -
I fully agree with the sentence in red. In fact, rich people (especially those who did not make their own money, or in showbiz) are less likely to stick together than poorer people. Money, or the lack of it, can be a blessing or a curse... it highly depends on the individual.Originally posted by Chin Eng:You know, I am rather offended by your first statement. Contrary to what you think, LUST is the reason for teenagers to have sex. Love's got nothing to do with it.
With a mindset like that, the solution is very simple: go find a millionaire's daughter and marry her.
I also totally disagree with your statment that "No money will lead to a lot of problems when married even though the beginning is beautiful. " The truth of the matter is: problems exist, money or no money, just different sets of problems.
You seem to think that having money is the only way to solve marital problems.... didn't you read about the rich divorcing, or having extramarital affairs etc.
You know what? With your current state of mind, don't get involved with anyone, it's going to destroy you and ruin someone's future. -
Poverty is definitely a curse.Originally posted by spinsugar:I fully agree with the sentence in red. In fact, rich people (especially those who did not make their own money, or in showbiz) are less likely to stick together than poorer people. Money, or the lack of it, can be a blessing or a curse... it highly depends on the individual. -
one very sure way of knowing whether she will be a good and capable mother is how she treats her pets, if any. 95% confirmed.
if she no pets, not even a goldfish, then just see how she treats surrounding animals, also strays, and neighbours pets in general then. pigeons not included.
PS: Treats does not mean saying: cute! or such other language. it mean physical treatment or contact. but the no pets thing is still in experimental stage, so nowhere certain. -
Now, I'm not trying to make a senseless defence for the threadstarter, but I think you fail to see the point. Your hypothetical argument doesn't hold IMO. While your claims are not entirely unimaginable or impossible, the probability of things turning out that way is just more remote. Afterall, there're tonnes of ways to become a millionaire, but I guess it's equally fair to say more millionaires succeeded through other means than those who did through winning the lottery?Originally posted by 4getmenot:Not trying to be critical here.. but you can't forsee whats gonna happen in 5 years down the road not to mention 10-20 yrs.. hell she might end up more successful than you probably are. If you are so worried bout supporting your family all by yourself, you could strive and work harder now so u might eventually be able to provide for your family all by yourself without your wife working at all.
Wait for a better one? or go for it? hell i dun even know what you mean by that?
Assuming we accept the threadstarter views his spouse being well-educated as being important(I mean he's entitled to his views obviously, however unreasonable it might seem to the rest of us) in terms of being able to provide for their common future, I can hardly fault him for wanting a better educated girl. Just think about it : who would be able to provide greater financial stability in a long term relationship (at least, he's frank enough on his part to admit he doesn't deem it feasible to support a family on his own in the long term and doesn't start a relationship irresponsibly without thinking about the practical issues which are bound to afflict them later on) - a girl with low education and a potential low-income job or a well-educated one with a better income? At the end of the day, oftentimes life(and decisions made accordingly) is a matter of probability, isn't it?
PS : How little education would constitute "low" to threadstarter is another matter. -
errrmmmm...
Got a g/f, with O levels. worked as a clerk most time.
her parents introduced her a lorry driver guy which they liked.
Both parents are poor and retired. She was the sole breadwinner.
She married that guy, had 2 kids with that guy and is now a housewife for the last 7 years.
They are poor, they only have S$2000/- per month family income to feed the family and both their aged parents.
what might not work for you, might have worked for others. -
i can oly tell u dis - blame urself fer being useless.
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Originally posted by love?:
I am overwhelmed by the swamp of responses with equal camps on both side. Well in life, choices have to be made but in the name of love, I decided to just do it. It's better to have loved and be loved than never. No one knows the future and if everything needs to be perfect, it's boring.
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I agree with AVOriginally posted by av98m:With the convoluted thinking and flippancy you have displayed in this thread, my opinion is that you have no idea what love is. Please stay the heck away from that girl. For her sake and yours. Please. You are not in love, you are probably in love with the idea of being in love.
I hate to say this but you are a real disgrace to SG Men
I hope the girl doesn't like you or respond to your wooing because from what you have been writing you have been totally flippant and your irresponsible attitude is appalling.
I can only forsee you bailing out once the relationship runs into a problem or if she has any problems. -
He's a bit lacking in confidence right now and is unsure whether he has the ability to support a family all by himself in time to come.I agree with AV
I hate to say this but you are a real disgrace to SG Men
I hope the girl doesn't like you or respond to your wooing because from what you have been writing you have been totally flippant and your irresponsible attitude is appalling.
I can only forsee you bailing out once the relationship runs into a problem or if she has any problems.
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In defence of the threadstarter, if he has a flippant and irresponsible attitude, he would not have bothered to write and ask for help.If sex is the only thing he wants, he would have just went for it.
He wrote this,
[quote]but what happens 10 or 20 years down the road when the realities of life steps in. It's tough even for a guy to support a family all by himself here in Singapore. I am talking about the average family here.
]What would you do if you are just an average guy and you this choice presents itself to you. Should I wait for a better one or should I go for it?
He's someone who is trying to plan his future and have a blissful marriage.
How is that irresponsible?
I don't think he deserves what you threw at him.