quality of mods III
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I am not really sure if you'd read or understood what I'd said... for some strange reason, I think VK may understand more about what I had shared.Originally posted by jojobeach:Dear Chin Eng,
When you are given a charge whom has been molested by someone she trust. Do you tell her " girl you have to take responsibility for your perpertrator's action" ???? What kind of logic is that ??
Do you also tell her " Let's not make a big hoo haa outa it, because it ain't a big deal" What kind of counsellor is that ????
You might as well feed that poor girl to the sharks.
No where did you read that Chin Eng said, "that let's not a big deal of it", neither did I say that we should not persecuted the perpertrator for what's it's worth...
I am saying that in every issue there are some background things that we need to consider. Let me PM you on those points before the flaming starts again, and the poor victim is agonised all over one more time.
Cheers. -
So many of the people here participated in silencing alexrain and me. Yes, silence us, and now there is a new girl who falls prey into the ‘well-respected’ mod.
http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=240688&page=29
It has gotten from bad to worse. Last time he asked me to break off with my bf so as to promote himself despite he had a gf. Now he has taken a step forward to touch the girl. What is next? Do you people want to see more disastrous scenarios? More victims?
Like I said, those who suppressed the truth the last round, you know who you are. You know you got blood in your hands for this case. Do you want to continue suppressing the truth and thereby causing more victims get molested? Or worse things to come, since he can get away scot free now, wouldnÂ’t that boost his guts? Like your suppression of the truth in the past had boosted his guts and making the current saga possible? -
I empathise with your predicament.....
My comments on the issue of devil remains solely on ONE case. I am not aware of what you have gone through as I was not following your case.
There is no need to silent to perpertrator.... if you feel that you have been violated, you ought to go to the relevant authorities, seeing that there is another case to back you up.
... the sad issue of all these happenings is really how we conduct ourselves on the internet.
... to all those who think the cyberworld is safe, think again. Never meet anyone you don't know personally, or at least with some of your personal friends. -
i dun agree wif this sentence. i feel every gals should be on guard of every guys inregardless of pple they know or not (except for husband, father or brothers maybe). statistics have shown dat most victims kena from pple they know.Originally posted by Chin Eng:I empathise with your predicament.....
My comments on the issue of devil remains solely on ONE case. I am not aware of what you have gone through as I was not following your case.
There is no need to silent to perpertrator.... if you feel that you have been violated, you ought to go to the relevant authorities, seeing that there is another case to back you up.
... the sad issue of all these happenings is really how we conduct ourselves on the internet.
... to all those who think the cyberworld is safe, think again. Never meet anyone you don't know personally, or at least with some of your personal friends. -
Thank you for your empathy. Fortunately for me, no real harm suffered. I am not a young naive girl afterall. i managed to leave that saga unscathed. but i do hope no girls will fall prey, hence my coming forward to speak up.Originally posted by Chin Eng:I empathise with your predicament.....
My comments on the issue of devil remains solely on ONE case. I am not aware of what you have gone through as I was not following your case.
There is no need to silent to perpertrator.... if you feel that you have been violated, you ought to go to the relevant authorities, seeing that there is another case to back you up.
... the sad issue of all these happenings is really how we conduct ourselves on the internet.
... to all those who think the cyberworld is safe, think again. Never meet anyone you don't know personally, or at least with some of your personal friends. -
Dear Chin Eng,Originally posted by Chin Eng:I empathise with your predicament.....
My comments on the issue of devil remains solely on ONE case. I am not aware of what you have gone through as I was not following your case.
There is no need to silent to perpertrator.... if you feel that you have been violated, you ought to go to the relevant authorities, seeing that there is another case to back you up.
... the sad issue of all these happenings is really how we conduct ourselves on the internet.
... to all those who think the cyberworld is safe, think again. Never meet anyone you don't know personally, or at least with some of your personal friends.
I have my doubts but now I am more curious.
You do have an air of naivety to your replies.
What makes you think the people you meet in real life is any more "safe" than people you meet on-line ?? Do you really think the "real life" encounters will not lie, will not cheat, will not molest ????
A criminal will be a criminal irregardless of online or real life.
Just because that person is a friend of your friend does not mean he is not a hypocrite either. -
i think he meant if going out with anybody u dun really noe.. go in groups. or someone u trust..Originally posted by jojobeach:Dear Chin Eng,
I have my doubts but now I am more curious.
You do have an air of naivety to your replies.
What makes you think the people you meet in real life is any more "safe" than people you meet on-line ?? Do you really think the "real life" encounters will not lie, will not cheat, will not molest ????
A criminal will be a criminal irregardless of online or real life.
Just because that person is a friend of your friend does not mean he is not a hypocrite either.
he didn state just online ppl u noe? -
I did not say that people you meet in real life is any safer.Originally posted by jojobeach:Dear Chin Eng,
I have my doubts but now I am more curious.
You do have an air of naivety to your replies.
What makes you think the people you meet in real life is any more "safe" than people you meet on-line ?? Do you really think the "real life" encounters will not lie, will not cheat, will not molest ????
A criminal will be a criminal irregardless of online or real life.
Just because that person is a friend of your friend does not mean he is not a hypocrite either.
I am saying that people in the cyber world do not even have a face.
When you meet people in the real world, you have more opportunities to size them up, by they way they conduct their lifes, the things they talk about day in day out... in the cyber world, it's just this note that I am banging on my keyboard..... so how do you know the real me?
I am sure there are many of you who go out for coffee without any dire consequence.... I am sure the group of nice ladies at the TaiTai's forum go for high tea all the time. No issue.
But.... there are many of us here that are quite young, and WILL fall prey to the predators.... so whose responsibility is it to keep oneself safe? So when we accept invitations to meet up, and we are so naive and go along, without any form of security and get our life messed up, isn't it our own fault too?
Am I still naive? -
exactly!Originally posted by shinta:i think he meant if going out with anybody u dun really noe.. go in groups. or someone u trust..
he didn state just online ppl u noe?
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Hey people,
i agree that a gal gotta be careful whether she is going out with people she knows online or offline. but lets not digress. If you will like to discuss about this topic, can start a thread?
Lets not digress. -
i think that one is common sense.. but then again, back when i was much younger, i didn had any.Originally posted by Chin Eng:exactly!
oh well at least i went to places tt i am very familiar... a shout nia can get frenz to come in 5 min
near my work place -
what topic? devil/quinsy? quality of mod?Originally posted by bee_gal:Hey people,
i agree that a gal gotta be careful whether she is going out with people she knows online or offline. but lets not digress. If you will like to discuss about this topic, can start a thread?
Lets not digress.
may I propose one title: What Is the reponsibility of the MOD of AA? -
I am glad you're wiser now.... unfortuately many young 'uns are not there yet.Originally posted by shinta:i think that one is common sense.. but then again, back when i was much younger, i didn had any.
oh well at least i went to places tt i am very familiar... a shout nia can get frenz to come in 5 min
near my work place
I think the issue is not just girls.... I have two sons, and the rule I have for them on the internet is: never reveal who you are and never meet anyone you got acquainted to in the cyberworld. -
http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=239843&page=0Originally posted by Chin Eng:what topic? devil/quinsy? quality of mod?
may I propose one title: What Is the reponsibility of the MOD of AA? -
topic close already.... and I also think it's different focus.
the close topic discusses the QUALIFICATION of the mods - in itself, is not sustainable.... how to check and how to qualify? if someone more "qualify" comes along, how? and what kind of qualification: psychology? sociology? medical? too broad base lah.
I am proposing on the DUTIES of the mods.... to me, mods need not be qualified counsellors.... mods just need to sweep the dirt and keep the place peaceful.... but this is just my opinion. -
u noe.. if nel thinks tt way.. maybe we might not be together today.. unless our fren decides to introOriginally posted by Chin Eng:I am glad you're wiser now.... unfortuately may young 'uns are not there yet.
I think the issue is not just girls.... I have two sons, and the rule I have for them on the internet is: never reveal who you are and never meet anyone you got acquainted to in the cyberworld.
we happen to noe the same group of ppl.... just not each other.. -
are the moderators here certified.
or they are just any tom dick and harry which thinks they can function as aunt agony who frankly has no experiences or training for counselling?
Or are they moderators here, which frankly, should not be advising people except to try to keep the forum clean and free from abuse? -
And what is abuse?
When they themself are abusing the situations of the forumers? -
Haiz.... This was the exact mentality that Chin Eng and I were talking about. Just because we don't agree with you on one two issues you treat us like your enemy and disagree with us on everything.
Once again, you are getting a lot of thing wrong on many occassions.
That was never what Chin Eng was talking about. To say something like that is tantamount to putting words in other people's mouths. Chin Eng has already clarfied this so I won't go further.Originally posted by jojobeach:Dear Chin Eng,
When you are given a charge whom has been molested by someone she trust. Do you tell her " girl you have to take responsibility for your perpertrator's action" ???? What kind of logic is that ??
Do you also tell her " Let's not make a big hoo haa outa it, because it ain't a big deal" What kind of counsellor is that ????
Where VK is concerned, it has gone beyond that. Action was already taken, VK wanted more.You might as well feed that poor girl to the sharks.[/quote]
Seriously, there were times VK had to be prompted to spare a thought for the victim. Go figure.I have seen too many, infact way too many girls being taken advantage of, and yet they meekly back off into the back ground because of fear, shame, uncertainty. Is that deem acceptable by you ???
That's an assumption by you.Perhaps.. just perhaps have you question this.. if VK did not make a big deal outa it, it would just become another story the society shrugs off so easily.You added the most to it by starting one thread after the other. Moreover, her posts kind of moved away from the actual incident and got very personal and emotional in nature. Something VK has concede as well. It had gotten beyond standing up for the victim to being far more personal.The fact that VK made so much fire outa this is also not entirely her doing. In this case, it takes many hands to raise such an uproar.
There have been other people who have stood up for the victim in this alleged case as well. However, VK's posts and threads are different.Have you ever regretted not standing up and fight after you have been taken advantage of ? I did. And I hated that feeling. The anguish of being weak is unspeakable.Again like I said earlier, support the victim and give courage, yes. Support VK then I'd have to think thrice.And unfortunately, many of us are weak, that's why people comes into our lives to support us and give us courage. So that we can do what we normally wouldn't have the courage to do.
I think a lot of others have shown their support to the victim as well, and there have been times where VK's actions would have made the girl more scared than give her courage.What VK has done is just that, give the girl her courage.Things were being done and already had been done. That is the whole issue here. Action was already taken but VK went on because of personal vendetta.If it takes this much action to get things done, to move things along. Don't you think we need more stronger rower in the boat ??
Different discussion entirely.No doubt it takes two hands to clap. But like I said before, just because you can or have the opportunity to take, does not mean you should.The warning was already given, VK went beyond that. Spare a thought also for the victim. Also, you must consider if VK's numerous threads and posting caused more harm than good. Blowing something big doesn't always mean it's good.For what VK has done, she has indeed shine a very bright light on this Devil.
So let this be a warning to all users in this virtual arena.
[quote]The way I see it, the word to describe her is not emotional, infact, more passionate. A rarity among souless Singaporeans.Overly passionate is the same as being too emotional. Once again, stand up against wrong doing, yes. But to support VK's actions, no.
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Or in some ways.
Abuse with words which they dont dare to be liable for? -
if u want quality or certified advise pls spend some buck and visit yr nearby counsellor ..
as u know this is just a forum .. the mod here are kind enough to help out and give free advise ..
good thing dont come cheap .. cheap thing dont come good .. so .. live it or be it
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[ur]http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=184838[/url]
read this. I must say, I am willing to throw this back to Devil, in his face, to ask him what has he done then, when people online here geniuniely here for help, and his objections to offered help by stopping others to render help.
he claims politics and hidden agenda. but does he mirrors his own? -
maybe, but are you so sure you are getting it right?Originally posted by SumOne:Haiz.... This was the exact mentality that Chin Eng and I were talking about. Just because we don't agree with you on one two issues you treat us like your enemy and disagree with us on everything.
Once again, you are getting a lot of thing wrong on many occassions.
whats makes you so sure that someone is targetting you on those comments?
For all you know, the person you quoted, arent even referring to you.
Arent you being personal where it was a general discussion not to you?
Did you think about what you typed against yourself? -
there you go....Originally posted by meltz:if u want quality or certified advise pls spend some buck and visit yr nearby counsellor ..
as u know this is just a forum .. the mod here are kind enough to help out and give free advise ..
good thing dont come cheap .. cheap thing dont come good .. so .. live it or be it
more people to add to the flame.
So is everyone raring to go again for another round? -
Did anyone asked you to support?Originally posted by SumOne:Overly passionate is the same as being too emotional. Once again, stand up against wrong doing, yes. But to support VK's actions, no.