I Can't Live With This Guilt Anymore!
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That day you drank too much alcoholic drink, that's why you can't think properly.
Alcohol and Psychology
To understand what had happened, you must first understand the basic effects on alcohol.
Basically there are afew states which you can reach based on different level of alcohol in blood concentration. Euphoria, Lethargy, Confusion, Stupor, Coma, Death.
Based on what you've said, I infer that your alcohol level in blood is quite high. Based on what you've said, you seems to be fall on the state of confusion.
The state of confusion incoporate these 3 general characteristic.
1. Profound confusion — uncertain where they are or what they are doing. Dizziness and staggering occur.
2. Heightened emotional state — aggressive, withdrawn, or overly affectionate. Vision, speech, and awareness are impaired.
3. Poor coordination and pain response. Nausea and vomiting often occur.
The high concentration of alcohol is your blood cause you to have hightened emotional state, like overly affectionate. Of course you know what you are doing at that point of time.
See, just the effect of alcohol is enough to cause a lot of trouble.
Next is psychology.
Psychology also plays a major role in this unfortunate event. Your emotional state at that day was Anger, Happy, Disappoint and Sad. It all stated at the shop when your Mother-In-Law opposed your decision. It's made worst when your future husband shouted at you infront of so many people. By then, you are experiencing an overflow of emotional signals.
You are very very unhappy at that time, and naturally you need to confide to someone. You poured out all your feelings to your manager, and that when you feel alittle better.
Because you wanted to forget all the unhappy things, you subconsciously wanted to drown your sorrow with alcohol. And the more you drink the more you feel better, but that's temporarily. Soon you lose your ability to think.
These are the two major factor that contributes to what happened that day.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Effects_of_alcohol_on_the_body#Effects_by_dose
Analysing the manager
And this so called 'nice and helpful' is actually a wolf in sheep's clothing. He told advantage of you when you are drunk and couldn't think properly at that time. He know that when you are drunk, your psychological defence at that point is the weakest. That's why he got himself a golden chance to ahem you.
This kind of person is definitely a hypocrite. He said that he will take responsibility of what had happened, I believe this is untrue and bull5hit. Imagine if he can be so unfaithful to his current family, I guess his integrity are highly questionable.
If he is a genuinely good person, he will definitely reject the sex and other actions as well. He is capitalizing the from the fact that your are unable to think critically and incoherent.
A fact IS a fact
Since this has already happened, I think we should not dwell in the past. Now the most important thing is to devise a solution to this problem. I have to leave this for you.
Death is not the best solution always. Some may say that Death is a solution to solve all problems, but I have to disagree with this. Imagine what happened when you committed suicide. Your families and friends will be very sad! Other things might also happen, too many things you know.
Although I doesn't know what's your religion, but I believe almost all religioin have a chapter regarding about death and sucide.
Lesson learnt
After this incident, I am sure you've learnt many precious lesson in life. Remember, you must learnt from your lesson and never never make the same mistake again next time.
Present
What's most important now is afew urgent issues. To check whether you are pregnant or not, go to see a gynecologist. Don't rely on those test kit, because they are not 100% accurate.
Then you should go to hospital to check for Sexually Transmitted Dieseas and HIVs. You'll never know what disease that old man got in him. -
thats cause you're obsessed with keii looking better then you.Originally posted by boka:generally are but idealogist and prideful individual like me never fallen prey.
i can judge, yes i can.
i am not biased against you, am juding purely from an independent view too so i have in no way violated any morals or justice when making this judgement. -
i never said that i am mature wah, i just have a quick mouth -_-* if i have offend you in any way, sorry. never meant to....Originally posted by blu_sky:haha! you think i will bother about what a person who is as naive and childish as to "
wants to be king and dethrone FI" think? Talking about childishness and naivety!
just that, TS is really ignorant, and i really feel like spamming wall of text and ask her to wake up from her little lalalalal idea,
oh ya, a darn sad sobbing story, yawn~~~ s h i t happens in AA all the time
bleh -
Pity for?Originally posted by allentyb:i will reserve my opinion on TS, and i am not going to be harsh on my comment on this thread, i still think blu_sky, you are too naive, and there is no benefit of doubt here, it is very crystal clear of what have happen so far, and you lack of the ability to comprehend this matter,
TS shouldn't have accepted the diamond necklace at all, shouldn't she have think of what is the manager intention, and since she should have avoid him, why did she has to call him up? and isn't there anybody that she can call up to pours her woes to?
and seriously, i think TS is a terrible mood, i shalt not provoke her at all, she very well, knows that manager likes her, and since he is available that times, oh well, things have happen, and now she is escaping from reality, you are just another girl, that i have seen, tsk tsk, i pity singaporean woman
They have themselve to blame for being Material driven.
Gotta go orch libary,talk to ya there on my notebook. -
i <3 stellazio, MARRY ME. *buy a tiffany ring for you*
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but wasn't it also humans who made laws?Originally posted by boka:Law are above all but humans have meddle with the laws to suit the needs of their people and land,thus making it fallible. -
BTW TS posted that she did not accept the diamond necklace. It is on the first page
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the fact is, she slept him already wahOriginally posted by elindra:BTW TS posted that she did not accept the diamond necklace. It is on the first page -
keii is not better looking than me.Originally posted by stellazio:thats cause you're obsessed with keii looking better then you.
i can judge, yes i can.
i am not biased against you, am juding purely from an independent view too so i have in no way violated any morals or justice when making this judgement.
I can have the pics posted up again to allow a larger readers to judge. -
i was posting that in the context of replying GoodBook.Originally posted by allentyb:i will reserve my opinion on TS, and i am not going to be harsh on my comment on this thread, i still think blu_sky, you are too naive, and there is no benefit of doubt here, it is very crystal clear of what have happen so far, and you lack of the ability to comprehend this matter,
TS shouldn't have accepted the diamond necklace at all, shouldn't she have think of what is the manager intention, and since she should have avoid him, why did she has to call him up? and isn't there anybody that she can call up to pours her woes to?
and seriously, i think TS is a terrible mood, i shalt not provoke her at all, she very well, knows that manager likes her, and since he is available that times, oh well, things have happen, and now she is escaping from reality, you are just another girl, that i have seen, tsk tsk, i pity singaporean woman
Learn to understand what is going on before bashing someone, else you look like a fool for bashing wrong people. -
blu sky..thanks for your message..i agree with you..i have been asking myself this question for the past month...why did i mistake my manager for my bf? or was it just my own thoughts to make myself less guilty? or was it bcos i was in an emotional state? or was it bcos of???? i really cant answer it.......Originally posted by blu_sky:I believe many people have been drunk before. But i have not heard of anyone getting drunk and mistake one person for another. Honestly, thought that only happens in the tv?
And, I think someone who take so much discipline to preserve her virginity wouldnt give it away so easily too.
Thirdly, TS's engish is really pretty gd for a cosmetic promoter i think.
Last but not least, a manager giving out diamond necklace to express love in this age. hmmm.... quite rare too. i dont think retail floor manager who manages promoters earn a lot.
Well, since this is AA, lets just give TS the benefit of the doubts?
maybe i should just reach this answer...that i am materialistic...and that i did it bcos i want his money......even though i know i will never accept him..nor start a relationship with him even if my bf leaves me......i really should just say that maybe at that moment..i was thinking of his money...i am just a shameless bitch...it doesnt matter anymore...i will tell my bf the truth...
To both me and my bf...virginity is something sacred...something to give to someone whom we are committed to spend the rest of our lives with..i know there are ways to repair hymen etc.....however it is not like this to us..i know some don't think much about abstaining from pre marital sex....but to us...it was something important...and it isnt hard for me to refrain from pre-marital sex..cos he has never asked me to have pre-marital sex nor anything else rather than kissing before marriage..it is our beliefs....but i know i have broken it.......and there's really no excuses for me...
I actually love academic life...in fact for my 'o' level, i obtained 8 pts for best 5 subjects..and 11 pts for best 6..but due to some personal family problems..i have no choice but to quit after my 'o' levels..i dun wish to say it further here...my only other regret is that i am not able to fulfill my ambition to further my studies....
personally..i do not know how much he earns....nor whether he can afford a diamond necklace..i don't ask my manager such personal questions...but at the end of the day..i didnt accept it...cos i know where my heart is....but contradictory to what i said here....i ended up doing such a thing to my bf in the end....i got no one to blame but myself.... -
then show it la...Originally posted by boka:keii is not better looking than me.
I can have the pics posted up again to allow a larger readers to judge.
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No,Laws exist just naturally.Originally posted by stellazio:but wasn't it also humans who made laws?
If it did not,how did man come to a conclusion as to what is right and wrong even without the laws?
we can remove all jurisdition but inside us,we know what's black and white. -
dude, who are you to judge who looks better when you're in the case itself?Originally posted by boka:keii is not better looking than me.
I can have the pics posted up again to allow a larger readers to judge.
can the plaintiff pass the judgement on the defendant?
nope, its for the judge to decide, and that is the independent 3rd parties. admit it. you're probably better looking then lotsa other people, but just not keii. -
i already said that i am sorry..... woman are really petty creatures -_-Originally posted by blu_sky:i was posting that in the context of replying GoodBook.
Learn to understand what is going on before bashing someone, else you look like a fool for bashing wrong people. -
yes, you do have a quick mouth. for the record, i never meant to bash TS in any way. Yes sh1t happens. And everyone makes mistakes, me too. So, no one deserves to be bashed untill he is incorrigible.Originally posted by allentyb:i never said that i am mature wah, i just have a quick mouth -_-* if i have offend you in any way, sorry. never meant to....
just that, TS is really ignorant, and i really feel like spamming wall of text and ask her to wake up from her little lalalalal idea,
oh ya, a darn sad sobbing story, yawn~~~ s h i t happens in AA all the time
bleh
Peace -
eh... i posted that before i saw your sori lah.Originally posted by allentyb:i already said that i am sorry..... woman are really petty creatures -_-
Mr Quick Mouth, learn to hold your tongue for a moment before bashing the next person who comes along leh. if after 3 min, you still think that person worhth scolding, ok lah, go ahead. -
Just clarifying about her accepting the necklaceOriginally posted by allentyb:the fact is, she slept him already wah
I'm not saying she didn't sleep with him
Anyway I think TS knows what to do -
guys.. offer advice, a shoulder to cry on.. stick to the topic?
and for those you think are trolls, remember the golden rule in the internet..
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dun tell ur bf the truth if u love him... he cannot tahan one if he tinks this way...Originally posted by Crystal_Gal:To both me and my bf...virginity is something sacred...something to give to someone whom we are committed to spend the rest of our lives with..
u felt better aft telling him... how abt him? -
removedOriginally posted by Cool-gal:then show it la... -
keii is so handsome...
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blah blah bleh sheep.... you are full of crap, now then you regret what have happens, to err is human, you are just the kind of woman, i seen all the time, TS,
To pity you, will be, a disgrace to my fellow man kind, and seriously, i hope you will reflect on your own sorry soul for what you have done, like i said, men are cheap, they might just forgive you of what you have done, if pride gets in the way of your boyfriend, you might very well, get your way, which is leave him
you do know you are at fault, and your darn fate depends on what your boyfriend have to say.
i have in no position to judge,i don't know you at all, i am not going to name calling, which i very much want to do so, but i will refrain from doing so. -
He got a quick mouth to point out the wrongs.Originally posted by blu_sky:eh... i posted that before i saw your sori lah.
Mr Quick Mouth, learn to hold your tongue for a moment before bashing the next person who comes along leh. if after 3 min, you still think that person worhth scolding, ok lah, go ahead.
What do u have against that? -
Seriously, if you want to try to stroke your own ego, start a new thread instead of hijacking TS thread to feed the narcissistic troll in you.Originally posted by boka:keii is not better looking than me.
I can have the pics posted up again to allow a larger readers to judge.
Anyway, does it matter what others say because in your own delusional mind, you are better looking then Keii