Will you accept your gf who had abortion before?

• Aaron8209

  27 Sep 07, 21:31

  
• kktrader

  28 Sep 07, 01:20

  Its a shame when you are separated so far from each other. But as a friend used to always tell me, Love knows no distance. If you truly Love your the person. Then you'll find a way to be together forever.
  
  Best of luck.
• y33bas

  28 Sep 07, 09:20

  have you met the girl before?
  if you haven't...meeting her might be another realm to deal with.
  the abortion thing is a warning for you that if you were to proceed further into the relationship, do not fail her.
  if you and her got together and accept her past, go ahead.
  love should not be selfish for oneself.
  extend yourself to her and put yourself in her shoes. how would she feel?
  i think she is very brave to bring that up to you so early.
  she must be debating it herself and maybe with her friends.
  if you do accept her..she will treasure you for many are selfish lovers.
  
  i think...go ahead! love her and embrace her...
• kiss_my (_i_)

  28 Sep 07, 09:24

  mostly those with relationship are not virgin. (no 1 is virgin nowaday..)
  
  no one is perfect..
  
  just go ahead and love her..
  
  sometiem it is courage to keep in touch with ex..
  i salute tht..
  
  and maybe u just jealous tht she still contacting her ex..
  
  is normal..
• angel7030

  28 Sep 07, 11:26

  Originally posted by kiss_my (_i_):
  [b]no 1 is virgin nowaday..
  
  no one is perfect..
  
  just go ahead and love her..
  
  sometiem it is courage to keep in touch with ex..
  i salute tht..
  
  and maybe u just jealous tht she still contacting her ex..
  
  is normal..[/b]

  Objection!!! I am still virgin ok. Never study properly anyhow post, how can??
  
  Sue you.
• CPTMiller

  28 Sep 07, 13:40

  I think the thread starter is lost emotionally. He might not really understand what is love.
  We cant really give comments base on his short posting.
  If the thread starter love this woman (no matter wihat nationality).
  He should find out the truth why the exguy still contact her or the other way round.
  Only then the thread starter can manage a this relationship.
  It is not about accepting a girl with pregnant experience etc.
  
  As for your point stating that man is always a player and girls in the end get hurt more eg with baby etc.
  I think some guys are better then the others.
  Both gender have black sheep.
  
  I wish you happy always.
  
  

  Originally posted by angel7030:

  This is a typical gender discrimination question. It is we as gal that alway end up being the outcast one. Men can hv all the sex they wanted and enjoyed lavishly, beside contracting HIV, they got nothing to worry about, yet innocent young gals like us hv to worry about pregnancy and also HIV and also bf left us with a baby. Please lah, guys hv some responsibility.
  
  So, can i say ask you in reverse, Will you accept a bf who had many sexual intercourse with other gal before?
  

• de_middle

  28 Sep 07, 13:42

  Originally posted by angel7030:

  Objection!!! I am still virgin ok. Never study properly anyhow post, how can??
  
  Sue you.

  over-ruled
• CPTMiller

  28 Sep 07, 13:44

  Cant be.
  You joker
  
  

  Originally posted by kiss_my (_i_):

  no 1 is virgin nowaday..
  
  no one is perfect..
  
  just go ahead and love her..
  
  sometiem it is courage to keep in touch with ex..
  i salute tht..
  
  and maybe u just jealous tht she still contacting her ex..
  
  is normal..

• seotiblizzard

  28 Sep 07, 15:47

  i dun mind gals who had abortion before.
  i just dun like when they lie.
• oOprinceOo

  28 Sep 07, 17:34

  Originally posted by seotiblizzard:

  i dun mind gals who had abortion before.
  i just dun like when they lie.

  sure boh.
• dreamykite

  28 Sep 07, 18:19

  If you find it stress for such issue, just tell her you prefer her as a friend. It is easier to know a person via friendship. Stop talking about 'I love her..., she loves me', that sort of childish thinking when you don't even know what is love. You do not have to commit yourself that fast, give yourself air to breathe. Try not to get addicted into contacting her via webcam, take a few days of break by not contacting her.
  
  
• angel7030

  28 Sep 07, 18:46

  Originally posted by CPTMiller:

  I think the thread starter is lost emotionally. He might not really understand what is love.
  We cant really give comments base on his short posting.
  If the thread starter love this woman (no matter wihat nationality).
  He should find out the truth why the exguy still contact her or the other way round.
  Only then the thread starter can manage a this relationship.
  It is not about accepting a girl with pregnant experience etc.
  
  As for your point stating that man is always a player and girls in the end get hurt more eg with baby etc.
  I think some guys are better then the others.
  Both gender have black sheep.
  
  I wish you happy always.
  
  

  Thank you Captain, Sir!
  
  May I, my intention is to say that if let say boys/men are able to conceive baby, I guess there would be more pregnancies than women. It is because they are unable to conceive and do not have and also do not understand the pain of menstruation cycle of womanhood, they can sex whatever they like, and then they come and ask if it is alright to marry a gf with abortion, so in another words, can i say is it right to ask if it is alright to marry a bf who had sex with other gals before??
• angel7030

  28 Sep 07, 18:49

  Originally posted by de_middle:

  over-ruled

  Look!, district judge de middle, you better sustain this notion, if not, I am going to appeal to the supreme court or let the juries decide ya.
• jlzk

  28 Sep 07, 20:30

  True love=accept the other party whatever flaws she/he have.If you cant truly accept the other party it wont last trust me.Weather will accept as Gf really varies..as u know guys usually prefer virgin am i right?But if you truly love her you will not mind her past .
• ifish

  28 Sep 07, 20:38

  For a person to truly love her present, the person need to love her past
• Darkness_hacker99

  28 Sep 07, 22:47

  Originally posted by jlzk:

  True love=accept the other party whatever flaws she/he have.If you cant truly accept the other party it wont last trust me.Weather will accept as Gf really varies..as u know guys usually prefer virgin am i right?But if you truly love her you will not mind her past .

  Don't generalize.
• Cpt.ZR

  28 Sep 07, 23:00

  Originally posted by aicuole:

  Alright.. I just know this girl not long ago over the net. She's not local. As times goes by, we find ourselves love each other alot. She used webcam chat with me so I get to see how her reaction are and knew she is not faking anything. We even communicate through long distance call and she is the one who made the call. She has been planning to come to SG to visit me and I'm very happy about it. I can really feel that she really love me very much and so am I for her. By the way, we both are matured. She is 23 and I'm 21.
  
  Thing goes well until she decided to tell me a news. I know that she had a bf before and had intimacy relationship with him. I can understand that and dont mind her past. However, she told me that she made a very big mistake before and really regretted. That is the abortion. She told me that the guy want to have baby but dont bear the responsibility. He cheated on her and she is really really sad about it. With the encouragment from her family members, she decided to make a painful decision of abortion. As she told me all these stuff, she had been crying really hard. Though her parents told her that it's better not to tell the guy she like about this cos it's a sensetives issue. She decided to tell me the truth and wont want to hurt me in future when I found out anything. I agree that she took alot of courage and I really appreciated her telling me. She was already mentally-prepared before she decided to tell me this.
  
  I really feel sorry for her... she had gone through alot of hardship. She study and work at the same time to support herself though. She was really happy about coming to Singapore to meet me as she had some of her saving left. I was seriously very touched. But.. this are different things... what made me really sad was until now, she and her ex had been contacting each other!! OMG.. how can someone still contacting with the one who hurt and harm you so much?? This is the fact I cant accept. I knew cos we were having webcam and her ex call.. telling her not to believe relationship through the net and told her not to come SG as she will get cheated again!! (Seriously, I duno what to say) Her reply to him was not really harsh and thanking him with sarcasm. She explained to me that she thank him for breaking up with her as she now found someone she really loved. (Oh man.. that was just great..) She added that she never forgive him... but i cant accept this anymore.... that is just sad... really sad...
  
  She told me that she know how I feel now and she might not the one for me. She's still keen about coming to SG and wanted me to treat her as normal friend instead. Seriously I duno what to do... Suddenly my heart ache alot. i told her that we need more time to think and she told me not to force myself. There's no happiness in relationship in forcing. I agreed. However, she message me that she still loved me very much..
  
  I know some of you might think that "Aiyah, if you turly love her, you can dont mind her everything." , "The power of love can make you forget one's past", "Everyone make mistake, why cant you just forgive her?" etc... I guess you wont be saying this to yourself when this thing happen to you. Imagine your current gf having an abortion before and still contacting the guy that made her pregnant though when she talk to him with sacrasm. Well.. of course there's some guys out there which is really nice and open-hearted. These are some of the good guys.. too bad I think I'm not. I know I'm immatured at this so it's really hard for me to accept.
  
  So can any kind souls out there to give me some advices? I'm really confused now...

  ahahah I so agree on your 2nd last paragraph. the "I guess you wont be saying this to yourself when this thing happen to you. " hahah
  
  thats so very true.. well if you love her and dont mind about the cons... go for it!
• thebunny

  3 Oct 07, 20:33

  Originally posted by aicuole:

  I guess you're right... like I said, I'm really grateful for her telling me. With my thinking this way, we will get more hurt later on if we progress further. I dont know.. everything have limit.. I know I'm not perfect... what can be let go, can be let go... At first, before she told me she got the abortion, her ex call her and told her stuff to forget about me. At that time, I can understand that she might not able to forget about him and yeah I dont want to mess her life causing her to lost some people in her life as in her friends maybe. However... I would never thought that she went through a hardship of abortion because of him! Abortion is an issue which I think it's wrong for me.. or guys to discriminate girls because of that...
  
  For example, if the girl got raped.. it's not what they wanted. I can udnerstand. However... to contact with someone who did something bad to you.. that's just unbearable.. I love her... but tell me... how do I love her this way?

  They can be just friends or just wanna ask "How are you?" wat... contact only... not patch lohx. You trust her or trust her ex? Already say is the ex keep psychoing her to beware of you. This is not her fault wat...it's the ex's fault lohx... u cannot accept wat? ... heck care the ex lahx. If u truely love her then go ahead! The ex is trying sow discord... will u fall to the trap?
  
  If the girl really listens to him...then forget about her... she's not for u.
• limywv

  8 Oct 07, 23:34

   

   

• soul_rage

  9 Oct 07, 08:55

  Originally posted by thebunny:

  They can be just friends or just wanna ask "How are you?" wat... contact only... not patch lohx. You trust her or trust her ex? Already say is the ex keep psychoing her to beware of you. This is not her fault wat...it's the ex's fault lohx... u cannot accept wat? ... heck care the ex lahx. If u truely love her then go ahead! The ex is trying sow discord... will u fall to the trap?
  
  If the girl really listens to him...then forget about her... she's not for u.

  take the ex as a challenge and test for the relationship.
  
  Personally, I defeated my wife's ex in 'combat' when he tried to sow discord between her and I. I take it as a challenge and overcome him, than to accept his crap and indulge in self-pity
• sorasky

  9 Oct 07, 10:54

  Originally posted by kiss_my (_i_):

  mostly those with relationship are not virgin. (no 1 is virgin nowaday..)
  
  no one is perfect..
  
  just go ahead and love her..
  
  sometiem it is courage to keep in touch with ex..
  i salute tht..
  
  and maybe u just jealous tht she still contacting her ex..
  
  is normal..

  Wei Wei i'm still a virgin
• de_middle

  9 Oct 07, 11:00

  Originally posted by angel7030:

  Look!, district judge de middle, you better sustain this notion, if not, I am going to appeal to the supreme court or let the juries decide ya.

  u got my appointment wrongly...i'm senior counsel
• speakupforyourrights

  9 Oct 07, 11:11

  ee u like 2nd things
• toll123

  9 Oct 07, 23:55

  you shouldn't be mind those things if you likes her
• soul_rage

  10 Oct 07, 09:13

  Originally posted by toll123:

  you shouldn't be mind those things if you likes her

  Actually at the end of the day, all these things are overhyped
  
  Virgin or not? Not impt
  Had sex before or not? Not impt
  Abortion before or not? Not impt
  
  Basically its all the MCP brains working to say that you want the ideal girl which is an angel with wings in a white dress
  
  Virgin or not? After marriage no longer virgin
  Had sex before or not? After marriage have sex already