girls, would you....
-
whereas, you prefer rabbits to real companionsOriginally posted by udontknowme:some people are more emotional that others. while some people have no emotions. or some people just dont show their emotions
i dont get it why pple like to say things like men cant cry etc etc. but that's just mi lar...
and yes i will
i prefer guys like this that guys who die die oso refuse to express how they feel if they are upset etc...
butbutbut...this is just me ok...
-
It's not whether she will compromise. It's whether she likes, not tolerate in the long run. You can compromise but can you tahan ?Originally posted by Baby_Nutz:Will not lah...
To a girl will not think that a guy behave like a girl...
Being compromising not wrong... It is not a girl Character...
If u talk like a girl then we girls will tot u r ah gua or sissy or what but if you sound like a normal man who will tot of that?
Can you as a girl tahan such behaviour from a guy in the long run, everyday complaining to you over small issues? Everything also cannot say? Like that don't say anything la...if everything also want to gey gao over small things, isn't it very hard to live life?
If TS is a guy, he should try to work on being less sensitive and all that.
If TS is a girl, the fact that she is posting here, shows she has some issues to resolve about this guy, instead of asking about solutions, ie his behaviour is affecting TS, which means she has doubt about him as a partner. That's why the hesitation.
doko -
excuse me???????Originally posted by dokono:all the traits about the guy you've described are very negative, like vulnerability, sensitivity, emo, jealous and worse the girl is stronger emotionally...the girl might like you initially, but in the long run it might not.
They seem to be traits of a girl because as you know, girls are more emotional than guys. Time to start being positive.
doko
so are you saying that girls are vulnerable, sensitive, emo and jealous???? or at least it's something u'd expect of a girl? and that the guy MUST be emotionally stronger than the girl???
that the guy has to be the girl's 'pillar of support' and allow the girl to be weak?
geez. it's guys like u whom i'll NEVER date. r u the kind of guy who believes that a guy can never cry in public?? r u the kind who draws a very distinct line between males and females? that males are strong physically and emotionally, that they should earn more than the females? whereas the females ought to do the housework and take care of the kids while u come home from work, turn on the tv and eat your meal? stupid people without a mind of their own and believe rubbish articles and stereotypes.(or maybe you drew that from your own life experice. but that'll be just sad that you got the bad eggs) -
I know I wouldn't want to be with someone who emo excessively...
Once in a while it's alright, I do that as well after all...but if he gets jealous excessively even if I go out to have fun once in a while with my friends, then I would not want to be with such an insecure guy... -
yes have to draw a line because guys and girls are always different...since you say so, don't worry it's girls like you I will ALWAYS try AND MUST avoid and by the way guys will not want to date your type also, the type who always think women don't have enough rights and always want more power; I believe in respecting girls as well as they respecting me... but hey Im not here to hijack TS thread.Originally posted by udontknowme:excuse me???????
so are you saying that girls are vulnerable, sensitive, emo and jealous???? or at least it's something u'd expect of a girl? and that the guy MUST be emotionally stronger than the girl??? that the guy has to be the girl's 'pillar of support' and allow the girl to be weak?
geez. it's guys like u whom i'll NEVER date. r u the kind of guy who believes that a guy can never cry in public?? r u the kind who draws a very distinct line between males and females? that males are strong physically and emotionally, that they should earn more than the females? whereas the females ought to do the housework and take care of the kids while u come home from work, turn on the tv and eat your meal? stupid people without a mind of their own and believe rubbish articles and stereotypes.(or maybe you drew that from your own life experice. but that'll be just sad that you got the bad eggs)
ok i apologise for using the word jealous, not all will be jealous. sorry k
look, i really think you are making a big freaking deal out of this, lady. I did not say women should earn less, do the housework, take care of the kids and all the stupid conclusions you popped it out from the air. Read my post again. If women have the ability to earn more, Im all for it.
if you want, go date someone who cries everytime over small issues then. As for the bad eggs you've mentioned, yes there are. But I also met a fair share of good girls who respect people.
Women are always in search of stronger men. That's always my belief. And if you have a problem with that, it's your ba sa. Im only expressing my opinion.
doko -
agreed.Originally posted by udontknowme:excuse me???????
so are you saying that girls are vulnerable, sensitive, emo and jealous???? or at least it's something u'd expect of a girl? and that the guy MUST be emotionally stronger than the girl??? that the guy has to be the girl's 'pillar of support' and allow the girl to be weak?
geez. it's guys like u whom i'll NEVER date. r u the kind of guy who believes that a guy can never cry in public?? r u the kind who draws a very distinct line between males and females? that males are strong physically and emotionally, that they should earn more than the females? whereas the females ought to do the housework and take care of the kids while u come home from work, turn on the tv and eat your meal? stupid people without a mind of their own and believe rubbish articles and stereotypes.(or maybe you drew that from your own life experice. but that'll be just sad that you got the bad eggs)
honestly, i was in dat situation dat TS described (due to many stress and incidents dat happened recently). i complained, emo and got agitated easily. i wouldnt be ashamed to said dat, yes, i cried infront of her when i quarrelled with her recently. (in private of course).
guys are just like girls, hav emotions. true, guys hav to be stronger, as they are supposely to be the emotion pillar of girls BUT please bear in mind guys have their own emotion too! and i once read an article dat guys are weaker in their true emotion!
when he is consistently like dat, it is time to think of a solution for him. suggest dat he see a pyscharist or counsellor if he has any real serious problem.
so wad u thinks dat the guy would not dump the girl instead if it was the girl who is in this situation?? u think girls emo too much or everyday complain to the guy the guy wont sian meh?
think twice, think deep, NOT STEREOTYPE! -
He has to solve those issues himself if he is emotional. No one except himself can help him. The choice is his. Do you want to continue to emotional or do something to improve yourself? Take some action or continue to wallow in self-pity and whine? The choice is yours.Originally posted by hiphop2009:agreed.
honestly, i was in dat situation dat TS described (due to many stress and incidents dat happened recently). i complained, emo and got agitated easily. i wouldnt be ashamed to said dat, yes, i cried infront of her when i quarrelled with her recently. (in private of course).
guys are just like girls, hav emotions. true, guys hav to be stronger, as they are supposely to be the emotion pillar of girls BUT please bear in mind guys have their own emotion too! and i once read an article dat guys are weaker in their true emotion!
when he is consistently like dat, it is time to think of a solution for him. suggest dat he see a pyscharist or counsellor if he has any real serious problem.
so wad u thinks dat the guy would not dump the girl instead if it was the girl who is in this situation?? u think girls emo too much or everyday complain to the guy the guy wont sian meh?
think twice, think deep, NOT STEREOTYPE!
Any guy/girl will get sian also and no one likes someone like that. But it's up to you whether you can tahan or not in the long run.
doko -
i may nt hav reflected it in my previous post, but i think dat the girl shld help the guy and vice versa, and most imptly, seeking a resolution in the long run!Originally posted by dokono:He has to solve those issues himself if he is emotional. No one except himself can help him. The choice is his. Do you want to continue to emotional or do something to improve yourself? Take some action or continue to wallow in self-pity and whine? The choice is yours.
Any guy/girl will get sian also and no one likes someone like that. But it's up to you whether you can tahan or not in the long run.
doko
dat is when honestly and truth shld come into place when talking abt each other's feelings for another party.
tahan or nt, i believe if u love dat person, u would try your best to help him or her.
He has to solve those issues himself if he is emotional. No one except himself can help him. The choice is his. Do you want to continue to emotional or do something to improve yourself? Take some action or continue to wallow in self-pity and whine? The choice is yours.
yes, ultimately at the end of the day, he have to help himself. but dun forget, support from loved ones are as impt too. i dun think it is fair when u tell ur loved ones: hey, u emo? den dun come bother and affect my mood, go solve it yourself -
Singguys as far as i dated them, come in 2 kinds,
One Motherboy, alway pour his sorry state to you and expect gal to be both a gf and mother to them. Lame type
The other, very manly type, alway wants control over you. Expect you to listen and obey like you are just born. Gender discrimination type.
Romantic wise, zero. -
so u wan the motherboy or manly type?Originally posted by angel7030:Singguys as far as i dated them, come in 2 kinds,
One Motherboy, alway pour his sorry state to you and expect gal to be both a gf and mother to them. Lame type
The other, very manly type, alway wants control over you. Expect you to listen and obey like you are just born. Gender discrimination type.
Romantic wise, zero.
-
No wonder some Spore guys discriminate Spore woman..Originally posted by angel7030:Singguys as far as i dated them, come in 2 kinds,
One Motherboy, alway pour his sorry state to you and expect gal to be both a gf and mother to them. Lame type
The other, very manly type, alway wants control over you. Expect you to listen and obey like you are just born. Gender discrimination type.
Romantic wise, zero. -
Are u pressuring me to pick one? If so, I can tell you straight off that i will never pick the manly type, alway think they are great and only man rule the world. I hate this type of man the most!!!Originally posted by hiphop2009:so u wan the motherboy or manly type?
As for the motherboy type, I may consider, however, taking advantage of his weakiness, i shall rule over him, in long run, he shall listen to me, yeah!!! But if he dare to disobey, kick him out of my life.
Want to love also must be smart ya, love is not blind, it is alway the people that is blind. L O V E can't your read. -
kidding, hope u can find the one u likeOriginally posted by angel7030:Are u pressuring me to pick one? If so, I can tell you straight off that i will never pick the manly type, alway think they are great and only man rule the world. I hate this type of man the most!!!
As for the motherboy type, I may consider, however, taking advantage of his weakiness, i shall rule over him, in long run, he shall listen to me, yeah!!! But if he dare to disobey, kick him out of my life.
Want to love also must be smart ya, love is not blind, it is alway the people that is blind. L O V E can't your read.
but motherboy types must see when dey "motherboy", wad dey "motherboy" abt. as wad some forumnites has said, depends all on the situation. but dat doesnt gives u the right to bully dem -
Ya, especially my next apartment indians, eveynite can hear the husband scold and beat the wife with his belt, dunno why the wife can tarhan, maybe she likes it that way. I ever went to talk to the Uncle to stop scolding so loud, he shouted at me to mind my business and get out of his house. Shiitty, me so pretty also kenna scolded, Run liao....Originally posted by Q.C.Pak:No wonder some Spore guys discriminate Spore woman.. -
Originally posted by papercut87:date a guy who is very nice and caring to you but the only thing u cannot tolerate is his vulnerability and sensitivity? like he gets emo, jealous and hurt very easily (not angry) over small issues or things you say... whereby sometimes u dont even know that u've hurt him..
because of that, he thinks alot and gets really depressed after that... and comes pouring everything out to you.. and u have to listen him out. in summary, its always the girl who is stronger (emotionally) and the one comforting the guy..
but other than that.. he's seems pretty ok.... like he has pretty gd qualities of a partner.. how?
guys, is it normal to be like that?
I think it's immaterial with regards to the gender or the susceptibility of being emotional - in fact when you meet guys like these, it's always the definition of love that spur people to behave in certain manner. Certainly, our blueprint in love and its development conceive this definition, but in return, our definition of love will strengthen and reiterate how we express our behaviour and affection.
It is a skintight connection.
Humans are emotional - everybody is. The only difference lies with the degree of how overwhelming our emotions are in taking charge of our life. Love specifically touches this very deep aspect of our emotions on a profound level and if one's emotional development is screwed and especially if his/her perception is warped in love - chances are, he will transform into a man or woman you have mentioned in your post.
Lack of self evolution, understanding and wisdom (topped with the existence of abundance fear) will drive people to accept possessiveness, extreme jealousy and exert control as the key to 'secure' (what they reckon) the 'things' that belongs to them. Love is always freedom and freewill - our human intervention always produces a Touch-Of-Death, thinking that we can halt love from slipping away.
It never worked.
Love is never tangible - ironically, the more they accept these hogwash definitions, the less fulfilling their relationship will be and the more likely it is for them to destroy their own relationship with their bare hands eventually.
And the cycle will repeat until their karma and cosmic lessons whipped them into realization. Of course, realization never come to some people - which is why some will never come to understand Love beyond their closed minded perception, even till his/her deathbed.
Sometimes I find it laughable and dismaying, simultaneously, when I speak to people and discovered that the gist of the conversation seemed to suggest that their self worth & meaning of existence can only be validated through the existence of their Love relationship. And I will hear of all their emotional justification:
I) The prerogative for emotional dependency & self pity.
II) The need for excessive attention.
III) Unrealistic emotional demands that will not be able to sustain itself over a vast period of time.
They probably thought that having no BGR relationship is probably the closest resemblance of having no life. That intrinsically suggests that the person probably has very weak outlook in life & love and never believe that self love must come BEFORE love.
Like two pillars supporting a structure - if one pillar is merely leeching strength from other to be around, then surely, it will be draining for the other pillar and wouldn't be long before the whole structure collapse because this is often an unrealistic model in Love.
I cannot comprehend how, without first having that self love and seeking our identity, could one even move along the higher learning of Love? It's ridiculously simple - one, being a stranger to himself, wants to know a stranger better than himself?
No wonder divorce rate are climbing and people are indulging into nugatory relationships, only to spilt for the SAME underlying reasons over and over again. This whole distorted perception and corrupted attitude towards themselves hardly differs very much towards their relationship.
Cheers -
buay ba...Originally posted by angel7030:me so pretty also kenna scolded -
Sounds like an emo vampire to me.Originally posted by papercut87:date a guy who is very nice and caring to you but the only thing u cannot tolerate is his vulnerability and sensitivity? like he gets emo, jealous and hurt very easily (not angry) over small issues or things you say... whereby sometimes u dont even know that u've hurt him..
because of that, he thinks alot and gets really depressed after that... and comes pouring everything out to you.. and u have to listen him out. in summary, its always the girl who is stronger (emotionally) and the one comforting the guy..
but other than that.. he's seems pretty ok.... like he has pretty gd qualities of a partner.. how? guys, is it normal to be like that?
I guess it is up to you to accept.
If it was me, I wouldn't because it would just be too emotionally draining for me. I'm not one who gets vulnerable and sensitive or get emo and jealous easily or even hurt easily. I can't take all these emo stuff. Once in a while is fine, but after a while I find it too draining and I'll start avoiding the person.
So it is up to you if you can accept or not. I expect my partner to be as strong as me emotionally or stronger. -
Frankly, i have to intention to bully them, but to guide them to be a better man. Nevertheless, all gals will prefer their men to stand up for them when problem occurs but sad to sad most men will add on pepper and salt when their gfs or wifeys are in troubles, something like scolding them stupid, why this and that instead of help and console. That's badOriginally posted by hiphop2009:kidding, hope u can find the one u like
but motherboy types must see when dey "motherboy", wad dey "motherboy" abt. as wad some forumnites has said, depends all on the situation. but dat doesnt gives u the right to bully dem -
To me , if the guy is really sad , he can cry in the public . Got one friend ask me "Eh can i cry in public?"Originally posted by udontknowme:excuse me???????
so are you saying that girls are vulnerable, sensitive, emo and jealous???? or at least it's something u'd expect of a girl? and that the guy MUST be emotionally stronger than the girl??? that the guy has to be the girl's 'pillar of support' and allow the girl to be weak?
geez. it's guys like u whom i'll NEVER date. r u the kind of guy who believes that a guy can never cry in public?? r u the kind who draws a very distinct line between males and females? that males are strong physically and emotionally, that they should earn more than the females? whereas the females ought to do the housework and take care of the kids while u come home from work, turn on the tv and eat your meal? stupid people without a mind of their own and believe rubbish articles and stereotypes.(or maybe you drew that from your own life experice. but that'll be just sad that you got the bad eggs)
But crying excessively is abit weird .
Anyway , are you a girl? Pardon me if i ask eu that.
-
Most likely the wife is from India.Originally posted by angel7030:Ya, especially my next apartment indians, eveynite can hear the husband scold and beat the wife with his belt, dunno why the wife can tarhan, maybe she likes it that way. I ever went to talk to the Uncle to stop scolding so loud, he shouted at me to mind my business and get out of his house. Shiitty, me so pretty also kenna scolded, Run liao.... -
Actually , I dated this kind of guy before.Originally posted by papercut87:date a guy who is very nice and caring to you but the only thing u cannot tolerate is his vulnerability and sensitivity? like he gets emo, jealous and hurt very easily (not angry) over small issues or things you say... whereby sometimes u dont even know that u've hurt him..
because of that, he thinks alot and gets really depressed after that... and comes pouring everything out to you.. and u have to listen him out. in summary, its always the girl who is stronger (emotionally) and the one comforting the guy..
but other than that.. he's seems pretty ok.... like he has pretty gd qualities of a partner.. how? guys, is it normal to be like that?
At first, it was not too horrible to tahan.
I just feel sorry for him, so try to be understanding and give him some morale support.
But, after several months, he still moaning and complaining about the same ol sh!t, over and over again, like a broken record, that is when I get really sian lor.
I don't mind listening to guys problems, only if they are just venting it and actually DO SOMETHING about it later.
To be honest, a whiny and emo guy just means he is unable to handle difficulties and problems, and it will get on your nerves eventually.
Guys like the one you described, are insecure creatures, and they seek your validations by behaving so needy and whiny.
So, NO I will not date another one like that again.
Because I am a confident lady, my partner needs some level of self-confidence to make the relationship work.
If I want someone weak and whiny, I'd date a real girl.
Same goes to the guys, would you date a girl who behaves like a man ? -
if you dare ask who i am...
i not girl la, obviously if you still remember who i am. but from my POV i think is alright ba. i mean thats what your SO is for right? to listen to your woes and stuff. some guys are more sensitive (like me) but give them time, and they will mature to be a real man (like me).
anyway, how do you define date? date as in pa tuo as a couple, or date as in trial? if it is the latter then there is no harm. if former...well then you might wanna consider the latter first.
but seriously if you are the easily irritable type, then obviously there will be some problems in your get together, and judging by how you are already finding him a little unbearable, you might wanna try dating him in the latter definition first to check your compatibility. some guys share stuff with friends, but not with the girl they like (like me), so you being with him doesnt mean he will keep pouring his woes to you.
in a era where females wants equality in gender, we are here, with a girl complaining why she has to be the emotionally stronger in the relationship. -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
yun, why you always got so much to type de ah? and always so structured. machiam taken out from a book and chucked here. I think it's immaterial with regards to the gender or the susceptibility of being emotional - in fact when you meet guys like these, it's always the definition of love that spur people to behave in certain manner. Certainly, our blueprint in love and its development conceive this definition, but in return, our definition of love will strengthen and reiterate how we express our behaviour and affection.
It is a skintight connection.
Humans are emotional - everybody is. The only difference lies with the degree of how overwhelming our emotions are in taking charge of our life. Love specifically touches this very deep aspect of our emotions on a profound level and if one's emotional development is screwed and especially if his/her perception is warped in love - chances are, he will transform into a man or woman you have mentioned in your post.
Lack of self evolution, understanding and wisdom (topped with the existence of abundance fear) will drive people to accept possessiveness, extreme jealousy and exert control as the key to 'secure' (what they reckon) the 'things' that belongs to them. Love is always freedom and freewill - our human intervention always produces a Touch-Of-Death, thinking that we can halt love from slipping away.
It never worked.
Love is never tangible - ironically, the more they accept these hogwash definitions, the less fulfilling their relationship will be and the more likely it is for them to destroy their own relationship with their bare hands eventually.
And the cycle will repeat until their karma and cosmic lessons whipped them into realization. Of course, realization never come to some people - which is why some will never come to understand Love beyond their closed minded perception, even till his/her deathbed.
Sometimes I find it laughable and dismaying, simultaneously, when I speak to people and discovered that the gist of the conversation seemed to [b]suggest that their self worth & meaning of existence can only be validated through the existence of their Love relationship. And I will hear of all their emotional justification:
I) The prerogative for emotional dependency & self pity.
II) The need for excessive attention.
III) Unrealistic emotional demands that will not be able to sustain itself over a vast period of time.
They probably thought that having no BGR relationship is probably the closest resemblance of having no life. That intrinsically suggests that the person probably has very weak outlook in life & love and never believe that self love must come BEFORE love.
Like two pillars supporting a structure - if one pillar is merely leeching strength from other to be around, then surely, it will be draining for the other pillar and wouldn't be long before the whole structure collapse because this is often an unrealistic model in Love.
I cannot comprehend how, without first having that self love and seeking our identity, could one even move along the higher learning of Love? It's ridiculously simple - one, being a stranger to himself, wants to know a stranger better than himself?
No wonder divorce rate are climbing and people are indulging into nugatory relationships, only to spilt for the SAME underlying reasons over and over again. This whole distorted perception and corrupted attitude towards themselves hardly differs very much towards their relationship.
Cheers[/b] -
To the part in red, what's your stereotype of a "girl who behaves like a man"? If it's purely a matter of security and confidence, why not? As a matter of fact, I personally find such women very attractive.Originally posted by jojobeach:Actually , I dated this kind of guy before.
At first, it was not too horrible to tahan.
I just feel sorry for him, so try to be understanding and give him some morale support.
But, after several months, he still moaning and complaining about the same ol sh!t, over and over again, like a broken record, that is when I get really sian lor.
I don't mind listening to guys problems, only if they are just venting it and actually DO SOMETHING about it later.
To be honest, a whiny and emo guy just means he is unable to handle difficulties and problems, and it will get on your nerves eventually.
Guys like the one you described, are insecure creatures, and they seek your validations by behaving so needy and whiny.
So, NO I will not date another one like that again.
Because I am a confident lady, my partner needs some level of self-confidence to make the relationship work.
If I want someone weak and whiny, I'd date a real girl.
Same goes to the guys, would you date a girl who behaves like a man ?
Look, the geist of the matter does not centre on gender stereotypes - insecurity plague both genders and just because insecure women have a higher tendency to exhibit qualities revealing their insecurity doesn't render them inferior to insecure guys (of course, insecure women are no better than insecure guys and it should hardly come as a surprise such people invariably end up with their kind). The fact is, if you regard insecurity to be a turn-off (which I do in the case of excessive insecurity), it is a turn-off regardless of your gender.
With regard to the threadstarter, the answer to your question has pretty much got to be in your own mind. Are you prepared to live with him for who he is? At the end of the day, it really isn't an issue of what others perceive that matters. -
hmm..........