Can you forgive him if he hired an escort and had sex too?
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Originally posted by Deadweightheart:
Thank you everyone for your valuable advice and for clearing my head when I wasn't sure. I think the answer is clear to me now.
I don't think any woman can accept a man who patronizes escorts or prostitutes. Thanks for preventing me from making a mistake.
that isnt true. More then most ppl like to believe, alarmingly, there are quite a number of women whom knowingly allow their hubby to cheat outside with pros.
Better to have him cheat with pro and return at the end of the nite then have him keep a lover outside and not returning home. Men are known to b able to seperate sex from love. That's how they felt. Not saying that is right or wrong.
Just pointing out that for a marriage to work, it doesnt mean that there is only just ONE way, the traditional one.
I even know of case where the wife allow the hubby to cheat on her, while she on the other hande intro her sex buddy to her hubby as old schoolmate..... whom visit her while her hubby is out having fun, on the pretend of her being ill.
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Originally posted by EarlNeo:
that isnt true. More then most ppl like to believe, alarmingly, there are quite a number of women whom knowingly allow their hubby to cheat outside with pros.
Better to have him cheat with pro and return at the end of the nite then have him keep a lover outside and not returning home. Men are known to b able to seperate sex from love. That's how they felt. Not saying that is right or wrong.
Just pointing out that for a marriage to work, it doesnt mean that there is only just ONE way, the traditional one.
I even know of case where the wife allow the hubby to cheat on her, while she on the other hande intro her sex buddy to her hubby as old schoolmate..... whom visit her while her hubby is out having fun, on the pretend of her being ill.
so if ur wife oso tink like u then wad will happen???
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Originally posted by storywolf:
The issue I see here is you - you say one thing but practise the opposite !!!
First you are already wrong with trying to justify your sex with other men as right and his is wrong .
Next you you say you cannot fault him as you have sex with other men, then what you doing now ? faulting him !!! - you say only but apply double standard.I think the moment you sleep around and feel that it is ok for you .... you already lost the rights to fault your bf for doing what you had been doing.
I dun sleep around. I had 2 previous relationships but they didn't work out. My previous one was 4 years you think I wanted it to end? I am faithful in my relationships to the point that I sacrifice knowing other guys because I would feel I had cheated even if I gave my number to a strange man.
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Originally posted by EarlNeo:
that isnt true. More then most ppl like to believe, alarmingly, there are quite a number of women whom knowingly allow their hubby to cheat outside with pros.
Better to have him cheat with pro and return at the end of the nite then have him keep a lover outside and not returning home. Men are known to b able to seperate sex from love. That's how they felt. Not saying that is right or wrong.
Just pointing out that for a marriage to work, it doesnt mean that there is only just ONE way, the traditional one.
I even know of case where the wife allow the hubby to cheat on her, while she on the other hande intro her sex buddy to her hubby as old schoolmate..... whom visit her while her hubby is out having fun, on the pretend of her being ill.
it only works cos both are cheating on each other, they are only letting the other do wat they themselves are doing and IF caught, no one can point finger at each other mah...
does this kinda marriage really work?
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Originally posted by EarlNeo:
that isnt true. More then most ppl like to believe, alarmingly, there are quite a number of women whom knowingly allow their hubby to cheat outside with pros.
Better to have him cheat with pro and return at the end of the nite then have him keep a lover outside and not returning home. Men are known to b able to seperate sex from love. That's how they felt. Not saying that is right or wrong.
Just pointing out that for a marriage to work, it doesnt mean that there is only just ONE way, the traditional one.
I even know of case where the wife allow the hubby to cheat on her, while she on the other hande intro her sex buddy to her hubby as old schoolmate..... whom visit her while her hubby is out having fun, on the pretend of her being ill.
This is an act of being unfaithful and in a long run, i am very sure complicated problems will arise .. AND no, most guys dunno how to difference sex and love .. Just one demand from the sex buddy .. There goes your r/s.
As for the case u mention then there's no point in marriage already. Why even marry to commit ? We haven put into consideration of STDs.
U may think this way but when the shit happen to u (touchwood) u wun react this way. Trust me.
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Originally posted by EarlNeo:
that isnt true. More then most ppl like to believe, alarmingly, there are quite a number of women whom knowingly allow their hubby to cheat outside with pros.
Better to have him cheat with pro and return at the end of the nite then have him keep a lover outside and not returning home. Men are known to b able to seperate sex from love. That's how they felt. Not saying that is right or wrong.
Just pointing out that for a marriage to work, it doesnt mean that there is only just ONE way, the traditional one.
I even know of case where the wife allow the hubby to cheat on her, while she on the other hande intro her sex buddy to her hubby as old schoolmate..... whom visit her while her hubby is out having fun, on the pretend of her being ill.
so does that mean, if you have a wife you will allow her to go for pleasure with the male prostitute? Will you pay for her for this service?
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i don't want to justify anything. I'm wrong. I am sorry. I truly regret my actions. I just want one chance to prove it won't happen ever.
I will be a better boyfriend. Please give me a chance to show you I can be better. I only want to be with you. I don't want anyone else. I know that now. Please give me a chance.
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Originally posted by iamsorry:
i don't want to justify anything. I'm wrong. I am sorry. I truly regret my actions. I just want one chance to prove it won't happen ever.
I will be a better boyfriend. Please give me a chance to show you I can be better. I only want to be with you. I don't want anyone else. I know that now. Please give me a chance.
you sincere bo? If truly sincere you will go to her direct.
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It's a frightening thought that a man would visit pros while he has already a gf. Worse if he readily admits to it and give stupid and immoral excuses.
What is he treating you as? A piece of rag? And you dare trust your future with him?
Perhaps immorality and liberalism is the way of life nowadays. It gives one freedom, but the price one pays is often painful, not only for the hurt of oneself when the realization of emptiness strikes. It hurts others too, for faithfulness, trust and integrity is still desired, no matter how liberal we may become.
Forgive him by all means, but not because you fear being left alone. You are more appreciated than you will realize. Forgive him, but not because you do not want to go thru the hassle of building up a relationship again. You owe it to yourself to get a good man ( not perfect man for he dont exist).
Forgive him only IF HE CAN ASSURE YOU HE IS REMORSEFUL AND VOWS NEVER TO HURT YOU AGAIN.
If he can't even take this simple vow, tell him to get lost.
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If him wanting to try is OK. Then is it ok for me to try? Maybe maybe I can find a rich and handsome and young and morally upright guy? A perfect guy?
It's not shampoo you cannot TRY. Everyone of them is a human being with feelings, who cry, who bleed, who hurts. How is that OK?
He hurts and I do not? He has the luxury of hiding at home with his sorrows. I have to go to work, face my colleagues and put on a brave front for the world. How is it OK?
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Originally posted by iamsorry:
i don't want to justify anything. I'm wrong. I am sorry. I truly regret my actions. I just want one chance to prove it won't happen ever.
I will be a better boyfriend. Please give me a chance to show you I can be better. I only want to be with you. I don't want anyone else. I know that now. Please give me a chance.
don't waste your time here. it proves nothing.
this place is for people to get some form of help and support. obviously, u won't be getting any here.
u may want to start your own post and ask i was unfaithful, how can i be trusted to be faithful again?? or something like that...
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If he only comes here indicate he wants to have another chance and not go to TS directly to ask for it, then confirm this guy not sincere. Dump him.
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Originally posted by iamsorry:
i don't want to justify anything. I'm wrong. I am sorry. I truly regret my actions. I just want one chance to prove it won't happen ever.
I will be a better boyfriend. Please give me a chance to show you I can be better. I only want to be with you. I don't want anyone else. I know that now. Please give me a chance.
Weird.. how come this sentence sound like photocopy thousand and thousand of times when guy did wrong. Or maybe did wrongs..Kaoz..
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seriously if one is old enought to think
i wonder why is there a need to post such a Q here
to ask ppl whom u dun even know u that much?
U mean ur own personal life to be determine
by strangers?
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TS, no matter wat .. U are the one making the choice and make sure u dun regret when making one. Youth of a lady is limited, dun waste it on some unfaithful guy
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Originally posted by iamsorry:
i don't want to justify anything. I'm wrong. I am sorry. I truly regret my actions. I just want one chance to prove it won't happen ever.
I will be a better boyfriend. Please give me a chance to show you I can be better. I only want to be with you. I don't want anyone else. I know that now. Please give me a chance.
All you wanted for and needed is a chance to prove yourself.But before that you did something you planned for, "booking a escort later having intimate relation with the counterpart". During this planned schedule, have you wonder what are the effects? You couldn't think. You just wanted to satified your untolerable desire.
At the end of the day, remorse and regret your wrong doings now.
Though I hated people like you. Still, Good Luck.
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Originally posted by Tan.john52:
seriously if one is old enought to think
i wonder why is there a need to post such a Q here
to ask ppl whom u dun even know u that much?
U mean ur own personal life to be determine
by strangers?
Let give TS the benifit of doubt and we are humans .. We need to vent our anger etc etc and sometimes it's just for the sake of saying and for some cases it's just a scenrio to console oneself. -
Originally posted by Tan.john52:
seriously if one is old enought to think
i wonder why is there a need to post such a Q here
to ask ppl whom u dun even know u that much?
U mean ur own personal life to be determine
by strangers?
because it is not easy to be rational when you are emotional. -
Originally posted by Kutter:
All you wanted for and needed is a chance to prove yourself.But before that you did something you planned for, "booking a escort later having intimate relation with the counterpart". During this planned schedule, have you wonder what are the effects? You couldn't think. You just wanted to satified your untolerable desire.
At the end of the day, remorse and regret your wrong doings now.
Though I hated people like you. Still, Good Luck.
Kutter, i agree with you. this kind of sorry no cure. Should be unforgiven and sentence to death.
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TS just ask urself tis, do u still love him? which is more painful? not being with him or being with him with the risk he might be unfaithful again? the decision is yours... if u really wanna forgive him then go ahead.. it's ur life afterall...
TS's bf or ex-bf or watever... i rather u spend the time and effort proving to TS tat u r sincere instead of trying to justify urself with a grp of strangers here... if u just wanna have fun and fool ard, at least have the balls to admit it and face the music...
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Lady of this topic raised, whether chance given to "him" or not. Please consider this carefully, do not regret like he does now.
Its your choice, its your life.
Wishing you success both in work & life.
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Originally posted by Kutter:
Lady of this topic raised, whether chance given to "him" or not. Please consider this carefully, do not regret like he does now.
Its your choice, its your life.
Wishing you success both in work & life.
Thank you for the kindness you have shown. Bless your heart. -
Originally posted by iamsorry:
Ms.shells: you think i didn't think of it? i will if she tells me to. in front of my family too.
if i get this chance i will not make the same mistake again. talk is cheap yes. but i can't use actions to prove anything if i don't get the chance.
why are people so quick to give the death penalty to everyone that makes a mistake?
do you think that once a criminal always a criminal? have none of you made mistakes??
I really really regret my actions. This will never happen again. i'm just asking for one chance to prove myself.
u shld have known not to do this in e 1st place, right? -
Originally posted by Deadweightheart:
Thank you for the kindness you have shown. Bless your heart.wadever we say, e decision is all yours
but we hoped u have made a right decision
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Originally posted by Midlusionz:
U see the diff anot ler .. BEFORE him .. while the guy is TOGETHER with her.I cbf how many guys my gf may sleep with before getting together with me and no other guys except me when she is in a r/s with me.
I don't see the different & don't except the lame excuse of it was the past !!! Whether it is the past - you are still response for it still.
if based on your theory - you kill someone last year - you are a murder then, but since you with current bf - you did not kill anyone yet - does that make you not a murder ? You still killed someone !!!