long distance releationship
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Relate and let go lar, why all this psycho drama?
If it is a relationship - know jolly well its a finsihed product, a thing, how to improve on sth finished , its trying to improve a circle.
Relating is flowing, vulnerable and uncertain, its a present-moment existential expereince - its ever fresh.
The quality of one's relationship(s) comes about cos the quality of one's ability to RELATE is there.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Calling her everyday is too much lah. You are too predictable, so this is a very boring long distance relationship.
Call her on random days lah.
Sometimes send her a small present in the mail. But don't do it too often lah. A small surprise is better than always a ritual.
Long distance relationship what's there to fight about ?
You are a guy, even if you think you are right, you don't have to force her to accept you are right. So what if you are always right ?.. you are indirectly telling her that she very stupid that's why she is always wrong lah !!
Would you rather be right or do you prefer to still have a gf ?
A relationship needs something to look forward to. You got plan to go visit her or not ? What are your plans in the next one year ? If you got no plans no idea, then a long distance relationship loses it's purpose.
ya going there this december to celebrate christmas with her next year also.
i know the point about Would you rather be right or do you prefer to still have a gf ?
but why mus she start the fight sometimes.next year she coming back to stay already.got a few plans la like suprise visit go to her house without telling her.surprise gifts also,then go overseas for holidays.
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Originally posted by Fugazzi:
Relate and let go lar, why all this psycho drama?
If it is a relationship - know jolly well its a finsihed product, a thing, how to improve on sth finished , its trying to improve a circle.
Relating is flowing, vulnerable and uncertain, its a present-moment existential expereince - its ever fresh.
The quality of one's relationship(s) comes about cos the quality of one's ability to RELATE is there.
its not drama i jus asking the ways to improve it.i am not saying out like a story wat.anyway its good la except there are somedays of the month she will be irrated like wat i say.and no its not her period. -
If u can be u and relate that is good enough - improve on relationship - its a thing!
Unlearn the mistakes of your conditioning
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Originally posted by tofushop193:
its not drama i jus asking the ways to improve it.i am not saying out like a story wat.anyway its good la except there are somedays of the month she will be irrated like wat i say.and no its not her period.Everyone will have a bad day now and then. She has a bad day already, and there is nowhere for her to vent her frustration. That is why when you called her, she is noticably irritated, as she is trying to keep her cool and stop herself from directing her anger at you.
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Originally posted by tofushop193:
ya going there this december to celebrate christmas with her next year also.
i know the point about Would you rather be right or do you prefer to still have a gf ?
but why mus she start the fight sometimes.next year she coming back to stay already.got a few plans la like suprise visit go to her house without telling her.surprise gifts also,then go overseas for holidays.
You trying too hard to be a mystery man lah. Mystery at moderation is romantic. Mystery overdone is IRRITATING.
Surprise visit and overseas holiday ? That means she don't know you will be visiting lah, then how is she suppose to plan for it and look forward to it ?
She can start the fight, but you don't have to join the argument. Women are sensitive creatures, the more senseless things you say, the more reason for her to get upset with you. Learn to stay out of the line of fire.
Next year is next year.. many months away. Relationship must be worked on today, not tomorrow, not next year.
Woman's love is like a flower that needs constant nurturing ( to grow) and admiration ( to feel wanted).
Do you water your flower every half a year ?
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I had a long dist. for 5 years before getting married - now have 2 kids with her. There were ups and down, 300-400 dollar phone bills every month, once a year come back, half a year she would fly over, once broke up, once tried seeing other people, in the end we got back together and we got married. Nowadays you have Skype which is so much easier and cheaper.
LDR only works out on a few conditions - low level social life - ie.. she only goes out with girls - I only hang out out with guys. And staying with parents or family. They keep you kind of accountable. It easily falls apart if someone is staying in a hostel or constantly hanging out with all sorts of people.
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i guess it must happen at the right place and a right time. imagine if you are a teenager, i dun think one is able to afford the 300 - 400 dollar bill every month >.<
it's difficult but it's possible coz it happens to some people.
I agree with jojobeach. woman's love is like a flower need constand nurturing and admiration to grow and feel wanted. long distance relationship sometimes is hard to provide that.
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i should say 2 out of 10 long distance r/s will work out.
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Originally posted by Subaru WRX:
i should say 2 out of 10 long distance r/s will work out.
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Originally posted by Subaru WRX:
i should say 2 out of 10 long distance r/s will work out.
I think is 0 to half or one out of 10 long distance relationship will work out only.Already not easy to maintain relationship to work out for couples staying in the same countries what more about they are apart. Me a victim of this , i know.
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Do not mistake a long distance relationship with someone who doesnt want to be near you>LOL
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someone think people are fools.
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TS,
Where is your gf from? I share the same situation with you, my gf is from phillipiness and we contact mostly by phones and she's will be coming back again to Singapore by year end and in the meantime i'm going there next month to visit her.
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i visiting her on 12 dec but i say i will be there at 13 dec.anyway she stays in indonesia.things are fine now.ok the irritation days are over.we have already plan what to do when i am visiting her.ya last month my bill was 200.kinda of ex for me but still affordable.i now using the starhub 128 with calling card one month mabe i spend about 40 dollar calling her.btw spade1 how does the skype calling works.whats the rate???
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Originally posted by tofushop193:
i visiting her on 12 dec but i say i will be there at 13 dec.anyway she stays in indonesia.things are fine now.ok the irritation days are over.we have already plan what to do when i am visiting her.ya last month my bill was 200.kinda of ex for me but still affordable.i now using the starhub 128 with calling card one month mabe i spend about 40 dollar calling her.btw spade1 how does the skype calling works.whats the rate???
that one day early surprise is nothing short of a rude gesture.
Do you expect her to drop everything she is doing on 12 dec to receive your sudden arrival ? She may be your gf, but she also has a life other than waiting at home for you everyday. If my bf do this to me, I will be irritated as hell.
Don't ruin a good reunion with your thoughtlessness.
Indonesia is only 1 hour flight away. Why do you have to wait so many months to go visit her ? Are you a miser of some sort ?
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your gf lives at where?
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Skype is very cheap... you can buy any headset with a microphone piece and start chatting. You can call their phone directly, or even cheaper is to talk free just over IP, ie. without phone charges. Depending on the speed of the internet in her town, sometimes the connection is not so good, but you'll learn to adopt to the pace of conversation. However, the important question is can't she come over to join you or vice versa? Is it career, education or whatever is stopping both from being with each other? Do consider this... how long have you known each other? if it is already a long time, perhaps you'd consider marriage?
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Long distance relationship hen tong ku de!!
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Originally posted by Fantagf:
Long distance relationship hen tong ku de!!
Indonesia not very far lah. So cannot classify as long distance relationship lor.
Your darling live where now ?
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indonesia isn't far from Singapore, getting there by plane isn't expensive too.
I've been in a long distance relationship where my bills amount to at least $1000+ singapore dollars every month
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Indonesia not very far lah. So cannot classify as long distance relationship lor.
Your darling live where now ?
I have dumped him into the rubbish bin. No where to be found. hahahhha! -
Originally posted by Fantagf:
Long distance relationship hen tong ku de!!
Not all the time though.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
that one day early surprise is nothing short of a rude gesture.
Do you expect her to drop everything she is doing on 12 dec to receive your sudden arrival ? She may be your gf, but she also has a life other than waiting at home for you everyday. If my bf do this to me, I will be irritated as hell.
Don't ruin a good reunion with your thoughtlessness.
Indonesia is only 1 hour flight away. Why do you have to wait so many months to go visit her ? Are you a miser of some sort ?
i am studying i am not a miser.exams are coming.shes doing her fyp so if i go earlier most probably she wont have time for me too.
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Originally posted by dangerboi:
indonesia isn't far from Singapore, getting there by plane isn't expensive too.
I've been in a long distance relationship where my bills amount to at least $1000+ singapore dollars every month
power 1000 plus sia...not i don wan to go.is i cant go now.