Mistress
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Angrrry.00
Be strong, turn to your family and religion for help and comfort.
What your in-laws have to say about his unfaithfulness? What are their stands? -
Hi Arapahoe,
I don't know how true is it.
But my husband got more than 1 china mistress.1 based in Sgp & the other in China
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
TWE : Thanks for your advice. I do know is my own flesh and blood but is it fair keeping the child whereby i dont think i can love the child based on what the father did & will the child blame me during the growing stage that i choose to give brith to him/her.It is not healthy for the child to grow up from a single-parent family,the child will face a lot of pressure as well.
Hi Angrrry,
Ultimately it is your own choice as to what you will want to do with your unborn child, but you may want to consider other alternatives such as putting him/her up for adoption instead of aborting him/her.
Cheers.
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Hi Arapahoe,
He admitted it infront of his parents and my family that he have got more than 1 mistress & have been sleeping around in China while on business trip.
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TS:
It's your husband's fault, not your child's! Spare your child the agony! Think of the possibilities! -
Hi Medicated Oil,
He blamed me for my last miscarriage which was my 2nd miscarriage within 4 years. He thinks that i can't bear anymore child for him this lifetime so he started sourcing for another woman after my last miscarriage. He didn't know that i was 4 weeks pregnant when he moved out of the house and i didn't know i was already pregnant as well till i found out a week plus ago.
I don't need his money since he is earning lesser than me.
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then it's time for you to move on....
like aforementioned, google is your friend..
for both lawyers and if you still want, PIs...
good luck.. and may you find happiness in the future..
in the meantime, get him.. and get him bad..
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
Hi Medicated Oil,
He blamed me for my last miscarriage which was my 2nd miscarriage within 4 years. He thinks that i can't bear anymore child for him this lifetime so he started sourcing for another woman after my last miscarriage. He didn't know that i was 4 weeks pregnant when he moved out of the house and i didn't know i was already pregnant as well till i found out a week plus ago.
I don't need his money since he is earning lesser than me.
Hi Angrrry,
I do not like pointing fingers at others as a general rule, but he is the one at fault here and he is just using this as an excuse. If he truly wants a child that badly, he could have seek the help of a surrogate mother. Putting that aside, he has more than one affair outside, and that has already proven that he is just being irresponsible and is putting an unjustified blame on you.
Cheers.
P.S. Your story has somehow appeared on the ''Lian He Wan Bao'' newspaper, page 7.
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Sorry but i dont read Lianhe Wanbao & i don't understand how come it appear there but thanks for informing me about it.
Miscarriage is really a sad thing for a mother to through and yet as a husband he is not there to support mentally but instead of doing such things to me!I really hope that someone could knock some sense to him & give him a wake up call as i am really exhausted physically & mentally by some of his mean sms that he sent over.
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Originally posted by TrueHeart:
Hi Angrrry,
I do not like pointing fingers at others as a general rule, but he is the one at fault here and he is just using this as an excuse. If he truly wants a child that badly, he could have seek the help of a surrogate mother. Putting that aside, he has more than one affair outside, and that has already proven that he is just being irresponsible and is putting an unjustified blame on you.
Cheers.
P.S. Your story has somehow appeared on the ''Lian He Wan Bao'' newspaper, page 7.
Maybe you can scan the newspaper article and post it here for us to see?
I wrote so many threads but none of them appeared in the newspaper. So sad
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Originally posted by fireng:
Maybe you can scan the newspaper article and post it here for us to see?
I wrote so many threads but none of them appeared in the newspaper. So sad
Hi fireng,
Here is the article.
http://img32.imageshack.us/img32/7317/scan0001vs.jpg
Cheers.
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
Miscarriage is really a sad thing for a mother to through and yet as a husband he is not there to support mentally but instead of doing such things to me!I really hope that someone could knock some sense to him & give him a wake up call as i am really exhausted physically & mentally by some of his mean sms that he sent over.
Angrry,
Before you abort the child , please give it a second thought.
After 2 miscarriages, have you consult a fertility doctor ?
If you abort this child now, will you be able to conceive again in future ?
A miscarriage is painful for a mother, it is also very depressing for a father.
Perhaps you are going through natal depression ? 7 week pregnancy means you had sex with him bout 2 months ago .........
Is he claiming he has china mistress just to spite you , perhaps over some unjust words you threw at him ???
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Dear Angrry, I guess you got no choice but to let him go. This is coming from a man, who of course, very much wish that my wife will take me back if i had made a mistake. I even feel that you might be willing to forgive and forget. Although i had been very tempted, as you can see from my previous post. I want to be with her so much that i even employ the PRC girl PT in my company. We have not gone into any form of serious relationships yet, but i am trying to be as professional as possible in the work relationship, to slow down and put a stop to this. Anyway, please don't be angry no more. Since his heart is no longer with you, its best that you move on. Best of luck and you might want to remind your next partner that sharing him is totally unacceptable n will definitely lead to divorce. Thats what's my wife said to me some time and so far it has kept me very conscious of potential consequences.
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Originally posted by Fugazzi:
My meaning of prostituting oneself is that of compromising oneself (what one is or wants to be) to stay/enter into a ... cos one gains $$$ or .... security.
What happens when the other (another) can no longer provide $$$$ or security. The 'ends' are no longer there. One is bound to feel sore and cheated cos in the first place one was using the other as a means to his/her end. Hence the conflict(s) and blame game.
As to whether it holds true - it depends on whether one is compromising or reconciling oneself to one's choice of making the means as an end unto itself or making the means an end to ... Being self-honest one would know or one can simply ignore and be ...
You can always speak from a comfort environment but when you step out of your comfort zone you realized that there are indeed people out there have very different opinon of getting themselved out of their social economics suitation. .....so the term prostitution does not necessary applied.Married became a social human contract. The loving duffy..... marriage the one you love....yours truly vs pulling your own sock and getting what you want.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
My co-worker from China also told me there's several "Mistress Village", in pockets of China.
Affluent men keeps their young mistresses, much like Feudal China's concubine culture.
Back in those days, rich men are able to provide for their primary family and keep a concubine.
Singaporean men are a disgrace, they want to keep mistress but their primary wife had to suffer for it.
Embarrasing difference between China men and Singaporean men with mistress...
I come to a conclusion if this one of the culture that they entertained their customers or their vendors entertained their customers....by bringing them to karoke and follow by social escort. It probably became a peer pressured by the vendors or customers to get into the relationship.
That is probably a social issued that Singaporean woman need to bring it up openly in public to address to Singapore companies in China.
The problems with most Singaporean men are not weathy enough to keep a mistress....
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
Hi Arapahoe,
He admitted it infront of his parents and my family that he have got more than 1 mistress & have been sleeping around in China while on business trip.
I am sorry to hear that but i guess at this stage you have to ask yourself if you want to be with him or drop him. Of course having kids make it all the more difficult. But i guess at the end of the day whatever decision you made it will help to move forward with your life either with our without your partners.
Sometime career and relationship may not go side by side. This is played all over. couples at some point need to ask what is important.
My wife n I seperated for 1 yr and I deceided that one of us should drop our job with Risk of career stabilities and economics adjustment.
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No need for PI, just a lawyer is enough.
No need to get any proof of wrong doing.
Just declare that the marriage has irretrievably broken down due to ____________, and get the lawyer to petition for divorce.
Reject all attempts for counselling or reconciliation.
That is if you are really determined.
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What were your and his parents' reactions to his confession? It's always to better to discuss this issue with him seriously especially since you are pregnant but if the marriage is really unsalvagable then you might want to get a lawyer for yourself.
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Hi Anthiadon,
I am trying to save the marriage on one hand but on the other hand he is not even remorseful about it, he even came up with ridiculous suggestion to share husband. I really come in to a stand that i am very tired physically & mentally to continue all these games wih him & his mistresses.
I've given him enough chances & even try to work things out but i guess it is really difficult at this point of time unless somebody can get him wake up his mind.
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Hi CannyOng,
We studied & graduated from the same university but as years go by i climbed up the corporate ladder faster than him.
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Hi TrueHeart,
Thank you for showing me the newspaper article. I guess quite a number of my friends who know me well will know what i've went through over the years.
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what you should do, is to start accumulating evidence that you have been contributing actively to the matrimonial assets, better yet, show that you've been contributing more than he did.
start collecting things like household bills receipts, payments you made etc, build up a past history file. Check out the ownership of your assets like HDB flats, private apartments etc, many people just don't pay attention to such things until matrimonial cracks start appearing. What you want to do, is to show the court of any potential divorce proceedings that you have been at least an equal partner financially in the union. Then you'll have a better chance of keeping as much things as you can out of reach of the gold-digging whore on the make.
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dude wtf your situation is on the papers. i think u should get that cut out and throw it in your husbands face.
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
Hi Anthiadon,
I am trying to save the marriage on one hand but on the other hand he is not even remorseful about it, he even came up with ridiculous suggestion to share husband. I really come in to a stand that i am very tired physically & mentally to continue all these games wih him & his mistresses.
I've given him enough chances & even try to work things out but i guess it is really difficult at this point of time unless somebody can get him wake up his mind.
What exactly is it you are trying to hold on to ?
You are desperately grasping at air.
You cannot force him to love you , just as you cannot force him to love the unborn child.
Take whatever material compensation you can get from him.
Plan a future minus this unfaithful man. The reason he stray from a normal marriage is not your fault, he is the one that's broken inside.
Let the other woman pick up his dirty socks and underwear. Let her do his lame ass biddings.
Don't let this man and ignorant mistress take away your self-esteem. You are capable of living your own happy life.
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Originally posted by Angrrry.00:
Hi Anthiadon,
I am trying to save the marriage on one hand but on the other hand he is not even remorseful about it, he even came up with ridiculous suggestion to share husband. I really come in to a stand that i am very tired physically & mentally to continue all these games wih him & his mistresses.
I've given him enough chances & even try to work things out but i guess it is really difficult at this point of time unless somebody can get him wake up his mind.
Don't bother trying. You are only making yourself feel that you are the one at fault for being unable to salvage the relationship, despite the fact that he is the one who committed adultery.
Be brave, divorce him, and walk away without looking back. Never ever pity him even if he comes back to you seeking for help - Such a man is not worth your time.
And remember one thing. YOU ARE NOT AT FAULT. You did nothing wrong. Thus, don't stress yourself up over someone who is not even worth your breath.
