habit in household chores
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Control freak lah you.
Your father never complain. you complain for wat ?
You angry your parents dote on your brother issit ?
You want to be a hero.. other people must follow you har ?
Get a life lah.
U say he shouldn't say habit this habit tat.. first of all.. why must you ask ? Now you ask.. you don get the exact answer you want then you kao peh simi ?
You got no gf/bf, so everyone else in the family also cannot bring gf back home issit ?
Yah lah.. you very filiial lah.. you very saint lah.. you very tok kong lah.. happy ? Feel good about yourself right ? Feel so superior right ? Time to get down from your high horse lah.
Your father say no choice or issit you the one say no choice? Ofcors he got a choice.
Since when did you become the boss of the household ? Your father is still alive hor.. Know your place in the family ok? good.
hopefully next time when you are old your dear children wont tell you to do household chores claiming it's ur personal favourite hobby..and you see ur son idling away..doing nothing..and my objective is want my bro to share my parent's burden..i am doing it..but he doesn't, that doesnt make me any superior...but just want some initiative..not must tell then do...and it's damn irritating when you got a bro who don't do housework but yet still think it's perfectly perfectly OK!
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Old people tend to do weird stuff anyway. But if can help, help loh. Father sweep, you can mop what.
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Originally posted by themoment86:
hopefully next time when you are old your dear children wont tell you to do household chores claiming it's ur personal favourite hobby..and you see ur son idling away..doing nothing..and my objective is want my bro to share my parent's burden..i am doing it..but he doesn't, that doesnt make me any superior...but just want some initiative..not must tell then do...and it's damn irritating when you got a bro who don't do housework but yet still think it's perfectly perfectly OK!
You really gota stop behaving like you own your brother.You are the sister NOT the mother.
Next time you got children, and the older child keeps bossing around the younger one, don tell me you are going to say it's perfectly ok. In fact, you'd get pissed off with the bossy child for being a trouble maker.
Its the parent job to discipline their children..Not the children job to discipline another sibling.
So you are good at household chores, to you it's very important. But others in the family may or may not think like you.
If they don't, leave them be. As long as they do not cause harm or severe inconvenience.
The reason why you are frustrated is that you are UNABLE to control your younger brother.
U want him to behave the way YOU want him to. When he doesn't do it your parents don't support your "controlling" behavior, you get upset.
Household chores is just another lame excuse. Since you are working, why don you hire a part time cleaner ? This way, everyone will be happy and there will be no more argument/conflict.
Instead you want to get angry at your brother over household chores ? Seriously, get yourself a life and stop being a control freak.
As for the "hobby" part, sure he gave some lame shit reply. So ? That's what people do when they get cornered. You gota understand that you cannot take this kind of remarks seriously. You can keep harping on this "stupid' remark, does it make your life any better ? No it doesn't.. so let it go already.
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Originally posted by Chester_Lim:
She is a brainless troll.
There was one day me and Badzmaro was talking at then suddenly she tell us that she was going to pee on us. Then we joke about pee shower. She kept quiet after that. But what's up with the pee shower?
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Originally posted by parn:
Are you speaking from own experience? Like you know you're not any better than your own parents?If yes, then I will believe you.
If no, then I have always wanted to tell you that you have a funny name. Which quirky guy called himself a Chester nowadays? What the hell is a Chester??
Change your name and I hope you can become normal one day.
Maybe he wear a "chasity belt" deprive himself of physical pleasure.......
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
You really gota stop behaving like you own your brother.You are the sister NOT the mother.
Next time you got children, and the older child keeps bossing around the younger one, don tell me you are going to say it's perfectly ok. In fact, you'd get pissed off with the bossy child for being a trouble maker.
Its the parent job to discipline their children..Not the children job to discipline another sibling.
So you are good at household chores, to you it's very important. But others in the family may or may not think like you.
If they don't, leave them be. As long as they do not cause harm or severe inconvenience.
The reason why you are frustrated is that you are UNABLE to control your younger brother.
U want him to behave the way YOU want him to. When he doesn't do it your parents don't support your "controlling" behavior, you get upset.
Household chores is just another lame excuse. Since you are working, why don you hire a part time cleaner ? This way, everyone will be happy and there will be no more argument/conflict.
Instead you want to get angry at your brother over household chores ? Seriously, get yourself a life and stop being a control freak.
As for the "hobby" part, sure he gave some lame shit reply. So ? That's what people do when they get cornered. You gota understand that you cannot take this kind of remarks seriously. You can keep harping on this "stupid' remark, does it make your life any better ? No it doesn't.. so let it go already.
which part of my entry says i am controlling my OLDER bro?and moreover are you trying to imply that whatever your siblings does, you do not have the right to tell them from right and wrong?because it's ur parent's job?rubbish..if i really want to control my family they would have done it my way LONG ago...apparently i just want them to know what is happening in the house...for in case some take it for granted while some just can't be bothered...and i feel it's not very good that my bro brings her gf back and close the door..finish their business and left...before they left my silly mother still must lay the dish and wait for them to eat..finish eating still must clean up for them while they just left the house..sometimes without even saying goodbye..i dont do that when i bring my partner home...my bf will scold me if i do that! hahaha
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Originally posted by themoment86:
which part of my entry says i am controlling my OLDER bro?and moreover are you trying to imply that whatever your siblings does, you do not have the right to tell them from right and wrong?because it's ur parent's job?rubbish..if i really want to control my family they would have done it my way LONG ago...apparently i just want them to know what is happening in the house...for in case some take it for granted while some just can't be bothered...and i feel it's not very good that my bro brings her gf back and close the door..finish their business and left...before they left my silly mother still must lay the dish and wait for them to eat..finish eating still must clean up for them while they just left the house..sometimes without even saying goodbye..i dont do that when i bring my partner home...my bf will scold me if i do that! hahaha
Even if you want to control your family, you can't. So don't paint yourself to be so high and mighty lah.
Sure, you can suggest to your brother, have a chat, but if he doesn't care to listen to you, there's nothing you can do , except come here and rant about it.
You can try talking to your parents, but you can't make them control your brother if they don't see the need to either.
Your parents may have their own reason for allowing your brother do what he did with his gf.
You only have a narrow view and cannot see the bigger picture. That's too bad.
If your brother wants to get intimate with his gf, and your parents chased them out, they are just gonna do it some where else.
Maybe in a sleazy hotel . Or if he is broke, they'd be doing it in a park, in the backseat of their vehicle, somewhere where he can get caught and put into lockup. Is that more embarrasing for your parents to bail him out of the police station , or is it better they let him do what he wants at home ??
At home, your parents know who he's going it with, what kind of girl he is dating, at least your parents know he is not out there somewhere getting into more serious trouble.
How your brother behaves is not your parent's main concern. It seems his behavior is affecting only you.
If your parents mind, they'd have told him off themselves. If they don't and they choose to enable his behavior, then it's your parents' choice to let it become so.
You on the other hand needs to back off and go mind your own business. OK ? Good.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Even if you want to control your family, you can't. So don't paint yourself to be so high and mighty lah.
Sure, you can suggest to your brother, have a chat, but if he doesn't care to listen to you, there's nothing you can do , except come here and rant about it.
You can try talking to your parents, but you can't make them control your brother if they don't see the need to either.
Your parents may have their own reason for allowing your brother do what he did with his gf.
You only have a narrow view and cannot see the bigger picture. That's too bad.
If your brother wants to get intimate with his gf, and your parents chased them out, they are just gonna do it some where else.
Maybe in a sleazy hotel . Or if he is broke, they'd be doing it in a park, in the backseat of their vehicle, somewhere where he can get caught and put into lockup. Is that more embarrasing for your parents to bail him out of the police station , or is it better they let him do what he wants at home ??
At home, your parents know who he's going it with, what kind of girl he is dating, at least your parents know he is not out there somewhere getting into more serious trouble.
How your brother behaves is not your parent's main concern. It seems his behavior is affecting only you.
If your parents mind, they'd have told him off themselves. If they don't and they choose to enable his behavior, then it's your parents' choice to let it become so.
You on the other hand needs to back off and go mind your own business. OK ? Good.
sorry for being ignorance...guess i am wasting my time explaining things to you, based on your other post..i think you are not really good at giving sound advice..please do not reply to my entry further..thank you
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Even if you want to control your family, you can't. So don't paint yourself to be so high and mighty lah.
Sure, you can suggest to your brother, have a chat, but if he doesn't care to listen to you, there's nothing you can do , except come here and rant about it.
You can try talking to your parents, but you can't make them control your brother if they don't see the need to either.
Your parents may have their own reason for allowing your brother do what he did with his gf.
You only have a narrow view and cannot see the bigger picture. That's too bad.
If your brother wants to get intimate with his gf, and your parents chased them out, they are just gonna do it some where else.
Maybe in a sleazy hotel . Or if he is broke, they'd be doing it in a park, in the backseat of their vehicle, somewhere where he can get caught and put into lockup. Is that more embarrasing for your parents to bail him out of the police station , or is it better they let him do what he wants at home ??
At home, your parents know who he's going it with, what kind of girl he is dating, at least your parents know he is not out there somewhere getting into more serious trouble.
How your brother behaves is not your parent's main concern. It seems his behavior is affecting only you.
If your parents mind, they'd have told him off themselves. If they don't and they choose to enable his behavior, then it's your parents' choice to let it become so.
You on the other hand needs to back off and go mind your own business. OK ? Good.
ya la..stop it la. Every family has a different culture.
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themoment86, give you my 2 cents worth as these situations are very touchy.
1) Your parents are not doing anything so why should you. The victims are not voicing out opinion while you are very proactive doesn't make things better. As you are the only one in the family who is against your elder brother, you are at the losing end.
2) Problem is not just with your brother but also with parents. Take things at small steps, to deal with your brother attitude, you need to fix your parents' attitude first, because they hold the ultimate power. No use wasting brain cells when your parents does not stand along the same line.
3) Work your way to win parents favor. Parents likes to have balance and harmony. When you are very against your brother, they will stop you from breaking harmony. Instead of being proactive, have a passive attitude. Don't pinpoint, or nag, or help them with the chores. They may take you for granted. Your parents have brains and will surely know that at the end of the day it's all amount to teaching your brother correct value. wait until they complain, and then work your way to let them know about it. In a family, it is not about me and myself. It's about everyone contributing, and that's why we call them family and about cultivating right values.
4) You have no rights. If you are in a traditional chinese family, know that as a girl and being youngest of the family does not entitle you the right to discipline someone above you. Unless you are the one with financial ability to support the family.
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my parent don't dare to ask my brother to do anything..cause they are very very afraid of him as he would yell, scream and say want to kill us because he is very piss off...sometimes i think he is mentally unsound...so i think they are just afraid of him...so usually i will tell them to speak up..they are afraid of many things actually...haha..anyway..i am not in any traditional family...think my bro just like to use his voice and muscle to stay away from household stuff..i really cannot stand it when he is not happy at certain things..he would scream and throw things when we talk back..oh..and threaten to kill us..a elder bro but dun have brother de "seh"..
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now then i know themoment86 is a girl. lol.
anyway, your bro sounds scary. 29 still behave like that. better be-careful sia. later really throw knives at you man.
anyway, if ur parents dont voice out anything, den bo bian lor. The least u could do is to help them also, i think they have eyes to see one la.. who help and who didnt.. who is good to them and whos not.
and did u mention that your bro is unemployed?? then what he do every day?
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Hi themoment86, are you single and available? I would love to know more about you.
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Back to topic, my advise for you is to control your anger first. http://www.sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/250036 . Then slowly help your brother with understanding and wisdom.
BTW, I have the same problem as you, the difference is that the one that does no house work and bring BF home ... is someone a year younger than you...
( I will not say much about her and I certainly cannot stand anger+screaming+crying.) -
This is your brother character. Now your father still can clean up the house and all. Wait till the day when he has his own house, you will see a pig sty coming up instead.
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Originally posted by Junyang700:
I have a neighbour who washes his corridor all the way to the lift corridor by himself every morning, and he has a maid.
Me too. I wash and scrub the corridor. lol. If not I will feel very disgusted that everyone is stepping near my house boundary with their muddy dirty shoes.
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no lo..he say le..his wife will do all the household chores..cause that's her job as a wife...-.-" i feel so proud of my father who help mummy out with chores..ppl say like father like son..apparently...wahahaha
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Originally posted by themoment86:
no lo..he say le..his wife will do all the household chores..cause that's her job as a wife...-.-" i feel so proud of my father who help mummy out with chores..ppl say like father like son..apparently...wahahaha
I understand. You don't like to see your father at this age still doing such menial household chores when your brother can be helping out too. However, your brother doesn't feel a tinge of guiltiness to see his father mopping away like crazy and keeping the house clean right?
lol. Such siblings is everywhere. You really got to live with it.