serious advice needed for another complicated relationship
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I think G is like a lost sheep.. he wanted to pull himself out of this sh!t n also help the gers but he just cldnt do it...Originally posted by Devil1976:Question. What do you think of 'G' and why do you wanna help him?
Do me a favor? Gather me the below information...?
1. Age of all 3 involved parties (namely 'A', 'B' & 'G')
2. Horoscope of the 3.
3. Horoscope and age of 'G' 's EX. and reason for their break off.
4. Your horoscope.
'A' - Stability.
'B' - Possession.
'G' - Uncertainty / Sticky Lap.
Regards.
A: 27
B: 23
G: 27
A: virgo
B: pisces
G: cancer -
it would be difficult to pull out of this..if both gers find tat this guy is sutiable for him, how would they let go??..esp for A who is now 27yo..if she gives up, will she ever find another sutiable guy??..Originally posted by Qoo`~`:I think G is like a lost sheep.. he wanted to pull himself out of this sh!t n also help the gers but he just cldnt do it...
A: 27
B: 23
G: 27
A: virgo
B: pisces
G: cancer -
I have a feeling that he is waiting for the 2 gals esp A to initiate to leave the relationship. just like what yun had said, he dont want to be the bad guy... if anything happen after the break initiated by the gals, he can say its not due to him.
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[quote]Originally posted by Imperfect:
I have a feeling that he is waiting for the 2 gals esp A to initiate to leave the relationship. just like what yun had said, he dont want to be the bad guy... if anything happen after the break initiated by the gals, he can say its not due to him.[/quote
Well, if G is really waiting, i feel that he shldnt do tt. It will only drag on and its like delaying the inevitable! For both A and B, i think they shld also change their thinking abit. Wats there to fight for a guy who is 2 timing? Sort of abit silly to wan to die for him as it snot worth it. -
if both A & B fall into the sea...which 1 will G choose to save?
My advice is dump both girls...& all become single is best!!no troubles.....!no tong ku........Chang tong bu ru duan tong!~...no pt carrying on & on.......they should separate frm one another for some time mayb go for a holiday let mind fresh... -
u know its very hard to change aperson's thinking...unless something major happens...like either A or B is carrying G's child.. (touchwood) dun make things more commplicated
the two gers are really stubborn.. dries my saliva when talking to them... -
haha i ask him this question already, hewld save A coz he said B is stronger (emotional & physically) so he wld save A first.Originally posted by Xiao Long Nu:if both A & B fall into the sea...which 1 will G choose to save?
My advice is dump both girls...& all become single is best!!no troubles.....!no tong ku........Chang tong bu ru duan tong!~...no pt carrying on & on.......they should separate frm one another for some time mayb go for a holiday let mind fresh... -
huh lidat 1 ahh wat if B dono hw to swim will die leh..haha...then u ask him...if both girls kana like audrea case...which 1 will he donate his liver to?Originally posted by Qoo`~`:haha i ask him this question already, hewld save A coz he said B is stronger (emotional & physically) so he wld save A first.
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Originally posted by Qoo`~`:thanks for yr advise, however, begining close to the guy, and understand him and his problems, i dare say that my ans are similar to his.. so here im trying to help him by posting.
What you replied were already expected; and what he should do, I already replied.
You mentioned that B and G acted like real couple - that's his main problem. His changeability nature - initial thought of having a fling, now change that rule because he feels she can be a good gf. The rule about fling is that, once we had our fun, byebye, lets move on with our life. He didn't. He change that rule and implicate his current relationship.
The fault begins with him and it has to end with him, using his initiative.I think G is like a lost sheep.. he wanted to pull himself out of this sh!t n also help the gers but he just cldnt do it...
There is no best of both world methods. Being a Cancer, he would want all parties to be emotionally satisfied - no such idea doesn't exist in his context. I mentioned before and would repeat again - he doesn't want to be the bad guy and rather circumstance lead this current situation. Tension will build up one day and either one of the girl will initiate the break up even if he does nothing.
Let me tell you, sucide is not born of the girl's character - rather is his lack of duty as a bf that created such effect in their behaviour. He is the SOURCE of their dispair and the stagnant of leading a futureless (if there is a word) relationship is depressing. I give you one very good example: Even B, tried attempting sucide after entering into a relationship with him. I would understand that inferior complex of A could do something tootpid (virgo, mental)- but if BOTH parties were to react the same way, don't you think such behaviour are actually factors and influence from his behavour of leading the badly-lead relationship?
You said that he tried very hard - but is it effective? Trying speaks half the story - it has to be effective. Therefore, simply, the old ways of handling is wrong and must be improved. He has to consider my choice of advice if he wants the better of the three (in my previous post.) The day when he don't mind being the 'bad guy', would be the day this thing can end.
Cheers -
he will donate both liver (if human got two liver)to them. whatever it is, he ans wld be always for A. coz he feel that he own her too much liao..Originally posted by Xiao Long Nu:huh lidat 1 ahh wat if B dono hw to swim will die leh..haha...then u ask him...if both girls kana like audrea case...which 1 will he donate his liver to? -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
sorry, if im begin to defensive for him..but serously thats him..
There is no best of both world methods. Being a Cancer, he would want all parties to be emotionally satisfied - no such idea doesn't exist in his context. I mentioned before and would repeat again - [b]he doesn't want to be the bad guy and rather circumstance lead this current situation. Tension will build up one day and either one of the girl will initiate the break up even if he does nothing.
Let me tell you, sucide is not born of the girl's character - rather is his lack of duty as a bf that created such effect in their behaviour. He is the SOURCE of their dispair and the stagnant of leading a futureless (if there is a word) relationship is depressing. I give you one very good example: Even B, tried attempting sucide after entering into a relationship with him. I would understand that inferior complex of A could do something tootpid (virgo, mental)- but if BOTH parties were to react the same way, don't you think such behaviour are actually factors and influence from his behavour of leading the badly-lead relationship?
You said that he tried very hard - but is it effective? Trying speaks half the story - it has to be effective. Therefore, simply, the old ways of handling is wrong and must be improved. He has to consider my choice of advice if he wants the better of the three (in my previous post.) The day when he don't mind being the 'bad guy', would be the day this thing can end.
Cheers [/b]
initially he admitted that he wanted to avoid being the bad guy role, but now.. oth a abd b knows that he is a bad guy already..so its transparent to both gers who is at fault..
but both the gers chose to hate each party (love have blind them? i dunno) esp for B coz she feels that B and G are truely in love coz of A they cant be together. and i believe A feels like wise too...
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That cannot be an excuse for it already has been an excuse for him for so long. The day when he stop using this excuse for himself is the day when he is ready to handle his own crisis.Originally posted by Qoo`~`:sorry, if im begin to defensive for him..but serously thats him..
initially he admitted that he wanted to avoid being the bad guy role, but now.. oth a abd b knows that he is a bad guy already..so its transparent to both gers who is at fault..
but both the gers chose to hate each party (love have blind them? i dunno) esp for B coz she feels that B and G are truely in love coz of A they cant be together. and i believe A feels like wise too...
Bad guy? Transparent? If he doesn't mind, he has to take the first initiative in settling this case once and for all. Let me predict, even if A were to go off and B would be with G, chances are, they wouldn't last long as well. He doesn't want to stop at the habour and wait for the ship, instead he chose to ship hop. but when you ship hop, chances are, you will fall into the deep water and eventually have to swim back to the habour.
P.S: If he was my friend, basically, this is what I would tell him. Being a friend, I would like to see his life enriched and basically fulfilling. I definitely would advice him on the best course of action as well for such problems are totally unneccessary - he brought it upon himself. Since he is the one who conjure the problems, no doubt solution must be initiated by him.
Cheers -
Wah... you story seems to be more interesting than mine hor
(base on replies... hahaha)
OK today got more energy to diguest another r/s issue.
I feel like this is a case of not knowing when to draw the line. If G and B start as a fling (base on dictionary.com is -- A brief sexual or romantic relationship) then it should end long ago.
If G is a muslim then get the gals to like each other and he gets to keep both. Problem solved.
If not, then he have to really make a stand on who he wants. If he had pull himself out of the fling earlier this would not have happened. Relastionship like this is the longer you drag.... the worse it gets. It's like in a quick sand... the more you stay in it.. the deeper you get till a stage all die inside the quick sand.
Maybe can try 'distracting' either gals... by intorducing them to more guy friends... make someone chase after one then she can forget about G.
pang guan ze qing... dang ju ze mi.... it's always hard to talk sense to someone in r/s problem. Besides we don't even know what's the real stories behind. Who know it might got yourself in trouble if you tried too hard to help. (learn my lesson on this ) -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
thanks Yunhaier.
That cannot be an excuse for it already has been an excuse for him for so long. The day when he stop using this excuse for himself is the day when he is ready to handle his own crisis.
Bad guy? Transparent? If he doesn't mind, he has to take the first initiative in settling this case once and for all. Let me predict, even if A were to go off and B would be with G, chances are, they wouldn't last long as well. He doesn't want to stop at the habour and wait for the ship, instead he chose to ship hop. but when you ship hop, chances are, you will fall into the deep water and eventually have to swim back to the habour.
P.S: If he was my friend, basically, this is what I would tell him. Being a friend, I would like to see his life enriched and basically fulfilling. I definitely would advice him on the best course of action as well for such problems are totally unneccessary - he brought it upon himself. [b]Since he is the one who conjure the problems, no doubt solution must be initiated by him.
Cheers [/b]
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Pray that none of the girls are actually you, if not gonna nag you to death.Originally posted by Qoo`~`:thanks Yunhaier. 
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Originally posted by Yunhaier:Pray that none of the girls are actually you, if not gonna nag you to death.
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additonal info:
spoke to B last night, she tells me that all she had done was a waste of time (glad that she realise it) however, she is just waiting forsome other guy to come along and "save" her from this mess while still going along with G.
from the way i see it,it is not like thia..coz B has no lack of suitors.. many guys went after her during the 2-3 years.. but shekan bu shang them.. haf a feeling that she only said those things to me like an excuse to shut me up... (she called me su Ku first)
sms A last night also.. sheon the other hand said that she will love this guy forever and ever...
haiz.. dunno what to do sia...
both plead me to talk to G to accept them. how?? -
problem is he is not a muslim...Originally posted by X-men:Wah... you story seems to be more interesting than mine hor (base on replies... hahaha)
OK today got more energy to diguest another r/s issue.
I feel like this is a case of not knowing when to draw the line. If G and B start as a fling (base on dictionary.com is -- A brief sexual or romantic relationship) then it should end long ago.
If G is a muslim then get the gals to like each other and he gets to keep both. Problem solved.
If not, then he have to really make a stand on who he wants. If he had pull himself out of the fling earlier this would not have happened. Relastionship like this is the longer you drag.... the worse it gets. It's like in a quick sand... the more you stay in it.. the deeper you get till a stage all die inside the quick sand.
Maybe can try 'distracting' either gals... by intorducing them to more guy friends... make someone chase after one then she can forget about G.
pang guan ze qing... dang ju ze mi.... it's always hard to talk sense to someone in r/s problem. Besides we don't even know what's the real stories behind. Who know it might got yourself in trouble if you tried too hard to help. (learn my lesson on this ) -
B is such a pisces man. I have a Pisces good friend who acts exactly the same way as her - waiting for another guy to save her from this mess. I told her about the ship hop analogy, she told me that she is someone who needs constant care and love. (Not surprising for a Pisces), but I told her for long term, it's not good for her. Still, she is still like that.Originally posted by Qoo`~`:additonal info:
spoke to B last night, she tells me that all she had done was a waste of time (glad that she realise it) however, she is just waiting forsome other guy to come along and "save" her from this mess while still going along with G.
from the way i see it,it is not like thia..coz B has no lack of suitors.. many guys went after her during the 2-3 years.. but shekan bu shang them.. haf a feeling that she only said those things to me like an excuse to shut me up... (she called me su Ku first)
sms A last night also.. sheon the other hand said that she will love this guy forever and ever...
haiz.. dunno what to do sia...
both plead me to talk to G to accept them. how??
She has no lack of suitors as well - just that, no one is that good enough to make her leave his current bf, whom I feel isn't much of a good bf as well (considering her qualities, she can always get someone better). This person cannot be just good, it has to be terribly much better before she would leap. Both of them ask you to do something, but they failed to realise that the real solution lies within the guy.
Cheers -
I know lah.Originally posted by Qoo`~`:problem is he is not a muslim...
From the additional info u provide, looks like this mess is going to last for a while more.
I think really need G to make up his mind lor. A & B would not let go.
It's like a man holding one to 2 gals over a cliff, dropping either one will send them to death, yet he cannot hold on to both as the hands are hurting really bad.... but still he have to make a choice of dropping one else it will pull all THREE of them down to the grave below. -
hahhaha yup yup that the exact characteristic of pisces man... but im more interested to knw A,coz she is rather quiet.Ask her if she as told anyone abt this, she said no coz she doesnt wan her friends judge (or say bad things) G.. unlike B told to every friends that she has, maybe thats the way she relieve her stress, bt talking it out. to me,A is very sweet in this sense..dunno abt other things she did for G. guess she is also a vERY nice lady willingly to sacrifice for G anytime.Originally posted by Yunhaier:B is such a pisces man. I have a Pisces good friend who acts exactly the same way as her - waiting for another guy to save her from this mess. I told her about the ship hop analogy, she told me that she is someone who needs constant care and love. (Not surprising for a Pisces), but I told her for long term, it's not good for her. Still, she is still like that.
She has no lack of suitors as well - just that, no one is that good enough to make her leave his current bf, whom I feel isn't much of a good bf as well (considering her qualities, she can always get someone better). This person cannot be just good, it has to be terribly much better before she would leap. Both of them ask you to do something, but they failed to realise that the real solution lies within the guy.
Cheers
guess they realise that, guess that they dun wan toput pressure to G, both knows G well enuff that he hates them pestering him.. -
if thats the case, B will let go offG's hand.. confirm.. once they had a confrontation in a car, A sat next to the driver's seat and told B that she is the intruder (3rd party), B was very very sad and leFT.. that scene make G very sad too.. he doesnt want either person to get hurt...(come to think of it..it really makes me wanna cry)Originally posted by X-men:I know lah.
From the additional info u provide, looks like this mess is going to last for a while more.
I think really need G to make up his mind lor. A & B would not let go.
It's like a man holding one to 2 gals over a cliff, dropping either one will send them to death, yet he cannot hold on to both as the hands are hurting really bad.... but still he have to make a choice of dropping one else it will pull all THREE of them down to the grave below. -
Originally posted by Qoo`~`:hahhaha yup yup that the exact characteristic of pisces man... but im more interested to knw A,coz she is rather quiet.Ask her if she as told anyone abt this, she said no coz she doesnt wan her friends judge (or say bad things) G.. unlike B told to every friends that she has, maybe thats the way she relieve her stress, bt talking it out. to me,A is very sweet in this sense..dunno abt other things she did for G. guess she is also a vERY nice lady willingly to sacrifice for G anytime. I mean as a friend there is little you can do except to influence him - the real solution, in trying to settle this. Maybe you would like him to take a look at this topic and go through every single post here. He can PM me if he wish.
Cheers -
B suggested to G that she will go and talk to A, but G refuses coz he said A will even be stick onto him and force him even more. B felt useless and feel that she cant do anything to help B. they got into a quarral one day,and G told B "toldu that there's is day already, from day 1 we reconcile, u shld have be prepared that this will happen.told u that we shld stop, but u insist"
after hearing these, B heart really sank, coz she thought that she really love G and G too..nver expect G to said such things.....nonetheless, this stupid ger still wan to be with G.WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER~~~!!!!!
and A knowing that they still keep in touch.. still determine to be with G
WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM~~~!!!!!!!!! -
Originally posted by Qoo`~`:B suggested to G that she will go and talk to A, but G refuses coz he said A will even be stick onto him and force him even more. B felt useless and feel that she cant do anything to help B. they got into a quarral one day,and G told B "toldu that there's is day already, from day 1 we reconcile, u shld have be prepared that this will happen.told u that we shld stop, but u insist"
after hearing these, B heart really sank, coz she thought that she really love G and G too..nver expect G to said such things.....nonetheless, this stupid ger still wan to be with G.WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER~~~!!!!!
and A knowing that they still keep in touch.. still determine to be with G
WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM~~~!!!!!!!!! Avoidance, avoidance - I mentioned in all my previous post.
And if you recalled: I said before, none of them wished to lose to the other party. His solution lies within him - he have to consider the options I have stated in my first post.
Cheers